Childlessness Page 4

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  • FWB 1 Jan 2013 02:25:48 45,574 posts
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    Hope she can't vote here when she gets older, Khanvior.

    But congrats. :)
  • Syrette 1 Jan 2013 02:51:07 44,207 posts
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    What's this about mowgli giving birth to a puppy?

  • Moot_Point 1 Jan 2013 03:28:51 4,594 posts
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    @Syrette It's not natural ;)

    Oh that was the girl talking about her natural purple hair!

    ================================================================================

    mowgli wrote: I thought the 1 married the .2 and founded Islam?

  • Phattso Moderator 1 Jan 2013 03:30:09 13,920 posts
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    I had typed out a fairly lengthy response here (as a late 30s non parent) but since the thread is now about mowgli shitting dogs I just PMd it instead. :)

    I approve of the thread now being about mowgle shitting dogs, by the way.
  • Dirtbox 1 Jan 2013 05:55:22 79,167 posts
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    I believe that smart parents sort of owe it to the world to have kids, just because there are so many brainless fucks out there squirting worthless plaps to societies burden out of their cunt holes with not a single solitary idea of what direction to put them in.

    Also a life without kids is somewhat meaningless in the grand scheme. better to preserve yourself in some fashion and enrich the world than fuck it all off and suck your own dick until you die.

    +1 / Like / Tweet this post

  • Dirtbox 1 Jan 2013 05:57:39 79,167 posts
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    OR are you telling us you don't have any sperm?

    Condolences.

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  • Deleted user 1 January 2013 05:59:16
    Long live Gremmi's wank sock
  • Dirtbox 1 Jan 2013 06:09:37 79,167 posts
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    Outspan.

    +1 / Like / Tweet this post

  • Phattso Moderator 1 Jan 2013 06:13:19 13,920 posts
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    Dirtbox wrote:
    Also a life without kids is somewhat meaningless in the grand scheme. better to preserve yourself in some fashion and enrich the world than fuck it all off and suck your own dick until you die.
    Depending on how far down the path of fatalism you want to walk, life itself is pretty much meaningless in the grand scheme.

    Plenty of ways to enrich the world and leave your mark that don't involve knocking someone up/getting knocked up. My pristine collection of Your Sinclair mags from the 80s for example will be a beacon of light to the generations of the future.
  • localnotail 1 Jan 2013 10:07:52 23,093 posts
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    Psychotext wrote:
    localnotail wrote:
    He was coming round to the idea of having a kid after his sisters had theirs, as did many of my friends. Then his Dad died suddenly, and this seemed to focus his resolve. We set a future date to start trying and stopped worrying about it.
    Oddly enough the death of my parents pushed me completely in the other direction. I couldn't imagine bringing a kid into this world now that they're gone. The idea that my kid would have never got to meet them (and obviously vice-versa) is just soul crushing to me.
    Fair enough, although it makes me sad to think you would deny yourselves the chance of great happiness because of your loss. You know best though.

    I think it was the conversation with his Dad's best mate at the funeral that did sealed it. He said that no matter that his life hadn't turned out how he would've liked (lost his job in the car industry in his late 40s, divorced, overweight, dead at 56), the one thing he was really proud of in his life and had never regretted was his children, they made up for everything else. He still misses his Dad greatly, but I think he was happy to take his advice on this one. And judging by how gushy he got about being a dad last night, it was the right decision for him. She might turn into a nightmare toddler or stroppy teen, but so far she's been a source of daily joy which far outweighs any sacrifices to personal freedom. That might just be the hormones and sleep-deprivation talking though.

    A strange game. The only winning move is not to play.

  • Rusty_M 1 Jan 2013 11:47:30 4,916 posts
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    I don't want to have kids yet. I'm 29 and the other half is 24. She doesn't see herself wanting them either. We're open to the idea that we might want kids in the future, but we currently don't plan on having kids ever.

    To be fair, I think I'm too selfish and self-obsessed to be much of a good father. Kids are alright sometimes, but I can't see them being a major part of my life. In any case, at the moment, our flat is too small and our earnings are too low for parenthood.

