Just testing to see what stupidly long thread titles do to the forum because there's always some asp Page 3

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  • Dirtbox 28 Oct 2011 00:44:01 76,334 posts
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    Now I wonder what happens if there's more than one page!

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  • Dirtbox 28 Oct 2011 00:44:01 76,334 posts
    Seen 28 minutes ago
    Registered 12 years ago
    Now I wonder what happens if there's more than one page!

    +1 / Like / Tweet this post

  • Dirtbox 28 Oct 2011 00:44:01 76,334 posts
    Seen 28 minutes ago
    Registered 12 years ago
    Now I wonder what happens if there's more than one page!

    +1 / Like / Tweet this post

  • Dirtbox 28 Oct 2011 00:44:01 76,334 posts
    Seen 28 minutes ago
    Registered 12 years ago
    Now I wonder what happens if there's more than one page!

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  • Dirtbox 28 Oct 2011 00:45:19 76,334 posts
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    I think that's a successfully annoying test.

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  • neilka 28 Oct 2011 00:48:16 14,942 posts
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    cuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscuntscunts
  • neilka 28 Oct 2011 00:49:57 14,942 posts
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    Well that's cunted it.
  • JBlokeUK 28 Oct 2011 01:29:25 2,309 posts
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    That's a lot of cunts.

    I like it when he's angry.

  • speedofthepuma 28 Oct 2011 03:03:50 13,246 posts
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    I only count 3?

    I've turned off all the avatars and crap, so don't expect me to be impressed by yours.

  • speedofthepuma 28 Oct 2011 03:04:20 13,246 posts
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    And I think you're being a bit harsh.

    I've turned off all the avatars and crap, so don't expect me to be impressed by yours.

  • Deleted user 28 October 2011 04:11:26
    Good morning, Mr. Basset.
    This is your wake-up call.



    Please move your ass.



    Stampede!



    Stampede, Earl! Get out of the way!



    You dumb shit.



    I was in a stampede once.



    head going hell-bent for the horizon.



    Exactly how many cows
    are required for a stampede, Earl?



    I mean, is it like three or more?
    Is there a minimum speed?



    I wish a stampede up your ass.



    No breakfast?



    I did it yesterday.
    It was bologna and beans.



    No. It was eggs. I did eggs...



    ...over easy.



    The hell you did.
    Bologna and beans. It's your turn.



    I guess when I'm your age...



    ...l'll forget what I eat, too.



    Goddamn it!



    I ask you, is this a job for intelligent men?



    Show me one. I'll ask him.



    If we were serious about money,
    we'd quit being hired hands.



    Handymen, Earl. We are handymen.



    We should quit this job...



    ...and find ourselves
    some real employment.



    Are you going to give up
    all this personal freedom?



    I don't know.



    Freeway!



    What's on the agenda for today?



    - It's garbage day.
    - Man! Already?



    What's Nestor paying us?



    $ . And that's $ more than we got.



    Burt and Heather's place is closer.
    Let's do their linoleum today...



    ...and the garbage tomorrow.



    Nestor's not home tomorrow.
    We don't dig today, we're not paid.



    Damn it, Valentine, you never plan ahead.



    You never take the long view.
    Here it is Monday...



    ...and I'm already thinking of Wednesday.



    It is Monday, right?



    Who the hell's that?
    That's not the grad student?



    - No. He graduated. Must be the new one.
    - The new one?



    That's supposed to be a girl.



    You will have long, blonde hair...



    ...big green eyes, world-class breasts...



    ...ass that won't quit
    and legs that go all the way up!



    Hi! I'm Rhonda LeBeck.
    I'm up here for the semester.



    - Yeah, geography.
    - Geology.



    Well, actually seismology. Earthquakes.



    You two must be Val and Earl.



    - I've heard all about you.
    - We deny everything.



    I've got a question for you.



    Do you know if anybody's
    doing any drilling or blasting...



    ...or anything like that?



    Around here? No, ma'am.



    I'm supposed to monitor the seismographs.



    You know, they measure vibrations.



    Vibrations in the ground.



    Yeah.



    I've been getting
    some really strange readings.



    The school's had the machines here, and
    we've never recorded anything like this.



    We'll ask around.
    See if anyone's heard anything.



    Thanks.



    God, I hope they're not broken.
    I might have to bag the whole semester.



    Anyway, sorry to bother you.



    No problem.



    Nice meeting you.
    Hope you get it all sorted out.



    If you wanted,
    we could take a look at those...



    ...seismographs for her if you want.



    What the hell do we know
    about seismographs?



    Nothing.



    - It might be a slick way to get to know her.
    - Why?



    Damn it, Valentine.



