Carlos Tevez. Even at a cosy, vodka cocktail-fuelled gathering to informally discuss the exciting new features of Football Manager 2008, the subject of the Argentine's ownership still manages to dominate a third of conversations. To make matters worse, I find myself boxed into a corner by two massive Spurs fans, a Luton fan, two intoxicated Arsenal fans and - worry, worry - a Millwall fan, making my claret-and-blue-tinted opinions on the whole debacle somewhat unheard. It's just like reading the Daily Mail, only with an impending threat of violence.
Last week's routine trawl of the DVD trade-in dug up a £2.50 copy of Rob Zombie's horror film debut House Of 1000 Corpses. Like its demented follow-up The Devil's Rejects, it was a crass lesson in subversive terror, spooning out the splatter in big, thick globs. Limb amputation, bloody scalping and wide-awake brain surgery, all orchestrated on whiter-than-white victims by deranged, dribbling killers, whose mockery of classic genre convention saw them not only kick shit in such hideous fashion, but get away with the whole damn thing too. Another day in the age of the sado-horror flick.