Depression Page 104

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  • MistaGav 14 Oct 2012 15:25:25 90 posts
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    Hi just thought I should make a little comment here as I've been struggling with depression for about 4-6 months now.

    Personally I've found that a counsellor has really helped, just the ability to talk to someone from a neutral perspective is good as well as they ask questions and get me thinking about stuff I've never thought about before.

    I've also found that keeping a diary is a good thing, doesn't have to be updated all the time or every day. Just every so often when you're feeling down and low it's just good to vent and rant in that little space then close the thing down and come back later.
  • MadCaddy13 14 Oct 2012 16:18:08 1,840 posts
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    Nades wrote:
    Hmmm, I have no idea if I have depression or not. Today, I feel amazing! But I bet tomorrow I'll feel shit for NO reason. I don't understand why I seem to go in and out of depression, becuase I'm a very lucky person, great family and friends, who do everything for me (that's without mentioning I have a beautiful gf who is wey outta my league),couldn't ask for a better life to be honest, which is why it worries me that I am like this =S.
    It could be attributed to guilt. I'm kind of in the same boat.
  • SlimSpudly87 22 Oct 2012 15:10:36 72 posts
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    So I'm currently suffering from depression.

    Have been thinking for the several months about ending it all but that's really not the best solution.

    Being made redundant from a high profile company ( I don't want to name names but you gamers will know who) has driven me to point of no return. Depression is hereditary in my family and all ways will be. I had a spell a few years ago when I suffered from anxiety, but nothing like this. I can see my life going no where rapidly and it's quite scary. No friends, no girlfriend no life. So what's the point of being here? Hopefully someone will read this, and if there are people feeling like how I do right now. Your not alone
  • bitch_tits_zero_nine 22 Oct 2012 15:13:05 6,654 posts
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    Hope you get through it. Only thing I can really say is life and moments are transient.
  • SlimSpudly87 22 Oct 2012 15:24:50 72 posts
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    @bitch_tits_zero_nine

    Thanks I hope I do to

    I feel horrific at the moment, best thing when your like this is to tell loved ones how you feel
  • Leolian 22 Oct 2012 15:27:13 1,050 posts
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    I agree. It always feels pointless when depression is active, but it is a symptom of long term issues and, ultimately, chemical imbalances; once the depression lifts all that becomes evident. I'd strongly suggest going to see a councillor, although don't be put off if they don't work at first as it's very much about finding the right person to talk too. Don't be afraid of medication either, if you're not already on any, but use it in combination with some form of talk therapy, and don't self medicate. Good luck buddy!
  • bitch_tits_zero_nine 22 Oct 2012 15:29:16 6,654 posts
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    Yeah it's difficult to do what's best when life feels like quicksand though.

    Like exercise, talking etc. All the things that help are the last things you feel like doing in my experience.

    If you're particularly introspective like me, I find it really difficult to get out of my own head.

    Prozac helped a bit but made me anxious.

    Edited by bitch_tits_zero_nine at 15:30:25 22-10-2012
  • Leolian 22 Oct 2012 15:29:56 1,050 posts
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    Also, don't believe that everyone else is better off than you, that is an illusion too. When you're depressed it feels like everyone else is doing great, but they are often not. Lean on your loved ones to a degree, but, ultimately, you are the only person that can get yourself out of the hole.
  • Leolian 22 Oct 2012 15:32:08 1,050 posts
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    This book helped me loads.
  • Zomoniac 22 Oct 2012 15:37:19 7,402 posts
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    /hugs Spud

    I'm going to the doctor in the morning to try get put back on ADs. What started off as a bit of depression that was keeping me up a bit had led to full on insomnia where I now haven't slept for more than a couple of hours in over a month (actually had a couple of hallucinations now which is getting very scary), which is making the depression so, so much worse. The stupid thing is none of the problems that started it off have really gotten any worse, but this cycle of not sleeping because I'm depressed then being depressed because I can't sleep is making everything seem worse than it is.
  • GiarcYekrub 22 Oct 2012 15:45:50 3,576 posts
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    I feel like everyday is the same, I go to work, do the same thing, no speaking, go home, play xbox, sleep, repeat... its fucking sad when at 30 the highlight of your life is a new episode of Red Dwarf or Doctor Who... I have tried to socialise more the Diana Vickers gig thing was a lame attempt at it but it proved too expensive as did going to football matches... Oh yeah and going out drinking currently just magnifies my feelings of complete and utter empty lonliness, I feel like I'm waiting a new part of my life to begin... it just won't and I'm lingering at the end of the last... oooh deep personal shit on a Monday afternoon, I'm sure it'll bite me in the ass.
  • SlimSpudly87 22 Oct 2012 15:58:08 72 posts
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    I think the worst thing I've done is bottle up how I feel since March.

    I've only just admitted to a close family member today just exactly how I feel.
  • Deleted user 22 October 2012 18:27:34
    SlimSpudly87 wrote:I can see my life going no where rapidly and it's quite scary. No friends, no girlfriend no life. So what's the point of being here?
    This bit certainly resonates with me. Struggle everyday with this really.

