Lemmings Review

By Tom Bramwell Published 7 March, 2006

Die outside!

Version tested: PSP

Do Lemmings like cliffs? Sod that - do Cliffs like Lemmings? That's what I want to know. To this end, I've spent some of Sunday afternoon perched on my bed, laptop resting on my knee, Googling various strings along the lines of "Lemmings review author Cliff" and "Lemmings by Cliff" and "Sodding BY Cliff not GETTING OFF". Sadly I haven't found what I'm looking for, but I did find some fascinatingly dyslexic fan-fiction modulating between Lemming house sales and geologically informative pornography. I also happened upon a surprisingly large number of reviews of the old-days versions for PC, Amiga, Spectrum and the like. And sadly, despite the nice things Team 17 has done to the PSP one, flicking through a few of those I know I won't be able to give it such a sparkling report.

Then again, that's hardly surprising is it? It's another genius brief from the publisher that last week announced it was going to help fatten the PSP catalogue with a gang sodding warfare game. Nice one Sony. After being tossed from publisher to publisher with Worms, Team 17 must be wondering what it did to deserve all this. And to be put to work on a handheld port of a DMA Design game (in other words, Rockstar "GTA" North) must be doubly galling. Back in the days when Worms and Lemmings sat side by side on the Amiga and PC and everything-else shelves and nobody scoffed at pitching a 2D game idea, both were respectable software houses on the up, and yet here we are in 2006 and GTA rules the world while Team 17 runs the rule over a game its creators left behind yonks ago. "Don't ask anybody at DMA what their favourite game is," DMA PR man Brian Baglow told Edge once. "Is it Lemmings? No it f***ing is not!" They were tired of working on it then. In January 1997, so practically ten years ago.

'Lemmings' Screenshot suffer

How about a Worms/Lemmings crossover? Someone directs Lemmings while the other attacks with Worms kit. That'll be 15% please.

And yes, I do think I can be forgiven all this ranting because if you don't know what Lemmings is by now then hi Mum thanks for reading. It's hard to get a precise feel for how many copies Lemmings actually sold (Sony quotes 5 million "fans", others claim more many than 20 million sales in one form or other), but its cross-generational exploitation means its been tossed over the tops of more consoles than Uhura on Rohypnol. I was chatting to a friend earlier and even she'd played it, and her sphere of gaming knowledge I'd previously considered to be a bubble surrounding Sonic the Hedgehog.

Its charm is in its elegant simplicity. Little fuzzy lemmings fall out of the sky and wander to the right. As they go you can give them certain abilities and instructions - to climb, to parachute, to dig, to bridge, to stand still and reverse the direction of the lemmings behind, or just to blow themselves up. With judicious use, these functions can be used to reach an exit doorway that might be unassailably higher or splatteringly lower than the starting point - and of course the goal is to get as many lemmings as possible through without letting them perish on the way. As levels become complex and the number of times you can use a particular tool lessens, the challenge increases and pausing to scheme becomes important.

This is as true of the PSP version as it was of the Amiga back in 1991 or any other version over a decade ago. What's changed here is that you use console controls instead of a mouse to play. Team 17's solution is intuitive enough; you use the d-pad to position a cursor, which responds quickly and yet measurably enough, use the shoulder buttons to flick between your choice of tool, and X to action it. You can also zoom in and out a bit using triangle, which is useful although not essential - and it's worth pointing out that while the PSP's wide screen resolution gives you a bit more vision to left and right, it also makes for very tiny lemmings. Those of you who like to think of things in genocidal terms (PSP owners several hundred boredom-soaked quid down probably do by now) can now also enjoy splattier sound effects and a sort of Wormsy styling.

'Lemmings' Screenshot brunel

Brunel was right: bridge regulation would only stifle us.

Playing it, then, is very straightforward. Team 17 has made logical design decisions throughout: when you're obviously finished, you don't have to manually detonate 'blocker' lemmings who remain rooted to the spot; fast-forward on circle is a shift-key style affair rather than a toggle, so you can zoom through the slow bits; there's a level editor that's simple and easy to use and online download facilities that will presumably start working when the game launches (no luck with our review build, sadly).

