Up. Down. Up. Down. Dedicated Virtual Consolers should be used to the peculiar biorhythms that seem to guide Nintendo's rapidly expanding retro pipeline, and this is more of a down week than an up. There's amusement to be found in the latest additions, but nothing that grabs you by the lapels and compels you to download.
Speaking of which, do people still wear clothes with lapels on an everyday basis? Or have they joined spats and trilbies in the charity shop of history? Maybe you're sporting some fine lapels at this very moment. Why not write in to email@example.com and let us know?
- Platform: NES
- Wii Points: 500
- In Real Money: GBP 3.75 / EUR 5.00
Like all good bourgeois class traitors, I've currently got the builders in to transform my humble suburban semi-detached into a slightly larger suburban semi-detached with a downstairs toilet so I can go for a poo without having to lose sight of my precious, precious HD gaming telly.
Being surrounded by burly craftsmen, who can actually create and fix things of tangible value to mankind, I'm stricken with feelins of inadequacy as I sit there, joypad in hand, fannying about with games. "Seriously", I want to cry, "It's real work, honest." Wrecking Crew, an NES curio from 1985, may not have much to recommend it in 2007 but it does at least give me some measure of common ground with the musky tea-guzzling tradesmen slaving away to improve my home equity, as it involves Mario hitting things with a hammer.
Why, I think I can feel my proud working class roots stirring already...
One of those official-but-tangential Mario outings that saw the hairy plumber removed from his traditional environment, Wrecking Crew is actually a throwback of sorts to his origins as Jumpman in Donkey Kong. Once again, our hero scrambles up ladders and across girders but there's no giant ape this time, and no tumbling barrels. Instead you must demolish all the destructible items in the level without being grabbed by wandering monsters. As these destructible items also include ladders, there's a strong element of puzzling involved as you work out the correct sequence to smash things up.
The longevity is also marginally improved with a rudimentary level designer, which allows you to create and save four of your own creations for solo or two-player fun, a feature previously exclusive to the Japan-only NES Data Recorder. It's a decent time-waster, in a sort of sub-Dig Dug kind of way, though it mostly reminded me of the early Jon Ritman hit, Bear Bovver. I can think of more worthwhile ways to spend 500 points of pretend Nintendo money, but it ain't bad.