Saints Row 2: Ultor Exposed Review

By Kristan Reed Published 24 April, 2009

Money for nothing.

Version tested: Xbox 360

Seeing as it's been more than six months since the game hit the shelves, you might have expected Volition to beef up Saints Row 2 rather more substantially than it has with this lightweight serving of DLC.

You also might have expected more content for your cash - Ultor Exposed carries a price tag of 800 Microsoft Points (GBP 6.80), or GBP 7.99 on PSN. The hard sell is that you get to play with (or rather, alongside) US porn star Tera Patrick in three new campaign missions. It's headline-grabbing rather than crotch-grabbing stuff, and shockingly each mission can be romped through in around ten minutes. Ker-ching.

There's little to recommend about Ultor Exposed - even to players who agreed with Rob's exuberant assessment (9/10) back in October. As with many of Saints Row 2's campaign missions, the story arc feels like a by-the-numbers exercise in every sense.

Apart from wondering how Ms Patrick ended up as an ex-microbiologist working for low-life gangsters, it's a struggle to care why she's got a grudge against the Ultor Corporation. Instead you'll dive headlong into more drivin' and shootin' mayhem with nary a pause. That's why we're here, clearly.

The problem is the missions fall into dreaded openworld cliche from minute one. These sort of things may look great in edited trailers, but when it comes to actually playing the game it's the same old scene. Drive there. Shoot those guys. Drive after that truck. Shoot it. The ten minutes required to play the entire opening mission includes the time it takes to watch the cut-scene. Pulse-raising this is not.

'Saints Row 2: Ultor Exposed' Screenshot 2

Halo there, sir.

The second mission's even shorter. Unless you feel compelled to crank up the difficulty level, just seven minutes of your life will be taken up by chasing after a truck and shooting it repeatedly. After that you hop in the back for a bit of regulation on-rails shooting gallery nonsense, where an endless supply of helicopters and manic police cars line-up to be blown-up by your big gun with infinite ammo.

I would apologise for the spoilers, but anyone who has played either of the Saints Row games (or GTA-style openworld games in general for that matter) won't be surprised by the scenario. Any attempt by the developer to come up with anything remotely new is conspicuous by its absence.

By the third and final mission, you're losing the will to live. Drive to a hilltop. Shoot the nasty AI-deficient men in the face. Shoot the most hapless helicopters in the history of videogames out of the sky with a machine gun while they rain missiles on you.

OK, if you forget to avoid said missiles in time the climax can be a pain in the 36 double-Ds. But even if you're playing the game with your feet you'll eke no more than an hour out of Ultor Exposed's missions. It's little more than pointless fluff on the end of an already uninspiring campaign, where dire combat and lemming-like enemy AI conspire to make large portions of the game truly forgettable.

As with the original, there's no question that the most fun to be had in Saints Row is engaging in the many activities found scattered across the map - not to mention the diversions built into almost every square inch of the game. Shame none of this applies to Ultor Exposed, however, as Volition opted to not add any new mini-game content this time.

Elsewhere, the new competitive co-op mode is an interesting addition - assuming you have the inclination and the opportunity to play the missions through again with a companion. As you kill members and destroy vehicles during missions you'll accrue points, with extra ones for getting headshots and so on. When the mission ends, the player with the most points gets a cash bonus.

All well and good, but this mode is near enough useless to anyone who's already played the game - which will be almost everyone buying this. A minority of players will be coming to Saints Row 2 fresh, having just bought the game and the DLC, and to them it might be of interest. Real obsessives might welcome the challenge to pit themselves against like-minded obsessives - but again, they're likely to be in the minority.

'Saints Row 2: Ultor Exposed' Screenshot 3

Call up Tera on your phone and have her dispense her own special brand of justice.

So what else does Ultor Exposed have to offer? New clothing options are hardly headline material, nor are ten new hairstyles. Of far greater interest are the six new vehicles. These include the EDF Scout vehicle, complete with roof-mounted multi-rocket Annihilator, the Vulture chopper and AB the Destroyer aircraft. Then there's the crazy three-wheeled Pulse, Stallion racing car and super slick Temptress car. Fun, sure, but only of use for general sandbox play.