But you know, DMA Design weren't the only people bored of this in 1997. Obviously there's a disclaimer to that. Lemmings is a charming, simple, ingenious puzzle game that deservedly built an empire (and this was before empire-building regressed to the traditional rape, pillage and then beat-them-up-in-the-alley-to-get-your-money-back model), and teasing your way through the PSP version's 150-plus levels (split between old and new ones that draw inspiration from the better of the old) is no mean feat, particularly as your memory of them's likely to be hazy by now. But we've all done Lemmings at one time or other, there's nothing new about this, and as much as it might sound like a good idea in your head it's a nostalgic itch you can scratch without spending £30 on another PSP game that makes you wonder why you ever doubted the DS would kick it all around the playground until its shiny little face was thumbsmeared to death. To be honest it's a bit sad that I have to sit here imploring you that there are better ways to spend your money than on this fine game, but then such is the PSP, really.

Still got Google open? Type "play lemmings" and scratch yourself that way instead. For pity's sake, you can play this in DHTML.

6 / 10

Read the Eurogamer.net scoring policy
Picture of Tom.

About Tom Bramwell

Tom is Operations director of Eurogamer Network and Editor-at-Large of Eurogamer.net. He joined the company in February 2000.

Read more articles from Tom by visiting the Tom Bramwell archive page.

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Comments (92) Latest comment 6 years ago

Comments threads automatically close after 30 days, but please feel free to continue chatting on the forum!

  • oneiros #1 6 years ago

    "its been tossed over the tops of more consoles than Uhura on Rohypnol"

    Genuine LOL

  • krudster #2 6 years ago

    I'm sure people can read between the lines that this is a fine port of a classic game, and if that's what you want, you won't be disappointed.

  • septimus #3 6 years ago

    ^ Agreed. Touch of DS Fanboyism going on.

    Though, at least you know what the review for worms on 'both' platforms should read like.

  • Hicksy #4 6 years ago

    Seems a bit harsh to me :o

    I thought there would be more criticism of the game mechanics more than the fact that it is a overused franchise

    /shrugs

  • trevd72 #5 6 years ago

    i have lemmings and lemmings 2 on my psp in emulator form. is this any better than those??

  • smoison #6 6 years ago

    If they sold this for a descent price there would be no need to pirate...

  • Genji #7 6 years ago

    Call me a fanboy or whatever, but this would've been a great DS game, if it had some decent stylus controls.

  • Kurai #8 6 years ago

    very bitter Tom..very bitter. you need some sleep

  • #9 6 years ago

    Should Lemmings be a fitting metaphor for the PSP?!?

    :-0

  • Khab #10 6 years ago

    Interestingly enough, I got real excited the other week about this, to the point of thinking "Maybe it IS time to get yourself a PSP, Khab...". Then I followed some link to the aforementioned DHTML-version, played that for circa 7 minutes, and then went "Meh". So I think Tom may well have a point.

  • #11 6 years ago

    pretty much any puzzle game can be done in DHMTL, so I don't think that point is really relevant tbh. That was what I was getting at.

    FWIW, I think many of the puzzle games on DS/PSP are WAY overated. Bought both Zoo keeper/Lumines. Got rid of both pretty quickly.

    Won't speak ill of GB tetris though - at least that came (largely) free with the machine.

  • kangarootoo #12 6 years ago

    "than Uhura on Rohypnol"

    Its a clever word play I'll give you that, but is a joke about a date rape drug really something the staff should be including in their text? I'd suggest not.
    Edited by 1 at 07/03/06 @ 09:31

  • Danj #13 6 years ago

    "for pity's sake, you can play this in DHTML"

    Yes, but is it in WIDESCREEN? Haven't all previous Lemmings versions been formatted for 4:3? Does the fact that it's widescreen on the PSP make no difference? (e.g. did they just chop off the top and bottom instead of making it so you can see more of the horizontal play area)

  • Zero_ #14 6 years ago

    I agree that the PSP isn't the greatest of systems, but come on man. Attacking the PSP, and then praising the DS in a review for a game?

