The Impossible Game Level Pack

  • Xbox Live Indie Games - 80 Microsoft Points (£0.64)

If one concentrated dose of gaming dementia wasn't enough to finish off your poor, frazzled nervous system, then it's only logical to come back for a double portion next time, right?

Having driven most of us completely loopy earlier in the year with the most irritatingly addictive platform game in history, Flukedude thought it was perfectly fair to finish off everyone else with this equally rabid 'level pack'.

No, it doesn't do anything especially different from last time, and yes, joypads almost certainly will be hurled across living rooms around the world as you attempt to guide a runaway box over a series of dastardly triangles.

Why do we do it to ourselves?

You'll even be able to see how many jumps you've made, and how many times you've died, and how many puppies and kittens were ritually slaughtered during the many rage-induced minutes of your time with the game.

Seriously, someone call The Daily Mail and Panorama and ban this sick filth, before we all get locked up.


Unbound Saga

  • Xbox Live Arcade - 800 Microsoft Points (£6.80)
  • Previously released on PSP in summer 2009

If at first you don't succeed, waste everyone's time all over again – that's Vogster's motto as it brings its critically derided side-scrolling brawler to Xbox Live Arcade for no logical reason whatsoever.

Combining Streets Of Rage with Comix Zone probably sounded like a fine idea back in the nineties, but when met with the withering stare of 2010, this painfully repetitive slugger reminds us how dull games can be.

Bam! Thwock! Wacka wacka!

Trapped in a comic-book world, you guide either lumbering meathead Rick or lithe, quipping saucetress Lori Machete along a procession of incoherent frames, smashing anything that gets in your way. The hand of the 'maker' continually draws new enemies, presumably for his own amusement, but he seems to have an inability to create characters that you care about or carve out a storyline that entertains in any way.

That might not matter in the least if the sludgy combat system was even remotely enjoyable, but it's the worst kind of gaming stodge parachuted in from an era when we didn't know any better. No-one cared when this was released on PSP in summer 2009, and they certainly won't give a flying fig about it now.


About the author

Kristan Reed

Kristan Reed


Kristan is a former editor of Eurogamer, dad, Stone Roses bore and Norwich City supporter who sometimes mutters optimistically about Team Silent getting back together.

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