Lalaland Comments

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  • Pro Super Smash Bros. player dumped by sponsor after "molesting" woman while she tried to sleep

  • Lalaland 18/07/2016

    Yeesh woman gets molested by a dude she thought was her friend and now she has to defend not abandoning him in the street instead, fucks sake. Well done VikkiKitty, getting the cops involved is a scary decision that will protect others from this asshole.

    Oh yeah booze is never an excuse, never. Drunken scumbags are just as scummy while sober, they're just more cunning then.
    Reply +47
  • How to fix the shooter campaign? Dig in

  • Lalaland 08/07/2016

    Re:Battlefield 1 I'm hoping the campaign doesn't focus on one theatre of that war, in general WW1 is seen as Flander's Fields and thats it. The global nature of the conflict and how it killed millions in Africa, the Middle East the Eastern Front is often lost in the horrors of mud, trenches and barbed wire. I'm not expecting the single player in BF1 to be good let alone great but if it at least teaches people that it was a truly global conflict that would be worthwhile Reply +1
  • Exposed YouTube star says sorry you didn't realise he owned gambling site he promoted

  • Lalaland 07/07/2016

    I can only imagine the lawyer's reaction to that video...

    TmarTn: 'Hey law dudes, I just posted a video to my community that lays it all out, not sure I even need you any more'
    2 minutes past with nothing but vague strangled sounds over the sound of the video
    Lawyer: 'Delete that, buy a roll of duct tape and keep wrapping your head with it until the noise stops'
    TmarTn: 'No dude you don't understand my fam...'
    Lawyer: 'Shut up, shut up, SHUT UP!'
    Reply +10
  • Steam warns users against gambling site after YouTube stars discovered as owners

  • Lalaland 04/07/2016

    @cowell Well I think the lack of counter examples says rather a lot about the ethical gulf between 'Dude who wants to get paid for his YT followers' and 'website with actual legal advice'.

    I love how he outright lied to his followers in his video as if they'd take his word over the notarised legal filings he made to set his company up. How much contempt does he harbour for his fans?

    Also how long until we realise that this gambling behaviour is a key part of Valve's business model?
    Reply +34
  • Why Nintendo fans are excited about a just-revealed Pokémon

  • Lalaland 10/02/2016

    Yes, yes it is Reply -1
  • Metal Gear Solid 5 has shipped 6m units

  • Lalaland 30/01/2016

    @L_A_G True but I would argue that still shows worrying signs of not understanding their market as well as their competitors if they've lost 20% YoY. Of course absent info on how the overall pachinko market is doing it's hard to make that judgement. Yano research has numbers for 2014 YoY of a 6% decline which matches the general reports of a steady decline in that market. If the overall pachinko market had declined by 20% YoY in 2015 I think I would have seen those results bubble up to the top of Google Reply +1
  • Lalaland 29/01/2016

    The company's Pachinko and pachislot (slot machine) revenue decreased slightly year-over-year from ¥10.1bn to ¥8.2bn (emphasis added)
    A 20% revenue decline YoY is very far from a slight decline in fact that level of drop is more commonly followed by adjectives like 'catastrophic', 'severe' or 'serious'
    Reply +45
  • I have to break Fallout 4 to finish it

  • Lalaland 20/01/2016

    Wow the top comments are all more apologies for Bethesda's broken Gamebryo/Creation crap? Quelle surprise.

    I find it hilarious that Bethesda's crappy gfx and engine tech get's a pass because their familiarity with the ancient tools is the only way to realise these games but their seeming inability to eliminate the crappy scripting bugs despite using the same tech for 10+ years is a result of the 'complexity' of new platforms.

    We gave Bethesda a pass on crappy quality control for years so it's hardly surprising they don't really try that hard (remember the backwards dragons in Skyrim?)

