Monster Madness Review

Zombies ate my gameplay.

Version tested: Xbox 360

There's a moment in the first Charlie's Angels film, that underrated and (literally and figuratively) flab-less movie, when Drew Barrymore tumbles semi-naked from the sky into a suburban garden. Two young teenage boys are sat playing Final Fantasy VIII in the front room inside. As they catch sight of her unexpected curves through the double-glazing, the pair pause the game and stare, mouths agog, as this fallen angel slinks off into the night and their forthcoming puberty-soaked dreams.

It's unusual that Hollywood would choose this videogame to illustrate the scene for two reasons. Firstly because, y'know, it's not actually a two-player game and secondly because, regardless of Final Fantasy VIII's merits, a JRPG is probably not representative of what the average non-game playing movie-goer imagines a typical videogame to look and play like.

Despite Wii Sports' educational stabs at the mainstream consciousness, videogames remain, in the minds of the uninitiated populace, hyperactive experiences for kids with short attention spans. They're about little cartoony characters running about dementedly, killing one another in gruesome and repetitive ways. Ask the average Joe what happens in most videogames and they'll probably talk of running over zombies in big-wheeled cars, of maiming axe-murderers with sawn-off shotguns, hurled trash cans and big swords; of a juvenile symphony of camp destruction and brainless button-mashing.

'Monster Madness' Screenshot 1

Games exactly like Monster Madness then.

This is a big, dumb videogame; a relic from the mash-the-buttons scrolling beat 'em ups of the early nineties, so obvious and clichéd that a non-gamer might have written its core design document from their vague and imprecise knowledge of what games should look and play like. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing because, like Charlie's Angels, big, dumb things, when executed with flair and wit and self-depreciation, can be good and fun. But, while this game aims in that direction, it mostly falls short.

Monster Madness' limited narrative is revealed through a series of well-drawn and animated comic book strips. They tell the story (poorly) of four different high school stereotypes - the geek, the normal, the cheerleader and the self-harming goth girl - who find themselves in each other's company at the moment of a zombie invasion. Actually, 'zombie invasion' is far too limited a description of this crisis which features, over the course of the game's twenty levels and five chapters, over seventy schlock horror antagonists. Vampires rub shoulders with Mummies, UFOs, Giant Spiders and Evil Clowns, all of which must be defeated as you and up to three of your friends hack, slash and gun your way through suburbia in search of a conclusion.

'Monster Madness' Screenshot 2

The first level, set in geek boy Zach's house, presents an overwhelming number of items and traps, which can be picked up with the X button and used against the undead intruders. Lamp-stands can be hurled, kitchen knives stabbed or you can simply flick the 'on' switch of your father's lawn-mower and send it eagerly into the pursuing hordes. This concert of adolescent destruction is headlined by a boss who, once defeated, sets you upon your top-down viewed, scrolling path through the game.

After the game's introductory and self-contained level you'll become much more reliant upon your default melee and projectile weapons, which, in the case of our main character, Carrie, took the form of a glinting katana and a handmade nail-gun. Hundreds of items are scattered through each level which must be collected and traded in at Larry Tools' trailer, a biker-style mobile shop which crops up a couple of times during each level. Larry can supply your character with a vast number of Heath Robinson-esque weaponry (as well as bullets and health), which he builds from the items you've collected. The wide range of weaponry is generous but unnecessary, as you'll just need one or two key weapons, which can be switched between quickly in battle. Once you've settled on your favourites the need to explore levels in search of new items is gone and you'll soon just stick to the main paths.

The controls, while relatively few in number, are unwieldy and awkward. Clicking in the right stick lets you jump, a strange mapping decision that makes negotiating the occasional platform segment of a level a chore. The two triggers control your primary and secondary weapons and while this works well, scrolling through different weapons is inefficiently handled with the bumpers and face buttons. As there's no auto-lock feature, shooting at the fast and furious enemies is often a frustration on anything above the lowest of the game's four difficulty levels.

This aiming problem is exacerbated many times over when joined by other players (who can drop in locally at any time) as the camera tugs in different directions to accommodate each player's independent movements. Indeed, the game's difficulty quickly becomes a serious problem, especially for the solo player. On the default setting we got stuck on a couple of later levels, enduring a kind of red-hot infuriation not experienced for many years. Thanks to the sparsely populated checkpoint system and a ridiculous number of quick and hard enemies the hack and slashing becomes quickly overwhelming. Inexplicably it's impossible to save the game at a checkpoint and, with some levels taking over half an hour to complete, getting stuck on a final boss half an hour in with no option to save your progress is an anachronistic and unnecessary pain.

'Monster Madness' Screenshot 3

The core game mechanics are cluttered by numerous extra conceits which, rather than making the game more fun, simply make it untidy and unfocused while revealing its core weaknesses. 'Monster Fest' areas close the player in requiring you defeat a certain number of enemies before you're allowed to progress. At one point you're required to score five basketball three-pointers in a school playground while you aim is constantly being knocked off by the relentless assaults of some voracious demons. These ideas are interesting but the clunky execution means they're never much fun. Various vehicle sections also mix up the repetition and everything from Swan Boats, ATVs, Tanks and Mechas can be appropriated to the cause. However, the control of each is generally poor, and so these sections are also frustrating. Even when the controls are good, such as in the mechas (pleasingly made out of an old VW Beatle) the tasks you're given to perform (such as searching through a junkyard for specific pieces of scrap metal) lack pizzazz.