And finally, there are a bunch of multiplayer maps for the online community to play with. Two each for gangbang/team gangbang and the rather appealing Strongarm mode. At present, it's hard to even get a match going to test them out. Unless you're able to schedule matches within your own community, you'll struggle to get any kind of online play going.

As always with DLC reviews, the question of value for money creeps into the equation. There's no doubt that Saints Row 2: Ultor Exposed falls down badly here. With three uninspired and ludicrously short missions forming the meat of the package, it's a huge let-down. The other elements are only worth it if you haven't already played the game extensively.

It's hard to think of a reason why you'd part with good money for the limited extra entertainment offered by this DLC. There are two more downloadable packs on the way for Saints Row 2, but Volition has much to do to convince players to part with their cash next time.

5 / 10

Read the Eurogamer.net scoring policy
Picture of Kristan.

About Kristan Reed

Kristan is a former editor of Eurogamer, dad, Stone Roses bore and Norwich City supporter who sometimes mutters optimistically about Team Silent getting back together.

Read more articles from Kristan by visiting the Kristan Reed archive page.

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Comments (40) Latest comment 3 years ago

Comments threads automatically close after 30 days, but please feel free to continue chatting on the forum!

  • the_dudefather #1 3 years ago

    yeah, bit disapointing, especially for the cash required

  • Physically_Insane #2 3 years ago

    Remember when SR2 got 9/10? What was up with that?

  • DrDamn #3 3 years ago

    It's a great game marred by a shocking amount of bugs and glitches - I think maybe a patch is what they should have been concentrating on rather than poor value DLC.

  • SlackMaster #4 3 years ago

    As long as I run the game from the HDD it's fine and I've had virtually no crashes since. The DLC is questionable but as I'm still only half way through I'll be giving this a look.

  • JonFE #5 3 years ago

    "...and shockingly each mission can be romped through in around ten minutes..."

    I doubt I would last even that long -start to finish- with Tera Patrick :-)

  • spammage #6 3 years ago

    I doubt you would touch the sides........

  • Darren #7 3 years ago

    Saints Row 2 is merely an OK to good game IMO. It's very rough around the edges with serviceable visuals (at best) and has way too many bugs and glitches to be considered a classic or even worthy of EG's 9/10 if you ask me. I had numerous freezes and crashes when I played it which only served to cheapened the whole experience for me. I understand the game is just as creaky on the PC despite six months of extra development time.

    Like all sandbox games though, it proved to be addictive in the short-term and some of the mini-games are silly and fun but overall the game is more miss than hit and ultimately it's totally forgettable. I thought Saints Row was a better game personally and one I enjoyed more at the time but then it didn't really have any direct competition so it felt relatively fresh on the 360.

    GTA IV is still the king in my book, nothing else comes remotely close.

  • Vandit96 #8 3 years ago

    i don't like gta clones like this game and especially this dlc ..

  • smernicki #9 3 years ago

    tera patrick- she'd get it

  • Fodder #10 3 years ago

    What bugs do people get in the game? I've got over 40 hours on the clock and never had a single problem with it, but I've read a fair few posts and comments from people saying it's full of bugs.

    The DLC is a bit disappointing, though the EDF tank thing is great fun. Hopefully the next packs will be better.

  • danathjo #11 3 years ago

    not getting this DLC but am waiting to see if they are adding trophies (read somewhere they might be working on it) before I give it another whirl...great fun was had first run through!

  • Whizzo #12 3 years ago

    When Pandemic released the freebie add-on for Mercs 2 I played it and thought that was fun for what it was and at least it was free, this DLC isn't and it's a complete rip off.

    At times it feels like an advert for Red Faction Guerilla except you've paid 800 points/8 quid for it and it in no way justifies that. 400 points would have been pushing it.

    Oh and if I was Tera Patrick I'd be rather less than impressed with the model made of me too, it's horrendous! As are the practically non-animated cutscenes.

    Saints Row 2 itself is a very enjoyable game, this DLC appears to have been knocked up in Volition's lunch hour. Scratch that, it was probably done in about half of a lunch hour, 5/10 is pretty bloody generous!

  • 3william56 #13 3 years ago

    Gangbang and Team Gangbang mode? What sort of Gangbang *isn't* a team sport?

    So... 700 points for the t*ts, 100 points for the game.

    Doesn't exactly bode well for Red Faction does it.

