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Tired of waiting for Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom to arrive, I tried Flappy Souls

Poultry in motion.

My copy of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom is currently "out for delivery", and expected to arrive sometime this afternoon. It is now afternoon, and there's still no sign of it. To save myself from twiddling my thumbs while staring mindlessly at the wall, I decided to check out Flappy Souls.

Flappy Souls is a new, free release on Steam. It is marketed as being "a mix of Flappy Bird and Dark Souls", hence the name. The premise is remarkably simple - you have to fly around as a baseball cap-wearing bird while dodging obstacles. Smattered through these obstacles are souls that you have to collect, and as you progress you level up. And that's it. Easy, right? No, not right. This game is HARD!

Here is some Flappy Souls gameplay, but not mine as this person is actually pretty good.Watch on YouTube

Now, before I get too into it, let me ask - are you the kind of person who ducks a little when you go under a low bridge in a car? I am. For some reason, I have it hardwired into my brain that physically ducking will somehow ensure safer passage. Logically, of course, I know it makes absolutely no sense. If my car isn't going to fit, me ducking, or breathing in when I pass another vehicle on a slightly narrower stretch of road, isn't going to change that. And yet, I still do it.

I did the same sort of thing when I booted Flappy Souls up on my computer. The game has one control, at least I only used one control for the time I was playing, although full disclosure I died a lot so didn't actually get very far.

This single control is the up arrow key, and all you have to do is periodically push this to get your avian avatar to flap its wings while you negotiate the Flappy Bird-inspired stalagmites and stalactites. However, I couldn't stop myself from also ducking and weaving with my entire body from my desk chair (my husband peered at me from over the top of his computer, looked slightly bemused, clearly decided it was better not to ask, and sat back down again).

I was utterly awful at the game. Honestly, I can safely say I lived longer on my first playthrough of Demon's Souls where the game makes you intentionally die early on so it can whisk you away to The Nexus.

I kind of hate Flappy Souls. But, I also kind of love it in a 'I feel incredibly compelled to keep going so I can beat my high score' sort of way. DPD may well be just around the corner with my copy of Tears of the Kingdom, but for now, I am heading back to that grim and punishing world of Flappy Souls to try my luck just one more time...

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