Hello! Our very own Martin will be reporting tonight from the other side of the Atlantic, while here in Blighty we'll be staying up as long as we can...
It'll likely be a 4am finish here, in case you'd rather catch-up in the morning.
Yes, it's a late one. And yes it's likely to be a late one filled with lots of vacuous nonsense, too. But! If you do fancy staying up 'til 2am GMT, The Game Awards could well reward you with some exciting reveals and a confirmed all-new look at The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild. Hopefully see you then!
Hello! Our very own Martin will be reporting tonight from the other side of the Atlantic, while here in Blighty we'll be staying up as long as we can...
That said, tonight actually has some very intriguing stuff lined-up. Here's what's confirmed so far...
Top of the bill for me is a long-awaited next look at The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild. It's been ages since we saw it last at E3.
Eurogamer reported last month that Zelda would miss the Nintendo Switch's March launch - so keep an eye out for news of its release date.
BioWare will show an extended look at Mass Effect Andromeda. We'll finally see how it plays and find out about more aliens for fans to romance.
Telltale is also turning up. Expect to see its new Walking Dead season and - we've heard - a first look at its secret Marvel project...
An anouncement from Duke Nukem studio Gearbox and a good look at Prey are also on the cards. Oh and some awards. Can't forget them.
Sorry, don't know how that got there.
Oi oi! And hello from sunny California, where amazingly I've flown halfway around the world to watch the show from a hotel room in Anaheim.
Even more amazingly, I've reached the point in my life where I pack my own teabags on a trip to the states, so I'm going to be hitting the rooibos pretty hard. Living it up over here pretty much.
Also I'm stocked up with the biggest box of Junior Mints you've ever seen, and screw it I'm going to the 7-Eleven in a tick to get a few bottles of Sierra Nevada. Which should help with the jetlag, for sure.
That Keighley outfit that Chris posted earlier - I'm pretty sure that was my get-up when I went to my school disco in 1993.
Waistcoats were *huge* back then. As were plastic briefcases. We also tore up the dancefloor to the Grease medley that night. Massive.
I wonder if Geoff has a plastic briefcase?
Glixel has just posted a decent profile of Keighley that's worth having a look at while we pass the hours before it all kicks off.
I'll admit I've got a bit of a soft spot for Keighley. For all the criticism that comes his way he's clearly a guy who cares about games (and if you've ever read any of his Final Hours pieces, despite the more corporate position he's in these days he's also a fine journalist).
90 minutes to go until the event kicks off proper, so I'm off to the strip mall for supplies. Can I get anyone anything?
They were out of Sierra Nevada so I got everyone an Anchor Steam. Hope that's okay?
25 min wooohoo
That's until the pre-show. The actual thing kicks off in 45 minutes. Not that there'll be much difference.
I'm in the office on my own for this. What should I do to Donlan's desk?
Clean his keyboard for him?
I'd kind of forgotten that there's actually an awards ceremony attached to this. The title of the show should have been a clue, I guess.
Seems a bit early to be calling games of the year given that Final Fantasy 15 has only just hit shelves and The Last Guardian isn't out yet, but hey ho.
Geoff. Geoff! GEOFF! You're supposed to have started the stream, mate.
Has anyone seen Geoff? The pre-show should have started four minutes ago. GEOFF?
Maybe he's lost his favourite waistcoat or something.
Oh, here's Geoff! Hello!
A rundown of what to expect - Zelda, Mass Effect, maybe a flicker of life in Geoff's sharklike eyes at some point.
'There's one thing in this show that's absolutely incredible' teases Geoff. I hope it's a new waistcoat.
Young Wesley was on the panel for these awards. I think he must have just voted for Street Fighter 5 in every category.
So, the big question right now. Is it safe to have a beer now?
Who's drinking what at home? Tell me now - I'm genuinely interested!
They're talking about the story the award itself tells. How it's about the ascension of games.
Good god ascension is a hard word to spell.
Hideo Kojima was spotted belting out some tunes during rehearsals on stage earlier.
Hope he comes on and does Chaka Khan's 'I Feel For You' later.
Preferably while making suggestive motions towards Mark Cerny and ending up gyrating in his lap.
Would be well up for that.
