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Live: Ubisoft E3 2013 Conference

The third place. Live coverage from 11pm BST / midnight CEST.

Over the last few years, Ubisoft's press conference has become the show to catch during E3: crazy presenters spout endless non-sequiturs amidst fabulous games that mess with your expectations. Perfect viewing for the middle of the night, then. It's at the Los Angeles Theater this year from 3pm PST, which is 11pm BST / midnight CEST.

If you're around, you can follow it live here with Eurogamer writers in the US and the UK, some of whom remember the first UbiDays event in the guts of the Louvre many years ago where rabbits defecated live on stage. Can they top that? Find out.

Our live coverage of this event has finished.

Coverage

Tom Phillips

It's Ubisoft boss Yves Guillemot, noticing Patrice Desilet creeping up behind him.

Tom Phillips

If only there was a haystack handy for him to hide in.

Tom Phillips

Tonight we'll see more of Assassin's Creed 4: Black Flag and Watch Dogs, Ubisoft's two big open world games due out in time for Christmas.

Tom Phillips

Also look out for confirmation of The Crew, the new racing title from Driver: San Francisco developer Reflections.

Tom Phillips

There's also been rumours of a new Prince of Persia. What better time to relaunch the series than at the start of a new console generation?

Tom Phillips

As for Beyond Good & Evil fans - keep faith. Even if we hear nothing tonight.

Tom Phillips

Where do people stand on the last Prince of Persia reboot? The one that wasn't a movie tie-in. I actually quite enjoyed it.

Martin Robinson

Fingers crossed for a bit more Shaun White...

Christian Donlan

Shaun White's Half-Boarding would work. Breakfast is paid for but he has to find his own lunch.

Christian Donlan

Bon soir amigos! Let's Ubisoft!

Ellie Gibson

Nought to Ubisoft in three seconds.

Christian Donlan

He may dress at J Crew, but he can still rock.

Christian Donlan

No man over 30 needs to wear a pendant on a little leather string. Even rock stars.

Ellie Gibson

It's a guitar game! "OK 2007, let's ROCK!"

Ellie Gibson

Just seconds into the Ubi conference and already I have no idea what's going on. A new record. Usually it takes at least eight minutes.

Ellie Gibson

How could you have left Ross for the guy out of Mystery Men?

Christian Donlan

This year's Ubisoft press conference is brought to you by QVC.

Ellie Gibson

I've only just realised that's Lana from Archer.

Martin Robinson

"Belly first, ass out." That's Ubisoft all over.

Ellie Gibson

There is a lot of housekeeping to get out of the way up front this time.

Christian Donlan

"There are no stupid questions." Oh my friend. Oh my dear dear friend.

Ellie Gibson

"As they say at Ubisoft: didn't we get rid of you already, Patrice Desilets?"

Christian Donlan

Robert Purchese

Robert Purchese

That would be amazing, wouldn't it? A shadowy figure strides through the auditorium, up onto the stage. He smashes the screens over with a breathtaking series of fierce roundhouse kicks. Raising his fists to the ceiling he throws back his head and roars, "JE... SUIS... DESILEEEEEEEETS..."

Ellie Gibson

That's Shaun White!

Christian Donlan

This all gives me great hope that we WILL one day see the return of Gex and Bubsy.

Ellie Gibson

A hoodie? A HOODIE? Sir, you are on stage at E3! No one said black tie but good grief, make a bit of effort! Also, you are 41.

Ellie Gibson

Oh wait, is he French Canadian? Makes sense.

Ellie Gibson

French Canadians are born casual.

Christian Donlan

Their constitution has a zip on it.

Christian Donlan

DIGITAL CRACK. Yes, thanks to Ubisoft we'll all be living under bridges next year, begging passers by for any spare epic loot.

Ellie Gibson

YVESSSSSSSSS

Christian Donlan

She just called the internet pissy! I love this woman.

Ellie Gibson

Give it some, Guillemot!

Ellie Gibson

Crikey.

Christian Donlan

Watch out for the wisps of his wife's Gitane smoke curling in from the side of the stage.

Ellie Gibson

I hope he invites Tom Cruise on stage next.

Christian Donlan

Robert Purchese

Is he wearing a fleece? Good grief. This is not how wars are won.

Ellie Gibson

It's Driver and this time the car's in a coma!

Christian Donlan

(It isn't Driver.)

Christian Donlan

RENO!

Christian Donlan

Will its star ever stop rising?

Christian Donlan

Sadly the car carrying all the in-game footage got caught in a pile-up.

Christian Donlan

She accidentally inhaled Yves.

Christian Donlan

Is that it from Yves then? Early flight back to Lilliput?

Ellie Gibson

Robert Purchese

That is not the face that accompanies the word "fun".

Christian Donlan

And the universal hand gesture for "group up with your friends."

Christian Donlan

Is that a lanyard hanging of his trousers or is he just really unhappy to be here?

Ellie Gibson

Burnout's barriers! I'm already in favour of this game.

Christian Donlan

Robert Purchese

The hallmark of any good game presentation is a variation on the line, "See that mountain? You'll be able to..."