    To be frank though my biggest problem with FO4 is it's crappy, awful plot and largely terrible characterisation (excepting Nick). That is why like WYP I've stopped the game even if unlike him it's not a glitch but indifference that stopped my play through.
    Reply +4
  • Assassin's Creed Syndicate: Jack the Ripper DLC review

  • Lalaland 23/12/2015

    @Archronos You know for an actually useful perspective that none of those people ever existed? The Ripper's victims, and I can't believe I have to say this, were REAL PEOPLE! Reply +3
  • Lalaland 22/12/2015

    It's all about the Orange Crème really though :D Same here in Dublin it's only the smaller independent shops that seem to stock them Reply 0
  • Lalaland 22/12/2015

    @MattEvansC3 This would have been a thousand times more interesting and revealed something about Victorian London. Spring Heeled Jack was depicted in myriad ways from a human with gadgets (literally sprung heels) to a demon. No-one knows about Spring Heeled Jack though today so Ubisoft took the low road and crafted a DLC around an actual murderer Reply +1
  • Lalaland 22/12/2015

    @BigOrkWaaagh You know it's something I find myself wondering about. The murderer's POV thing is very hard to pull off and works better in novels because you can communicate the thought process. Videogames rarely manage to get across thought process in the way that novels can and certainly AC as a series is even worse than the average game for that.

    When most other forms of fiction go in for the depiction of a serial killer they tend to focus on entirely fictive murderers (Silence of The Lambs, Dexter, etc) as you don't have the messy reality of actual victims. Note that those two examples generally focus on unsympathetic victims who 'deserve it'. In most of the novels I've read where the killer is not the central focus as in the earlier examples the point is to get across how different their view of the world is from the protagonists and that of their victims.

    This DLC seems to be trying to have it's cake and eat it, there has been so much fantastical bollocks talked about 'who the Ripper really is' that we forget he really existed and murdered real people. To take someone who sole claim to fame is that they went around butchering women and try and re-contextualise them as part of your game fiction is gross to me (as indeed is the majority of the whole 'Who was The Ripper' industry). He was a disturbed individual who murdered vulnerable women.

    The game doesn't really engage with the realities of 19th century prostitution either. Child prostitution was a disturbingly common activity and the spectacle of whole generations of women trapped in the same cycle of exploitation isn't dealt with here. Instead as in the dodgy representation of slavery in the Black Flag DLC they become another sort of prize to be rescued or recovered.

    Also the 'Shame Meter' should be 2015 'Press X to Give Condolences' moment. 19th century men would have felt no shame at being paraded in front of people they considered beneath them at all. If Evie dragged them back to their social circle perhaps the idea might have worked but as implemented not at all
    Reply +3
  • Lalaland 22/12/2015

    @BigOrkWaaagh Not really to be honest the whole reason the DLC exists is because some whom the press dubbed 'The Ripper' murdered 5 women in Whitechapel. It's impossible to treat the victims with respect while also trading off the dark glamour that has built up around their murderer.

    Why they felt the need to go even further and let you be The Ripper I'll never fathom. The fact that it's been excluded from pre-launch publicity entirely leads me to believe that someone from outside the studio saw that and went 'WTF?!? Bury this, no-one is to say a word and we may survive'.

    Why even try and contextualise his crimes or worse try and tie the senseless butchery into your awful game plot? It just baffles me on every level and I'm even more surprised it's been so rarely called out. You can't claim to treat the victims with respect while also allowing you to play as their killer.
    Reply -7
  • Lalaland 22/12/2015

    @NienNunb Completely agree.

    Maybe I read too many of those 'True Detective' magazines as a kid but the thought of playing as The Ripper nauseates me. What next we'll discover Ed Gein was chasing an Piece of Eden the whole time? John Wayne Gacy dressed as a clown in tribute to his Templar forefathers in the Commeddia dell'Arte?

    It's the exploitation of a murder victims for the cheapest of thrills. For all the claims that the game respects women in prostitution the entire premise is based off someone who literally eviscerated them. Fuck this DLC.
    Reply -9
  • SXSW considers harassment conference after pulling game panels over threats of violence

  • Lalaland 28/10/2015

    The 'Save Point' was literally dreamed up on r/KotakuInAction in a post with the GG hashtag in the title. It was a GG panel hosted by folks who regularly use the tag in social media to promote themselves let's not pretend it was anything but. Reply +4
  • Here's the Halo Master Chief Swarovski Helmet

  • Lalaland 27/10/2015

    Swarovski - Persuading People to Pay Too Much for Glass for 100+ years!

