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Games make you have sex

Except it's fat sex.

A recent news report by the Agence France-Presse news agency reveals that games are likely to make you more promiscuous. However, they're also likely to make you fat, apparently.

"Computer games have been suspected of contributing to societal ills ranging from obesity and a breakdown of family communication to promiscuity and an inclination to violence, according to researchers,” says the report.

It goes on to quote a number of American researchers who come to the unsurprising conclusion that spending all day loafing on the sofa, eating snacks and playing games instead of doing any exercise, makes people fat.

And while Nintendo's Wii and games like EyeToy and Dance Dance: Revolution might make kids jump around, the study also highlights the potential of in-game advertising to promote junk food to the world's seemingly ever-expanding population of fatties.

There may be a joke about the use of Feeder's music in videogame soundtracks, but if there is, it'll take too long to explain, because it basically assumes you know that the band takes its name from a fetish for having sex with fat people.