We can't be friends, we can't be enemies.
I love a party with a happy atmosphere +4.
As far off the beaten one as you can imagine.
The panto Ninja Gaiden.
Aftermath you can count better.
When life gives you cannons, make Cannonade.
Warthogs and all.
There's nothing to fear.
Must... have... child... before... 35.
The right to choose. Guns.
It's finally PC. But not very PC, natch.
It's braining men.
More bewitching than ever.
Ironically, not evolutionary: revolutionary.
Pause for effect.
Trials trial version also available!
The Scrin-er takes it all.
Why not be a dirty sinner?
Mad Hex: Return to Thunderroll.
Fantasy Adventure: Noun of the Noun.
Coming to America. And Lithuania.
Gangs of New Orcs.
The Dark Future of Cross-format shooting?
In other news, War Paper and War Scissors announced.
A 3D Ant Attack for the noughties.
Six and the City.
It's Christmas time. But should you get hammered?
Winter: it'll all be over by Christmas [spring, surely - Ed].
Just might or all magic?
Do you want to play a game?
In the Company of Ico, Deus Ex...
The Call of the Wild West.
Want to play? Join the build queue.
Like Singstar, but space-sim tradier.
Gordian knot? Gordian, yes.
Put your feet up and play.
Lights! Camera! Faction!
The war on the War on Terror.
High spirits on the high sea, but feeling rum.
Come on down! And the mark too!
Less Art of War, more Art of More.
I want to make a part of it!
Our five-minute mission to explore strange new worlds.
Special? How special?
Christmas is coming and the accountants are getting fat.
The Really Wild, shown
"I like to Movies, movies" - The Mad Stuntman, mishearing.
Leave Bristol alone.
Be Civil. Itís the right thing to do.
Move over, Valve. Eurogamer, taking ovvvvahhh.
Insane in the membrane.
More godlike than God of War?
Old Firm battles with Space Celtic ensue.
Less fashionable than Rome: Total War Barbie Invasion.
Colosseum: Road to Boredom, more like.
DUNGeon siege, more like. Er... except not.
EA's yearly update improves tank handling from the 2159 edition.
Madagascar? BADagascar, more like. Except not that bad, actually.
Don't bring a gun to a tankfight. Except an anti-tank gun. That's okay.
Water, water everywhere. Sell tickets.
"Illegal alien, signed up." "Anyone ever mistook you for a man" "Etc."
A three-point turn.
Gilded gold stars all round.
The Empire Earth strikes back.
Much like the Neapolitan wars, but with less strawberry.
In the immortal words of the Eurovision song contest, Neo points.
To get to the head of the tactical shooter class, you have to swat.
Off topic, but will someone please remake Skool Daze? Cheers.
From High Def Gaming to Die Hef Gaming? For those of you who read the articles...
Not the "Lights! Camera! Action!" kind of Direct Action.
Games evolving into its own little niche.
"Heritage of Kings". As in "inbred and a little stunted".
Got the whole world in his hands +4.
Why did the Egyptian Swimmer go to the psychologist? Coz he was living in... oh, forget it.
Fear the Deadly Shiny Pebble. Fear it.
The Old Knights of the Old Republic made new. Ish.
Much like The Hitman and Her for the pre-Romans.
"Mommy! What's that monkey doing?" "Move along, dear."
Kieron Gillen's Review!
Stop the press. Review in just in time to meet its Undeadline.
More ill-advised spandex than a The Darkness tribute band convention.
Supa-dupa looper-troopa. Iíll stop.
Save the world. Also, philander.
War. It's fantastic.
Do as the Romans do.
Considerable improvements over last year's Warhammer 39,999.
Kieron Gillen's only a master of evil...