    Seriously call me when it's at least a semi-precious mineral
    Reply +9
  • Takeshi Kitano is starring in the new Yakuza

  • Lalaland 29/09/2015

    This is hilarious given that most Japanese folk I've met (a small sample admittedly) know him for his comedy and variety shows. His cinema is hugely popular overseas but it's violence seems to relegate it to obscurity in Japan. Goddammit Sega I want this so bad, if anyone fancies seeing Takeshi Kitano in a US film try 'Brother' from 2000 as it's a pretty good yarn and a lot less obtuse than some of his Japanese stuff (worse his early releases have terrible subs). Reply +2
  • In Metal Gear Solid 5, stealth doesn't always mean silent

  • Lalaland 23/09/2015

    @BlinkyB Or the even cruder cludge of 'if grenade moving, visibility = 100%'. I can't say whether my speculation is correct of course having not worked on the game just that anything that involves probes is expensive and usually avoided at all costs (especially probing alpha effects like smoke). It just seems that way from how the guards react in not seeing the jeep and commenting on smoke that isn't there yet.

    They might but I can see them choosing not to as any fix may take too much time and it's kind of hilarious rather than game breaking in the same way tapping iddqd into Doom broke that game. It is almost a super power but it's so obviously ridiculous the player has already effectively stopped caring about game systems.
    Reply +2
  • Lalaland 23/09/2015

    @FuzzyDuck @varsas Odds are the game isn't doing probes to test visibility instead there is a radius around the grenade that marks any object inside as 'invisible'. The gfx system that produces the smoke is separate from the actual function and is affected by the motion of the jeep, thus while in motion the jeep is naked and free of smoke but the game acts as if it's completely wreathed in it.

    It's not a glitch as such (the system is functioning correctly) just a limitation of the way visibility probes work, a fully accurate system would eat way too many cpu cycles.
    Reply +2
  • Don't hold your breath for GTA5 story DLC

  • Lalaland 16/09/2015

    @mechajin Yup as someone who dropped more than I'd care to admit in WoT it can be surprisingly easy to rationalise 'just €5 more' Reply +1
  • So, Mr Kojima, do we feel "ashamed" over Quiet?

  • Lalaland 04/09/2015

    Great article, entirely unsurprised the reason was laughable shite and worse self contradictory after all how come I didn't have to stare at The Ends wrinkly arse in MGS3? He was sunlight powered too Reply +13
  • PewDiePie talks money

  • Lalaland 08/07/2015

    He's a nice guy, early on he was a bit of dick with the screaming 'rape' and what not. He grew up produced a video going 'yeah I was a dick but I've grown' and held to that by building a genuinely welcoming community. Fair play to him

    Still insanely jealous though ;p
    Reply 0
  • Batman: Arkham Knight's leaderboards aren't working on PS4

  • Lalaland 26/06/2015

    'Not the netcode we need, the netcode we deserve'

    Búla bus Wesley top subbing right there!
    Reply +2
  • Destiny: The Taken King director apologises, Collector's Edition content will now be sold separately

  • Lalaland 25/06/2015

    Keep pushing them on the £40 issue EG they've somehow turned this into a debate on chuffing emotes. Reply +33
  • Destiny: The Taken King director defends £40 expansion price tag

  • Lalaland 22/06/2015

    Top work Tom, the frustration I feel at seeing Bungie blithely wittering on about 'content' and 'value' when outside of their shooting mechanic everything else is a mess is just off the scales. The story is hot disjointed, garbage with the HoW only standing out by comparison to what came before. The meta gear levelling game is a lot more straight forward in some ways but not others because hey it's Bungie!

