Download Games Roundup
Elastic! Shank! Racers! Balls! Witches!
Welcome to a slightly watered-down Download Games Roundup where the quality of the offerings is not quite as tip top as it usually is. But there's a good reason for that! For one, most of the games I was planning to cover got bumped up into full reviews, which is always a good sign.
A game like And Yet It Moves was simply too good not to shout about as loudly as possible, while Dead Rising 2: Case Zero was just too high profile. And then there's DoDonpachi Resurrection, which we've got lined up for a full review in the next few days.
So that left a few gaps, and the alternatives weren't quite as exciting, unfortunately, and demonstrated how variable the quality threshold is when it comes to downloadable games. It wasn't all bad news though. Read on to see why.
Tales of Elastic Boy: Mission 1
- WiiWare / 600 Wii Points (£5.60)
Tales of Elastic Boy had so much potential. I imagined a brooding tale of a misunderstood youngling who faced a long stretch for armed rubbery. (Kill me now.) Instead, we get example number 327 of why shoehorning motion controls into conventional platform games is a terrible idea.
Simple navigation, jumping and combat is rendered an exasperating chore at every turn, as you fumble around trying to persuade your yellow blob (known, for the record, as Mooky) to do as he's told.
With no choice but to use motion control for every element of movement, you have to hold down B while tilting the Wii remote left or right, flick up to jump, and hold down A and B and then flick down to ground pound. Adopting these imprecise actions is bad enough, but to force players to point at the screen and press A every time you want to grab onto a sticky item makes the whole thing intolerable. Bad form, Lexis Numerique.
What could have been a mildly enjoyable platform excursion swiftly degenerates into one of the worst adverts for motion control I've ever seen. Suffice to say, we won't be rushing out to check Mission 2.