  • wolfen #15 6 years ago

    6/10 seems to be a fair score for those who played the game in its heyday, but what's the score for those who never played it ? The review looks mostly a "it's old and can be played for free" rant.
    Edited by 1 at 07/03/06 @ 09:50

  • MysteriousJeff #16 6 years ago

    @Krudster
    It's a review - people shouldn't have to read between the lines. Come on now...

  • Teeth #17 6 years ago

    Wow, Tom is as disappointed with the PSP as I am. Didn't think it was possible.

  • Genji #18 6 years ago

    "6/10 seems to be a fair score for those who played the game in its heyday, but what's the score for those who never played it ?"

    The score is... read another review!

  • smelly #19 6 years ago

    So when the DS web browser gets launched, i can play this for free? Using the stylus?

    Ace-a-mondo.

  • kangarootoo #20 6 years ago

    "What does it mean by read between the lines"

    It means someone doesn't explain something openly. Rather they hint at certain things and leave the reader to work out what they really mean.

  • krudster #21 6 years ago

    /waves.

  • smoison #22 6 years ago

    But this is bettre then Luminese, which in my opinoin is a pile of crap.

    The only fun puzzle game is Tetris.

  • kangarootoo #23 6 years ago

    People, help me out here. Whenever I've looked for games online I go the same old places, but then somoene pops up with a URL for a company that I've not heard of that has much better prices (such as was the case with my recent Psychonauts purchase).

    One of my housemates bought a 360, so we now have one in the house and I didn't have to buy it \o/. So, who has a great URL for an XB360 game retailer with a sub £40 pre-order tag on Oblivion. There's a shiny cyber apple for the lucky reader that writes in :)

  • kangarootoo #24 6 years ago

    @AlMcD

    Clsoe the door on the way out won't you.

  • tiddles #25 6 years ago

    @ kangarootoo Choices Direct - £37.99

    I used Games Tracker, which lets you search for games and compare prices from online retailers.

  • El_MUERkO #26 6 years ago

    if that review was a post on the forums i'd flame it as a DS fanboi rant againist a perfectly good game, sad really

    I've played the review code, the game works well on the PSP, the widescreen, targeting, zoom and pause allow you to target the the lemming you want when perfect timing is needed and the download content means unlimited lemmings for your PSP
    Edited by 1 at 07/03/06 @ 10:51

  • tonynibbles #27 6 years ago

    <A HREF="http:/ /www.google.co.uk/search?q=PLAY+LEMMINGS">PLAY LEMMINGS</A>

  • Genji #28 6 years ago

    /runs after AIMcD

    COME BAAAAAACK!!! I NEEED YOU!!!!

    WHY GOD? WHY DID YOU HAVE TO TAKE HIM?

    *cries*

  • Eraser #29 6 years ago

    It's sad to see a game receive a low score simply because it's not an original title. It makes for very awkward game buying decisions. I decided not to buy Rayman for the DS because it received low scores everywhere, but upon closer inspection, pretty much every review wrote that it was a pretty solid game but that it got slammed for doing absolutely nothing new. Like I care as never-having-played-rayman-before person. I still haven't bought the game though, as other games caught my attention.

    Lemmings is a fantastic little game. Has always been. Apparantly, the execution of the game Lemmings, as-is, has been done superbly. Why give this a 6 then. I don't own a PSP but I do own a DS and I certainly wouldn't mind seeing a Lemmings incarnation on that one. I'm going to buy Worms for it as well, even though it's probably nothing new.

    So I'd say that Lemmings on the PSP should receive at least a 7 or 8 and on the DS, given the fact that input is a lot better with the stylus, it should get a 9.

  • spadge #30 6 years ago

    Subjective - that's most reviews for you. But seldom have we seen a review based on the marketplace/platforms rather than the title in question, so this one is a bit harder than most to take on the chin without kicking off. (Not that I have a reputation for kicking off, but still...)