    The siege mentality in that place makes Mourinho look like an amateur 'the world is against us but if we just keep repeating the gospel according to Bungie they will follow'

    tldr: €30 or piss off Bungie
    Reply +15
  • MGS5's seedy Quiet figure has squeezable boobs

  • Lalaland 11/05/2015

    Top job that subs ed, Metal Gear Squalid I'm dying over here Reply +3
  • The MMOne is a three-axis Virtual Reality chair attached to a crane

  • Lalaland 13/04/2015

    This thing will cost thousands if not tens of thousands, heavy lifting hydraulics ain't cheap. Damn cool all the same but a toy for the ultra rich or ultra dedicated only like those super sweet looking cockpit setups you see online. Reply +3
  • No, Battlefield Hardline does not contain ghastly DRM

  • Lalaland 26/03/2015

    @wyp100 Oh it is but on the other hand I could install a non-Origin title on as many PCs in 24 hours as I wanted. Given that I have to be logged into Steam/Uplay/Origin to play my games what's the point in restricting install counts?

    @penhalion I think it was 5 Hardware ID hashes in 24 hours it was just that the author of the article had changed their gfx card 5 times, 5 different PCs would have the same effect
    Reply +7
  • Lalaland 26/03/2015

    @DwarfyP Quoting the original author there, I think they both suck but Origin DRM is enforcing a policy that Steamworks DRM doesn't in this case so for his purposes it really is more ghastly Reply +1
  • Lalaland 26/03/2015

    So it's not that Hardline has 'ghastly DRM' but rather that Origins is 'ghastly DRM'?

    Seems not too bad if it's a rolling 24 hour window but still a nice reminder that Steam/Origin/Uplay are all DRM
    Reply +34
  • Dead or Alive 5 tournament soft ban on "over-sexualised" costumes sparks heated debate

  • Lalaland 02/03/2015

    Wow DoA community goes nuts when people point out the game is teenage bullshit when it comes to women's costumes, colour me shocked. Honestly I think the only failure in The HuBBs list is thinking that anyone in the DoA community cares about what others think of it. This game is never going to grow anything but teenage boners, which is a real shame as it is actually quite a fun fighting system and if it wasn't stuffed to the gills with fan service it would be a great intro game. Reply -6
  • Video: Dying Light - Ian and Johnny have an argument

  • Lalaland 06/02/2015

    Did Johnny's arguments really fall back on the old 'you're doing it wrong' school of forum bores? Frankly Ian's arguments seemed far more convincing to me, I've only seen a few videos and it seems the combat goes from 30 hits to kill to 2 with no in between and that voice acting and script are dire. Reply 0
  • Telltale's Game of Thrones plagued by save bug on Xbox One

  • Lalaland 06/02/2015

    I think we need to stop giving Telltale a pass on their tech issues, this issue of save wiping bugs has been a thing for years combined with their shonky engine is no longer good enough. They can't claim to be ingenues at this any more this is what the 5th or 6th title on this tech and it still has engine perf. issues even on PC. It's especially galling to me because I like their output but I never buy until the last episode as you've a better chance of getting a working piece of software then.

    Do Telltale even bother pretending to care about this stuff any more?
    Reply +35
  • Dying Light dev reveals 3D-printable zombie bikini figurine

  • Lalaland 15/01/2015

    The fuck Techland? Jesus what is it with their female zombie torso fetish? Reply -4
  • Games of 2014: Destiny

  • Lalaland 26/12/2014

    Great article Tom that sums up my own feelings, enjoyed the grind but got pissed off when Bungie hit the reset with TDB. As an aside I feel Bungie's communications have been awful, I actually feel for Deej as he's the the tip of the spear on this.
    The weekly updates have been either full of fluff or vague non-commital responses. When the exotic reset was announced the subsequent update said "Your feedback is clear: The time you have invested in your stuff should be respected" yet the system launched as described and is as disrespectful to my time as expected, yet since then nothing. I just can't be arsed regrinding from scratch the kit I've already put dozens of hours into levelling, especially with the strong suspicion it will be reset again with the next expansion.
    Get your shit together Bungie.
    Reply +2
  • Alien vs. Predator (2000) free on GOG until Friday