    I don't think I'm ready to be a dad, and I don't know if I ever will be. I reckon I'd make a pretty decent uncle figure though!

    The world is going mad. Me? I'm doing fine.
    http://www.twitch.tv/rusty_the_robot
    http://twitter.com/Rusty_The_Robot

  • speedofthepuma 1 Jan 2013 12:03:15 13,320 posts
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    Just about the only thing I have learned is that just about anything I am certain about now I am likely to feel differently about in the future. I look back at my youthful self and laugh at all the things I thought were absolute fact about my hopes and dreams. The only thing that is certain is your viewpoint about everything will change as ou get older.

    I have no idea if you will ever want children, but don't make what could turn out to be a permanent decision now because contraception seems like a bit of a hassle.

    I lurk. If I've spoken to you, I'm either impassioned, or drunk.

  • cubbymoore 1 Jan 2013 12:18:28 36,504 posts
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    Aren't vasectomies reversible? I thought they were.
  • speedofthepuma 1 Jan 2013 12:19:50 13,320 posts
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    Poor success rates, mid 20% or so last time I checked, should be considered irreversible really.

    I lurk. If I've spoken to you, I'm either impassioned, or drunk.

  • elstoof 1 Jan 2013 12:25:55 8,302 posts
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    Dirtbox wrote:
    I believe that smart parents sort of owe it to the world to have kids, just because there are so many brainless fucks out there squirting worthless plaps to societies burden out of their cunt holes with not a single solitary idea of what direction to put them in.

    It's a bit alarming that the dregs of society can plop out dozens like some ride at Thorpe Park and the tab to raise this genetically challenged sector is picked up by the successful few who can barely afford to pay for 1 or 2 of their own with no similar financial assistance.
  • cubbymoore 1 Jan 2013 12:28:20 36,504 posts
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    Ah well then. I personally wouldn't do it because they redirect the sperm out your butt hole.
  • elstoof 1 Jan 2013 12:28:45 8,302 posts
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    cubbymoore wrote:
    Aren't vasectomies reversible? I thought they were.
    They mean reversible in that they turn the outie into an innie.
  • ZuluHero 1 Jan 2013 12:46:20 4,297 posts
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    cubbymoore wrote:
    Aren't vasectomies reversible? I thought they were.
    Yes but low success, One thing though,it's free to get it done but you have to pay to reverse it.
  • Tonka 1 Jan 2013 12:50:46 21,330 posts
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    The idea that not having children equals selfishness is silly. In this day and age I think it's the other way around. Having children is the ultimate indulgence. Sure, once you have them you always play second fiddle so I guess it teaches a valuable lesson in humility.

    If you can read this you really need to fiddle with your forum settings.

  • morriss 1 Jan 2013 12:56:13 71,286 posts
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    Don't have any then.
  • morriss 1 Jan 2013 12:59:03 71,286 posts
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    My actual real opinion is very insulting and unhelpful. But people who say stuff like cleaning up shit and lack of personal freedom makes me want to kill continents and shatter lives.
  • quadfather 1 Jan 2013 13:24:19 13,356 posts
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    meme wrote:
    I know we have a massive raft of parents and whatnot on here, so I figured I'd seek out thoughts and theories about going childless. My wife and I have no desire whatsoever for a child. Literally none. Not even the slightest stirring. To the extent where I'm seriously considering a vasectomy in the near future so we don't have to really bother with birth control anymore.

    I have basically never had any sort of want for a child. Never had a pang of feeling like I need one in my life, never felt broody or anything like that. Not a single one of my lifetime plans have ever factored in or considered children. It just hasn't entered in the equation. To me, the sleepless nights and years and years of having to clean up shit (literally shit) and lack of personal freedom just outweighs the feeling of love and whatnot you'd get from a child. I'll get (and have got) parents telling me that's bullshit and it's all worth it overall and so on and so forth, and if that's the case in their world then I'm immeasurably happy for them. But I just don't see it at all in mine.

