jabberwoky Comments

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  • Bumming about with Butt Sniffin Pugs: a co-op dog simulator

  • jabberwoky 29/03/2015

    @AmorousBadger

    Yes, it was dogs life, I played the demo. Sniffing stuff got old pretty fast if I remember correctly.
    Reply 0
  • jabberwoky 29/03/2015

    There was a PS1 game where you got to play the role of a dog.

    It bombed.
    Reply +3
  • Cara Ellison on: #Fortune

  • jabberwoky 28/03/2015

    @spamdangled

    "he then ranted and accused EG of having quotas"

    You can rant if you want, a lot of people do on here including you, and I certainly have a go if I feel strongly about something. And if he thinks there are quotas, he is entitled to state that, he may even be right for all I know. But to be accused of sexism just because he called a woman a woman is beyond belief, try re-thinking your life.
    Reply +12
  • jabberwoky 28/03/2015

    @spamdangled

    "And you're the one that brought gender into it. "I think this WOMAN is catastrophically uninteresting"

    Absolutely! The word woman should be excised from the dictionary and everyone should be referred to as a person. Describing someone as a woman is inherently sexist.

    Some lunatic just HAD to turn this into a case of sexism, and that was you, congratulations. It seems its not possible to critisize this without some jerk coming out of the woodwork and proclaiming sexism. Have you any idea how depressing you are?
    Reply +14
  • jabberwoky 28/03/2015

    "the internet doesn't support me as loudly as it used to (sometimes I feel when I need it the most), it means the worst kind of people don't notice me as much. It makes for a quieter life where I don't punch holes like I used to, no one really pushes me, though the assholes still turn up as usual, waiting with a pickaxe made only for egos. So I can switch myself up and down as I like. There's no 'no' any more."

    Do we really need to know this? Do we, coming to EG to read about videogames, want to know this? Its the most self indulgent rubbish I think I have ever read, its only thin relevence to a video games site is some silly app which no videogamer would be intereted in anyway.

    This is a reflection on Eurogamers editorial policy, it lets down the whole site.
    Reply +14
  • Gaming convention threatens to abandon Indiana if anti-gay bill passes

  • jabberwoky 27/03/2015

    No, I do not agree with this bill, and if there is fallout like this over it no-one should be surprised. Reply +2
  • Borderlands: The Handsome Collection has 16GB day one patch on Xbox One

  • jabberwoky 26/03/2015

    Why are we doing this? Because we can abuse the internet and get away with it. And when everyone has done squeaking about it, we just pocket the £20 it would have cost to put it on disk, job done.

    Have a great day everyone.
    Reply +3
  • Dragon Age Inquisition: Jaws of Hakkon review

  • jabberwoky 26/03/2015

    @nathanthach

    "And what saddens me is how much this review and the public at large respond to the appearance of the game and show a surprising lack of disappointment at how bland the gameplay is and will continue to be."

    Actually, most comments on this game are negative in every article written so the public at large are not fooled. The review however is obviously written by someone who can't wait to collect his millionth shard and has no idea on how much of a travesty this is compared to DA1.
    Reply 0
  • jabberwoky 26/03/2015

    @dimasok

    "so I decided to romance absolutely no one else as a matter of principle (and because I didn't really feel like it)."

    How could you possibly resist the charms of Serah? You must be made of cast iron.
    Reply 0
  • jabberwoky 25/03/2015

    Great, beautiful areas, (it has to be said), but chock a block full of shallow fetch quests, 3 room caves with spiders in them, and several million things to collect. And the main story is 10 per cent of the game. Then there is the famous war table, where you send one of three people to do timed AUTO quests that AUTO SUCCEED.

    I never thought for one second that DA2 of all things would actually be better than this.
    Reply +1
  • Is Bloodborne the best game ever, or just the second best?

  • jabberwoky 24/03/2015

    I don't suppose there is a wimp mode......

