penhalion Comments

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  • Outlast 2 review

  • penhalion 27/04/2017

    Damn! read the review and thought wow did not expect such a silly route for this game to take extreme misogynistic males mixed with the current trend of women raging against the machine and then ending up as caricatures of the very males they hate. Pretty much nothing to love about the plot or direction this game has taken.

    Oh well.
    Reply 0
  • Halo 5's lack of Master Chief was a "huge disappointment", 343 admits

  • penhalion 27/04/2017

    Yes give us back Master Chief and fix Cortana while you're at it. The current story arc is just plain getting silly! Reply 0
  • Scanner Sombre review

  • penhalion 26/04/2017

    Saw this and played it a year or so ago at the indie showcase. Very disappointed to see it's exactly the same as it was then, with exactly the same disappointment I flagged up to the devs when they asked my thoughts. I said at the time that it just seemed like something that would quickly grow boring as you realised you were simply revealing echos of a scene seemingly long passed.

    I genuinely got the sense that the devs weren't sure what to do with the game either which seems to be reflected in the tone of this review.
    Reply 0
  • Alien: Isolation 2 rumour isn't true

  • penhalion 26/04/2017

    Alien Isolation started out really well until you worked out that a lot of the Alien's appearances were not random hunting at all. Also, towards the end, you really started to wonder why you were not allowed to simply make use of the many (and I mean many) weapons lying about. The damned thing simply wouldn't have been that big of a threat if you were allowed to used a little human ingenuity.

    I guess, like the "Don't go into the basement" common sense solution to a horror movie, if you are allowed to act with any intelligence at all. the happy game ending screen would pop up 5 minutes after starting most games!

    My all time favorite "But, I just said nope" leading to a five minute game is still Ocarina of Time. Zelda says "Will you help me" you say nope and Gannon is never a good-un!
    Reply 0
  • Julian Gollop launches $500,000 crowdfunder for X-COM spiritual successor

  • penhalion 26/04/2017

    However, the most exciting feature being discussed is the alien's evolution system. If an alien unit is being consistently beaten in combat, it'll trigger a random mutation, perhaps improving the unit's melee capabilities or improving its defence against certain weaponry. If that mutation proves successful against the player, the alien forces will start deploying more of that unit type as a result. This idea sounds ambitious, but has the potential to act as a self-regulating difficulty slider if it works. Sounds brilliant.
    Like so many systems of this kind. It actually ends up simply making the player feel like they make no progress. It's basically akin to the old Elder Scrolls system where everything simply increased it's level based on what level your character currently was. Players ended up frustrated and eventually learnt that levelling didn't matter so there was no point grinding for it. Needless to say later Elder Scrolls games removed this system.

    Extreme care will need to be taken to ensure that the enemy mutation system doesn't end up simply being thought of as the game cheating i.e. if you research great weapons the game simply cheats and mutates the enemies to be immune to them thus putting the player back at square one and negating their efforts. This is frustrating and ultimately will make people simply walk away swearing.
    Reply 0
  • Sniper Ghost Warrior 3 review

  • penhalion 25/04/2017

    It takes 5 minutes to load. At that point I didn't bother even considering it any further. Reply 0
  • Swery's new game will be "perverted, violent and crazy"

  • penhalion 25/04/2017

    "The original script for Deadly Premonition centred around a killer who raped and then ate his victims," his translator relayed. "Obviously that's something only an insane person would write, which is why he had to change it."
    So Silence of the Lambs should never have happened then?!?

    Reply 0
  • Snooker star says he's a recovering video game addict

  • penhalion 25/04/2017

    "I've had really good application in my practice after dragging myself away from playing too many video games," Robertson said.
    Closely followed by "Is that a switch...yea er maybe just a little taste...rub around my gums....*sniff* hey I guess one controller isn't going to do any harm....multiplayer mario kart....*sniff* well maybe just one lap...I mean I'm not due to play for another few minutes....*sniff*"

    Six weeks later Neil woke up in an alley wearing tramps clothes and clutching a switch wrapped in a brown paper bag....
    Reply 0
  • Frontier promises to fix Elite Dangerous' bug-ridden update with early May patch

  • penhalion 25/04/2017

    Infinite packhounds.....yea I'd move that bug to low priority....;) Reply 0
  • A three-year-old Elite Dangerous mystery is finally unravelling

  • penhalion 25/04/2017

    Damn my little starter ship may just need better insurance if i'm defending this Salomé Reply 0
  • A call to arms for the UK fighting game community

  • penhalion 24/04/2017


    it always felt like the latter were tolerated by the former because they made up the numbers.
    This is why I hated such communities in the past. I never accept that it's ok to have people throwing insults and racist/sexist crap comments just because they THINK they are anonymous behind the interwebs.

