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Uwe Boll pounds critic

In the face.

He might have as much skill behind the camera as the worst GCSE Media Studies student but videogame movie director Uwe Boll has used hidden talents to fight back at his harshest critics, beating the hell out of them in a boxing ring and then posting the fights online.

The 41-year-old Alone in the Dark ‘auteur’, known for cinematically massacring every game to cross his path, announced earlier in the year he would by taking on five film critics mano-a-mano (but not in that way) as part of the production of Postal.

The first bout has just appeared online and, unfortunately for his legions of detractors, Boll convincingly knocks the stuffing out of his useless opponent. The scrap appeared in full on YouTube today and, after a slow start, Boll quickly starts decking his mullet-haired adversary. Rumours the victim was "softened up" by having to sit through Boll’s BloodRayne beforehand are probably made up but you never know.

Still, there are four more fights scheduled, including one against Something Awful webmaster Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka, and hopefully one of them will turn out to be with some sort of human/tank hybrid, complete with Robot Wars-style chainsaw attachment.

Clips of each bout will feature in the movie Postal, based on Running with Scissors’ controversy-baiting and quite rubbish game about a postal service employee who goes on a killing spree. It’s due out next year and will star pint-sized former child actor Gary Coleman.

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Paul Devlin