Hello, hi, sorry it's me again.
It might not be the biggest conference when it comes to headlines, but on past form it's certainly one of the most fun. Ubisoft takes to the E3 stage at 9pm BST to offer fresh looks at Assassin's Creed Odyssey, The Division 2 and Beyond Good and Evil 2, plus hopefully more than a little gallic eccentricity on the side. Join us to see it all unravel.
Just over 30 minutes to go, and I'm heading down to Easy Hours on a beer run. Who wants what? Kami, you're on the jasmine tea, right?
Hello from the Orpheum Theatre, where I'm probably watching the same pre-conference spiel as you are. As always, the chandeliers in here are lovely.
Anything else interesting to share?
The pre-conference food is stroopwaffles. They were good.
Oh I do love the Orpheum Theatre.
A new version of Rocksmith would be a welcome surprise! Other than that I'm hoping to see some gameplay in BG&E2.
I've heard BGE2 still isn't playable at E3 this week, but we should definitely see more than last year's tech demo. Honestly though, Michel Ancel can take as long as he wants to nail it.
It's an incredibly classy backdrop, and it's just a delight to sit in the beautiful beaux arts theatre.
And no, Aaron Priceman - also known as Mr. Caffeine - will not be there this year.
More's the pity.
Aisha > Mr. Caffeine.
Three minutes! I will put my money down and say we will see an Assassin's Creed game.
So, what to expect.
Well, there's the known knowns.
As Tom says, expect an Assassin's Creed.
I think there will also be a lot of disappointed people if Ubisoft's annual "one last thing" is not Splinter Cell.
The Division 2, Beyond Good & Evil 2, Skull & Bones.
What I'd love? Fade to black at the end, see three green lights come up on screen and that traditional fizzing power sound.
And a tease - and hopefully a little more - of a new Splinter Cell.
That'd be very nice thank you very much.
The really big news, though.
Is that Aisha is back.
Last thing from me - do refresh Eurogamer.com as soon as the conference finishes to hear a lot more about Assassin's Creed Odyssey. If you have a burning question from seeing it in the conference, we hope you will find answers.
"The really big news, though." - Is that you're not drunk, Martin?
Right, let's do this.
Who are these jabronis?
We want Aisha.
Oh I forgot they've got a cars. The Crew 2 will obviously feature a little, even if it's out fairly soon.
First though, a panda dancing.
How can you not love Ubisoft?
Would be up for 90 minutes of this to be honest.
I've never really played Just Dance.
But I hope that every year it opens Ubisoft's conference.
Because it's just the greatest.
This dance number is better than all of Square Enix's miserable half hour.
Please be Aisha in the Panda costume!
That'd win E3, really. Sorry Microsoft.
I really hope this never stops.
It's showing no signs of stopping as the extended musical number goes on and on and on, and the panda just keeps on dancing.
So there you go, there's a Just Dance game coming out in October.
And what is this?
It's Beyond Good & Evil, because why not start with the big guns.
I still don't quite understand how these extravagant cinematics square with what sounds like quite an MMO-ish game.
And there's your money shot. Jade.
I didn't even care much for the original, but that gave me goosebumps.
Will we get to see some more of the game in action though?
If you're at E3 - and are lucky enough to have an appointment - there's an extended demo.
We are getting our own look at Ganesha, though, one of the locales in the game.
And it's mighty, mighty pretty.
And annoyingly we're not seeing it properly on the feed.
That was an utter waste. Why show us a zoomed out shot of the stage? Silly sausages.
And here's Joseph Gordon-Levitt for a little touch of the bizarre - his company Hit-Record is involved in Beyond Good & Evil 2.
It's that guy off Don John!
It's that guy that was going to be Batman before sad Affleck came along and ruined it all!
Anyway, this is about community collaboration. Do people who contribute art, assets and so forth get paid?
The mic is left on as they leave stage.
And you hear a high-pitched 'WE NAILED IT'!
Yeah you kind of did. Nice one!
Here's Rainbow Six: Siege with an impressive number to kick its section off - there are now 35 million players of Ubi's tactical shooter.