    You don't go for any gal
    unless she fits your list, top to bottom.



    - Well sure!
    - It's dumber than my hind end.



    I mean, like that...



    ...Bobby Lynn Dexter.



    Tammy Lynn Baxter.



    It don't matter.
    They're all the same: dead weight.



    "Oh, I broke a nail!"



    Makes my skin crawl.



    I'm a victim of circumstance.



    I thought you call it your pecker.



    Pizza-face!



    Melvin.



    You touch that truck and die.



    Man, I'm really shaking.



    Thanks, Walter.



    These are hollow points,
    but not hydro-shock hollow points.



    - Bullets are bullets.
    - Hi, guys. What's happening?



    We ran into that new college student,
    that Rona.



    Rhonda. She's having trouble with her...



    ...things.



    Those college kids turn up
    oil or uranium or something out there...



    ...next thing the Feds will be at our door.
    "Sorry. Time to move. Eminent domain."



    Down, honey. Down.



    Yeah, Burt. The way you worry...



    ...you'll get a heart attack before
    you get a chance to survive World War III.



    We'll see.



    Guys, listen. Bearing going out.
    What do you think?



    - Could be.
    - Later, Chang. We got a schedule to keep.



    Yeah. See, we plan ahead.
    That way we don't do anything right now.



    Earl explained it to me.



    Cocktail?



    You bet.



    I'll tell you.



    Nobody handles garbage
    better than we do.



    Come on, Earl. This is low.



    We have got to set our sights
    a little bit higher.



    Melvin, why don't you give us a hand?
    Most of this shit is yours anyway.



    Listen, run to the store
    and pick me up a six-pack. I'll pay for it.



    Son, beer is for adults.



    Not having a plan
    is what keeps us doing jobs like this.



    Just doing jobs like this
    is you dragging your feet.



    Are you going to stand there and tell me
    I'm the reason we're still in Perfection?



    You know how close I am
    to leaving this place right now?



    I'll call that little bluff. How close?



    - Shit!
    - Goddamn!



    Jesus Christ! Goddamn!



    Don't forget the TV.



    - Why you bringing the vacuum cleaner?
    - I like it.



    - You never use it.
    - It's good for parts.



    Besides, maybe we'll hire a maid.
    You think about that?



    Get in the truck.



    Guys!



    Guys, wait!



    Sorry, Nancy.
    We're not delivering firewood anymore.



    - We're heading for Bixby permanent.
    - Sure.



    Oh, my God. You really are!



    Mindy, what's the count?



    .



    I don't need firewood. I have this big order
    to fill and have to build my pottery kiln.



    Come on, it'll be at least a month's work.



    I'll throw in lunches.



    And beer.



    I can't believe we said no to free beer.



    We did it! We faced temptation
    and did not bend!



    Goddamn! Praise the Lord!



    Now there's nothing, and I mean nothing,
    between us and Bixby.



    Look at that guy!



    That's one job I'd never do.
    Working around electricity.



    Hold up.



    That's Edgar Deems.



    Come on.



    He only wears that one damn jacket.



    That's him, I'm telling you.



    He sure must've been drunk this time.



    Get your butt down from there!



    Shit.



    We can't leave him up there.



    Thank you, Edgar.



    You owe me on this one,
    you damned old boozehound.



    One of these days, you'll have
    to get your ass on a wagon and stay there.



    It's not like I don't have
    better things to do than climb towers...



    ...and drag your hairy ass down.



    Jesus!



    Was it a heart attack, doctor?



    No.



    He died of dehydration. Thirst.



    That doesn't make any sense.
    That takes a couple of days, doesn't it?



    Maybe even three or four.



    You mean he sat up there
    three or four days?



    He sat up there and just died of thirst?



    You reckon he hated Perfection
    more than us?



    - Do you suppose he wanted to kill himself?
    - Somebody must've chased him up there.



    You mean someone that ain't scared
    of a Winchester rifle?



    Then what'd they do?
    Camp out and wait for him to die?



    What the hell?



    What the shit?



    Fred!



    - This is weird.
    - This is real weird.



    - Jesus!
    - What the hell's going on?



    I mean, what the hell is going on?



    Get the hell out of here!
    There's a killer on the loose!



    - What?
    - A murderer, man! A real psycho!



    He's cutting people's heads off.
    I'm not kidding!



    They're pulling our chain.



    Yeah.



    What?



    Howard!



    Carmine?



    Who could be doing it?



    I'm not accusing anybody,
    but some of my cattle are missing.



    Are you serious? Old Fred's dead?



    - You're bullshitting me.
    - What happened to Fred?



    Worse than Edgar.



    - What happened to him?
    - You won't believe it.