    In any tournament environment or managed social network there should be a zero tolerance mentality. Fine if you are in a party of your friends only, playing in a private match and you all happen to be racist, homophobic, sexist twats. That's your call but, never ever tolerated in any kind of public setting.

    The problem is that solid messages are never sent to these people. A lifetime ban from the tournament or network should be the norm. I'd bet good money that we'd soon see a lot of people cleaning up their acts and playing nice with one another if they knew that being a prat got you excluded.
    Reply 0
  • Zelda: Breath of the Wild's Fire Keese has an interesting reaction to rain

  • penhalion 24/04/2017

    You can almost hear GTA6 being re-written after reading all the amazing detail that Nintendo has put into an open world using what many will call last century hardware! ;) Reply 0
  • There's another ZX Spectrum crowdfunder - but this one looks promising

  • penhalion 24/04/2017

    Why? I know I'm going to get negged but, seriously! Why?

    I'm as nostalgic as the next bloke but, why would I buy a spectrum in this day and age. There isn't a PC around that doesn't have the horse power to simply emulate one of these machines as well as run all of those "I would have sworn this was a better game when I played it back in the day?!?" tape images that you all long to re-experience.

    After a half hour of re-living the past surely anyone who buys this is going to be wondering why they didn't just go buy something less boring instead!
    Reply 0
  • Little Nightmares review

  • penhalion 23/04/2017

    May grab this Reply 0
  • Watch someone defeat Dark Souls 3's Ringed City big boss on NG+7 with a broken sword

  • penhalion 20/04/2017

    they would applaud it and drop a prism stone, the game's most worthless item that's only used to drop off high points to determine how deep a pit goes.
    Er what? These stones are what save your hide when you are trying to determine if there is a secret drop below a ledge, verify if a message is bogus, guide you through the dark maze etc. etc.

    Pretty much the staple of every Dark Souls vet out there!

    As for these videos. They've become a war of attrition quite frankly. Once you learn the attack patterns it may look impressive but, it's pretty hard to loose to the bosses as this video clearly shows. The broken sword thing just means that it takes a stupid amount of time and attack pattern repeats to defeat the boss.
    Reply 0
  • Scorpio is console hardware pushed to a new level

  • penhalion 19/04/2017

    The Scorpio is exactly what should happen. It's basically a gaming PC with a standard and known feature set. Just like a PC, the games can be made to work on the low end model (the XBox One) but, scale to the high end model (the Scorpio). The scaling will bring speed, texture fidelity, extra physics and effects but, crucially be the same game otherwise.

    Later when the sales reach an acceptable level we can start to see games made exclusively to take advantage of the high end box with maybe a much scaled back version for the low end box.

    This is how PC works now. It's what we expect to have happen i.e. if I have a skank PC I don't expect to run Crysis at Ultra on it but, I do expect to be able to do that on a mega gaming rig. What I don't expect (and this is my point) is to buy Crysis again just for the high end gaming rig!
    Reply 0
  • Nintendo Switch to host an arcade full of Namco classics

  • penhalion 18/04/2017

    @gizmo2501 Actually, if you own the originals and have no medium to run them on you are actually allowed to make a copy for your own personal use. Also the copyright will have run out on many old titles even though you wouldn't know it from the bogus cease and desist letters some companies will happily send out (valid in some countries but, not where the title hasn't been re-released before the deadline passed). Reply 0
  • We watched a Scorpio console get put together

  • penhalion 17/04/2017

    @-Gemini44- Exactly! The moment someone is asking for your hard earned cash you have a right to compare and question!