    Good luck buddy, is all I can really say. Well done telling your family member, you can't suffer completely on your own.

    @Zom - That sounds shit man. I get a lot of interrupted sleep but never really had insomnia. All the best mate.
  • MistaGav 22 Oct 2012 22:37:10 90 posts
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    SlimSpudly87 wrote:I can see my life going no where rapidly and it's quite scary. No friends, no girlfriend no life. So what's the point of being here?
    I know how you feel as I'm in literally the same situation. No friends, no girlfriend and not much life. Hang in there mate

    I don't know why anymore but I still find myself crying to sleep...
  • MadCaddy13 22 Oct 2012 22:53:48 1,840 posts
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    It can all change in a day guys. Take the good with the bad. All these experiences are part of life. When your out of all the depression and anxiety, insomnia etc you appreciate that you've experienced and have been through it. You learn from it
  • SlimSpudly87 22 Oct 2012 22:54:02 72 posts
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    Thank you for the messages wishing me luck. The road to recovery starts here, it will be tough but if I keep my mind occupied with the things that keep me happy it will be easier.

    If anyone ever wants to talk about anything, drop me a message on here. I'll know exactly how you feel
  • Zomoniac 23 Oct 2012 10:24:02 7,402 posts
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    Been to the doc, back on ADs and some extra strong sleeping pills to go with them. Last time I was put on ADs I felt like it was admission that I'd officially failed at being a person. Fortunately I'm not getting that this time, I know I'm just doing what I have to to get through a difficult patch.
  • glaeken 23 Oct 2012 11:08:24 10,974 posts
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    You don't get a pass or fail grade at the end of life.

    It's just nothingness for eternity in a meaningless universe :)
  • Zomoniac 23 Oct 2012 11:17:08 7,402 posts
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    Heh, true. But that's almost the point. It's entirely meaningless in the grand scheme of things, just enjoy it whilst it's there. If you can't even do that, then that's just a big fail. Or at least that's what was in my head last summer when I went through a very bad spot. This time I'm trying to think of it as a temporary setback.
  • bitch_tits_zero_nine 23 Oct 2012 11:18:22 6,654 posts
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    yep, just a black empty morose abyss so cheer the fuck up :D
  • RabidChild 23 Oct 2012 11:19:48 2,283 posts
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    Zomoniac wrote:
    Last time I was put on ADs I felt like it was admission that I'd officially failed at being a person.
    I had that the first time. Somewhere between that and the third time I had come round to thinking of depression as an illness, like diabetes, and that I needed medication to help. For me, at least, it's comforting thinking about it as an illness to be treated like any other.
  • Deleted user 23 October 2012 11:23:51
    Life isn't about what you don't have and what you aren't doing. It isn't about the failures or tragedies you may have had in your life. It's about enjoying the moment, the anticipation of what's to come and creating your own opportunities.

    Forget about the bad and make yourself try to have some fun, you never know, you might have some by accident and then really start enjoying it.

    Seek help from medical professionals if you need to, accepting help is never a failure.
  • bitch_tits_zero_nine 23 Oct 2012 11:27:35 6,654 posts
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    I guess it can be comforting. My staple mantra is that some other poor fucker has a much worse situation than my own.

    Being rational is difficult though.
  • glaeken 23 Oct 2012 11:33:12 10,974 posts
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    If you live in the western world at this time you are amongst the luckiest humans that have ever lived. Humans have never had it better.

    Of course that does create some issues for some of us as we have a little too much comfort and time to think about shit. No-one who ever got chased by a sabre tooth tiger got depressed Iíll bet.
  • bitch_tits_zero_nine 23 Oct 2012 11:34:35 6,654 posts
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    true
  • Deleted user 23 October 2012 13:28:53
    I bet they got depressed about being chased by a sabre tooth tiger every day! ;D
  • Leolian 23 Oct 2012 13:44:03 1,050 posts
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    RabidChild wrote:
    Zomoniac wrote:
    Last time I was put on ADs I felt like it was admission that I'd officially failed at being a person.
    I had that the first time. Somewhere between that and the third time I had come round to thinking of depression as an illness, like diabetes, and that I needed medication to help. For me, at least, it's comforting thinking about it as an illness to be treated like any other.
    This is the basis of depression. An internal confirmation that you are as useless as you believe yourself (wrongly) to be. Low self esteem is the root of most anxiety and depression. Anxiety comes about when you believe you will be placed in a situation where your fundamental worthlessness will be exposed, depression comes about when you believe it has been exposed. The way around this is to realise that you are not worthless, nor are the bad things you believe about yourself true, and definately not to the extent that most people believe them to be. It takes time and a structured approach, but it does work.

    The whole sabre tooth tiger thing is also true. We are not that evolved from our caveman ancestors, and the same instincts that helped us then, hinder us in the modern age.
  • Deleted user 23 October 2012 16:16:43
    Thanks for the book recommendation Leolian, have downloaded and will give it a read.
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