    The thing we do find "galling" is the assumption that someone would think we'd (as in T17) be pissed off working with a world reknown franchise and bringing to a platform we actually hold very dear - and as gamers, we're keen to bring something that's obviously perfectly suited to the PSP. In future, please review what we've produced and what we've obviously poured a lot of care into - not what you think we're thinking whilst making it - because quite frankly, you're miles off.

    We had a CHOICE to develop Lemmings, we weren't forced to do it. We really enjoyed re-developing it (not porting, btw) and tried to re-enthuse everything that was right about the original, in a modern remake - kinda like a new King Kong film.

    The only consolation we take from this is at least the comments back up what we felt reading it too.

    Thanks Kristen for your comment, but as it stands, it's a cynical hard-core review for cynical hard-core gamers. Lemmings is a casual game, built for a casual market on a casual-led platform - it's just a pity it was seemingly reviewed in a casual way too.

    (And that's also avoiding the point that the reviewer obviously has an issue with the target platform more than the game itself - but I didn't want to draw more DS v PSP grumbles).
    Edited by 1 at 07/03/06 @ 11:08

  • Genji #31 6 years ago

    Lemmings was bloody difficult - I wouldn't call it a casual game.

  • El_MUERkO #32 6 years ago

    well said spadge ... except for the 'kinda like a new King Kong film' bit, the new one is pants where as lemmings is good

    @ TK421

    It was adapted to the PSP with ease, in a perfect world you could use the DS thingy with it but its still easy to use on the later more difficult levels
    Edited by 1 at 07/03/06 @ 11:05

  • spadge #33 6 years ago

    It's perfectly suited to the PSP in the nature of the game and how it's composed. The interface is irrelevent when playing, mouse or not. People's assumption that this will play like a dog without a mouse are really wide of the mark. Anyway, just try the demo for yourself when/if you get chance.

    We've also made the game much more forgiving than the original - which was tough because games WERE hard core back then.

  • MrAtheist #34 6 years ago

    Team17 flipping out over reviews...how completely unexpected! ;)

  • SeesThroughAll #35 6 years ago

    Extremely biased review from a DS fanboy who seems to carry his own nostalgia for the GameBoy days. The low score had been decided long before so much as loading the UMD.

    there's nothing new about this

    Why, oh, WHY is that a problem now??
    Level editor, anyone? Was this even covered? With more than three words, I mean.

    ...as much as it might sound like a good idea in your head it's a nostalgic itch you can scratch without spending £30 on another PSP game that makes you wonder why you ever doubted the DS would kick it all around the playground until its shiny little face was thumbsmeared to death.

    Double standards for classics, methinks.

    For pity's sake, you can play this in DHTML.

    Like Bill Door pointed out:

    Lumines too. Should you lower it's score now?
    Tetris too. Let's see if that makes a difference for the Tetris DS review.

    @Genji:
    Call me a fanboy or whatever, but this would've been a great DS game, if it had some decent stylus controls.

    And I think they probably made the controls streamlined enough to make it enjoyable on the PSP. The game looks good for either platform.

    @Eraser:

    Lemmings is a fantastic little game. Has always been. Apparantly, the execution of the game Lemmings, as-is, has been done superbly. Why give this a 6 then. I don't own a PSP but I do own a DS and I certainly wouldn't mind seeing a Lemmings incarnation on that one. I'm going to buy Worms for it as well, even though it's probably nothing new.

    Bless you for your open mind.

  • kangarootoo #36 6 years ago

    Yay!

    Thanks tiddles.

  • tiddles #37 6 years ago

    /scrunch

  • Daikon #38 6 years ago

    OH NO!

  • Roamer #39 6 years ago

    I enjoyed Lemmings a lot a long time ago, I played on the SNES I think, and although it seems to have aged gracefully although if you ask me, any game which has been done to death should be marked down accordingly with each "new" iteration - nevermind that last release was 10 years ago. In fact, especially if the last iteration came out 10 years ago. Read the review, don't focus too much on the score, in this case it seems justified when you've actually taken a gander at the text in question.