BGE2 is confusing. If it's a prequel - how does Pey'j know who Jade is?
(also a quick follow-up - apparently HitRecord does pay contributors, so good one all around well done everybody!)
That was... A trailer for a Rainbow Six documentary?
Who cares her's RedLynx's nutty Antti with what must be a new Trials.
He is a beautifully strange man.
And quite a good slapstick comedian.
I've met him a few times, and this isn't an act. He really is this nuts.
We're due a decent Trials game, I think, as the last couple have fallen a little flat.
It looks like Trials without some of the gimmicks that have blighted recent games.
So I'm in.
Trials Rising be it.
Professor Fatshady, a Trials streamer, is up here now.
Closed beta coming later this year is the upshot of all that.
And yes it's coming to Switch.
Is it the 22nd by any chance? Is it like the video game releace date version of chicken?
It must be, because every game is attracted to that date like it's some kind of deep void of a black hole.
Julian Gerrighty, who you might remember from the original The Crew and other games, looks like he's walked straight out of Watch Dogs as he presents The Division 2.
That untucked dress shirt under a jacket is not going down well in the Eurogamer office, let me tell you.
Potentially unpopular opinion but I enjoyed the story/setting of The Division. The wintry city helped. Not sure I want to swelter through DC.
I'm with you, I thought it worked well.
Under a denim jacket. WITH SWEAT PANTS.
â€˜We, as agents of the deep state, must protect our plants and children from the even deeper stateâ€™
Anyway The Division 2 will have colours.
I love Ubisoft games, but I do think it's time to leave the Tom Clancy bullshit behind.
It seems dated, nasty and kind of in contrast to the values they otherwise extol.
I dunno though, it does mean cool gadgets and lots of shooty bang bang so maybe I should shut up.
The Division 2's going to have a much bigger focus on the endgame, which is a good thing seeing how hard I bounced off of it after seeing through the (generous) main questline.
And The Division 2 will have raids.
(I thought the incursions were already kind of like raids?)
DLC episodes will be free.
This has been a terrible E3 fir nipplewatch so far. Sigh.
I think they're on to us, hence the new trend for jirts.
The jirt allows you to be free and unencumbered while still covering your nipples.
And on from that dirgey shooter to something a bit lighter - Rabbids.
It's about the Donkey Kong DLC coming to Mario and Rabbids. Rather than anything new we're getting a Grant Kirkhope performance.
And you know what, I'm fine with that.
Sometimes the mic stays on and gets stuff which paints you in a positive light. Sometimes, a little less so.
Again, I'm very much behind this. How lovely to have a Kirkhope performance live on stage.
This is, above all, a lovely celebration of games, and another nice little tip of the hat from Ubisoft to Nintendo.
What did he say anyways? I missed the words
‘They changed the intro again?’
‘Yeah, they change it every two seconds’
Something along those lines - some minor squabbling.
And they've slowed it riiiiiggggghhhht down.
Skull & Bones now please.
oh god how've we gone from Donkey Kong joyousness to a turgid grey pirate cannon-a-thon?
There is nothing turgid about pirates!
This is looking like the game Sea of Thieves was meant to be. He says have only seen about 8 minutes of pre-rendered footage.
Probably enough for me to base a review on to be fair.
Why's Justin Farren wearing a scarf indoors?
Is the aircon on super strong in The Orpheum? Is he Doctor Who?
Or does he just have a hickey that he's trying to hide.
In case he's mum sees it and asks what he was up to last night.
Is this already confirmed as online Multiplayer only?
It was last year, I believe.
This does look an awful lot like Sea of Thieves. With more graphics and somehow less of them too.
(Don't expect me to be writing for Digital Foundry anytime soon).
The problem with multiplayer only games, such as Sea of Thieves, and presumably Skull & Bones, is the propensity of gankers and grievers.
But pirates are the original griefers!
That was Skull and Bones. It's got pirates in it.
And this is Elijah Woods game that I forgot all about. It's Transference.
Gary Busey's coming on stage to introduce his own take on the Battle Royale genre a bit later.
