There's a new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles game in development.
There's a worrying trend starting to develop in games aimed at the younger end of the market these day. Back in the day, the idea of even saving your progress in a game was an alien concept but today, ever since Lego Star Wars did it, developers seem to think its okay to churn out games in which you can't actually die. The only thing this can ever test is patience, which is no good thing. And with its oh-so-frequent checkpoints in case you fall off a building (which will happen a lot through no fault of your own) and unique 'press A to get up with full life after being killed in battle' system, Turtles is the latest such offender. Oddly, though, this is pretty much the least of the game's worries.
Considering that UbiSoft Montreal is responsible for this movie tie-in, similarities to the Prince Of Persia games sort of make sense but while Turtles might follow the same recipe, it sure as hell doesn't use the right ingredients. Each of the sixteen levels is effectively an obstacle course with fights triggered at certain locations but seeing as how each of those two elements is deeply flawed, you can probably already see why Turtles isn't exactly 'must-play' material.
But before we lay bare the game's faults, it's probably best to set the scene. TMNT uses the style and locations from the new film but follows a rather different narrative, a cheap series of flashbacks narrated by the green chaps themselves as you play through. Cut scenes attempt to tie it together between each stage, but just end up making excuses as to why the game is single player only - a fact made even more ridiculous by the game's constant reminders of the importance of working together. Looks like somebody should have taken their own advice.
Those jovial artists are back in action, and Ubisoft is keen to give you a taste of painter-pie by releasing a demo for Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles on PC, which you can find elsewhere on the magical Internet.
Ubisoft's latest release schedule reveals that its Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles film adaptation is due out in March - with PlayStation 3, Xbox 360 and Nintendo Wii versions on the roster.
PS2 (also available on Xbox, Cube, PC)