    So I'm wondering if there's any others who felt the same way, perhaps in a similar position of being in a marriage where neither partner wants kids. Or even counterpoints beyond just "you don't know until you have one". Do you think an actively childless marriage is selfish? Beneficial? Have you had a marriage strengthened or weakened (perhaps even saved or destroyed) by the inclusion of kids? Eh? Eh?
    I think I'm in the same boat as you. I'm 40, wife is 45. She already has a grown up son who I get on with great when he visits. But that's it - she doesn't want any more, and I could basically copy and paste your second paragraph to sum up how I feel about it. And we're both very happy with our lives.

    I used to think about it more when I was in my 30's and hadn't met my wife yet, but now, I hardly think about it at all. And handing other people's kids back after looking after them for x amount of hours is probably more pleasurable than seeing your own team nick a 1-0 win at 90 minutes.

    Other people in the place where I live have kids obviously, and some have fostered some too - and while I can see why they like it - it's just not for me.

    Not sure about the op though, it's pretty much one way. There's various different types of birth control though, if you haven't gone through them all

    Edited by quadfather at 13:26:55 01-01-2013

    psn quaddy456, Dark Souls tips

  • chopsen 1 Jan 2013 13:27:13 16,281 posts
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    "Kill continents and shatter lives," eh? Guess we can't all have the same sense of perspective and social responsibility as you.
  • mrpon 1 Jan 2013 13:32:26 29,552 posts
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    Personally speaking unless you have time, money and intelligence don't bother. Shame a lot of people don't follow that ethos.

    Give yourself 5 or gig, you're worth it.

  • thelzdking 1 Jan 2013 14:08:46 4,413 posts
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    The problem with children is that the time and effort you put into raising them is disproportionate to the experience you get when you actually put them on the table. The flavour simply isn't superior enough to that of most commonly available animal meats to justify the hard work.
  • morriss 1 Jan 2013 14:14:13 71,286 posts
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    Everything that's wrong with our individualistic, lazy, me-first, spineless, selfish society is encapsulated here.

    Don't have kids, that's fine. But not wanting kids for "what you'll have to give up," and "how much thankless work" it'll be, and "how little you'll sleep" is quite frankly pathetic.

    Still, each to their own and mustn't judge etc.

    Happy New Year.
  • Psychotext 1 Jan 2013 14:17:42 55,030 posts
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    morriss wrote:
    Everything that's wrong with our individualistic, lazy, me-first, spineless, selfish society is encapsulated here.
    Works both ways, with a lot of people wanting kids for how it makes them feel, and so that they're not lonely in their old age.
  • chopsen 1 Jan 2013 14:24:14 16,281 posts
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    morriss wrote:
    Everything that's wrong with our individualistic, lazy, me-first, spineless, selfish society is encapsulated here.

    Don't have kids, that's fine. But not wanting kids for "what you'll have to give up," and "how much thankless work" it'll be, and "how little you'll sleep" is quite frankly pathetic.

    Still, each to their own and mustn't judge etc.

    Happy New Year.
    Well, for a start, people who genuinely don't want kids aren't going to be doing anybody any favours by having them out of some sense of duty. The motivation why they don't is irrelevant. You can label them pathetic if you want. Your post does sound very bitter and angry. Overly so, in fact, as if you are angry at something, and projecting a bit here.
  • Progguitarist 1 Jan 2013 14:32:09 10,532 posts
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    Do what makes you happy. If you don't have kids you'll be missing out on some wonderful experiences. If you do have kids you'll be somewhat more limited in your ability to do things.

    The only regret that I have is not having the freedom to go back to Uni and study music production but I can live without that in favour of being a Dad.
  • Deleted user 1 January 2013 14:41:03
    morriss wrote:
    Don't have kids, that's fine. But not wanting kids for "what you'll have to give up," and "how much thankless work" it'll be, and "how little you'll sleep" is quite frankly pathetic.
    Why exactly?
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