It's a VR game, I believe, but it's also getting a flatscreen release.
I'm sure this was announced as a VR exclusive, and that seems to have been watered down with it coming to traditional platforms.
It does look fascinating, mind.
This is a fairly interesting new take on the toys to life phenomenon - or maybe not such a phenomenon anymore - called Starlink.
I didn't see it last year, but people I know who did tell me it's very interesting indeed.
Coming October 16th.
It's weird, they seem to be targetting an older audience but only few in that group will by toys
I think it's for a slightly older market than Skylanders, a slightly younger one than Amiibo (because they're all bought by tragic thirtysomethings like me, right?)
It's Star Fox.
And that music has me close to tears.
Star Fox is coming to Starlink. I'm not sure how integral it'll be.
It's a Switch exclusive - Star Fox, that is. But I guess that was obvious.
And here's Miyamoto, and every time I see him I can't help but smile.
Enormous cheers and applause for Yves and Miyamoto. Crowd here loved that.
And here's what Star Fox the toy looks like in Star Link.
I will be buying that.
Well that was a nice surprise.
For Honor, which judging by our recent re-review has come a fair way since launch, steps up now.
We've still got Assassin's Creed to step up as well, and just over 20 minutes left to run through by my estimations.
Marching Fire is an all-new For Honor expansion.
It's out October 16th.
Nintendo just need a proper Fire Emblem game and they win E3.
We're due one, aren't we? Hoping it shows up tomorrow.
There's a new 4x4 multiplayer mode coming to For Honor, in a new mode called Bridge.
I can't hear for all the explosions. You're right, it is.
The Crew 2 up now, then - so we might only have room for Assassin's and one... more... thing.
Pre-load for The Crew 2 is up right now, if that's your thing.
I liked the crew
I think collectively at Eurogamer we also enjoyed it more than most, as we've all got a bit of a soft spot for eccentric racers. This also looks pleasingly offbeat.
It's time for your Assassin's update - a sequel to last year's Origins, and a continuation of that story.
We'll have quite a bit more detail on this hitting the site shortly.
This chap's gone even further to protect any nipple reveal under the shirt - he's wearing some kind of protective undergarment so even if they stiffen up and poke out like bullets we're unlikely to see them.
Ah so I might have bene wrong and it's not a strict continuation, seeing as you choose your own character in this Assassin's Creed.
Given the focus on nippleage - what drinking game are you playing, Martin?
I'm drinking a beer every time I get thirsty.
It's my favourite drinking game.
Taking that as the title of my memoirs, thanks.
It can't be a continuation. It's set about four centuries prior.
I got it wrong, sorry - I'm not too hot on Assassin's stuff (Tom is the super nerd on all things AC, and thankfully he's handling the write-up that's about to hit the site).
Well Odyssey certainly has its fair share of graphics.
I swear Assassinâ€™s Creed loves the â€˜walk and talkâ€™ more than Aaron Sorkin.
There's a much bigger RPG feel to this, especially in the branching conversations.
Also it's just really, really pretty.
Was that a romance option?
I believe so. More BioWare than Anthem, it would seem.
So the PC Gaming show up next - is it worth watching? Does anything interesting get announced, or should I go watch Black Panther before it's time for Sony?
We won't be live reporting the PC gaming show this year, but it's always got a few good moments in there. And it is something to do while we wait for Sony, so...
That's Odyssey then. Looks alright, don't it?
We're past 90 minutes now.
That dancing panda seems like a lifetime ago.
But there's surely time for one last thing.
That really is it.
No big climax, although Assassin's does look lovely.
So that was Ubisoft's conference.
Typically upbeat, full of lovely moments - Antti being a highlight, as ever - and some decent looking games.
No real showstoppers like The Division, Watch Dogs or Rabbids back in the day - but maybe there's something of a holding pattern while Ubi preps for the next gen that's clearly imminent.
In the meantime we've got lots of awesome things to keep us occupied.
We'll be back at 2am for Sony. Hopefully see you there!
Sony can get with the times and realise GMT exists then I might bother to watch.
Catch you all later, and thanks, as ever, for joining.