    As for the whole PSP vs. DS thing, it seems that almost every news item, review or preview at Eurogamer provokes a massive reaction from a minority of very vocal fanboys - or "platform impaired" if you will - so this comes as no surprise. Apparently, it's just an unfortunate side-effect of Eurogamer staffers' tendency to embellish and humourize otherwise plain pieces. Furthermore, reviews here are usually a tad more subjective than those of other games sites struggling to adhere to the concept of an objective, or universal game enjoyment scale.

    @ Spadge: Calm down, mate. I think it was a reasonable, and quite interesting assumption to make, considering the strength of the respective brands.

    Edit: Silly wording.
    Edited by 1 at 07/03/06 @ 11:33

  • smelly #40 6 years ago

    I was going to pipe in and accuse psp owners of being a bit sad and pathetic and not looking at the review subjectively.

    But then I read the review again, and i kind of see your point.

    Overly harsh me thinks, I liked the originals on the pc. I cant see myself playing it on a controller rather than mouse, but that's just me.

  • joey #41 6 years ago

    umm I was a bit surprised at the tone of the review. Taken out of context it looks like a simple case of PSP bashing. I think the issue is that while the DS has it's fair share of this type of game (re-hash of a 'classic'), it also has many good quality original titles, something which the PSP lacks.

    Comments here about Worms are fair, however, I think Tetris DS will be a different story. It looks like there will be many ways to play and the multiplayer options have been well implemented. If it was just going to be Tetris in colour with a nasty bit of 'touching' nailed on, then naff it would be.

    I think that Sony really need to get stuck into some game dev for the PSP, but it seems to still be selling despite the software....

  • HolyJebus #42 6 years ago

    I don't see everyone's problem with calling Tom and co Fanboys. They have every console under the sun and play far more games then any of us so who better to judge if a console is better then another. I think its quite clear to anyone with half a brain that the DS has a better selection of games available for it then the PSP. I'm sure the PSP will get much better, but for now, the games supply simply isn't good enough. Just like the 360, which i'm sure ye are the first ones to start complaining about the supply of games. Just fupping realx everyone. I don't see why people stay with the site if they just complain so much. There's plenty of other sites ye can go to you know.

  • PearOfAnguish #43 6 years ago

    With Spadge here it's like the 90's all over again. Special prize for the first person to point out that an Amiga is used to do the FX for Babylon 5.

  • Genji #44 6 years ago

    @Pear

    You... gave yourself a prize? How very sad.

    ;-)

  • PearOfAnguish #45 6 years ago

    An Amiga was only used in the pilot of B5, the actual series used SGI workstations.

    Young man, you are going to be getting some very angry letters indeed.

  • Furbs #46 6 years ago

    Still got Google open? Type "play lemmings" and scratch yourself that way instead. For pity's sake, you can play this in DHTML

    Yeah, thats useful for a *portable* games console. Nice one Tom.

  • Eighthours #47 6 years ago

    Hiya spadge:

    and as gamers, we're keen to bring something that's obviously perfectly suited to the PSP.

    With all due respect, I question your "perfectly suited" statement. Given the controls used in the game it's far more suited to the DS, surely?

    As for the review itself, I'm surprised that Tom didn't mention the "when you pause the game you can still move the cursor" ruination that was present in preview builds. I assume that this horrific design decision is still in the final version?

    Whether a concession to the controls or not, it rips the heart out of the game when you can pause not only before making decisions but also when acting on them.

  • smelly #48 6 years ago

    Yeah, thats useful for a *portable* games console. Nice one Tom.

    Well if you have the psp or ds web browser.. then Yes.. it is.

    Especially on ds.. using stylus as mouse :-)

  • smelly #49 6 years ago

    I'm surprised that Tom didn't mention the "when you pause the game you can still move the cursor" ruination that was present in preview builds. I assume that this horrific design decision is still in the final version?


    Eh?? You could do that in the original??

    Dont believe me? Go back and play it!

  • Kurai #50 6 years ago

    Eighthours......those comments made you look daft

    No 1. Lemmings is a Sony licence. so your'e hardly going to see it on DS whether its better suited or not.

