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A Metal Gear film from Uwe Boll?

No? Nooooooooooo!

Dark blue icons of video game controllers on a light blue background
Image credit: Eurogamer

Oh, dear. Not content with banging out big screen adaptations of BloodRayne, Dungeon Siege, Far Cry and Fear Effect, to name but a few, Dr Uwe Boll (no more of an actual Dr than Neil Fox, we suspect) has now expressed an interest in bringing us a Metal Gear Solid movie.

In an interview with film website Insomniac Mania, Boll said that the latest games to catch his eye are "Postal and Metal Gear." As we reported previously Boll has already acquired the rights to produce a game based on Running With Scissors' appalling FPS, but this is the first we've heard of Boll's interest in doing an MGS movie.

Fortunately, we can't imagine it happening, as Hideo Kojima's always been very protective of the idea. And we do mean fortunately. Some of us have seen House of the Dead.

Course, he'll want to get Dungeon Siege out of the way first - starring Leelee Sobieski, Ron Perlman and Jason Statham, the film is due out next year and according to Boll we can expect "rough brutal battles combined with martial arts action. The kind that is in HERO."

Insomniac Mania was sure to ask Boll the questions on everyone's lips, namely: "Will we see any hot women in metal underwear? ", "Will we see scantily clad women with swords?" and "Will Burt Reynolds have a moustache?"

(Answers, if you're interested: "Kristana Loken and Leelee Sobieski are warriors," "A few" and "A full grey beard.")

He also hinted that there could be a new Dungeon Siege game based on the film - "We're working on it," apparently. And as for those of you who might just have a tiny inkling that the movie's going to be an absolute stinker, Boll simply says: "Wait and see." Will do.

You can read the full interview on the Insomniac Mania website.

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