Has this bullshit finished yet?
Joff Kealey's waistcoat has EVOLVED into its final form, a jacket with TOO MANY BUTTONS.
He looks like he's auditioning for a part in Final Fantasy 15.
A teaser now for Breath of the Wild's trailer.
Oh, this is the trailer now. Get in.
I wonder if this is the Switch version? It looks much more detailed to what we've seen before.
But perhaps that's because this is a look away from the plateau that's been showcased to date.
A small glimpse of what's to come later, that. Can't wait for the full thing!
Aaaaand the first award goes, with little fanfare, to Niantic and Pokémon Go. And some guy reading a speech from his phone.
They're keeping the awards brief then, it seems.
I missed Zelda trailer? Noooooooo...
The full thing is coming later - fret not!
Another premiere now, with Rocket League making an appearance.
THE SHOW HASN'T EVEN STARTED YET WHAT'S GOING ON.
Starbase Arc, a new arena, is coming to Rocket League. For FREEEEE.
And it's out next week - December 7th.
SLOW IT DOWN GEOFF, YOU'VE GOT 8 MINUTES TO GO UNTIL THE SHOW STARTS.
Randy Pitchfork, the man behind Aliens: Colonial Marines, is now on stage.
They're announcing Gearbox Publishing, and their first title is from People Can Fly - who are doing a new Bulletstorm?
Wait a second.
Are they announcing a new Bulletstorm?
It's out next April. Is it a remaster? I guess so.
If you pre-order, you can play the whole game as Duke Nukem, voiced by John St. John.
Yup, Full Clip Edition is a remaster/remake it seems. That's no bad thing - this is truly a great game.
That's it. I'M HAVING A BEER.
Well, there's your Duke Nukem news - he's going to be part of the Bulletstorm remaster.
And some more awards. GEOFF, honestly! SLOW DOWN. Rez Infinite takes best VR game - the only choice - and Street Fighter 5 takes best fighting game.
They keep going on about how Michael Phelps will be here. Is that a big deal? I had to Google him, because I'm awful like that.
I hope he comes on in just his Speedos.
I hope *all* the winners come on in just their Speedos, in fact.
I'm imagining Geoff in Speedos now.
Still thinking about it.
Will stop thinking about it now.
We're 30 seconds away from GAMING'S BIGGEST NIGHT!
There's going to be some offensive material, according to a brief disclaimer. GET IN.
When I worked in a cinema there was a creepy guy who always asked whether the film we were showing had offensive violence and/or preferably nudity. Would only buy a ticket if it did.
Anyway, games. Wonderful, aren't they?
Apparently it's Aaron Paul, the guy from the Need for Speed film, narrating this.
An aerial shot of LA! I'm somewhere on the horizon, in a pretty pokey hotel room.
Geoff gets on stage clutching an award. What did he win that for?
Certainly not for that jacket, I'll tell you that much.
Seriously, the button situation on that thing is off the charts.
It's out of control.
Geoff hearts Kojima so much.
I think he's imagined Kojima in his Speedos before.
Kojima was locked in a room for six months away from the main team during the last stretch of Metal Gear Solid 5's development.
Keighley's voice is breaking as he tells everyone how much he loves Koj.
This is laying it on quite thick, isn't it?
Here's your award anyway, Koj.
And now... KISS KISS KISS KISS!
Geoff reached in there, and for a moment it did look like he was going for the lips.
As it is he goes for a respectful hug.
'Last year, I thought I lost everything. But I didn't lose anything, thanks to all of you'.
'I love you, Geoff'.
I don't think this can be topped now.
What raw emotion!
Kojima has bought an early gift - a look at Death Stranding.
The internet will be awash with Kojima/Keighley bromance fiction tomorrow.
I want to read ALL OF IT.
Guillermo Del Toro is in Death Stranding?
It's a weird, messed up WW2-esque setting we're seeing. Very dreamlike.
Del Toro has a baby in a small incubator unit and god I think this is even weirder than the initial reveal of Death Stranding.
Which is a hell of a feat.
I still have no idea what this game actually is.
I think even after I've played it I'll have no idea what it was.
Mads Mikkelsen also makes an appearance, seemingly as the villain.
