Keresky Comments

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  • Bungie on the Destiny level cap, raids and game size

  • Keresky 21/08/2014

    @witchdrash Sadly, that sounds about accurate. Oh well. Reply 0
  • Keresky 21/08/2014

    @Lunastra78 Looking forward to picking up the inevitable Game of the Year edition second-hand in a year or two. I go second-hand with all Activision games anyway, but the clueless marketing and shitty treatment of Marty O'Donnell kind of cemented it. Reply +7
  • Keresky 21/08/2014

    "If I'm honest with you, it blew my mind, because it's the biggest game we've ever made."

    What did the Halos consist of, two rooms and a corridor each?

    Seriously, tho': I hate to break it to Bungie, but if you're going to make a first-person looter and offer a game world that's barely a fraction the size of Borderlands with significantly undercooked progression mechanics, you shouldn't be surprised if people come away less than impressed. You're not just competing against yourselves here.
    Reply +39
  • Watch Dogs is Ubisoft's last mature game for Wii U

  • Keresky 19/08/2014

    @BuryTheHammer This is why the Wii U has no third party support, and why I will never buy a Wii U. No sense in spending money on a console that only gets the latest annualized rehashes of the same four franchises Nintendo has been hefting around since the N64/GameCube days. Reply -2
  • Keresky 19/08/2014

    @spamdangled If so, bear in mind that their "highest-performing title" also didn't shift enough copies to justify a sequel. By that logic, the correct position would be to pull all support, period. Reply +3
  • Keresky 19/08/2014

    @simsini Do we have a more credible source for that 700K figure beyond VGChartz? I stopped paying attention to them a while ago because a lot of their numbers seem to be based on fudging and guesswork, especially after NPD stopped making their sales metrics available to the general public.

    Bear in mind 700K means ZombiU had a better than 10% attach rate, considering less than 7 million WiiUs were shipped (not sold) as of end of June.

    Also bear in mind that ACIV on XBOne was just a port of an existing game, whereas ZombiU was created from scratch. The breakeven point for the two is going to be rather different as a result.
    Reply +7
  • Rise of the Tomb Raider exclusive to Xbox One

  • Keresky 12/08/2014

    @Kremlik This. Precisely this. After pissing and moaning about the actually pretty decent sales of the previous game, what earthly logic is there in making the sequel exclusive to the console that's being significantly outsold by its nearest competitor?

    The only way this decision could be any more moronic is if they'd decided to make it a Wii U exclusive. (I'm looking at you, Platinum.)
    Reply +2
  • BioShock 1 announced for iPhone and iPad

  • Keresky 04/08/2014

    @uncleniccius I believe Ken Levine mentioned that the Vita game was supposed to be more of a Final Fantasy Tactics-esque affair. There was a news story a few days back about it. Reply +6
  • Looks like Final Fantasy creator Sakaguchi's next game is Terra Battle

  • Keresky 27/06/2014

    Having Sakaguchi doing mobile games is like seeing Spielberg reduced to directing five-minute viral videos for YouTube. Pathetic. Reply +7
  • Have mobile graphics finally surpassed last-gen console?

  • Keresky 26/06/2014

    Yeah, good luck making games look like that when you're pitching to a market that considers Flappy Bird the cutting edge of entertainment software and won't pay more than two quid for a title. Reply +2
  • Mario Kart 8 review

  • Keresky 15/05/2014

    @DizzyCriminal "When they announce a new Zelda, Metroid or Starfox game... the U is only next gen console that's offering something new."

    Something new like, uh, the latest, modestly updated installments in franchises that are almost 30 years old in places?

    I own both a 3DS and a Wii, but the only thing the Wii U offers at the moment is HD versions of the same titles Nintendo has been milking for years. The last time they brought out an actual new property was over a decade ago, so let's stop pretending they're seriously innovating anywhere other than that silly, pointless tablet controller gimmick.
    Reply -15
  • Keresky 15/05/2014

    @memeroot Or maybe the world isn't interested in an underpowered console whose only semi-decent games are uninspired retreads of the same Nintendo properties that have been kicking around for decades. If you're not interested in Mario, there's precious little reason to own a Wii U. Reply -14
  • 3D Realms reveals PC and PS4 action-RPG Bombshell

  • Keresky 15/05/2014

    You know, this looks like a modestly talented art student's final modeling assignment. On those merits, this looks OK.