    - I need a candy bar.
    - I don't believe this. The phone's dead.



    - Walter, your phone is dead!
    - I didn't do it.



    Nestor, what's happening?



    - Somebody killed old Fred.
    - What's going on?



    Val, you've got to get to Bixby,
    and get the police up here. And step on it.



    Consider it stepped on.



    We decided to leave this place
    one damn day too late, you know?



    There's sure as hell
    nothing to stop us now.



    Everybody we know between here
    and Bixby is already dead.



    Look out!



    Is there some higher force at work here?



    I mean, are we asking too much of life?



    Where the hell are these guys?



    What are they doing? Blasting?



    Where are you guys?
    It's not like there's another road, assholes!



    - Jesus! I don't believe this!
    - You're hung up.



    I am not!



    You're hung up, I tell you!



    You're going to burn the clutch!



    - You could break an axle like that.
    - Could you shut up?



    I don't need to spend the night out here.



    Crybaby.



    - Could it have been coyotes?
    - No way.



    Coyotes didn't kill Fred.



    It's Val and Earl.



    They shouldn't be here already.



    - Thought you two were in Bixby by now.
    - You're won't believe this.



    - Mom!
    - Oh, my God!



    - Burt, be careful.
    - Unreal.



    - Where'd you get it?
    - I didn't know we had it.



    - It's disgusting.
    - Some kind of snake?



    - It's more like an eel to me.
    - Eels live in the water, don't they?



    - Big mother slug, maybe.
    - Don't touch!



    Relax. It's dead.



    It must've grabbed us!



    - That's why the truck stalled.
    - I said I wasn't hung up.



    This stalled out your truck?



    It'd have to be one strong son of a bitch.



    Stinks, too.



    I'll give you boys $ for this.



    $ .



    - Okay, $ !
    - $ .



    - Okay, $ .
    - Damn right, $ .



    I don't believe you guys.



    Could be a snake!



    Some kind of mutation.



    Whatever it is...



    ...just one of these couldn't eat up Fred
    and his whole flock of sheep.



    You think there are more out there?



    I'm dead.
    Let's put this stuff up in the morning.



    We have to go to Bixby in the morning.



    - The cinder blocks are in.
    - The cinder blocks. Oh, my God!



    Just keep looking at that beautiful sky.



    That's the sky that'll be
    over our roof every night when we're done.



    What if we don't finish the roof?
    Then we can look at the sky all the time.



    That damn thing.



    Maybe it's time we buy a new generator.



    It's gone!



    What do you mean, it's gone?



    You sure this is where it was?



    It was right here! There's the cord.
    Hold this.



    Maybe the ground caved in.
    There's mines and stuff around here.



    Well, don't then. You don't want to fall in.



    Let's go.



    God, what is that stink?



    You hear that?



    Come on. Let's just go.



    Let's go back to town or something.
    Please, Jim!



    Maybe it's a geological thing
    like natural gas...



    ...or a geyser. They stink like that.
    Remember in Yellowstone?



    Something's got me!



    Something's got me down here!



    Get something. Get me out of here!



    Something's got me. Please get me out!



    Help me!



    Oh, my God.



    - Don't look so afraid. It won't hurt you.
    - Mindy look up. Smile.



    Hold it.



    Melvin, get out of there!



    - Old Chang, slick as snot, and I ain't lying.
    - A lousy $ .



    A man who plans ahead.



    We arm ourselves,
    we set perimeters, we stand guard.



    Any of those snake things show up here,
    we make 'em extinct.



    - All right!
    - Burt, get serious.



    Yeah! You make it sound like a war.



    What've you got against being prepared?



    Rambo.



    Walter's got a CB radio.
    Why aren't you calling Bixby? The police...



    We can't reach outside the valley
    because of the mountains.



    You're next. Sit down, look scared.



    The phone's out. The road's out.
    We're on our own.



    You two are just loving it, aren't you?



    Nancy, don't get personal about this!
    We've got to do something.



    Hell, yes!



    We are completely cut off.



    We got the cliffs to the north,
    mountains to the east and the west.



    That's why Heather and me settled here.
    Geographic isolation.



    - There's got to be a way we can get help.
    - This isn't the moon!



    What are you going to do,
    walk the miles to Bixby?



    There's Walter's saddle horses.



    That's it. You're welcome to them.



    Somebody could ride to Bixby.



    That's not bad.



    Who's best on a horse?



    They better be fast.



    We don't want to be stuck
    on a couple of canners.



    - Those snakes couldn't travel that fast.
    - For all you know they could fly.



    What do you want?
    This Colt or Edgar's old rifle?



    Rifle.



    - Here's some Swiss cheese and bullets.
    - Thanks.