    Only the incredibly stupid or dare I say it brainwashed will blindly throw money at some company and then defend that company like a rabid dog rather than face the fact that they may have in fact backed the wrong horse.
    Reply 0
  • Fez is coming to iOS this year

  • penhalion 15/04/2017

    Still can't bring myself to play the fez creator's games anymore. Lived through his strops with players and his basic disregard for the people he was expecting to give him money. Most notably the idiotic and deliberate final puzzle that had no actual solution anywhere in the game and had to be brute forced by the playerbase. Not because that was his plan but, solely because he had added a f^&k you into the game for it's players! Reply 0
  • Why Bayonetta is still the brawler to beat

  • penhalion 15/04/2017

    @smelly If you thought it was just a button masher then you really didn't get it at all. The combat has so many different aspects to it and you learn them as you go along. Ariel enemies behave and need to be dealt with different from ground enemies, who are in turn different from the mini boss style enemies and the epic multi-part boss fights.

    You've really missed a cracker here but, if you felt you were just button mashing, then that's cool. No-one likes every game.
    Reply 0
  • There was a weird thing in last night's Japanese Nintendo Direct

  • penhalion 13/04/2017

    The reason this was cut from the European Nintendo Direct can be plainly seen by the comments here. In Japan it's a cultural thing so they don't take it seriously yet in these comments the "politically correct yet totally uninformed" feel only too obliged to rush in and condemn.

    Quite laughable really.
    Reply 0
  • Elite Dangerous patch notes accidentally references horrific United Airlines incident

  • penhalion 12/04/2017

    Surely this has to go down as one of the best video game patch notes of all time
    Why would a patch note that, on any other day, would usually not even garner a glance suddenly be the best patch note of all time. You Sir are a class A sensationalist twat.
    Reply +1
  • Elite Dangerous gets long-awaited Multi-Crew feature today

  • penhalion 11/04/2017


    Yea about that...
    Reply -1
  • British terror hoaxer charged after US gamer shot by cops

  • penhalion 11/04/2017

    20 years in prison for making the call seems extremely harsh to me, it was the incompetence of the police that was the real problem. You shouldn't be raiding a house and shooting someone with a single phone call as your only evidence.
    20 years is about right. With all of the heightened fear around terror attacks and people using anything they can get their hands on to perpetrate them it needs to be made clear this kind of thing is not a joke. It needs to be made very very clear that you loose your freedom if you do this childish thing.

    You say that the police should have checked and that's partly true but, here's the thing. The incident line is not a publicly known number. It's not a number that Joe Public will have in their head when calling in an incident. Joe public will call 911. So any calls to the hotline number are by definition taken very seriously. The threat of jail time for it's misuse is also stressed so for these guys to STILL think it was ok to prank like this needs to be made an example of.
    Reply -1
  • BioWare apologises for Mass Effect: Andromeda's poor transgender representation

  • penhalion 06/04/2017

    This nonsense is exactly what I said was going to happen. It was a non-issue. It wasn't even offensive to Trans people. It was basically some twat from EG deciding to champion a cause that he knew nothing about.

    Well done there sir!

    *slow clap*
    Reply +12
  • Watchdog bans Mobile Strike ad featuring curvy models in bikinis

  • penhalion 05/04/2017

    @Hadji_Murad soooo you didn't ctually watch the ad then... Reply -29
  • Zelda patch improves frame-rate on Switch

  • penhalion 03/04/2017

    Perhaps they've also adjusted the red moon mechanic to stop it mass triggering or triggering during boss fights, for some cuss inducing player responses. Reply +1
  • Agents of Mayhem comes out in August

  • penhalion 03/04/2017

    Sounds great but, not sure about the "swap between three agents" mechanic. I know that I rarely do the whole dynamic swap thing when available. If I like a character I tend to just stick with that cussing and cursing when I get cheap'ed due to attacks not working or whatever. I rarely think "I should swap to team member X now to take out object Y"

    Will likely buy this but, need to see some actual mission gameplay.
    Reply +2
  • Destiny 2 expansion art points to Osiris, Rasputin add-ons

  • penhalion 03/04/2017

    Been helping some old friends do the new revised crota over the weekend and it just highlighted to me why I left the game in the first place. As far as I can tell Destiny 2 seems to be the "Cabal" raid that everyone expected to be in destiny 1 when you got to Mars. I can't see that Bungie have learnt anything from D1. D2 is just D1 with an updated engine as far as I can make out. Bungie again forcing people to re-grind for the stuff they already had. It's not even like they are trying to hide it!

