You know, Christmas television is a lot like Bullet Hell. There's Remains Of The Day, sure, which is fun to watch back to back with Silence of the Lambs, but there are also 17 thousand episodes of Eastenders fired into your frame as you twist past the turkey and shake chocolate from the boss-tree.
Thank monolatry, then, that you can rely on a bit of festive downtime every so often, ripe for shooting terrorists or - more likely - trying to fertilise a gem tree so that it throws up a maximum-growth bonus. Yes, we're back - and this time it's horticultural.
And you're wondering what's to come. Well, as you see we've already started up the reviews again. Don't imagine January gets you out of that - with Lost Planet: Extreme Condition, MotorStorm and various others penned in.
On top of that, we'll be looking back at the last year's headlines, giving you the chance to put your views forward for our - I'm sorry, your - Readers' Top 50, and we've also got a special competition lined up, which could see you and friends playing your favourite games on the sort of scale typically reserved for disappointing Star Wars sequels and films about 3D fish.
Look forward to all that, then, as we embark on another voyage across the choppy grammar of the Internet, tacking past the end-of-year marker and into, we pray, calmer waters. Happy New Year, is what I'm getting at. Stick around.