    - You guys all set?
    - Ready as we'll ever be.



    We're going to find that college girl,
    tell her to get her ass back into town.



    Good idea. We'll stop by the doctor's place
    and see if they went into Bixby.



    Wait a minute, guys.



    Take something that packs
    more of a punch than that. -. .



    Why don't you take
    one of our Browning autos?



    Or better than that. Take my Model ?



    It's. "H and H" mag.



    Thanks, Heather.



    I hope we don't need to use it.



    It's got me!



    It's got me!



    - Grow up!
    - Damn it!



    - He's only kidding.
    - You came that close.



    Too close. No more games.



    One of these days
    somebody's going to kick your ass.



    Doctor?



    I hate this shit.



    Wait a minute.



    The car's gone.
    We just missed 'em, that's all.



    Where's the goddamn golden oldie
    coming from?



    - What the hell's this?
    - You got me.



    Here's the plan. We don't even stop.
    We ride like hell.



    Tonight we'll keep right on going.
    We'll walk the horses.



    That is the plan.
    What the hell are those things?



    - How could they bury a station wagon?
    - Why would they do it?



    Come on, git!



    Walter wouldn't know
    a decent horse if it bit him in the ass.



    Wait a minute.
    They got wind of something they don't like.



    Something's going on.



    I don't see anything anywhere!



    - Are you okay?
    - Yeah. What about my horse?



    What in the name of...



    That's how they get you.
    They're under the goddamn ground.



    - What the hell are they?
    - Sons of bitches!



    Must be a million of 'em!



    Nope. Just one.



    Come on.



    He's gaining on us!



    Look!



    We can make it!



    Stupid son of a bitch.



    It knocked itself cold.



    Cold, my ass!



    He's dead.



    We killed it.



    We killed it!



    Fuck you!



    Hey, guys. What's going on?



    Did you notice anything weird
    a minute ago?



    I mean, it just happened...



    What's that?



    All right, together. One, two, three.



    Jesus Christ!



    Does it smell like that 'cause it's dead?



    I don't see any eyes.



    Must be totally subterranean.



    And those tentacles.



    You know, I think
    they shoot right out of its mouth...



    ...and they hook you and pull you right in.



    Good thing we stopped it
    before it killed anybody else.



    This is important, you know.



    This is like...



    ...well, let's just say it.



    This is probably the biggest
    zoological discovery of the century.



    Check this out.



    I found the ass end.



    Jesus, we really caught something here.



    - Wow!
    - Man!



    That's one big mother.



    This must be the old boy
    had your seismos working overtime.



    It must push itself along with these.



    All of them pushing at once.



    That's why it moved so fast.



    This thing had sensors tripping
    all over the place. No...



    Rhonda, you ever heard
    of anything like this?



    Everybody knows about 'em.
    We just didn't tell you.



    Hell, man,
    no one ever saw anything like this!



    We're really onto something.



    I'll tell you, old Chang don't get
    his slick mitts on this for no measly $ .



    You got that right.



    All right, here's the plan.
    We need a flatbed...



    - Right, with a winch.
    - A five-ton maybe.



    No, don't want a winch. It'd tear it all up.



    - A crane?
    - Yeah, a crane with lifting straps.



    Shut up.



    - There are three more of these things.
    - What?



    Three more?



    I've got seismographs all over the valley.
    Compare the readings.



    Here's one at : yesterday.



    But here's one three miles away
    at the exact time. That's two.



    - But here...
    - We'll take your word.



    - Yeah, where's your truck?
    - Just beyond that hill.



    What?



    - Damn prairie dog burrow.
    - Little sons of bitches.



    This way!



    Up on that rock!



    Looks like the one that got our truck.



    - Where the hell's your truck?
    - Right over there.



    I don't think we can make that.



    At least he can't climb.



    Live ones smell worse than the dead ones.



    I got it.



    They're mutations caused by radiation.



    Or no.



    The government built 'em.
    Big surprise for the Russians.



    There's nothing like them
    in the fossil record. I'm sure.



    Okay, so, they predate the fossil record.



    That would make 'em
    a couple billion years old.



    And we've just never seen one 'til now.



    Right.



    I vote for outer space.
    No way these are local boys.



    Well, haven't seen a sign for hours.



    Must be long gone.



    Yeah, must be.



    Why don't you take
    a little stroll and find out?



    We've got to do something.



    "We've got to do something."



    I don't know why "we"
    always has to be "me" every damn time.



    We, we, we. What do I look like?
    An expert on worms?



    Watch it, it's got a good six-foot reach.



    Thank you, Earl.



    Son of a bitch!



    Son of a goddamn bitch!
    Pardon my French.



    Shit! It's been waiting here all this time?
    How's it know we're still here?



