monkeyspasm Comments

  • The man who played Football Manager for a world record 150 years

  • monkeyspasm 03/11/2016

    I still play CM 01-02 constantly. It works on Android tablets using the Exagear Strategies emulator! :) Reply +1
  • Sir Clive Sinclair crowdfunding new ZX Spectrum computer

  • monkeyspasm 02/12/2014

    Apparently there's an on-screen keyboard, which is the worst idea ever, that won't work for games or coding. Just make the Speccy, with up-to-date internals and games on SD. And as for (I quote from the Indiegogo page) 'The Sinclair Spectrum Vega is as simple to use as any of the popular games consoles, but far less expensive.' It's Ł100! You can get an Xbox 360 for that! Reply +1
  • Keeping the game alive

  • monkeyspasm 03/10/2013

    Heh. I still play this nearly every lunchtime, but not with updated squads. I just play with generated players.

    It had the perfect balance. Just can't get into the newer ones, haven't got the time!
    Reply +9
  • OnLive app rolling out for iPad, Android tablets

  • monkeyspasm 08/12/2011

    Yeah, works really well on Galaxy S2, much better than I thought. Just been playing DIRT 3 and Virtua Tennis 2009. Display seems a bit dark though (and the Galaxy S2 is mega bright) - a brightness setting would be good.

    Touchscreen controls worked better than I expected, just have to see if my 4Mb internet at home can handle it.

    No sign of free Lego Batman though!?
    Reply +1
  • Turning Your Android Phone into a Retro Gaming Powerhouse

  • monkeyspasm 05/12/2011

    MAME4Droid is a million times better than Tiger Arcade. Smoother, better touchscreen controls and more compatibility.

    Also, the touchscreen controls on N64oid are great, much better than on FPSE, so I tend to play N64 stuff rather than PSX. I've managed to get really far in Goldeneye on a touchscreen, which is preposterous!

    Of the rest, Gameboid is the best GBA emulator, GBC A.D is the best Gameboy / GB Colour emulator and Ataroid is the best Atari 2600 emulator I reckon.
    Reply +4
  • Sega Rally Online Arcade

  • monkeyspasm 19/05/2011

    '[...]I think the 'lack of stuff' is the strength. Arcade racers lately have suffered from too many tweaks and options, even Ridge Racer 7 had all that stupid customization and boost types.
    I just want to go fast round a brightly coloured track. There are so few games that just let you do that now.'

    liveinabin has it right, absolutely spot on. My thoughts exactly. Focused, fast and fun.
    Reply +1
  • monkeyspasm 19/05/2011

    Fluffy - bit harsh, a lot of the best racing games are 30fps.

    The PGR games being one example, also Dirt 2, F1 2010 at the other end of the realism scale being another.

    Rock steady 30fps is fine, when games drop from 60 to 30 it's worse.

    We need a new gen on consoles to get a steady 60fps with a reasonable quality of visuals on fast paced games.
    Reply +4
  • SEGA Rally Online Arcade - first 15 mins

  • monkeyspasm 19/05/2011

    It's Sega Rally 3 from the arcade (which itself was based on Revo but with a few tweaks - IMO better handling), with the cars from Revo.Great game, absolutely loving it so far. Reply 0
  • PES 2010 patch and free DLC

  • monkeyspasm 22/12/2009

    Mine doesn't seem to crash if I don't press a button to skip the tunnel sequence. Reply 0
  • PES 2010: Pro Evolution Soccer

  • monkeyspasm 15/10/2009

    Ah, I see they've posted a news article about the FIFA patch, so they have mentioned it. Reply +2
  • monkeyspasm 15/10/2009

    No mention at all from EG of the masses of bugs in FIFA 10?

    This is my only option really as some of the bugs in FIFA are shocking.
    Reply +1
  • Dreamcast PSN releases possible?

  • monkeyspasm 22/09/2009

    Ferrari F355 Challenge please! Reply 0
  • PES 2010 demo now on Live, PSN

  • monkeyspasm 17/09/2009

    It's not on PSN yet. Reply 0
  • GH5 is "a massive leap" for Wii games

  • monkeyspasm 04/08/2009

    Good tracklist too.

    I can't believe Rock Band 2 has still not been released in the UK for Wii - latest is September.

    Looks like GH will get my money again, World Tour & Legends of Rock batter Rock Band Wii into submission.
    Reply +2
  • Miis will work in Guitar Hero 5

  • monkeyspasm 03/08/2009

    Um, you can use Miis in Mii freestyle mode in World Tour. Reply 0
  • Editor's blog: Grand Slam Tennis to be re-reviewed

  • monkeyspasm 19/06/2009

    Well done EG - very impressed. Reply +2
  • F1 2009

  • monkeyspasm 27/05/2009

    I'll carry on playing F! CE, thanks.

