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Duke Nukem Forever

What are you waiting for, Christmas?

The next level on show is set not in the kind of metropolitan environment the Duke Nukem games are known for, but in familiar Borderlands-style desert terrain. You start out driving a red truck through a canyon. The controls are responsive but I run out of gas early on, before encountering a single enemy. The vehicle's appearance feels all too brief.

But now we're in more traditional Duke Nukem territory. Hog-headed aliens resembling Ninja Turtle's nemesis Bebop have popped out from behind rocks and are firing away. This is no cover-based shooter, however. Back in Duke's day there was no such thing as cover. Men fought in open battlefields, fighting it out until one side fell. Like real men.

And as for auto-aim? Forget about it. You kids today have it too easy. The DNF demo suggests this game will be surprisingly difficult for the likes of you, offering few concessions to modern gaming conventions.

Duke's health system has evolved, though. On finding myself down to my last sliver of health, I seek out a spot to recoup and watch it recharge to the mid-point. It's a happy medium between the mollycoddling rechargeable health of today and the more archaic health packs of yesteryear.

Godot ain't got nothin' on Duke.

There isn't a huge selection of weapons to choose from in the demo. The starting pistol is pretty standard. The disintegrating scoped rail gun adds a bit more flavour. But what really catches my eye is the shrink ray. Watching the opposition transform from a threatening hulk of meat into a housepet is hilarious in its own right and in keeping with Duke's philosophy that size does matter.

Putting the strippers and silly quips to one side, Duke Nukem 3D was known for its tight level design and host of secrets. These traits aren't apparent in the demo of Duke Nukem Forever. It's extraordinarily scripted with little room for deviation. However, it's a brief demo, and only time will tell what Gearbox has in store.

The demo certainly sets the tone. Everything in the game is big and stupid, but knowingly so. Duke's quips are by no means clever, but they're so dumb they're funny. It's as if Beavis and Butthead developed the skills and drive to make a videogame, yet maintained the same simple-minded sensibilities.

It's ridiculously crass and not for everyone, but DNF still has a goofy sense of camp that separates it from other, similarly violent guilty pleasures, where the pathos is incongruous to the action. Duke may not be deep, but he is consistent.

The story of Duke Nukem Forever isn't really about aliens so much as it's about itself and how it came to be released. That's the story everyone wants to hear and Gearbox knows it. DNF had the longest line of any game at PAX (about three hours' queuing time according to Gearbox staff), and we all know why.

There's an air of mystery surrounding what has become the industry's longest running joke. But once the curtain lifts and the novelty has worn off, DNF will need to step up if it's to stand the test of time - lest it become the next Daikatana.

By wisely throwing in so many nods to Duke's legacy, this game hopes to swap common criticism like "dated" and "linear" for positives like "retro" and "streamlined". My time spent with Duke Nukem Forever was enjoyable, even if it did little to innovate. This game isn't trying to rewrite the first-person shooter rulebook. Instead, it's hearkening back to a simpler time, when story was just an excuse for guns, girls and gags.

Duke Nukem Forever is slated for a 2011 release on PC, PS3 and Xbox 360.