    It's got no eyes, right?
    Sure as hell can't smell us underground.



    It's been listening.



    Of course!



    It senses seismic vibration.



    It can hear every move we make
    on this rock. It's a perfect conductor!



    That means we're stuck.
    That pisses me off!



    I hate to be crude,
    but I've got to take care of business.



    - Me, too.
    - Same here.



    Thanks.



    No problem. Anytime.



    Well, what's the plan?



    The first thing we've got to do
    is see if old Stumpy's still out there.



    - Can I borrow that shovel?
    - Yeah.



    Doesn't he have a home to go to?



    That's why Edgar never got down
    off that damn tower.



    I have an idea.



    You know, we have to come up with a plan
    or he's going to wait us to death.



    - I was thinking...
    - Why not run? We outran him yesterday.



    Run for it? Running's not a plan.
    Running's what you do when a plan fails.



    You're not trying to think of a plan.



    It ain't like we got a hell of a lot of options.



    There's always options.
    We've just got to think of them.



    Why don't you start thinking?



    Why do I always
    have to do all the thinking?



    - Who died and made you Einstein?
    - You know how to pole vault?



    We just stay where he can't get us...



    ...on these residual boulders.
    My truck's parked next to one.



    Stay on those residual boulders!



    That Tammy Lynn Baxter,
    she do much pole vaulting?



    That's pretty good.



    That slimebag won't give us much time
    once we hit that truck.



    - I say we all jump together.
    - Right.



    Wait.



    Okay, ready.



    One, two, three!



    Go!



    Watch it, Val!



    Move!



    Can somebody, perhaps, help me?



    No!



    The snake things are just their tongues.
    These animals are huge!



    I'm sorry.
    I'm having a real difficult time with this.



    Come on, you guys, answer.



    - Where's Burt and Heather?
    - I can't reach them.



    I guess they're still driving around.



    What's the name you call those things?



    Where do they come from?



    - I don't know.
    - You're a scientist, aren't you?



    Aren't you supposed to have a theory?



    These creatures
    are absolutely unprecedented.



    But where do they come from?



    Yeah!



    It doesn't matter where they come from.



    No name.



    We discovered them,
    we should name them!



    Forget the damn name!



    Now me and Earl need to get
    out of this valley.



    Hang on. Let's not go off half-cocked.



    Somebody's bound to come check on us
    once they see the road is out...



    ...and the lines are down.
    - That's how it works.



    - "Suckoids."
    - "Oids." I like "snakeoids."



    One of them comes near me
    and I'll hit him with a five-pound pickax.



    You don't understand. They come up
    from the ground and grab you.



    They sense the slightest vibration
    through the ground.



    Even footsteps. That's how they hunt.



    So we don't vibrate, right?



    Maybe they won't even come through here.



    Maybe they'll leave us alone!



    Chain saw. That's what I'll use.



    Wake up!



    Now, look!



    They're headed right for us!



    They trapped Edgar here.
    Grabbed old Fred right here.



    Nailed those two poor suckers on the road
    and the doctor's place is here!



    This valley is just one long smorgasbord.



    We have got to get out.



    I'm going to get Mindy.



    She's okay.
    I saw her playing down the street.



    That's what I like, "Graboids"!
    That's it, "graboids"!



    Jesus, Walter.



    We're going to be sorry
    if we don't give it a name.



    Okay, you say let's get out of here.
    Where are we supposed to go?



    Rhonda's got an idea about that.



    See, they move very easily
    through the Pleistocene alluvials.



    The dirt. The loose soil
    that covers the valley floor.



    But they can't move through rock.



    - We should go west to the mountains.
    - She means up the old Jeep trail.



    If those mountains are granite
    we'd be safe.



    We could hike along them to Bixby if we...



    I scared you, didn't I?



    You little ass wipe.



    You don't knock it off,
    you're going to be shitting this basketball.



    Pardon my French.



    It's going to take us days
    to get back with help with Nestor.



    We're not going to leave you alone.



    - Damn it! I'm going to kick his ass!
    - I'm going to help you.



    Where is that little shit stain?



    Melvin, get your...



    Get inside!



    - Run! Come on!
    - Come on, get in!



    - Walter, you got a gun?
    - No!



    - What are we going to do?
    - Be quiet!



    Where is he?



    Now remember, no noise, no vibrations.



    No, Mindy.



    Stop.



    Mindy, get off the pogo stick.



    - Get her, Val!
    - Mindy, come back!



    Be quiet. Don't move.



    Mindy, get back.



    Run! Get in the house!



    Get him off or it'll suck that truck down.



    Go back, for Chrissake!



    Jesus, here comes another one!



