Picture of Cara Ellison

Cara Ellison


Cara is a game producer and writer who, in any multiplayer game, will probably turn up and destroy what you have taken hours to build and then run away.

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It started with my Ranger holding an assault rifle and running towards the red dots on the radar. The graphics were a soupçon of PlayStation 2 mixed with a smidgen of grey texture updates. The loading times had been ludicrous. The terrible voiceover was touting the arrival of some GIANT INSECTS. GIANT INSECTS were swarming the city, GIANT INSECTS that haven't been seen in over SEVEN YEARS. GIANT INSECTS were last seen here SEVEN YEARS ago. SEVEN YEARS?! GIANT INSECTS.

It was somewhere around the time we were having a microtrip through technicolour tunnels that made us levitate that my friend said, "WE SHOULDN'T HAVE EATEN THAT PIG." My character bouncing around off fluorescent triangles, mangling my hand on WASD, I said "I'M GETTING NAUSEOUS," and she pointed to some microchips on a floor made of formulae and greek symbols and I put the chips in the computer's head. The next sick-making tunnel opened before me.

The Novelist is a game where you play as a voyeuristic ghost who possesses household lamps. Lamps you say? Why on earth would a ghost do that? What kind of - okay, okay. Back up. Let me explain.

The Typing of the Dead: Overkill review

Adventurous type looking for thrills.

2013 may be the Year of Luigi, but 2009 was the Year of Tarantino-Inspired Games. I imagine the nervy film director playing the 2009 console game Wet, his trembling hand scrabbling for his small carved totem of Uma Thurman, the mantra 'this is forgettable this is forgettable this is forgettable' running around and around his head. Games haven't done Quentin Tarantino much of a service, really.

Hate Plus review

Love takes time.

Christine Love makes games about sex and technology... sexnology games, if you will. They exist in a video game landscape that's saturated with objectified women, but rarely attempts to give women characters a voice for their own sexual desires. Her latest is Hate Plus, a follow-up to her last game Analogue: A Hate Story, both of which are about women characters' struggles to talk about their desires.

Ride to Hell: Retribution review

Donut resuscitate.

I'm not quite sure how a fatter, good-eyed Snake Plissken got in this 60s biker gif slideshow, but his name is Jake and he's turned up and it is really difficult to get him to ride a motorbike. And this is a game about a man whose job, in this video game, is to ride a motorbike.

Ladies and gentlemen of the court: Phoenix Wright is a goofy, spike-haired, blue-suited lawyerman who mostly has everyone drop dead around him. His first three adventures, Ace Attorney, Justice For All, and Trials and Tribulations mainly involve his various acquaintances dying from outlandish murders, occasionally reminiscent of the ways in which many Spinal Tap drummers have snuffed it. Phoenix is then usually called upon to defend the accused and Wright all Wrongs.