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Next time you have a kebab - make sure you check the wrapper. Today's offering from the kebab shop downstairs (small doner, extra chilli sauce and lashings of pickled chillies) came wrapped in paper advertising a certain games console. It read: "Dead or Alive 3. It can be hard to adjust to reality. Xbox. Play more. Play Dead or Alive 3." It also said: "Dispose of after use." We assume that means the paper wrapper - not the game or console.

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