    Run! Come on!



    Get out of your pants!



    Look out!




    Run!



    Don't look back. Come on!



    Sorry.



    - Rhonda, here.
    - Thank you.



    What are we going to do?
    How long 'til they go away?



    They got the patience of Job.



    They sit and wait until they hear
    something that sounds like lunch.



    - We've got to have a plan.
    - I got a plan.



    You drive the truck up to the mountain,
    walk to Bixby, get some help.



    - Those scumsuckers ate our radials.
    - You can take my truck.



    No, we need a major four-wheel drive
    just to get up that Jeep trail.



    That trail's all messed up.



    Turn it off!



    Pull it back!



    I got it.



    Give me your hand!



    Son of a bitch.



    Son of a bitch!



    Come on, let's go! The roof!



    Come on!



    - Jump! You can do it!
    - I can't!



    Don't stop. Keep moving!



    Oh, my God.



    You okay?



    What's going on? Where are you guys?



    What's up?
    What the hell are you doing up there?



    Shut the hell up.



    - Get up on your roof.
    - No way!



    Nancy, get up on your roofs.



    Up on your roofs!
    They come through the floor.



    I don't know. I can't believe it.



    No tracks.



    No sign. No spoor.



    You'd think after eating all those sheep
    they'd have to take a dump someplace.



    Yeah. I don't understand it.



    Walter, this is Burt. Come back.



    Walter? Anybody copy?



    I'm Waiting.



    -Walter, you there? Come back!
    - Okay, I got it.



    Who's minding the store, for God's sake?



    Burt, listen.
    We found out what's been killing people.



    - Say "over."
    - Over.



    Negative copy on that, Walter.
    Check your frequency.



    I'm on . Come back.



    Burt, can you hear me noW? Over.



    Is that you?
    What're you doing back already?



    Something real weird's going on
    over there.



    They're up on top of the roof.



    I think they're going for Burt's.



    Man! They're going!



    Burt, get out of your basement.
    Take your radio.



    You and Heather get up on your roof.
    We'll talk later. Over.



    Up on the roof?
    What are you talking about?



    Damn it, Burt. Listen to him.
    Something's wrong.



    Burt, Jesus Christ!



    Get up on your roof! The things!



    They're under the ground.
    They're bigger than We thought.



    They're huge. They're coming after you.
    They're coming right noW!



    We don't see anything. What the hell
    are you talking about? Over.



    They're under the ground!



    They can dig. Big monsters!
    Underground! NoW get out!



    Hurry!



    Jesus...



    Burt, come on.



    Magazine!



    Here!



    Broke into the wrong goddamn rec room,
    didn't you, you bastard?



    We killed it! You got that?
    We killed that motherhumper! Come back.



    Roger that, Burt. And congratulations.



    Be advised, however, there are two more.
    Repeat, two more motherhumpers.



    Burt got one! He killed one!



    - Way to go, dude!
    - All right!



    I guess we don't get to make fun
    of Burt's lifestyle anymore.



    Say, Burt?



    Any chance you can get the other two?
    Come back.



    One second, pal.



    You didn't get penetration
    even with the elephant gun.



    Good Lord!



    We can't get 'em.



    I never figured
    on having to shoot through dirt.



    The best goddamn bullet stop there is.
    Come back.



    Let me see that.



    Forget shooting them.
    Can you get to your truck?



    -Over.
    - No problem.



    You have the only truck
    that can get up that Jeep trail.



    Now listen. Here's the plan.



    You and Heather go for help.
    You get to the mountains and...



    You guys!



    - Come over.
    - Hang on a sec.



    - He's up to something.
    - Lf it isn't our old pal Stumpy.



    Bastard.



    What do you think it's trying to do?



    Why do you keep asking me?



    What the hell was that?



    Breaker there, Earl.
    What did you Want us to do?



    Come back.



    Hang on, Burt.
    This bastard's trying something new.



    Over.



    They wasn't making no noise.
    Why is he bothering them?



    It's like it's studying the buildings,
    trying to figure them out.



    They can feel our vibrations
    but they can't find us.



    Looks to me
    like they're coming up with a plan.



    Watch it, Nestor!



    Shit! Enough!



    - Get off the ground! Get moving!
    - Get out of there!



    Move it!



    No, that's no good!
    You've got to get higher!



    No way!



    No! You guys have got to do something!



    You've got to do something!



    Burt? Heather?



    You got us. Come on back. Over.



    We're in deep shit over here.
    We'll have to change that plan.



    - Burt, cut it out!
    - I think I scared him.



    No use going for help.



    We'd be dead
    long before you'd ever get back.



    We're With you.
    Tell us What you Want to do.