    Alarm bell moments from the reveal trailer:-

    1. Cayde's joke about them blowing up all our stuff. Er well that's impossible because my stuff was with me at the time. So what did they do? Knock on my ship door and politely ask me to space my gear?!? Fek off!

    2. The last city falling. So everyone is dead war's over Cabal won...ok cool I'll just stand about shuffling like the undead thing I'm supposed to be. I mean it's not like there was an evolved Warmind or anything that would have seen this coming and nuked the Cabal before they even got to orbit....oh wait!

    3. So wait. The traveller's light was bogus then because the Cabal just know..flew under it and took everything without a single peep from the thing that is apparently forming a light barrier around the last wait what?

    If this is the great new, interesting and integrated story then yea I'll pass. I bet the exotics in D2 are even just exactly the same as D1. I mean how different can one exotic rocket launcher be to another. This is all just a huge and quite frankly very sad excuse to get the stupid people back onto their hamster wheels. Like putting a nut on the wheel so your hamster climbs in and then he's suddenly running again with a nut in his mouth and a puzzled look on his dumb face.

    Edit: Everyone (myself included) saying that they seem very reluctant to show gameplay. Let's be honest with ourselves. What can they show? A guardian that looks your old Guardian...running about with a hand cannon that looks that a (insert suprise coloured bullets/element here) fatebringer shooting Cabal beserker units with dual swords. At this point some dumb ass is going to speculate that we will be able to dual wield swords and how amazing it will be. There will be the inevitable playthrough scene of a developer shooting or sending into battle some kind of pet. The Cabal has those big dog things in the raid on the city so we'll probably get to tame one of those in DLC-2 or Year 2 or whenever that cut functionality is stitched back in (for those saying that's harsh you might want to remember sparrow racing, the tracks for which and the evidence of sparrow racing being a thing were found in destiny way back in year one!)
    Reply -1
  • Oculus co-founder Palmer Luckey departs Facebook

  • penhalion 31/03/2017

    "Palmer will be dearly missed. Palmer's legacy extends far beyond Oculus.
    Yes those law suits were quite a nice suprise for facebook I suspect.

    His inventive spirit helped kickstart the modern VR revolution and helped build an industry.
    er ok....

    We're thankful for everything he did for Oculus and VR, and we wish him all the best."
    Yea it's not quite panned out as expected has it and the prices make ordinary Joe Public actually laugh out going well then...

    I guess a certain someone else is next out the door. Not sure what the acceptable time between oustings is so will watch the headlines in a week or two.
    Reply +3
  • Thimbleweed Park review

  • penhalion 31/03/2017

    I'm alone in this obviously but, this is the second Cassandra review that is just plain over the top and quite frankly bordering on the annoying. It's like someone gave the reviewing duties to their teenage artsy and annoying daughter to shut her up. Seriously. If this is meant to be humour it's missing the mark by a long shot. Reply +18
  • BioWare issues statement on Mass Effect Andromeda future

  • penhalion 30/03/2017

    The one good thing to come out of this fiasco and that of "No Man's Sky" is that people are becoming very wary of listening to press hype and buying things on pre-order or on day one.

    It's starting to hit sales of all the major houses so I'm guessing, if they actually want to stay in business, they're going to have to start releasing finished products instead of patching them after taking people's money.

    I fully expect to see the wise companies delaying things if they aren't actually release ready in time. The winner of the race to regain credibility and with it the game buyers purse strings is going to be the one that has the bottle to announce the delays in the share holder meeting first.
    Reply +7
  • penhalion 30/03/2017

    the game's lacklustre character creator
    Yea but, how did this turn out worse than ME 2? That's the 50k question!
    Reply 0
  • Persona 5 review

  • penhalion 29/03/2017

    I was going to buy this anyway but, this review is a can I put this...over the top. Reply +1
  • GAME profits fall after disappointing Christmas sales

  • penhalion 29/03/2017

    @FrostedSloth Sadly as true as your statement is. Game is actually cheaper than a digital only copy that can't even be traded back in when it turns out to be crap! Reply 0
  • Destiny 2 teaser shows the Tower going up in flames

  • penhalion 29/03/2017

    no frikkin' way am I day one-ing this. No way no how! They've burned me too much. If anything the tower burning probably represents what Bungie plan to do to the D2 players. They will look back in hindsight at this trailer and realise it was a stark warning for the fate they willingly ran headlong into. Reply -3
  • The joy of Rime and the petrification of indie gaming

  • penhalion 29/03/2017

    @jeremycomans Glad someone called this articles BS. Indies don't somehow make free money from their asses. The aim is to create something you love AND make money from it and have a frikkin' roof!