  • Lalaland 15/10/2014

    AVP 2000 is the best AvP, my hope for Alien: Isolation is that gives me that fear that the Marine segments did back in the day. All tooled up and still just a walking target for the other big bads, get this game and learn to love the powerlessness. The Alien sections were ace too, with a neat life cycle story, man I loved eating me some humans, Predator was the weakest campaign IMO but for €0.00/£0.00/$0.00 what are you waiting for! Reply +10
  • Sleeping Dogs follow-up Triad Wars is a PC online game

  • Lalaland 22/09/2014

    Boooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!! Reply +5
  • Microsoft UK confirms it is behind cheeky Destiny fragrance ad

  • Lalaland 05/09/2014

    +1 to you MS, I love this good natured 'cheeky' advertising Reply -6
  • Editor's blog: A brief note about "GamerGate"

  • Lalaland 02/09/2014

    Couldn't agree more this whole thing has at it's root a child like fear of criticism held by some gamers. I'm a gamer and have identified as such for years yet as I've grown older and started to look at the other media I've enjoyed I found myself wondering why my favourite form of media did not evolve alongside those others. Even HL2 is not much more than 'shoot mans, go here' but it at least had good writing. All too many of the games I enjoy have all the sophistication of the film 'Commando'. I enjoy them immensely, much as I do Commando, but I wouldn't be pulling that out of my BluRay collection if someone were to ask me 'prove that action films can be more than stuff blowing up'.

    When did people get so damn attached to the label gamer that they feel targeted by articles ridiculing the label? I support a whole bunch of positions that are far from universally popular but I've never felt threatened by criticism of them and certainly not so threatened as to believe that my only response is to abuse someone online. The overwhelming feel of this whole conversation is one of 'playing the man not the ball', a sense that because some are inexplicably threatened by people pointing out that there aren't a lot of female characters that go beyond the virgin/whore/victim archetypes in games they spend all day searching for 'moral' weakness. Every major figure in history would crumble under such scrutiny, MLK was unfaithful, Churchill ordered chemical weapon attacks against the Kurds, etc, etc.
    Reply +8
  • The worst games I've ever played, by Ellie Gibson

  • Lalaland 28/08/2014

    Boooo!!! Will miss Ellie's sense of fun and humour but most of all her seeming imperviousness to hype and BS. Good luck in the future! Reply +3
  • "The transformation was painful. We paid the price"

  • Lalaland 08/08/2014

    The entitlement on display from Cervat is mind boggling here, you are not entitle to 'delay' payments to staff and expect them to be cool with this. You don't get to whine about 'loyalty' when you fail in your contractual obligations to pay people. There is just no sense this guy is even capable of conceiving that any of this might be the result of strategic missteps or hubris. The US market is one of the most heavily studied for costs on earth, how did they get their sums so badly wrong? Reply +17
  • Video: The flattest performances by Hollywood actors in games

  • Lalaland 10/07/2014

    David Duchovny in XIII, I honestly feared he was slipping into a coma while recording the lines Reply +8
  • Editor's blog: I am sexist

  • Lalaland 19/06/2014

    [Bertie edit. Understand what you're saying but it won't help the discussion.] Reply 0
  • Lalaland 19/06/2014

    It's a common misreading that I myself suffered from "Bigotry = Being an Asshole ergo I am no bigot because I am a 'nice' guy". There is a lot of unchallenged assumptions and opinions that we inherit from our past, it's only when I've been challenged on these by friends that I've realised "damn that was stupid/hurtful/hateful". Growing as a person doesn't happen by teaching to others it happens by learning lessons from others.

    All that being said our desire to see ourselves and our world view as righteous means that when someone comes in suggesting an alternate view we kick against it. The internet allows us to kick all the harder as it's analogous to being in a mob, we're all anonymous shouting abuse at other anonymous people. Twitter has allowed that vitriolic BS to spill over into direct messaging in a way that e-mail never allowed which is why 'internet hate' is a thing for the wider world now.
    Reply +18
  • Forza Horizon 2 runs at 1080p 30fps on Xbox One

  • Lalaland 05/06/2014

    Can't wait for the mental backflips of MS fans who decried Drive Club 1080p@30fps and the Sony fans who championed DC 1080p@30fps explain how this 'proves' XB1 is grossly underpowered.