'Monster Madness' Screenshot 4

It's not all bad though. The animation throughout is full of character; the soundtrack is solid and occasionally brave (one level is soundtracked by a solitary soulful cello). Character design is varied and imaginative (the gruesome 'fat zombie' - who dies of a heart attack when sufficiently riled - looks as if it's the disgusting brainchild of Dante and H R Giger). In two-player co-op, with a competent friend the game works well although, with any more participants than this it becomes simply too cluttered and confusing.

Nevertheless this is nineties videogame cliché; an unrelenting gangbang of tired mechanics presented in mostly derivative clothing. The script, dialogue and voice acting grasp for irony but only manage weak cliché. That the game doesn't offer an online campaign mode is disastrous, an oversight the 'king-of-the-hill', 'capture the flag' etc other stock online modes fail to compensate for. In what appears to be an effort to stave off criticism that the game is unimaginative, the designers have sought to add diverse extra ideas to freshen the classic mechanics. But that these fail to work elegantly only serves to bring attention to the core game's mediocrity rather than shroud it.

5 / 10

Read the Eurogamer.net scoring policy

Comments (36) Latest comment 4 years ago

Comments threads automatically close after 30 days, but please feel free to continue chatting on the forum!

  • Feet #1 5 years ago

    :(

    Where are the screenie captions gone?
  • MrBiggles #2 5 years ago

    Why not just give us the superior Zombies ate my neighbours?, oh yeah I forgot Xbox live arcade is not allowed to have good games.
  • Mildew #3 5 years ago

    Demo said it all really. Lets have a proper next- gen Zombies Ate My Neighbours!
  • Fyzzu #4 5 years ago

    Lies. XBLA has many fun things.

    I was thinking along the same lines, though. Bit of a shame this doesn't match up to the sheer joy of Zombies.
  • jonsaan #5 5 years ago

    Couldn't you level the whole ' no new ideas' at almost any game you review?
  • Monkey_Puncher #6 5 years ago

    Demo was awful, not having online story co-op makes it even worse. I thought at least that might be a slightly redeeming feature that'd make it worth picking up when it hits the bargain bin. I guess it's not worth even £10 afterall...

    Oh and yeah I'd love to see Zombie ate my Neighbours on XBLA, I won't even bother writing a proper reply to Biggles "No good games on XBLA" post though..
  • souljacker2000 #7 5 years ago

    damn i really wanted this..

    /sticks finger up at MM
  • snick #8 5 years ago

    Sure i saw Zombies ate my neighbours on a wii VC list somewhere. Personally, I can't wait.
  • Darkedge #9 5 years ago

    Demo was shite lookslike game is no better.

    Watch it rise to the top of the charts like FIFA and Sims then :/
  • Rirekon #10 5 years ago

    Found the demo really dull and irritating
  • RedPanda #11 5 years ago

    Post deleted at 14:31:59 28-01-2012
  • Azazel #12 5 years ago

    Where are the screenie captions gone?

    Where have the screenie captions gone?

    Muahaha!

    /changes to bat form and flies off into the night
  • kangarootoo #13 5 years ago

    Played the demo of this. Was more frustrating than fun unfortunately. Talk about a cluttered game area. Picking up a new weapon was a job all in itself.
  • Les #14 5 years ago

    “damn i really wanted this..”

    On what grounds exactly did you really want this? Because the name sounded cool or something?
  • souljacker2000 #15 5 years ago

    NO Les... give me a little more respect than that

    Just looked like a laugh

    /goes to order Hail to the chimp
  • asphaltcowboy #16 5 years ago

    Demo was awful - forget two or more players, it was cluttered with just me! Controls were shambolic, most of the time I just ran around not being able to attack anything!
  • Darth_Flibble #17 5 years ago

    are the developers stupid? also they had to do was copy Zombies ate my neighbours and add 4 player over Live (main mission) and new graphics and they would of made crap loads of money
  • Garulon #18 5 years ago

    Rule number 1) If the game's name features the words "Challenge" or "Madness" or even worse is alliterative, it's going to be terrible.
  • Les #19 5 years ago

    “NO Les... give me a little more respect than that

    Just looked like a laugh”

    No disrespect intended, just wondered as the previews of this game weren’t exactly full of praise. I usually want a game after I’ve checked a number of reviews to see if there’s anything that I’d enjoy, that’s all.
  • Machetazo #20 5 years ago

    "Clicking in the right stick lets you jump, a strange mapping decision that makes negotiating the occasional platform segment of a level a chore."

    If you're a completionist (wha, they still exist!) then you'll certainly have to negotiate platforms to collect junk to make weapons.
    I haven't really HAD to yet, to progress, but I'm trying to collect all that I can so I have been - you do have a left stick button "pounce" though that can help you make the larger gaps, btw, Mr. Parkin.