    No.2. You could assign abilities during paused play in previous lemmings games. This isnt a new feature. Check it out

  • Furbs #51 6 years ago

    ^^^^
    He's right :)

    smelly, sadly I find wifi access to be a little bit "patchy" when travelling by train or if I'm on holiday in some remote area.
    Edited by 1 at 07/03/06 @ 12:36

  • Eighthours #52 6 years ago

    Eh?? You could do that in the original??

    Dont believe me? Go back and play it!

    Eh? Which version? The Edge preview in particular was citing this as a new and unforgivable abomination!

    Perhaps back in the day I wasn't as resourceful! :)

  • Eighthours #53 6 years ago

    Eighthours......those comments made you look daft

    No 1. Lemmings is a Sony licence. so your'e hardly going to see it on DS whether its better suited or not.

    I'm well aware of that, I was commenting on the PSP being supposedly the perfect platform for the game when, control wise, it isn't.

  • Furbs #54 6 years ago

    Edge in "talking bollocks" shocker!

    I can guarantee 100% it was in the original Amiga version (infact most reviews highlighted it and said what a great idea it was). I cant see that it wouldnt be in the console versions either.

  • Teeth #55 6 years ago

    "As for the review itself, I'm surprised that Tom didn't mention the "when you pause the game you can still move the cursor" ruination that was present in preview builds. I assume that this horrific design decision is still in the final version?"

    lol! Why would that ruin the game? Oh no, the player's allowed to think and plan ahead! His brain is allowed to work while the game is paused! This is a disaster!

  • smelly #56 6 years ago

    Edge is talking crap, you could always move your cursor in the original when it was paused.

    And quite frankly if you dont have a mouse, that's even MORE important feature!

  • Teeth #57 6 years ago

    Well, if you can move the cursor when it's paused then there's no need for a mouse. Surely.

  • Eighthours #58 6 years ago

    lol! Why would that ruin the game? Oh no, the player's allowed to think and plan ahead! His brain is allowed to work while the game is paused! This is a disaster!

    Pausing to plan ahead/take a break is cool. However, being able to highlight individual lemmings while paused, and then unpause before pausing again immediately and working out what to do next, takes away from the essence of the game. IMO.

  • Teeth #59 6 years ago

    OK, the frantic panic to get the lemmings to do your bidding before they threw themselves off the cliff. I can see that, that's fair enough. I think it's unfair to expect the player to have to deal with that pressure without a pointing device though. It'd just be frustrating. Apologies for the tone of the above post :)

  • Eighthours #60 6 years ago

    Don't play it like that then. Simple eh?

    In Elite 2 you could pause the game and target enemy ships whilst paused. Didn't ruin that game.

    Lord, let me not give into temptation! ;)

  • smelly #61 6 years ago

    @Teeth : I think you're agreeing with me arent you?

    That if you dont have a mouse, being able to pause to get accurate control of a lemming seems a sensible idea.

    That said im still 99.999999% sure that you could pause and select in the original. In fact, i'm off to grab an emulator to make sure.

  • Teeth #62 6 years ago

    Ah yes, I see now. Yes, then, I was agreeing with you :)

  • spadge #63 6 years ago

    Yes you could :-)

  • Artemus #64 6 years ago

    This pause 'issue', talk about making a mountain out of a molehill.

  • Furbs #65 6 years ago

    So, spadge....Worms, Live Arcade, when? :)

    I'll hand over muchos Microsoft points to you if you do it. Oh and a new Alien Breed using the Doom/Quake engine please. What do you mean it costs money?

  • evade #66 6 years ago

    "The Edge preview in particular was citing this as a new and unforgivable abomination!"

    What edge talking crap?!? Nooo!

  • Feanor #67 6 years ago

    "Its a clever word play I'll give you that, but is a joke about a date rape drug really something the staff should be including in their text? I'd suggest not."

    And why is that? Are videogame websites like videogames and only meant for under 12s?

  • Teeth #68 6 years ago

    I don't think anyone reading that is likely to go and buy rohypnol and rape a navigator as a result.

