People who openly scratch their balls while talking to someone

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  • Dr.Haggard 22 Sep 2010 13:37:51 4,180 posts
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    Please stop it. I don't care if your balls are itchy, have some self control. I don't want to have a conversation with someone who is rummaging around inside their trousers.
  • Deleted user 22 September 2010 13:40:27
    I find it endearing.

    And sexy.
  • Craig0702 22 Sep 2010 13:40:37 2,178 posts
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    Hands down trousers or hands in pocket? At least with the latter they're trying to hide it!

    Still not as bad as the twunts you see walking down the street with one hand wedged down the front of their "tracky bottoms" permanently.

    Foisty!
  • andywilkie35 22 Sep 2010 13:41:15 5,338 posts
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    Was standing on the train this morning - some bloke who looked like Piers Morgan but about 10 years younger or so got on. Rather than hold on to one of the bars, he's one of those cunts who believes in his own ability to balance. After much tumbling around the carriage, he started doing a sort of squatting motion. Then eventually started scratching his nuts. My journey to work is under ten minutes, yet that was the longest ten minutes of my life. Whaddaprick.

    PSN ID & Xbox Gamertag: Wedjwants

  • MetalDog 22 Sep 2010 13:41:49 23,697 posts
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    Men who sit on public transport with their legs as far apart as humanly possible - please stop also.

    -- boobs do nothing for me, I want moustaches and chest hair.

  • Craig0702 22 Sep 2010 13:44:11 2,178 posts
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    MetalDog wrote:
    Men who sit on public transport with their legs as far apart as humanly possible - please stop also.

    I actually can't help this on buses. The seats are far too small to fit 6'4" of man in, they're too small for anyone even near 6' too. Feel bad when people sit next to me and it looks like I'm trying to prove how massive my balls are that I have to sit like that.

    Don't even get me started on the upstairs of buses with their stupidly low ceilings.

    /tallmanrant
  • nickthegun 22 Sep 2010 13:46:14 59,527 posts
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    If you ever speak to me on the phone, know this: I will at some point in the conversation have a hand down my trousers.

    My mrs thinks its massively disrespectful to scratch my nuts when on the phone to my mum.

    ---------------------------------------------------------
    someone say something funny

  • smoothpete 22 Sep 2010 13:47:47 31,501 posts
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    Women who sit on public transport with their legs as far apart as humanly possible - please feel free to continue. Give it a scratch if you want to.
  • Dr.Haggard 22 Sep 2010 13:48:32 4,180 posts
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    Craig0702 wrote:
    Hands down trousers or hands in pocket? At least with the latter they're trying to hide it!
    My boss does it all the time. Hand in pocket, rummaging away whilst talking to room full of people. Even to the point where he'll occasionally tilt his whole body presumably to access a particularly hard to reach spot.

    Either he's totally unaware that it's blindingly obvious to everyone in the room or he's just completely indifferent to how repulsive it is.

    /horp
  • Fake_Blood 22 Sep 2010 13:50:48 4,171 posts
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    Itchy balls are hard to ignore though.
  • localnotail 22 Sep 2010 13:52:49 23,093 posts
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    nickthegun wrote:
    If you ever speak to me on the phone, know this: I will at some point in the conversation have a hand down my trousers.

    Is this a comfort thing or are you just naturally libidious?

    I've often wondered if the external positioning of vulnerable vital organs was the root cause of men's natural tendency towards aggression. I'm sure we'd had a lot less war if male genitals were retractable at will.

    A strange game. The only winning move is not to play.

  • bzzct 22 Sep 2010 13:53:27 1,725 posts
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    MetalDog wrote:
    Men who sit on public transport with their legs as far apart as humanly possible - please stop also.
    True to some degree, but by the same token women who don't realise that sitting with legs close together is often massively uncomfortable for men in a way that just isn't the case for women.
  • MetalDog 22 Sep 2010 13:57:23 23,697 posts
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    I understand that you need to give them some room - but not this much room.

    ___________00__________
    _|......................................|_


    /ascii failure

    -- boobs do nothing for me, I want moustaches and chest hair.

  • nickthegun 22 Sep 2010 13:59:01 59,527 posts
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    localnotail wrote:
    nickthegun wrote:
    If you ever speak to me on the phone, know this: I will at some point in the conversation have a hand down my trousers.

    Is this a comfort thing or are you just naturally libidious?

    The former, probably. I dunno, the mrs calls it 'the gene' because at any given point in time a least one member of my family will be scratching their balls.