  • kangarootoo #14 3 years ago

    "tera patrick- she'd get it"

    I suspect she already does.

    /insert jokes here about gangbang and team gangbang modes.

    My most disappointing, and bizarrely unexplained, moment in SR2 was finding that after the final showdown I DIDN'T end up getting the enormous skyscraper as a crib. WHAT WERE THEY THINKING?

    You could even get inside the bugger if you were handy with jumping out of a helicopter, so its not like they didn't build out the inside. I know it didn't matter really, but it would have made a nice little end reward.

  • Sonic_D #15 3 years ago

    SR2 is a great game, so much fun. Was looking forward to this DLC, but it looks a complete rip off (bought the game for £25 in the first place). So no thanks. Give it for free or 200 points.

  • jonsaan #16 3 years ago

    Saint's Row 2 deserved 9/10 it is stonkingly good fun. DLC sounds like a bit ofa let down.

  • Number1Laing #17 3 years ago

    I really dig Saints Row 2 but overall it was like two steps forward one step back from SR1. The land area was much more impressive and there is much more to it, but the game doesn't work quite as well as SR1 - a lot of the game's elements are buggy and slightly imbalanced and sort of broken. Compared to SR1, which was 100% solid start to finish, everything in that game felt awesome, a lot of stuff in SR2 are janky and rough. In that sense its more like San Andreas than anything else.

  • metalmike25 #18 3 years ago

    I think Saints Row 2 is an amazing game. It's what GTA4 should have been. If it was scored purely on fun i would give it10/10.

    Saying that, the DLC is a complete rip off

  • Atropos #19 3 years ago

    Apart from wondering how Ms Patrick ended up as an ex-microbiologist working for low-life gangsters…

    I can't disagree with the rest of the review, but I have to take umbrage with your sneering attitude towards porn-stars. If my smut-addled memory serves me right, Tera Patrick IS in fact a trained microbiologist, as well as a member of Mensa - she just found porn to be an easier life.

    So she's actually the natural, some might say only, choice to play a smoking hot ex-microbiologist with a penchant for short skirts and cock. Considering the legal grey-zone most pornpeddlers operate in, she is in fact, in real-life, an ex-microbiologist working for low-life gangsters.Horses for courses, and all that.
    Edited by 1 at 24/04/09 @ 13:29

  • Fab4 #20 3 years ago

    I once turned Mensa down, after they spelt my name incorrectly on the letter with my test scores :p

  • TheRook21 #21 3 years ago

    I realise this is a review for the 360 version but I will vent my disgust and anger here in waiting for this for the PS3 version...

    Originally when details were announced (on thq-hq.com) at the end of march the news article mentioned achievements/trophies for 360 and ps3 respectively... when the DLC was released the article relating to that just mentioned achievements (and their value).

    I went back to check the original DLC announcement story and lo and behold it had been changed removing any mention of the trophies and having the exact same details about achievements and their values...

    Fuck you THQ... fuck you in the ass!

  • photoboy #22 3 years ago

    I might get this DLC anyway, as I love SR2, it's way more fun than the overrated GTAIV. If any game could be criticised for having too many samey missions that involve driving somewhere and shooting things it's GTAIV.

  • TheRook21 #23 3 years ago

    photoboy I think the main problem with the DLC is value for money... you get fuck all for your cash...

  • smernicki #24 3 years ago

    Fuck you THQ... fuck you in the ass!

    isn't that why they got Tera Patrick onboard? LOL!

  • LittleMousy #25 3 years ago

    The price in the review is wrong - it's only £6.29 on PSN (it's €7.99).

  • berelain #26 3 years ago

    Wow, how about next time we get someone who actually *likes* the game to review the DLC? Maybe?

    Still, 3 missions does sound like a bit of a cop out.

  • Ryze #27 3 years ago

    In the dialect of my Jamaican cousins:

    T'EEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!! T'eeeef dem ah dyam t'eeeeeef!
    Edited by 1 at 24/04/09 @ 16:06

  • Widge #28 3 years ago

    SR2 sits at home unplayed at the moment as I'm hoping they're going to patch in some trophes, its unlikely that I'd want to play through the game again for them.
    Whereas I'm happily going through GTA4 again for them.
    I'm anti-fun.