    Loving 'dem console warz
    Reply -2
  • Video: Let's Replay Morrowind

  • Lalaland 12/05/2014

    @SuffolkGooner Yeah the feeling of actually being in a foreign place was completely lost in both Oblivion and Skyrim but especially the latter. I found myself short handing the Empire as 'lazy, inept despots' and Nords as 'racists' within two lines of dialogue. In Morrowind I'm still not quite sure how all the houses relate to one another but I'm happy with that as I know the answer is there I just need to find the right NPC to illuminate me. Part of me suspects the cost of VO work is the culprit here but I've always wondered why these games don't just use 'Simlish' and text? Reply +11
  • Evolve community manager fired after Twitter racism controversy

  • Lalaland 03/05/2014

    @dirtysteve You are not wrong there, the key thing is that they haven't been caught yet or represent federations that are more like personal fiefdoms. That's not to say the NBA is a bastion of responsive democracy, prior to the press conference no-one was expecting such a strong reaction from them. Someone has to step up to the mark first though and I can only commend them. As for FIFA I'm pretty sure I'll be riding my personal starship to work before they're anything but a pack of gougers. Reply 0
  • Lalaland 02/05/2014

    Yet another person confusing the right to say stupid and bigoted things and the desire to be immune from the social consequences. It wasn't the state that fired him from the NBA it was the NBA not wanting the public backlash of having a raving bigot in their midst. Reply +3
  • Does Watch Dogs deliver on its early promise?

  • Lalaland 23/04/2014

    @goggyturk That's reasonable I suppose I am being pretty harsh. I guess I interpreted EG publishing of Rab Florence's article on the VGAs as a signal that EG was going to start asking hard questions of their own industry. The complete lack of comment on the whole Ubisoft/Nexus 7 debacle suggests to me that they felt the heat from UK libel risk with the VGAs and have shrunk from this story now. Completely understandable as UK libel law is so stacked against the defendant it's farcical but disappointing to me none the less.

    Edit: I commented in reply to Goggyturk before reading Tom's reply above mine, I'll leave it here for the record but my position has changed on reading Tom's reply.

    I can understand the human reaction and social awkwardness of being placed in that position while on a hosted trip and understand why Tom felt unable to refuse. In the end your post is exactly what I was hoping to hear from EG on the whole matter. These statements and the excellent articles and news output are why I regard EG as the premiere gaming website available today.
    Reply +1
  • Lalaland 23/04/2014

    @goggyturk Meals are one of those grey area things but I regard meals as being a reasonable accomadation expense given that Paris was a venue chosen by Ubisoft. The difference is that a tablet is a tangible good being gifted that has the potential to influence past the occasion.

    I'm reluctant to go too far down into a discussion of client entertainment as my only point in using the FCPA was to provide a baseline for discussion. The FCPA provides a nice base for discussing what actions can and cannot be construed as attempts to influence foreign public officials. In my example we can substitute journalists for public officials and see that the fact of paying for travel, meals and accommodation is not in itself problematic. Those same rules though would frown upon the gifting of a $200 device for personal use, while being fine with a t-shirt or cheap pen. I choose to equate journalists with public officials as both are in some ways working on behalf of the public, one spending public funds wisely, the other truthfully reporting what they saw.

    I don't think EG were influenced in any way by their acceptance of the gift but I do feel it breaches journalistic ethics to have done so. The stupid sculpted figures, the daft RC toys and the other directly gaming related junk is of no real value to anybody. A $200 dollar tablet is and represents a frankly demeaning move on behalf of Ubisoft that I would have expected EG to call out in an article or news item. Not even Ubisofts apology for handing out the devices has made the front page. This is a really bad way of handling a situation like this.
    Reply -2