    We just like fiddling with our parts, nothing sexual about it.

    ---------------------------------------------------------
    someone say something funny

  • bzzct 22 Sep 2010 13:59:46 1,725 posts
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    If you do it all at the same time while making eye contact there is.
  • Ignatius_Cheese Moderator 22 Sep 2010 13:59:56 10,854 posts
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    Craig0702 wrote:
    Still not as bad as the twunts you see walking down the street with one hand wedged down the front of their "tracky bottoms" permanently.
    I don't get it. Is cupping your shaved scrotum some kind of chavvy sign?
  • JohnnyWashnGo 22 Sep 2010 14:00:35 1,544 posts
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    Craig0702 wrote:
    MetalDog wrote:
    Men who sit on public transport with their legs as far apart as humanly possible - please stop also.

    I actually can't help this on buses. The seats are far too small to fit 6'4" of man in, they're too small for anyone even near 6' too. Feel bad when people sit next to me and it looks like I'm trying to prove how massive my balls are that I have to sit like that.

    Don't even get me started on the upstairs of buses with their stupidly low ceilings.

    /tallmanrant

    Oh goody - another person with the same problem as me. Why do they make buses and trains for dwarfs?

    The train ride to/from work is a pain because of the stupidly cramped chairs. I cannot, under no circumstance, fit my legs into those seats without spreading them fully wide open. It makes for interesting conversations when someone asks me to move over.
  • Craig0702 22 Sep 2010 14:03:48 2,178 posts
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    Ignatius_Cheese wrote:
    Craig0702 wrote:
    Still not as bad as the twunts you see walking down the street with one hand wedged down the front of their "tracky bottoms" permanently.
    I don't get it. Is cupping your shaved scrotum some kind of chavvy sign?

    "cupping your shaved scrotum" - well that's something I didn't think I'd read/think of when I woke up this morning!

    I'm glad someone else feels my pain (literally sometimes) Johnny. Backseats of small cars are my nightmare, usually involves a shout of "SHOTGUN!" and being rather unlike a gentleman stealing the front seat from a girl.

    But yes, any sort of public ball cupping or scratching or fondling or cradling is a bad thing.
  • Craig0702 22 Sep 2010 14:04:06 2,178 posts
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    I may have double posted. That'll teach me for typing with one hand mid-cuppage.
  • Lukey__b 22 Sep 2010 14:04:08 3,716 posts
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    I've just realised I've been reading this thread with my hand down my trousers.

    'Sup, what's guanine?

  • localnotail 22 Sep 2010 14:06:00 23,093 posts
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    MetalDog wrote:
    I understand that you need to give them some room - but not this much room.

    ___________00__________
    _|......................................|_


    /ascii failure

    for some reason, this puts me in mind of the actors in Blackadder 3.

    A strange game. The only winning move is not to play.

  • Craig0702 22 Sep 2010 14:08:06 2,178 posts
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    localnotail wrote:
    MetalDog wrote:
    I understand that you need to give them some room - but not this much room.

    ___________00__________
    _|......................................|_


    /ascii failure

    for some reason, this puts me in mind of the actors in Blackadder 3.

    RAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!! Unaccustomed as I am to public speaking...

    \o/
  • TheSaint 22 Sep 2010 14:08:17 14,315 posts
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    Every man plays some pocket pool now and then.
  • localnotail 22 Sep 2010 14:09:59 23,093 posts
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    Smuggo wrote:
    MetalDog wrote:
    Men who sit on public transport with their legs as far apart as humanly possible - please stop also.

    But how else am i supposed to let you know how massive my cock is?

    No need, yours is so big it sticks out of your forehead.

    A strange game. The only winning move is not to play.

  • Fake_Blood 22 Sep 2010 14:10:03 4,171 posts
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    Well you have to, I can't ignore it, my face goes all twitchy otherwise.
  • graysonavich 22 Sep 2010 14:11:15 7,320 posts
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    Buy one of these and your left hand will never be out your boxers.
  • jonsaan 22 Sep 2010 14:11:31 25,342 posts
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    If you have to itch your own balls then there's something seriously wrong with your relationship...

    FCUTA!

  • oceanmotion 22 Sep 2010 14:12:16 15,846 posts
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    Can't be worse than your mate making you breakfast while scratching his dirty arse and picking spots off his back. Yea, I refused breakfast before that happened but my other friend ate breakfast, told him later though :D
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