    I've been enjoying playing this so far. I've just defeated GRANNY, (love the design of that boss, lol) so I haven't gotten too far.
    Those Monster Fests can be painful though, since you can't save and they're usually situated a fair distance into a level - though there's usually a full health restoring Jolt dispenser fairly close, to the impromptu arena. Monster amulets can help a lot in those perilous sections. You definitely couldn't release MM on Live Arcade, no way. It's just too vast.

    Zack's House (played in the demo) is just very unrepresentative of the wider game.
    The game, not flawless by any stretch, I am having good fun with, so I'm glad I stuck with my instinct on this. Rest assured, once I've got some serious progress on this under my belt, my first reader review may well follow. You went with Carrie, too, I see. Did you try any of the others? It's just, in the review, you kind of implied that playing as the other characters, would result in different weapons being made available...Is that the case?
  • Xerx3s #21 5 years ago

    Why not just give us the superior Zombies ate my neighbours?, oh yeah I forgot Xbox live arcade is not allowed to have good games.


    Wtf does this have to do with xbla and did you even bother to look around? plenty of good games.
  • goz #22 5 years ago

    Hey Machetazo.

    I did try each of the other characters but settled on Carrie because she wears eyeliner and has a sweet sword obv. The default melee weapon for each character is different but there is no obvious difference between how each behaves - it just seems to be a graphical thing.

    As you say, it's certainly possible to have fun with the game and the flaws can be worked around with persistence.
    Edited by 1 at 25/06/07 @ 16:27
  • Whizzo #23 5 years ago

    Rule number 1) If the game's name features the words "Challenge" or "Madness" or even worse is alliterative, it's going to be terrible.

    The Midtown Madness series shows this should be more of a guideline than a rule.
  • souljacker2000 #24 5 years ago

    just could have been great just wanted 4 way zombie bashing thats all

    is that so much to ask
  • andromeda #25 5 years ago

    two page review for a so-so game? i don't get this. Surely just write " it not all that.." and be done with it. Save words for games that deserve them

    This does look kak thou, have to say.
    Edited by 1 at 25/06/07 @ 17:00
  • thefilthandthefury #26 5 years ago

    God damn, can't believe this! The trailers and the demo seemed absolutely stunning to me. Gutted :(
  • Darth_Flibble #27 5 years ago

    looks like another retarded Yellowtruck comment
  • Les #28 5 years ago

    "The trailers and the demo seemed absolutely stunning to me. Gutted :("

    It doesn't appear like the game is a radical departure from the demo, so if you liked that you'll probably like the full game as well. Just because EG gives it a low score shouldn't hold you back.
  • Nithron #29 5 years ago

    Zombies Ate My Neighbours was so damn awesome.
    I can still hear the theme tune, even now... it haunts my dreams
  • Xerx3s #30 5 years ago

    looks like another X360 classic.

    yt idiocy to the rescue.
  • thefilthandthefury #31 5 years ago

    You're right Les. Been playing this at a mates house tonight and thought it was excellent! Had a good laugh with this one, which is the point really isn't it?
  • muters #32 5 years ago

    It's pretty fun when it wants to be, but just when you're enjoying yourself you'll run into some absolutely ridiculous difficulty spike or glitch (monsters trapping you in a corner/falling through the scenery/inexplicable physics/dying at random/unfair instant death pits of doom/getting stunned by monsters repeatedly until you die/etc)

    It's 50% Good Times, 50% Sheer Bloody Hell. Though, speaking as someone who usually hates collect-em-ups, MM deserves a bit of praise for actually making all the junk collecting worthwhile.

    For what it's worth, I don't think the demo's a fair representation of the game. That level's absolutely tiny compared to the rest of them and you'll otherwise rarely have to use melee weapons (if you thought they're a bit crap -- I do) The default camera angle doesn't do it any favours, either.
  • Lim-Dul #33 5 years ago

    "Charlie's Angels" and "underrated". These aren't exactly two expressions I would expect to find in one sentence except for maybe "Charlie's Angels are underrated... NOT." ;-)

    Another example of strange wording: "Charlie's Angels [...] executed with flair and wit and self-depreciation"

    Charlie's Angels (the movies I mean) had as much flair as shit on a stick and as much wit as a retarded hamster.

    When it comes to self-depreciation - the movies tried SO hard to mock themselves that they ended up mocking the act of mocking themselves... Which is not a good thing...

  • afghan_jones #34 5 years ago

    how do people release shit like this in this day and age?

    This isnt 1990 anymore you know!
  • muters #35 5 years ago

    Has anyone ran into that glitch with the floating platforms and trampolines, just before the Lord of Demons boss fight? Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed the game, but that was shocking.

    I'm sure at some point they're going to have to drop the 'Battle for Suburbia' subtitle and release it as Monster Madness: For Fuck's Sake.
  • Grim... #36 4 years ago

    I know I'm a few months late, but, in the battles, FFVIII *is* playable co-op.

    Hahaha Hollywood knows more that you, etc.
    Edited by 1 at 24/10/07 @ 13:56