    As a game trailer, though? Excuse me while I laugh.
    Reply +3
  • Bound By Flame review

  • Keresky 13/05/2014

    @menage You know what else wouldn't go amiss? Artists designing female characters that don't dress like hookers. Reply +3
  • Nintendo slumps to another annual loss after dismal Wii U sales

  • Keresky 08/05/2014

    To be fair, launching yet another underpowered console with a gimmicky controller might have worked out if they weren't pitching to actual gamers this time. But after aggressively alienating the hardcore crowd with the Wii, it was going to take a lot more to win them back. Showing up with hardware marginally better than the last generation of consoles isn't going to do the trick, especially if you don't have the triple-A titles to back it up.

    With the third parties fleeing for the exits, Nintendo really needed to step up their game on the software side. Problem is, what's there displays Activision-like levels of creative failure: yet another New Super Mario Bros game, yet another Smash Bros., yet another Mario Kart, yet another Pikmin, and an HD remake of the least-loved Zelda game since those CD-I atrocities. Seriously? How about a new Zelda, a non-crappy Metroid, or - god forbid - a new franchise entirely? These annualized retreads of Nintendo's old glories might be great for the diehards, but aren't going to convince the general gaming public to hop on board a rapidly sinking ship.
    Reply 0
  • "We're not evil villains building an empire"

  • Keresky 14/04/2014

    Also, can we stop referring to these twats as "developers"? That's like calling bankrobbers "entrepreneurs". Reply +4
  • Keresky 14/04/2014

    "Games Guru"? I guess it looks better on a business card than "Ripoff-In-Chief" or "Clonemaster". Reply +2
  • Firaxis announces Sid Meier's Civilization: Beyond Earth

  • Keresky 13/04/2014

    I was at the panel where they announced this, and they gave a few details about what to expect:

    - It's based on the Civ V engine, so it'll be hex-based. The planet will be randomly generated each time and contain existing alien fauan.
    - Like SMAC, there's various factions with particular benefits. The two mentioned in the presentation were the Pan-Asian Collective and a group the designers referred to as "Space Google".
    - Instead of a tech tree, there's a tech web.
    - In addition, there's three 'affinities' that you gain as you progress through the game and make tech choices. Harmony is about harnessing the alien fauna and changing your own genetics to match. Purity is about preserving the human essence, and sports heavy firepower. The third (whose name escapes me) is about embracing the true potential of technology, and uses robotics, nanotechnology, and suchlike.
    - There's a "first contact" victory condition - apparently, there's an intelligent alien race that left traces of its existence on the world.
    Reply +18
  • Human Element's episodic Ouya prequel has been canned

  • Keresky 26/03/2014

    @grassyknoll Wasn't he just a glorified marketing guy at IW anyway? Reply 0
  • Yaiba: Ninja Gaiden Z review

  • Keresky 21/03/2014

    The developers of Turning Point: Fall of Liberty and Legendary: The Box live up to their track record. Oh well. Reply +5
  • Mad Catz Mojo review

  • Keresky 23/02/2014

    Crap hardware aside, the biggest problem with microconsoles is the fact that they're relying on mobile gaming - real gaming's inbred, meth-cooking cousin twice removed - for content. At this point, investing in developers is as critical as investing in hardware. Otherwise, punters are paying 200 quid for the privilege of playing Flappy Bird on an HDTV. Reply +7
  • Unreal Tournament retrospective

  • Keresky 23/02/2014

    Just a fantastic game in every sense of the word, and a real paradigm shift for what a multiplayer FPS could be. I felt a little sorry for id, to be honest - Q3A wasn't a terrible game, but just seemed utterly half-assed in comparison to the wealth of maps and gameplay modes Epic brought to the table. Reply +1
  • Ken Levine discusses BioShock Infinite: Burial at Sea Episode 1's ending

  • Keresky 16/11/2013

    @vert1go Don't kid yourself. Some of us actually appreciate it when a game attempts to tell a more sophisticated story then "ARMY MANS SHOOTS ALL THE TERRORISTS" or "OMG MARIO THE PRINCESS HAS BEEN KIDNAPPED AGAIN CAN YOU BELIEVEEEE IT??"