    This article exists only because it's thought of as being some romantic artsy thing to be an indie. Suffering for your art. Well here's the thing. The game you've chosen to champion was dropped by Microsoft because they saw no finish line from the devs and this was repeated by Sony when they too couldn't pin the devs down to a release window.

    There's nothing romantic or sympathetic about Rime's devs they were just either A) really f^&king slow at getting work done or B) just thought they would get free money from Microsoft and Sony and dragged the project on as long as possible. Even now after all this time the game has issue which point to it now being a rush job to get out the door. Thing is you have to ask how a game in production for so long is now being rushed out the door at the end! What exactly was happening over these many years?

    That's the article that should have been written. The one that flags how some Indies are Indie in name only and not in attitude or ethics.
    Reply -1
  • Mass Effect Andromeda and the quest for great facial animation

  • penhalion 29/03/2017

    Given Mass effect 1, 2 and 3 all had much higher production value than Andromeda and that Andromeda has actually had a longer production cycle. It is mind boggling why EG and others are now trying to create a positive spin on what is an inexcusably mediocre game.

    At least it was mind boggling until you realise that advertising pays for the site. Integrity be damned eh EG!
    Reply +5
  • Jumanji sequel features a magical video game, not a board game

  • penhalion 28/03/2017

    Yep I reacted in suprise too at this nonsense. How difficult would it have been to start the movie with the sound of those drums playing and someone fishing the game out of the river in which is was tossed.

    How was this not the no-brain opening to the new movie? HOW!
    Reply +5
  • Nintendo Switch unlocks a hidden menu screen when you own lots of games

  • penhalion 28/03/2017

    @imagonnawin lol I have a switch and I have Zelda and snipper clips and I was thinking the same exact thing i.e. I'm not sure I'll ever see this menu change! I mean so far on my radar is Xenosaga chronicles 2, Mario, Mario Cart and that's pretty much it as the Zelda new story mode of Breath isn't a new game as such. I literally can't name another 9 titles I even know about or will buy..oh maybe the punching one... Reply +2
  • penhalion 28/03/2017

    O_o don't care....
    Reply +2
  • Here's what Lara Croft looks like in the new Tomb Raider movie

  • penhalion 28/03/2017

    Dear lord that sounds......dull Reply +2
  • Mass Effect Andromeda is another failure for trans representation

  • penhalion 28/03/2017

    I'm sorry did I miss something? Is Mass Effect Andromeda an 18 game?

    I rarely get annoyed with an article but, this one seems a tad ridiculous. There will be very few 14 year olds that A) give two figs about whether a character is "Trans" and B) even have a frikkin' clue what that involves beyond a school yard chuckle. Yet the article writer is somehow expecting this character, who you meet once if you can actually be bothered to do the side missions, isn't fleshed out enough. By this logic I could argue that a lot of the straight characters we meet are shallow and not fleshed out. Surely that guy living in the power station that tells us how to put the power back on should have had a long meaningful piece about why he was in there and what lead to this development in his life?!? Rightly not one of you here would really agree with that because the character was/is irrelevant to the game's core story beyond being a human shaped switch!

    My point is (if there even should be one) that equality means ultimately banality! When a race, gender and orientation are truly accepted as equal then not being fleshed out correctly or some writer botching some lines in a B-Movie plot game should be the norm. It shouldn't be a story at all. Anymore than this article would have been written about the power guy I mentioned earlier. We just don't give a toss! Now if the Trans character had been portrayed as a homicidal, split personality, Psycho hotel owning person BECAUSE they were trans. I'd have an issue with that! That they are portrayed as trivial is a non issue as that describes 90% of the characters in the game. Equally bad treatment for all seems to be this games main theme so making a story from a non story that no-one even noticed is idiotic and screams of a "I'm a special snowflake NOTICE MEEEE!!" kind of attitude! The exact opposite of what Trans people are trying to accomplish!
    Reply +6
  • Mass Effect Andromeda physical launch sales down on ME3

  • penhalion 27/03/2017

    Woahh! 2nd playthrough??! I've only just established Prodromas outpost on Eos and have played the game for 20 hours. You must be eating that game! Enjoy!
    You serious?!? It's pretty impossible to spend 20 hours and not have established the colony! Why? because it's the only planet unlocked at the start aside from the nexus. The nexus side quests require you to get your ship and go there after a few hours of play! There is literally not 4 hours let alone 20 hours of nexus play until you go to eos!