    Christ, that looks awful.
    Reply 0
  • Rock Band

  • monkeyspasm 22/01/2009

    Bit late innit?

    It's been out for months on Wii - I've had it since last September, RB2's pencilled in for the end of this month IIRC!

    Review is spot on though IMO. Guitar Hero World Tour is very good on Wii.
    Reply 0
  • The Casuals Are Coming!

  • monkeyspasm 12/08/2008

    I play tons of retro games, was hopelessly addicted to Galaxian, adored the Speccy - and I honestly think gaming's never been in a better state. The sheer diversity is amazing - there are games to suit all tastes.

    Personally, I'd rather play Wii Sports or Guitar Hero than Age of Empires or whatever, but I can see why people would like that sort of game. I used to play loads of Championship Manager, but I've neither the time or inclination now. So I stick the Wii on and try and beat some hiscores.

    Surely we should just enjoy the fact that we're all well catered for, and gaming has never been more diverse, sociable and fun.
    Reply 0
  • monkeyspasm 12/08/2008

    Yeah, games for me got 'hardcore' (in the inaccessible sense) when I got a 386 and started trying to install games in DOS.

    Cue endless tweaking with graphic and sound card setups to get games to work. Think PCs are a pain now? They bloody were then! Luckily I had patience and time on my hands then, I'd never bother with all that now.

    Sod that, pass me the Wiimote.
    Reply 0
  • monkeyspasm 12/08/2008

    Very good article IMO - and I know what krudster means, too. My favourite game is Galaxian - is that casual or hardcore? I'd guess at hardcore (certainly in terms of difficulty & being able to play it well) - but it's also easy to pick up and play. So hmmm.

    My point (like Dan's) is - there's no casual or hardcore, just games. So-called 'hardcore' gamers are silly, whiny idiots. It's a good thing IMO that my mum and wife want to play Wii Fit - acceptance for my hobby / more people to play with!

    I love stuff like Wii Sports, Wii Play and Guitar Hero because I love trying to beat my own hiscores, that comes from being raised on 80s arcade games. Personally, I can't stand games that take loads of buttons (with the exception of Street Fighter 2) - I get bored before I even start.

    Most of the games people see as casual I don't at all - Wii Sports, Guitar Hero and Wii Play may be accessible, sociable and easy to pick up but they're quite hard to master.

    The endless stream of shite copycat party games after Wii Sports can fuck right off, though.
    Reply 0
  • The Eurogamer TV Show: Comic-Con 2008

  • monkeyspasm 06/08/2008

    Great show - funny stuff, loved Ellie's Rock Band show too. No-one does bored sarcasm better! Reply 0
  • Sensible World of Soccer 96/97

  • monkeyspasm 27/06/2007

    'Rather than try and cobble together an approximation from the ground up, this is as close to the the real deal as humanly possible'

    Wow! They managed to get the game / visuals AS CLOSE AS HUMANLY POSSIBLE to a game from 1996/7 (which was itself graphically identical to the first Sensi in '92). Jesus.

    Now, SWOS is / was a great game, but I'm never trusting EG's overly-glowing fanboy reviews anywhere near anything by Codemasters / Jon Hare / Kuju. This is not by Sensible Software. I wasted enough cash on a broken, unfinished, unplayable mess when I bought Sensi 06, thanks.

    'Unfortunately the build shown to us wasn't functional in the classic mode, but we were assured that the visuals were left exactly as they were in the Amiga version if users really want to play it as Jon Hare and co. intended.)'

    So you haven't seen the classic mode - which is all a lot of people will be interested in. But don't worry! They've assured you it's the same!

    Didn't they also assure you that they'd fix the (many, none of which were mentioned in your review) bugs in Sensi '06 before release?

    Jon Hare trying to say that the warping goalkeepers were 'a feature' and that 'feature' was also present in the first Sensi made me extremely cynical.

    I love retro games, but I definitely won't be giving Codemasters any money again.
    Reply 0
  • Super Stardust HD

  • monkeyspasm 18/06/2007

    1080p without a hint of slowdown!?

    It's Asteroids - albeit prettier - I'd be more than a tad disappointed if it didn't run at 1080p on PS3 without a hint of slowdown, personally.
    Reply 0
  • Commodore opens doors

  • monkeyspasm 23/04/2007

    Site looks like it was knocked up in ten minutes too.

    Bleurgh. They've tried to go for the 'never mind the price, look at the quality' angle, but Alienware are cheaper and look nicer, for a start.