    Don't like it? Don't play it. You sound like you'd probably be happier teabagging some 14-year-old's virtual corpse while calling him a "homo" over voicechat.
    Reply +10
  • Batman: Arkham Origins launches with half the sales of Arkham City

  • Keresky 28/10/2013

    I'll admit I'm waiting for a price drop. The switch in developers, driven by a clear-cut attempt to turn the Arkham series into a CoD-style annualized franchise, didn't sit right with me, and I've got far too much of a backlog at this point. Reply +2
  • The strongest next-gen line-up from the unlikeliest source

  • Keresky 28/10/2013

    So, let's get this straight. The Wii U is the console to beat this winter because it has...

    - Yet another Mario rehash, the latest installment in a franchise that's basically become Call of Duty with mushrooms;
    - Ports of, uh, Assassin's Creed and Call of Duty;
    - A marginally enhanced remake of a widely reviled last-gen action RPG;
    - A marginally enhanced remake of a somewhat less reviled last-gen action RPG;
    - Pikmin;
    - Another gimmicky Wii party game;
    - ZombiU;
    - The Wonderful 101;

    I'm sorry, but that's a pretty sad lineup. The PS4/XBone launch slate isn't great either, but the Wii U's been out for a year. If this is the best it can muster, Nintendo's in genuine trouble.
    Reply -12
  • Ouya founder Julie Uhrman on the little box that could

  • Keresky 26/09/2013

    @okraM "PR disasters aside, I like it more than my ps3 and it was 300 cheaper."

    Watch for okraM's next post, where he claims that the upcoming Angry Birds cart racer "makes GTA V look like amateur hour" and asks, "Who needs Destiny when you've got Where's My Water?"
    Reply +3
  • GameStop to restock out of print vintage titles

  • Keresky 14/08/2013

    Crooks, plain and simple. If there's demand, do the decent thing and just reprint the damn thing at sufficient quantities to satisfy customer demand, then sell at MSRP. This is nothing more than blatant scalping by some of the gaming industry's most crooked players. Reply 0
  • Final Fantasy 12's cancelled follow-up revealed in artwork, video

  • Keresky 12/08/2013

    @Acquiescence Did we play the same game? Because the XII I played had a beautifully designed and lived-in world, fantastic script, and a real sense of place and history that's been sorely lacking from the rest of the series. Reply +5
  • GoatUp 2 review

  • Keresky 24/07/2013

    "...even as he's demonstrated increasing frustration at the lack of attention his games have been getting."

    Maybe if his games didn't look like they'd parachuted in from 1983, more people would be inclined to buy them. I realize this visual style is his "thing", but I can't see the average iOS consumer looking at a screenshot of this and immediately hitting the purchase button, no matter how great the actual gameplay is.
    Reply +4
  • Plagiarised versions of Magnetized made it onto XBLIG, Google Play

  • Keresky 18/07/2013

    I'd swear that the amount of cloning and outright game theft in the mobile/independent gaming industry has reached epidemic proportions. Reply +7
  • Superbly animated metroidvania Legend of Iya takes to Kickstarter

  • Keresky 18/07/2013

    Nice visuals, but that music is wank. Reply +2
  • American McGee cancels failing OZombie Kickstarter

  • Keresky 16/07/2013

    This is actually a much better use of McGee's time and money than trying to capitalize on three of the lamest pop-culture fads of the past five years simultaneously (zombies, steampunk, fairytale reimaginings). Madness Returns was wank from a gameplay perspective, but beautifully designed. By removing the need for an actual game and just focusing on the visuals, Spicy Horse are playing to their strengths. Reply +3
  • Deus Ex: The Fall review

  • Keresky 10/07/2013

    A sub-standard mobile game from the publisher that gave us Final Fantasy: All the Bravest? Shocking.