  • tiddles #69 6 years ago

    In Elite 2 you could pause the game and target enemy ships whilst paused. Didn't ruin that game.

    No, the game was quite good enough at ruining itself on its own, thankyou very much.

    /runs

  • Eraser #70 6 years ago

    "I'm sure the PSP will get much better, but for now, the games supply simply isn't good enough."

    HolyJebus, that's simply way beyond the scope of the review of a single game. Even if the entire lineup of the PSP sucks that doesn't mean this game would suck as well.

  • Spaz_Winchester #71 6 years ago

    I'm sorry that in this day and age there are still clearly silly little boys allowed to "soap box" in a fan boy manner rather than write a review about the actual game in point.

    The reviewer is clearly a f**king clownshoe, incapapble of impartiatlity. A quality clearly required when reviewing across a range of platforms. I'd suggest you get back to trawling fansites and flame away there. In the meantime let someone without bias do the job you're clearly not capapble of.

    As for the game itself, well you could play the demo as and when it becomes available and decide for yourself.

  • kangarootoo #72 6 years ago

    @Feanor

    "And why is that? Are videogame websites like videogames and only meant for under 12s?"

    What, you think jokes about rape are "adult"? I personally find them pretty childish. The joke was of the sort I might expect to overhear down the pub, not read in a review written by a professional journalist.

    @Teeth
    "I don't think anyone reading that is likely to go and buy rohypnol and rape a navigator as a result."

    I am not suggesting anything of the sort. I just think that jokes about rape are a bit in bad taste.


    My point was that I found the joke somewhat out of place. If I had read it in these threads I would have thought it ar for the course. But to read it in an actual review puts the writer in poor light IMHO.

  • tengu #73 6 years ago

    EG reviews that take the piss are like sex with Mike Tyson. You can kick and scream all you want, but... it's gonna happen.

  • Teeth #74 6 years ago

    Furry muff.

  • kentmonkey #75 6 years ago

    @ HolyJebus "Why do people moan all the time, go somewhere else" comment:

    It's called constructive feedback mate. Nobody (well bar one) has actually gone on the attack at Tom, they've just left honest constructive feedback that they thought that the review was under-par, came across very fanboyish at times and didn't really say an awful lot about how the game played on the PSP, not enough for my tastes anyway. It was more like something I'd expect to see in a reader review, if I'm being honest.

    Now, "why don't I go somewhere else"? Well because 99.9% of the time Tom's reviews are some of the best in the business. He's produced some absolute gems (Call of Duty for me - the one with the soldiers diary was one of the best I've ever read) and the site is great. Does it mean we all have to bow down and kiss his feet for every review, no it doesn't. When Tom produces a poor review it's a rare occassion so please, let us provide constructive feedback when it does happen and let those that want to give him a kicking for it do it, as they very rarely get the chance. If Tom's half the professional he comes across as being, then he'll take the feedback on the chin and either learn from it or disagree quietly. I don't see him moaning about people moaning (about people who are moaning about people moaning)........er.......you get what I mean.

    /kisses Tom's feet

    "mmmm, cheesy Wotsit flavour"

    Edited as I'd used the wrong name! :o) Doh!
    Edited by 1 at 07/03/06 @ 20:00

  • muzzer77 #76 6 years ago

    This is novice in its construction. This bloke should be working for official xbox 360 magazine because he would fit right in as they are quick to slag other platforms as well. By the way not everybody thinks gameboys in whatever carnation are good. I was looking for a decent review of this game. looks like i should go elsewhere.

  • tiddles #77 6 years ago

    see ya, wouldn't wanna BE ya...

  • tiddles #78 6 years ago

    kentmonkey - do you mean Mugwum, not Murbal?

  • kentmonkey #79 6 years ago

    Tiddles, I did indeed, amended now! :o) I keep doing that as well!

  • Larkhill Jo #80 6 years ago

    What would be interesting is if the reviewer came on here and explained what his points are? I can’t work out if this is a review of the PSP line up or a game review?

