The one-armed drummer out of Def Leppard has just offered to make me a cup of tea. He's making himself one anyway, but still. I've interviewed some top celebrities in my time - Keith Chegwin, Phil 'The Power' Taylor, the man who did the engine sounds for MotoGP 2006. All stars in their own right, but none of them belongs to an internationally famous rock band that has sold 65 million records over the course of its 30-year career. Unlike Rick Allen. And unlike Rick Allen, none of them has ever offered to make me a cup of tea.
When I was little, before girls and hair, me and my family used to march to a house full of old people and sing songs at them on Christmas Eve. Interesting creatures, full of stories and sticky toffee sweets, and if you played your cards right you might land your very first kiss. Funny smelling places though, like someone kept forgetting to flush the toilet, but then they are old so maybe it is forgiveable. Soap: another withered person smell. The moral is that old things are not useless and ready to be thrown away; my Grandma used to give me stacks of 20 pence pieces when I saw her. Back of the net.
The nights are so long these days (sorry, nights) that you could dress them up in angry forum posts and call them the delay between major Wii releases. Of the 12 Games of Christmas features we've done so far, this line-up saw by far the most chins stroked and calls placed in search of suitable candidates.
Another good thing about Christmas is that you can kiss people by holding a twig with leaves above their heads, made all the more likely by the enormous vat of incredibly pungent mulled wine stewing in the kitchen. Similarly smile-worthy is that yes there are games on PS3 to buy this year, despite what James with his rival console says in the comments section while picking his nose and flicking it at his equally spotty friend.
It is now dark when we walk home and birds are either dropping out of trees in frozen lumps or going somewhere much nicer for their holidays. And, as always happens, the shops are hoisting their Christmas decorations up and getting us all worried about buying presents because we never know what they want is it socks or aftershave. So, we thought we would join in.
Words cannot describe the joy that beset me upon discovering that Guitar Hero 3 has a Die Toten Hosen track in it. No, seriously. I have long harboured an ardent and obscure love for German-language music, a passion that has seen me go to great lengths in the past to obtain Singstar Deutsch Rock-Pop, and which often furrows the brows of nosy friends as they browse through the contents of my iPod. It also made me very nearly lose control when Die Toten Hosen themselves actually appeared on stage at Sony's press conference back in Leipzig, and I think I may have rather alarmed Tom. Anyway, whilst everyone else was either grumbling or shrugging at the news that Guitar Hero 3 will have a slightly international track list in Europe, I was jumping up and down with glee. Hier Kommt Alex AND In Flames' Take This Life? It's like they're making this game just for me.
It's been an interesting few weeks for RedOctane. Guitar Hero II has finally launched on Xbox 360, but the publisher - now part of Activision - has finally caught sight of what the game's developer, Harmonix, has gone off to make with Electronic Arts and MTV. Rock Band might well be described as a spiritual successor to Guitar Hero, and the decision to introduce other instruments, and vocals, arguably raises doubts about the real Guitar Hero III, in development at Neversoft, and due out on PS3, Xbox 360, Wii and PS2 later this year.