    In all seriousness: they should have just bitten the bullet and made this a 3DS/Vita title instead of trying to shoehorn a real game into a control method designed for Twitter updates and web browsing.
    Reply +25
  • The Neverhood creators launch Kickstarter for spiritual successor Armikrog

  • Keresky 17/06/2013

    Fun fact: Doug TenNapel is a gay-bashing homophobe and right-wing nutbar. Good to see the Kickstarter heading for failure. Everybody who supports this degenerate should be ashamed of themselves. Reply 0
  • Used game sales can be limited by making better games, Nintendo's Reggie Fils-Aime says

  • Keresky 15/06/2013

    @darth_paul Oh, you mean franchises that actually try to push the technical envelope and take advantage of next-generation hardware instead of cranking out product that's almost indistinguishable from a GameCube game? ::sigh:: Nintendo brings fantastic gameplay to the table, but good god, let's not pretend that something like Pikmin 3 took more time and effort than, say, accurately digitizing hundreds of distinct athletes year after year, or trying to motion capture a dog. Reply -4
  • Keresky 14/06/2013

    Annualized games, Reggie? You mean incremental upgrades to an existing franchise that are barely distinguishable from the previous game in the series? You mean franchises that have gone on for 25 years on the exact same basic gameplay model and are now completely bereft of innovation?

    In other words, you mean Mario Kart, Mario Party, Pokemon, Donkey Kong, and now the New Super Mario Brothers franchise?
    Reply -13
  • Super Smash Bros. for Wii U and 3DS due 2014

  • Keresky 11/06/2013

    @simsini So I guess you're really looking forward to Donkey Kong Country Returns Yet Again, New Super Mario Brothers World Land 3D, Yet Another Mario Party, Mario Kart 5,000,001, and Wind Waker: Marginally Improved Edition. You can whine about annualized gaming all you want, but a hell of a lot more effort goes into each and every one of those franchises than the half-assed drivel Nintendo is populating their underpowered failure of a console with. Reply -13
  • Live: Nintendo Direct E3 Conference

  • Keresky 11/06/2013

    @kinky_mong No need for valium. This stream was sleep-inducing enough already. Reply +1
  • Keresky 11/06/2013

    @simsini I'd rather have wall-to-wall grey textures than yet another goddamned Mario Kart. But given the half-assed hardware they have to work with, I guess you can't blame Nintendo for just re-heating the same old crap. Reply +1
  • Keresky 11/06/2013

    @darkmorgado Are you high? Literally every single goddamned game Nintendo showed was a rehash of an already ancient franchise. Reply +1
  • Keresky 11/06/2013

    Pathetic, but about what I expected from Nintendo: re-heated versions of the same four franchises they've been flogging for about 20+ years. Reply 0
  • Ouya review

  • Keresky 09/06/2013

    @Euronymous Kind of missing the point there, champ. Reply +1
  • Microsoft kills game ownership and expects us to smile

  • Keresky 07/06/2013

    @Stealth20k ...or you could wait and buy a real console with actual games on it. Reply -2
  • Keresky 07/06/2013

    @FireMonkey "You're so negative! Instead of crying about the fact that you were ass-raped, why didn't you mention the fact that your rapist was kind enough to use lube?" Reply +6
  • Keresky 07/06/2013

    @jackmonaghan Then it'll be amusing to see your reaction when Steam shuts down and your entire game collection becomes 100% worthless. Reply +1
  • Murdered: Soul Suspects: a detective in limbo must solve his own murder by interrogating ghosts and influencing the living

  • Keresky 06/06/2013

    Wasn't Airtight also responsible for Quantum Conundrum? Shame. Reply +2
  • Disney ends internal development at LucasArts, shifts to licensing model

  • Keresky 04/04/2013

    Pathetic. Shutting down development on real games in favor of mobile and social gaming is like announcing that you're no longer going to be making $100 million blockbusters because it's cheaper to crank out five-minute-long Flash cartoons. Reply +1
  • Free-to-play Dungeon Defenders 2 announced

  • Keresky 19/03/2013

    Oh, good. Another tower defence game. We don't have nearly enough of those already. Reply -3
  • Square Enix struggling to make money from its console games

  • Keresky 05/02/2013

    Yes, it's amazing how difficult it is to make money when you've given up making real games in favor of wank like All the Bravest. Here's a quick four-step plan to getting your mojo back: 1. Just Cause 3. Give them all the money. You won't regret it. 2. Deus Ex 2. 3. Shut down production of Lightning Returns and pump the resources back into FF Versus XIII. 4. Make nice with Matsuno again and give him FFXV. Reply +2
  • Asteroids and Pong maker Atari files for bankruptcy

  • Keresky 21/01/2013

    @Lord_BeeJee They did bring Nolan Bushnell onto their Board of Directors. But yeah, this is basically Infogrames North America filing bankruptcy to separate itself from Infogrames. Sloppy research, EG. Reply +3