    Edit: Being fair it's possible to be really bad at the game and take ages on the first mission but, the nexus is a lot of fetch quests with no combat at all and few people around to even talk to you before eos is unlocked.

    I swear it's getting silly with the amount of posts that read like companies trying to do damage control with fake accounts and bogus big ups to mediocre AAA games!
    Reply -6
  • Fake news! Did Final Fantasy 15's reworked Chapter 13 just get political?

  • penhalion 27/03/2017

    @NullDev Naw dude I've seen some of those cave paintings and there's no way that thin dude with the blunt stick killed that mammoth! Seems there's no escaping fake news. Reply +15
  • Meeting Andrzej Sapkowski, the writer who created The Witcher

  • penhalion 24/03/2017

    Nice photo. Seriously though. That's one dude who's hand should be shaken on site by anyone who's ever played one of the witcher games. He's responsible for a lot of hours of quality fun and it's only right to let him know his work is appreciated. Reply +17
  • A Switch is for life, not just for Zelda

  • penhalion 24/03/2017



    Hope that's sarcasm....waiting for the new version to show up 2 - 3 years down the theXBox One S and PS4 Pro and Slim....yea because that's a sign of component quality isn't it...or the fact that a guy cut the thing into a bloomin' tri-force sculpture and it was the drills water cooling that kiled the console and not the f-ing great hole cut right through it's's a weak ass, poorly built beast isn't it....
    Reply -3
  • Wonder Boy 3 remake introduces new playable lead: Wonder Girl

  • penhalion 23/03/2017

    You know what. For years I've said (on these forums a lot too) why the heck do AAA and other games not just have a female and male character for the gamer to play. I've always liked this about mass effect. You had male and female Shepard and now brother and sister Ryder. These are fantasy worlds after all and you only really get truly immersed in them if you can play as the character you most identify with. Some girls will identify with wonder boy, some with wonder girl and the same for boys.

    The point is the choice should be down to the player in all but, the most story critical games or those based on non-interactive media such as comics and films. Even then it's not a very far stretch to write for both genders and introduce an equivalent male or female character.

    We should all be aiming for these kinds of stories to elicit nothing more than a simple "Oh I wonder how wonder girl will play" response and not a batted eyelid. The fact that anyone is upset by this change should make those people take a long hard look at themselves and ask why are they even bothered by such a positive change.
    Reply +3
  • How to actually enjoy Mass Effect: Andromeda

  • penhalion 23/03/2017

    The fact that this article exists bothers me a lot. The game is bad so a guide on how to enjoy a game that has turned out to be a tedious filler packed mess is just insane. The reality is that, until it's patched, the animations fixed and the story well quite frankly re-written for the most part. It isn't worth getting.

    If all of the above was done then the game itself would warrant a re-review. At that stage it will either be a worthy successor to the ME franchise or a sigh and a ho-hum.

    Either way both the article and the idiots (yes they are definitely idiots) telling people to ignore the reviews and myriad of bugs and simply waste 60 quid to "Judge for yourself" shouldn't be taken seriously at all. No-one and I mean no-one should be expected to spend 60 quid on an unfinished game to "try it for themselves". If this is genuinely the attitude a lot of the posts below have then put YOUR money where your mouth is and buy it for everyone who has wisely decided to walk away in disgust at how this mess was even released.
    Reply +4
  • BioWare mulls Mass Effect Andromeda animation, character creator improvements

  • penhalion 22/03/2017

    "We're looking at patching lots of issues and want to strongly support the game moving forward," lead designer Ian S. Frazier wrote
    This basically equates to "We're still finishing the game but, want you to pay for it while we do"
    Reply +12