  • metalangel #29 3 years ago

    Saints Row 2 has made me laugh heartily throughout the ludicrous tasks it has set me. But I never thought there'd be a DLC which would surpass Knothole Island in the rip off stakes. And Tera Patrick is nice, but she's no Sunny Lane.

  • Pastici #30 3 years ago

    Because a game doesn't add to your e-penis people refuse to play it? How did people play games before?!

  • smernicki #31 3 years ago

    Sunny Lane- going by her picture on wikipedia she looks pretty rough

  • cock #32 3 years ago

    I can't understand people complaining about generic missions in SR2 in comparison to GTAIV. They were equally bloody uninspired but SR2 at least didn't take itself so tediously seriously. I know which I had more fun with.

  • smelly #33 3 years ago

    what tells me if the EXACT same DLC was released for gta - it'd get 10/10?

    After all, the EXACT same complaints levelled against this, could be levelled against gta... but yet reviewers seem to love that and hate this..

    weird.

  • smelly #34 3 years ago

    >That makes it significantly less rubbish than the atrocious GTAIV.

    +1

    But yet reviewers LOVE it and completely ignore ALL it's faults.. And then a game comes along like this, and all of a sudden those faults are the "worst thing ever", and the game gets slated for them!

    WTF Is going on with that? One has to wonder about backhanders...

  • Harmonica #35 3 years ago

    5/10 is very generous. I played this for free and I felt ripped off on behalf of anyone who bought it.

    smernicki: "Sunny Lane- going by her picture on wikipedia she looks pretty rough"

    Yes, she's gone downhill a lot in the last few years. But if you're so inclined, she used to look absolutely drop dead gorgeous in a ex ice-skater-next-door kind of way.
    Edited by 1 at 25/04/09 @ 00:49

  • Widge #36 3 years ago

    Rubbish gameplay? One of the most talked about things I saw with GTA vs SR was 'omg, the driving!'... I finally get to step behind the wheel on SR and its like driving a dodgem! The entire thing has a plastic lightweight feel to it, couple that with the ridiculous scripting and slapstick and it completely cheapens the world and environment it presents to you. SR delivers on all the side mission fluff that went missing after San Andreas, but I'd love it if they dropped the entire rude boy gangster and slapstick stuff for any future games, otherwise it fails on delivering an immersive open world experience. To actually care and be involved in what is going on around you is a massive drive and can't be covered up by slapstick 'fun'. Something like Fallout manages to be fun, amusing yet not sacrificing itself with cheap tricks. Lets push things forward.

  • Harmonica #37 3 years ago

    I half agree. I think Saints Row got a lot of mileage out of being the pisstake crim-em-up next to GTA, but the hip hop thing is extremely old hat these days. The reason I stopped playing Saints Row 2 was because I could barely motivate myself to play on with the story, even if I enjoy the gameplay far more than GTA IV's.

    GTA IV's story and writing was poor, but Saint's Row 2's was poorer because their humour isn't very sophisticated at all.

  • Darren #38 3 years ago

    @Crofto - "Darren - "GTA IV is still the king in my book, nothing else comes remotely close. "

    I loled.

    Broken combat, rubbish gameplay and a plot that takes itself too seriously is win for you then?"

    You really don't grasp the concept of a "personal opinion" do you?

    All of those things you list are things *YOU* don't like about GTA IV but I obviously disagree with all of them. The combat was excellent (I never had any problem with it at all), the gameplay was excellent throughout, polished and above all bug-free for the entire 80+ hours I've played it thus far and the story and cutscenes are excellent with superb acting and dialogue. It's certainly a more cinematic and immersive experience than Saints Row 2 IMO. (Note, IMO = In *MY* Opinion).

    I LOLed at your response but only because it's yet another post from you declaring not one but two game as "shit" to join the ever-expanding list of other games you deem "shit/poor", which includes Oblivion, Resident Evil 5, Riddick: Assault on Dark Athena and many other popular, critically accalimed games. Sometimes I wonder if you even *like* games! ;)

  • Zebula77 #39 3 years ago

    There's a gangbang in this?!? SOLD!

  • rashy #40 3 years ago

    I have to ask after the darkfall inaccurate review, that was largly written on bias, and with disputes about the reviewer actually playing the game for any length of time can I trust this review as truth? or is this review actually written by someone with an interest in the product or an opposing one?