    They should've gone for mid-range PCs branded heavily with their (still hugely recognisable) logo, and got a shedload of publishers to rework their old classics. Maybe preloading each one with not only old emulated games, but also an exhaustive history of Commodore and its machines (ie Vic-20 stuff etc.), to satisfy the real retro nuts.

    5 grand? Never. What a disaster.
    Reply 0
  • Paperboy

  • monkeyspasm 18/02/2007

    '...hopelessly incapable of displaying the colourful, isometric, pin-sharp visuals with any accuracy, never mind the scrolling streets. So, if you're one of the unfortunates who shelled out your pocket money haplessly for those travesties back in 1986,'

    Travesties!? Ask anyone who reviewed games then and they'd tell you they were extremely faithful conversions (at least gameplay-wise, which is something you seem to forget).

    It was taken as a given that a Speccy could never replicate an arcade machine visually. Just arcade machine from the mid-80's could never replicate a 360 visually, eh? But that's missing the point, because all we care about is gameplay, right? Right? I thought that was the whole point of retro gaming. So to criticise 8-bit conversions is a tad unfair.

    The programmers in all those cases did a great job IMO.
    Reply 0
  • monkeyspasm 18/02/2007

    Gah. The home conversions by Elite were excellent, all of 'em.

    Paperboy, Ghosts 'n' Goblins, Commando (ESPECIALLY Commando) and Bomb Jack were superb conversions given the limitations of the hardware they were ported to, the gameplay was largely intact.
    Reply 0
  • Geometry Wars: Retro Evolved

  • monkeyspasm 17/04/2006

    The posters huffing & puffing about Stuart seem to know a rather disturbing amount about him - it would suggest that some have a rather unhealthy (and possibly long-standing) grudge against him.

    Comments like 'Go play with your rat', I mean.

    I just think there are a lot of blinkered idiots here these days. And Stuart's not one of 'em. He's a well respected writer, who has justified his stance completely. Unlike some of you ridiculous, easily outraged cretins who can't back up their argument.

    He didn't link to his article. He merely defended it when others GOT THE FACTS WRONG.

    A bit abrasively, yes. But Stuart Campbell IS well known - I'd imagine it's not great fun having your work slagged incorrectly on the internet when a lot of people know who you are.

    It doesn't matter if some of you -shock- don't use pseudonyms, the vast majority don't know (or care) who you are.

    And as for the chap saying 'Actually, forget the drink' as though he'd care that you don't want to go for a pint with him (and you suggested it in the first place sounding serious...!). That's just spooky, man.

    It's like a nasty, spiteful vendetta with some of you lot. You like the thrill of an industry figure arguing back, admit it.

    You all sound like Comic Book Guy from The Simpsons.

    Give it a rest, eh.
    Reply 0
  • Sonic Rush

  • monkeyspasm 30/11/2005

    I agreed with Walker though.

    Criticism of reviewers has got just...daft lately.

    You don't agree with a review? Fine. But I distinctly recall someone calling for Mr. Walker's head on a plate yesterday, which prompted my criticism in the forum.

    edit - and re-reading, KM's last post is incredibly childish. 'You should delete your posts as they'll harm EG'? What?

    Not as much as yours, pal.

    It's laughable. Get a grip, guys.
    Reply 0
  • Mashed: Fully Loaded

  • monkeyspasm 05/04/2005

    It's a superb party game.

    One player mode is meh to say the least, but 4 people bellowing insults at each other - you can keep Live play as far as I'm concerned.

    One of the best multiplayer games ever IMO.
    Reply 0
  • Sensible Soccer

  • monkeyspasm 18/02/2005

    I've since played this for an hour or so.

    I take back my previous comments - I was unaware the control system was 4 way and was having problems finding diagonals. As in the comment above, if you're running up, tapping left once gives diagonal up-left, left again gives left.

    It does take a fair bit of getting used to, but i've just had a go and I'm getting there. After some play I have to say it's as addictive as ever.
    Reply 0
  • monkeyspasm 17/02/2005

    Just tried it again - the speed is REALLY bad on my N-Gage.

    However - I did install it to MMC card. Anyone know if this could be what's slowing it down? ie the time taken to access the card or something? Or would the whole game just load into memory at once?
    Reply 0
  • Def Jam: Fight For New York

  • monkeyspasm 29/09/2004

    I actually think it's a good review. It's not like he slates the game, let's get some perspective here - 6/10 is not a bad score.

    And the premise of mainstream rap stars fighting each other IS slightly ridiculous in my opinion and indeed smacks of EA trying to be 'down wit da kids'.

    It's just a game. No need to get so heated.
    Reply 0
  • Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas

  • monkeyspasm 19/06/2004

    Oh dear.

    I blame the parents.
    Reply 0