Bored, are ya? Not as bored as this woman, presumably, seeing as she sat on her boyfriend's toilet for two years and her skin grew around the seat. Perhaps she was playing Animal Crossing. "What surprises me is somebody wasn't called in a bit earlier," says someone called Ellis. Yes, that's what's surprising.

Not much else to surprise and astound this week, sadly, although it's nice to finally have the option to buy No More Heroes (amusingly on the same day after our Wii Freeloader finally turns up). Grasshopper/Suda 51's bizarre little philosophical examination of games via being an action game (complete with things that, unless we're missing something, appear to be deliberately 'metaphorically' rubbish) is amusing, stupid, brilliant and baffling and certainly worth buying, just as Killer 7 was before it.

We'll also buy Fire Emblem: Radiant Dawn, probably, even though it will be exactly the same as all the others (or, rather, because), and if you hear little yelping noises emanating from somewhere around Edinburgh it's probably the unheralded launch of Harvest Moon: Magical Melody on Wii dawning on our beloved Keza MacDonald. "I reckon this is the best Harvest Moon game ever made," she said of the Cube version, and this was the quote from her review: "If there's a hunger inherent to Harvest Moon: Magical Melody, it's the hunger to keep playing it until you've seen it all, and it'll be a long time until it's sated." Alright Wordsworth.

Otherwise we're not so much scraping the barrel as scratching at the soggy dirt beneath. For those of you curious about Turning Point: Fall of Liberty, we suspected there was a reason Codemasters was quiet about review code for so long, and so far we've gone through two levels and the initial impression is that it makes Turok look like Half-Life 2. We're not just saying that for cheap laughs, either. It's not DRIV3R bad, or anything, but it's not the droids you're looking for.

Anyway, we'd better get back to it, or you'll have nothing to read tomorrow.

This week:

  • AMF Bowling: Pinbusters! (Wii)
  • Brain Assist (DS)
  • Build A Bear Workshop (DS)
  • Buzz!: Pop Quiz (PS2)
  • Dragon Quest Monsters: Joker (DS)
  • Fire Emblem: Radiant Dawn (Wii)
  • Fish Tycoon (DS)
  • FlatOut: Head On (PSP)
  • Harvest Moon: Magical Melody (Wii)
  • Jumper (Wii)
  • Magic Made Fun (DS)
  • Ninja Reflex (Wii, DS)
  • No More Heroes (Wii)
  • Odin Sphere (PS2)
  • Star Trek: Conquest (Wii, PS2)
  • The Spiderwick Chronicles (Xbox 360, PS3, PC, PS2, Wii, DS)
  • Turning Point: Fall of Liberty (PS3, Xbox 360, PC)

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Tom Bramwell

Tom Bramwell

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Tom worked at Eurogamer from early 2000 to late 2014, including seven years as Editor-in-Chief.

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