I'm hoping we get to see a bit more of Death Stranding at Sony's show on Saturday.
That was running in real-time on a PS4 Pro.
More awards. And more great deals on PlayStation Network! A weird sales pitch interlude there.
A brief Warframe update.
Aaaand an advert break. I'm off to the fridge!
Actually this whole thing's kind of an advert break. Such as this brief look at the Assassin's Creed movie.
There's enough talent behind this film to suggest it could be the first properly decent video game movie.
Well, that was brief.
Run the Jewels give us our first performance of the night. Ooooh, this is all getting a bit Top of the Pops now.
They've done a very good job remembering all the words to this song.
There's a lot of words to remember.
Martin, we say that every time about video game movies. Something something definition of insanity.
Yeah, but this time's going to be different, right? Right?
They've remembered the words to *two* different songs, which is doubly impressive.
That man in the cap is going to burn through his CD collection if he keeps rubbing them like that.
In fairness, I didn't think that joke was that good.
Still, well done all. Here's Uncharted 4!
Troy, Elena and Nolan all here to present the art direction award.
Which just has to go Overwatch's way, surely?
Though I think everything should go Overwatch's way if there's any justice in this world.
Inside would also be a worthy winner, mind. And they quickly announce over the tannoy that Inside also wins best independent game.
After a enjoyably glib acceptance speech from Playdead, here's a look at Telltale's Guardians of the Galaxy game.
We get a logo... Well, it's not as if we don't know how it'll play.
Aaaand another ad break.
Is this another skit?
I think my jetlag has got the better of my humour gland.
Conan Doyle is now here to present the best action game.
Though he hasn't actually turned up to the awards.
This one has to be DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM, right?
Or maybe Titanfall 2. Or Overwatch. Okay, it's been a pretty good year.
DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM it is.
They keep pronouncing it wrong. It should be screamed out DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM.
iJustine and Matpat - that's not their real names! - are up to present the next awards.
Games with the most impact - That Dragon, Cancer, Orwell, 1979 Revolution and some other fine nominees.
That Dragon, Cancer is a rightful winner of the award.
A genuinely touching moment as Ryan Green accepts the award.
A beautiful moment for a beautiful game. Congratulations to Ryan and his team.
And from that we're sadly too quickly ushered into an advert break and a skit.
Dauntless, a new free-to-play PC game from a bunch of veteran devs, is being debuted.
A sublime art style - and some serious talent in the dev team - means this could be one to keep an eye on.
Peter Moore, who has covered up his nipples with a smart jacket, takes to the stage.
To announce the trending gamer thing. Is young Bratt going to win this one?
No, wait, it's Boogie989897597909. Well done?
'Not just another hero shooter' says the blurb in the trailer for Lawbreakers as I think to myself it looks just like another hero shooter.
why oh why am i awake at 3 a.m. watching this?
A man is telling us how much fun he just had in a VR experience.
I'm really sorry if you did stay up 'til 3am for this. It's not my fault, honest.
That chap looked thoroughly bored.
Doom's soundtrack LIVE should be just the tonic to wake me from the slumber I'm on the verge of.
So yeah, now's as good a time as any to bellow DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM.
It's what I'm doing in my hotel room right now.
Don't think the family next door who are just here for a weekend in Disneyland appreciate it that much tbh.
A couple hours of advertising disguised as a tribute to the industry? Trying not to be negative, but damn, this is just so... ugh. I need a shower.
It does need to calm down a bit on the adverts if it wants to be taken seriously. BAFTA does a much better job at that - if only its categories/winners weren't so wide of the mark so often.
Ted Price, the man you can always rely on for a ridiculously oversized shirt, takes to the stage.
The best performer this year is Nolan North. For Uncharted, and maybe for the other 174 games he's been in this year.
Arkane's Raphael is on-stage to show some new Prey gameplay.
More importantly, though, what's going on with *his* jacket?
I think it's got leather arms. A truly avant garde choice.
This looks very much to be to System Shock what Dishonored was to Thief.
In other words YES PLEASE.
STOP TRYING TO MAKE MICHAEL PHELPS HAPPEN.
Aaand more adverts. I think.
Who is this Bosman chap? Is he always so unbearable?
Maggie Phillips now to present an award.