    This one's going to tear this town
    out from under us.



    We're going to have to
    get out of here together...



    ...noW.
    - Okay.



    We're coming after everybody.
    Just hang tight. Over.



    You're going to have to
    forget about the truck.



    Yeah, we've got you, Heather.



    The situation hasn't changed.



    We still have to make it to solid rock.
    There's got to be a way.



    Like what? There's nothing left
    that can make it to those mountains.



    Quiet, man.



    It doesn't matter now.
    They know we're here.



    We need a helicopter. Or a goddamn tank!



    Wait a minute. The Cat!



    - Could we take the Cat?
    - Jesus. It's slower than hell.



    But it weighs more than tons.
    There's no way they could lift that.



    - Could they? I mean...
    - But we can't all fit on the bulldozer.



    No, but we could...



    ...drag something, though.
    We could pull a car behind it. I don't know.



    Hell, that old semitrailer.



    - Its tires are flat.
    - Doesn't matter.



    That Cat can pull anything.



    - We just roll on out of here.
    - We've got a plan!



    Of course, that's a hell of a long walk.



    They only respond to vibration, right?



    Couldn't we distract them somehow?



    Good. Something to keep 'em busy.
    Like a decoy.



    Melvin, you want to make a buck?



    Eat it!



    How about Walter's little tractor?
    Start him up.



    Let him go out by himself.



    Let those things follow him all over
    if they like that noise.



    Not bad. What do you think?



    Ground's getting closer.
    I say we go with Miguel's plan.



    Hold on, Nancy!



    - I'm making the run for the Cat.
    - Like hell.



    - I'm faster than you.
    - But I'm best at driving the Cat.



    - Not while I'm around.
    - Listen to me. I'm older and wiser.



    Well you're half right.



    Damn! I lost. Guess I'll have to do it.



    I won. I pick who does it.



    Ready when you are, Miguel.



    There he is. There he goes!



    He's chasing it!



    It's going. This one's going, too!



    - Good luck, shithead.
    - Don't worry about me, jerk-off.



    You suicidal son of a bitch.



    Keep going!



    Oh, my God.



    Come on!



    They're going to get him!



    Val, stop! They're coming! Be quiet!



    Don't move!



    It worked. They can't find him.



    We've got to...



    ...make some noise.



    A lot of noise!



    You sorry sons of bitches.
    Come and get my ass!



    Over here, you slime bucket!
    Come get me!



    What are you, scared? Come on.



    What's she doing?



    That did it, girl! Goddamn good thinking.



    - You okay?
    - Yeah.



    Here goes.



    - Here.
    - Yeah.



    Goddamn! Armored transport.



    Let's get going!



    Come on, let's go, you two.
    We're headed for the mountains.



    If that's how we're doing it,
    we're going prepared.



    We can't hold still long.
    These things are damn smart.



    - They're getting smarter by the minute.
    - Fine.



    We've got some new things to teach 'em.



    You see that?



    They're doing it again.
    They try it every time we stop!



    Jesus Christ! We're only going nine miles.



    Those things will be on our ass
    every foot of the way, right?



    - Just hurry!
    - What are you doing up there?



    - Can't you see we are sinking.
    - Get in the trailer!



    What do you think? Max firepower or this?



    I go for penetration. The.
    shooting solids. Less ammo to carry.



    Come on. Move it!



    Watch these ammo boxes!



    - Come on, Burt!
    - Heather, hurry!



    - Tell 'em to come on!
    - Okay, now!



    Now! Come on!



    Give me a gun. I'll take one.



    I wouldn't give you a gun
    if it was World War III.



    Food for five years.



    gallons of gas,
    air and water filtration, Geiger counter...



    ...bomb shelter.



    Underground. Goddamn monsters!



    There we go! Fallen Rock.



    Any sign of them?



    Maybe they just gave up, you know?



    What's that?



    Damn it! What the hell are they doing?



    I don't care what they're doing
    as long as they're doing it way over there.



    Wait! Look out!



    - Burt, you okay?
    - I'm okay.



    Are they going to get us? What happened?



    - Burt, you sure you're okay?
    - Yeah.



    What happened?



    They dug a trap.



    I can't believe this.



    All right.



    Here.



    Let me have my gun.



    Hungry? Eat this!



    Everybody down!



    There they are!



    - Did you kill one?
    - I don't know.



    No, there's still two of them.



    - There're two different dust trails.
    - Made them think twice.



    What's in those?



    A few household chemicals
    in the proper proportion.



    Here they come. They're coming back!



    We'll have to make a run for those rocks.



    - I don't know. That's a long way.
    - They'll get us!



    They're going to get us if we stay here.



    - You have any more of those bombs?
    - We've got you covered.



