Right, well, that's it then. It's going to be one of those times where I report the facts, tell the truth, and then the entire internet will come round my house and break my kneecaps.
You might remember playing the original Gunstar Heroes on your Megadrive. And you might well be carrying a trouser-torch for it to this very day, determined that it was the greatest moment of your entire life, and that this had nothing to do with the fact that you were thirteen. And if that's you, don't bother reading. You're going to buy the GBA version anyway, and you're going to think anyone whose eyes manage to penetrate the new robe-code of this emperor is a despicable idiot. Fine, fine, I'm an idiot. Move along.
Gunstar Future Heroes is this: less than an hour long.