Fully clothed, though I know that Phelps is wearing Speedos under that get-up.
Famously Phelps eats a whole pizza and a pound of pasta as part of his 12,000 calorie diet during big events.
I was going to make a joke about people who play games also having a 12,000 calorie a day diet but I just can't bring myself to. Sorry.
Anyway, Coldzera wins best eSports player.
Best sports/racing game now. Fingers crossed for Forza Horizon 3 here. Because it's just about the best thing.
THE ONLY CHOICE. Forza Horizon 3 wins.
Dan Greenawalt has let himself go
I was just thinking the same...
Reggie. The Reggienator. Big Reg. The R-man.
An absolute statue of a man. A big boulder of corporate beef. Come squirt some Zelda right in my mouth.
'There's even more that we want to share with you tonight'. A release date would be nice.
Eiji Aonuma continues to be the only guy that can make a centre parting look legitimately cool.
They're playing the Wii U version. In case there was any doubt they wouldn't be.
Martin,slow down on the beers man.
I've only had one!
Well, no release date. But a look at more Zelda is always welcome.
Although to be honest I don't want to see any more of Zelda until I can actually play it.
Another world premiere. You're spoiling us! It's a new game from Yacht Games.
Ah, no it's more Shovel Knight.
Yup, it's more Shovel Knight alright.
I thought I also had only one beer, but I just saw a man dressed as a razor, so I must be wasted.
I can't tell if that's a joke or a real thing. I don't know what's going on anymore.
Mark Sony is onstage now, citing Hitchcock - a big inspiration behind Knack and an even bigger influence on its sequel which is basically just a remake of Psycho.
Uncharted 4 gets the best narrative award.
There's already a remake of Psycho though...
Yeah, fair enough. This is a gritty deboot though.
We're back in the red room, which is somehow even more horrific and terrifying than the one in Twin Peaks.
Maybe *this* is Twin Peaks season three.
Cut to Cerny sitting in a chair, uttering 'Knaaaaack' backwards.
Before then, though! Adverts!
343 Industries up now to plug Halo Wars 2.
The bored man from earlier is now back to present the award for best game direction.
And the winner is... Overwatch! And here's Jeff from the Overwatch team.
What a mighty, mighty man.
What's his Ult Martin?
It's a blitz of pure modesty that disarms everyone in the match.
This is the final stretch now. Stay strong, people.
Only about 12 more adverts to fit into the next 10 minutes.
Oh, and Mass Effect. There's always that too.
Before all that, though, it's some muzak.
One of those men has his boobies out.
And the man with his boobies out is having a hell of a time. This is playing havoc with nipplewatch - the first time we've had real live nipples on stage at an event, I believe.
That's over now. It's done.
So we have best action adventure game.
Another chance to see Raphael's crazy jacket as Dishonored 2 wins.
Raph, mate, you can't get away with sleeves like that outside of a French discotheque.
Okay, so *this* is the final stretch now, just beyond this ad break.
It's Mass Effect and the overall winner. First up it's Andromeda being shown LIVE for the first time.
Here it is. The big one. Though didn't we see it being played at the Pro reveal?
Already this is looking loads better than the previous reveal.
Actually I take that back.
This looks a bit... Like muck? It looks very similar to the quite underwhelming Dragon Age: Inquisition.
With incredibly bland art direction to match, and some horrific facial animation.
I wonder if they're still using Google Image search for their art direction.
Well, that was Mass Effect. Fill 'yer boots.
C'MON LET'S WRAP THIS UP MY ROOM SERVICE HAS JUST ARRIVED.
So, the BIGGEST NIGHT in gaming comes to a climax.
And Overwatch wins!
The right choice. The only choice!
What's the climax Martin? Don't keep us in suspense... what did you order for room service?
Some linguine with shrimp. I'm pretty pumped about it tbh.
Oh, also that was The Game Awards 2016.
That was... Something.
Still, Death Stranding looks crazier than ever. And I've just sat through so many adverts I think I need a shower.
Thank you/sorry etc.
I promise you that Saturday's PlayStation show will be better.
That's at 10am PT - or 6pm GMT. It's going to be good.
i wish i slept
Me too. And it's only 8pm over here.
Until then. PASTA.