    What if we throw one that way, the way
    we want to go? Then when it explodes...



    ...if it drives them away,
    we run like goddamn bastards.



    Pardon my French.



    What if they don't get scared?
    What if they don't run?



    I don't think it does scare them.
    It hurts them.



    They're sensitive to sound, they'll run.



    Hell, she's got my vote!



    That's it! We're making a run for it!



    - We're going for the rocks.
    - I don't know. They're too fast.



    - You can't out run 'em. No way!
    - This'll make 'em think twice.



    Everybody ready to run?



    Heads down!



    It worked! There they go!



    Let's go!



    Come on, Burt.



    You asshole!



    Get up.



    - Get up here!
    - I'm with you, honey.



    Go!



    You asshole!
    There are no bullets in this gun.



    Got you moving, didn't it?



    So now what?



    Could we make it to the mountains?
    Use Burt's explosives?



    No way.



    We'd need of those bombs.



    That's it.



    We're not getting off this rock.



    We're not going to pole vault out of here.
    That's for damn sure.



    Wait a minute. What're you talking about?



    It's like you're giving up.



    They'll wait out there 'til we're dead.
    That's exactly what they do.



    Wait!



    For Chrissake, we could've made a stand
    at our place. We had food, water...



    You can't fight 'em like that.



    So you two screw-ups
    hauled us way the hell out here?



    Why don't you just back off, string bean?
    We could've left your ass on the roof!



    I wish you had, fearless leader.
    Who put you two in charge?



    Don't push me!



    If them graboids don't kill him, I will.



    What?



    They'd have torn up your place
    in half an hour.



    Come on. Just let it go. Forget about it.



    I know he does.
    He thinks he knows everything.



    If it comes to starvation,
    I know what I'm doing.



    Take one of these...



    ...walk right out there with the fuse lit
    and let 'em take me down.



    Good Lord, honey.



    Now that's not a bad idea.



    No. It gives me an idea.



    Going fishing.



    There's one. Straight out in front.



    Let's see if we can keep him right there.



    - How much we need?
    - I don't know. They're pretty quick.



    Fifteen seconds at least.



    - Which kind of fuse is that?
    - Cannon fuse.



    - What the hell you use if for?
    - My cannon.



    You guys watch yourselves.



    Right out there, about ...



    - You're not going do your lasso thing?
    - Just 'cause you're no good with a rope.



    All right, get back!



    Come on, baby.



    Take it. Take the bait!



    Yeah! All right!



    Look at it!



    Okay, one to go.



    Damn! Where the hell is he?



    Hope he didn't wise up.



    There.



    Look who it is.



    Give me that thing.



    This son of a bitch is mine.



    There it goes!



    - All right, get back!
    - I got it.



    Come on.



    Come on. Lunchtime, slophead.



    All right, get down!



    Oh, my God! It's coming...



    Get back! Run!



    Get up, come on!



    What're you doing out there?



    Okay, let's make some noise.
    Try to distract them.



    Fresh meat!



    Wait.



    This one's not falling for it.



    This one ain't dumb.



    He's trying to trick us.



    Use your bomb.



    It's our last one.



    What else you going use it for?



    So what if we make it to the rocks.
    We'll be dead in three days anyway.



    I want to live for the three days.



    What the hell? What's the matter?



    - Use the bomb, for God's sake!
    - Throw that bomb, man!



    Scare 'em away!



    Throw the bomb!



    This bastard ain't smarter than us.



    For Chrissake, Val!



    - I'm going to go for it.
    - Go for what?



    - What are you doing?
    - I got a goddamn plan!



    Where the hell is it?



    I've got it!



    This better be one hell of a great plan!



    Get ready!



    - Light it, man!
    - Not yet.



    What are you waiting for?



    Go!



    Come on!



    Too far! You threw it behind him.



    Run!



    Can you fly, you sucker?



    It just suddenly hit me, you know.



    Stampede.



    Now...



    ...the second we hit Bixby,
    we start making phone calls.



    We could make some real money
    on this thing.



    We could get in People magazine.



    People? Hell! National Geographic.



    Smile.



    Burt loaned me his camera.



    Yeah. He gave us these tires, too.



    It's all pretty exciting, huh?



    There's going to be research,
    and I'm going to be in on it.



    The first thing to do
    is take pictures of that one we dug up.



    Yeah. Pictures seem like a good idea.



    Thanks for everything.
    Saving my life and stuff.



    You're welcome.



    Maybe I'll see you sometime?



    See ya.



    I know! I'm working up to it.



    What am I doing?



    What's a woman like her want
    with a guy like me?



    She's going for her damn Ph.D.



    Yeah?



    I just wanted to...
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