The Expendables 2

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The Expendables 2 Review

The Expendables 2 Review

Muscle memory.

At some point in the last few years, the movie tie-in quietly died. Once the keystone of the AAA games market, today you'd be hard pressed to find a game on the shelves to coincide with most blockbusters. Few will mourn the passing of this particular gaming genus, as the movie tie-in was always a notoriously wretched breed.

As if to illustrate the point here's The Expendables 2, a shoddy twin-stick co-op shooter based on Stallone's latest Age Concern infomercial that would struggle to stand alongside the crude side-scrollers that bore Sly's face thirty years ago, let alone the current crop of military muscle games. It's perhaps appropriate that a film that shamelessly looks back to the gory glory days of action movies should be one of the few to inspire a game tie-in, but that doesn't mean the end result is any more satisfying.

This is one of those games where so much is wrong that it's hard to know where to start, a feat made all the more startling by the fact that absolutely nothing being attempted here is even remotely ambitious. You move, you shoot. The template is decades old, tried and tested. It should be bread and butter. There's literally no excuse for getting it this wrong.

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The Expendables 2 game tie-in announced

The Expendables 2 game tie-in announced

Ubisoft brings tinnitus-inducing action flick to PC, PSN, XBLA.

A video game version of daft, deafening action movie sequel The Expendables 2 is on its way to PC, PlayStation Network and Xbox Live Arcade, publisher Ubisoft has announced.

It's a four player co-op affair, in which you can choose from Barney Ross (STALLONE!), Gunner Jensen (LUNDGREN!), Yin Tang (LI!) or Hale Caesar (CREWS!?).

As for the plot - some gumph about rescuing a kidnapped billionaire, no doubt from a mean old South American drug lord.

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