Christian Donlan

Robert Purchese

Robert Purchese

Just like those arcades on ferries where you can both have a go! Except £58 more.

Ellie Gibson

Mind you, it's easy to spend that before you're in sight of Calais if they've got a Jambo Safari machine.

Ellie Gibson

This is either a segue to Watch Dogs or the recent NSA thing.

Christian Donlan

Personally I'm looking forward to Game_and_Watch_Dogs, where you have to outwit a mysterious government agency across two LCD screens while avoiding barrels.

Ellie Gibson

Well I don't know. We've had one exec in a fleece, another in a hoodie, someone else dangling lanyards all over the place. I'm half expecting the next bloke to come out wearing Speedos and a beer can hat.

Ellie Gibson

YES.

Ellie Gibson

Eurogamer 10/10

Ellie Gibson

This is a live feed from inside Yves' head.

Christian Donlan

MURS.

Ellie Gibson

From the NSA to the cast of T4 in twenty seconds.

Christian Donlan

Oh my God ANY SONG YOU WANT I am digging out my Anal C*** collection

Ellie Gibson

That is literally the best thing I have ever seen.

Ellie Gibson

Just Dance got its start as a mini-game???!!! Impossible!

Ellie Gibson

Rabbid Invasion doesn't sound very cute.

Christian Donlan

I want to invade my TV to change that shirt.

Christian Donlan

Shirt.

Ellie Gibson

We did this with Season 3 of Engie Benjy back in the mid 2000s.

Christian Donlan

Let's just take a moment to remember Ubidays 2007, when they decided to put real live rabbits on the stage! Except they were terrified. So you saw these human hands shoving these little bundles out of the wings. And then they crapped everywhere. Happy days.

Ellie Gibson

"Fun, dancing and rabbits." That's certainly what I was hoping to get out of this year's E3.

Ellie Gibson

Don't you mean, you ARRRRR a pirate?

Ellie Gibson

Assassins don't really blend in, do they?

Christian Donlan

Pieces of 8 out of 10.

Ellie Gibson

I'm going to disguise myself...with this iconic hood.

Christian Donlan

"Anyone seen any assassins in here?" "Nope, not me, I'm just wearing this tea towel as a fashion statement."

Ellie Gibson

I bet they'll release a patch.

Ellie Gibson

I hope he said, "This will wheely hurt."

Christian Donlan

If Desilets storms the stage and shivs him, we will have all gone meta.

Christian Donlan

Oh, so now Ubisoft like pirates.

Christian Donlan

Corduroy?? Honestly. It's like Michael Foot and the donkey jacket.

Ellie Gibson

Piracy is killing gaming.

Ellie Gibson

Look out for Just Dance: Pirate Edition. "Stab to your left! Stab to your right!"

Ellie Gibson

Whale! Sold.

Christian Donlan

Can you shiv a whale?

Christian Donlan

Quite enjoyed that pirate trailer, even if it was a bit Man from Del Monte Meets Thom Yorke.

Ellie Gibson

RedLynx! And actual gameplay.

Christian Donlan

Robert Purchese

Yves! His wife has sent him out. "Ziss is your show. Go. MAINTENANT."

Ellie Gibson

She slowly grinds the Gitane under a Louboutin and reaches for another. "Allez."

Ellie Gibson

Dark Winter is coming!

Ellie Gibson

An MMO by people who read The New Statesmen.

Christian Donlan

Enjoy, @chrisdearman.

Ellie Gibson

How will they take all of this cutting edge material and turn it into rat punching?

Christian Donlan

There is no game. Yves is just very concerned about stuff.

Christian Donlan

Day 04: Elaine Page will cancel an appearance on Loose Women. Tesco's will run out of Hall's Soothers.

Ellie Gibson

Scarf! Must be French.

Ellie Gibson

Oh, just European.

Ellie Gibson

Ironic use of jaunty song.

Christian Donlan

Bronson? Mister Bronson out of Grange Hill? Now that would be the scariest video game boss ever.

Ellie Gibson

Magic watch! But can it play Candy Crush?

Ellie Gibson

All of this because somebody sneezed on a bank note, remember.

Christian Donlan

I bet it's Bobby Kotick's fault. "Kleenex? Pah. I'll just use this $100 bill."

Ellie Gibson

Cripes! Looks lovely. Horribly lovely.

Christian Donlan

Bit of a downer ending.

Christian Donlan

"You're all going to die! Anyway, we've been Ubisoft..."

Christian Donlan

They are showering the audience with money. Covered in snot. Oh, youbisoft.

Ellie Gibson

Not a classic conference by laser-taggin' Ubi standards, but that last game looks pretty special.

Christian Donlan

No BG&E, but there's always Gamescom.

Christian Donlan

Please join us for Sony at 2! Unless you have work tomorrow or that sort of thing.

Christian Donlan

See you at 2am for Sony's conference. Here's hoping they've finally finished sticking all the bits on that machine.

Ellie Gibson

Much love to you, Frunk.

Christian Donlan

Ah, early days.

Robert Purchese

Comments
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Tom Bramwell

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Tom worked at Eurogamer from early 2000 to late 2014, including seven years as Editor-in-Chief.

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