  • Rodafowa #81 6 years ago

    I never, ever get tired of people who start off comments making lofty, academic-sounding statements like...

    "This is novice in its construction."

    ...and then go on to make some hilariously blatant typo at some point in their next two sentences. Particularly if the blunder conjures up the image of a handheld console built into a popular buttonhole bloom, such as...

    "By the way not everybody thinks gameboys in whatever carnation are good."

    It's irony on a pretty base level, I realise, but it's still a hoot.

  • Kurai #82 6 years ago

    Its a full 13 hours since i stared open jawed at this review this morning, spitting my coffee across my desk in the process. So i thought i'd come back to it again and see if i really had missed Toms point, or perhaps i hadnt sufficiently 'read between the lines' as Kristan suggested.

    But nope...it really is a terribly written review!

    Its unprofessional, biased, petty and sniping, and as someone mentioned earlier it does come across as a reader review. Whats amazing is fully 3/4 of the text seems to be taken up by spleen venting with barely a nod to the actual job of reviewing the game! Hopefully this is a blip on an otherwise excellent record, a bad day at the office or an argument with a girl/boyfriend the night before that was brought into work. On the whole i usually rate Toms reviewing opinions very highly, just not this time..at all.

    What i really cant understand on re-reading it is why its so bad for a company to release an updated version of a well loved title for a new generation on a new portable gaming machine? There will be many PSP owners out there whom were too young to catch Lemmings first time around. But then Tom argues that lemmings can be played for free, and thats true, but it cant be taken with you on the bus, to school, or to work. Levels cant be created and shared, and it certainly never looked this good...so why the vitriole? whats the real agenda here?

    I dont want to get into the Sony Vs Nintendo mud slinging as Tom did, but dont both companies do the same thing? Isnt Mariokart an equally loved franchise thats seen many re-releases of the same slightly improved game? Maybe you could argue Mariokart is a more worthy game to update, but the bottom line remains the same, its a re-release of a decade old game. (I own all the versions of Mariokart btw so dont peg me as a Nintendo hater!)

    Anyway, thats my feelings. hopefully normal service will resume and Tom will remember he's not doing the Student Union newsletter anymore and get back to being a professional journalist as soon as possible.
    Edited by 3 at 07/03/06 @ 22:11

  • DocTep #83 6 years ago

    ^
    Kurai said it all really.

    Tom's worst review ever? Quite likely.

    The actual game was hardly reviewed at all. A 'professional game review' is no place to get into fanboy territory, or to work off a bad temper - whichever one it happens to be. I expected more from someone like Tom.

  • Teeth #84 6 years ago

    Really? I thought most of Tom's reviews were like this... and thought most people would be used to it by now :)

  • SeesThroughAll #85 6 years ago

    It seems to be difficult getting used to the notion that reviews are nowadays becoming another form of astroturfing... oh well...

  • Feanor #86 6 years ago

    Very good post, Kurai. It'd be nice if Tom could explain why his review was such bitter nonsense instead of a proper review of the game.

  • BBIAJ #87 6 years ago

    Bollocks to the review, I'm still buying this!

  • tiddles #88 6 years ago

    No good games on PSP

  • Arwin #89 6 years ago

    I add my vote to the 'boot Tom' camp. My goodness - I'm starting to get the impression that writing sarcastic, Top Gear style articles is the only requirement for getting your reviews on this site these days. It is really going down the drain. :(

  • oerhoert #90 6 years ago

    Um... Is it just me or did he actually give the game a 6? Isn't that seen as a good score anymore? Why are all the people angry?

  • SeesThroughAll #91 6 years ago

    Um... Is it just me or did he actually give the game a 6? Isn't that seen as a good score anymore? Why are all the people angry?

    The review is pretty much a rant against Lemmings which does not say actually much about the game in itself, and concludes with a rant against the PSP, along with praises to the DS. So, that 6 feels a bit on the low side.
    Edited by 1 at 11/04/06 @ 22:14

  • Chicony_G #92 6 years ago

    Hello! If you're looking for Lemmings check out this website: download Lemmings. This website contains also some overviews and screenshots.