    Not for me of course, its for a friend.
    Reply +7
  • First screenshots of Dragon Age: Inquisition single-player DLC

  • jabberwoky 24/03/2015

    @BoredGame

    "Ubisoft RPG™ is receiving a fun filled dlc featuring more dry and lifeless areas packed to the brim with things to collect, things to check off a list, things to press a button on and the all new, super thrilling, the critics are unanimous in their praise, things to mark off on a map...

    (Also featured are light rpg elements and poorly written and unconvincing generic fantasy trope ridden story elements")

    Excellent review! I must admit I have been a touch abrasive on the game, but I think you just shaded me there.
    Reply +1
  • jabberwoky 23/03/2015

    @Guy.J.

    They seemed to have been inspired by ubisoft, expect tons of icons on the map with pointless things to do, enabling them to boast about 100 hours of gameplay. The main story is 10% of the game and there are appx 10 maps full of some of the most inane sidequests ever designed. I spent 9 months on skyrim, gave up on this by map 6.
    Reply +1
  • jabberwoky 23/03/2015

    "Destroyed, winter shard. 3 of 200"

    The Witcher is going to piss all over this from a very great height.
    Reply +1
  • Geralt's beard grows as you play Witcher 3

  • jabberwoky 24/03/2015

    "When you download the free Beard and Hairstyle DLC."

    The suits at EA and Ubisoft will be choking on their cornflakes when they see the word free. Then trying to get their heads around the concept.
    Reply +11
  • Battlefield Hardline steals UK chart top spot

  • jabberwoky 23/03/2015

    Looks like The Order bombed. Its nowhere in sight. I wonder if they still think it was such a good idea to make a 5 hour game full of cinematics and QTEs? £54 for a weekend job. An overpriced DVD where you press a few buttons. Because making someone press triangle is so much easier than creating gameplay.

    What a joke.
    Reply -1
  • Batman: Arkham Knight delayed by a few weeks

  • jabberwoky 23/03/2015

    Looks identical gameplay to arkham city, and you can hardly see anything because its so dark.

    I thought the original asylum was brilliant, city was good but a step down.

    Probably worth getting overall though.
    Reply +3
  • Don't forget to download Bloodborne's 2.69GB day one patch

  • jabberwoky 23/03/2015

    @vert1go

    "Remember when people were whining about the size of that ~1Gb Wii U day one update that dealt with the entire system?

    Welcome to multiple times that for every game you want to play."

    Odd that you got so many negs for your post. There are always going to be nut jobs rolling up their shirt sleeves and striding forward to defend shameful practices by games companies, in this case abusing the internet.
    Reply -1
  • The best PS4 games

  • jabberwoky 23/03/2015

    @dogmanstaruk

    Indeed, so the more they push those games and praise them the more money they get. What could possibly go wrong.
    Reply +3
  • jabberwoky 23/03/2015

    This article comes across very poorly. First it describes the PS4 in such glowing terms, a sony PR rep could not have done better. Especially the first paragraph....yeeech. Its not for you to say PS plus is "great value". You are a news and journalist site. Then it has a dubious list of games bizarre by its omissions and inclusions. And those links to amazon.

    Please in future try not to make your amazon link articles look like advertising, because it does not help the tone of the site. I am assuming of course that there is no financial bias here, which I doubt there is, but the fact it occurs to me is not good.
    Reply +8
  • Rainbow Six: Siege closed alpha gameplay footage leaks

  • jabberwoky 23/03/2015

    Why the hell would you pre-order a game that could turn out to be pants, just so you can play a bugged B version and ruin the plot for yourself?

    Am I missing something?
    Reply +5
  • Tech Analysis: Final Fantasy 15 Episode Duscae

  • jabberwoky 21/03/2015

    @IronSoldier

    "However, we live in a world where The Order: 1866 with its letterboxed, sub-30fps, QTE-fest 'gaming' reached the top of the sales charts..."

    I wouldn't get too depressed, it didn't stay up there long and I have a feeling the studio are having lots and lots of second thoughts about their design decisions. Behind closed doors of course. The important thing is they got hammered for it which is good for gaming.
    Reply 0
  • jabberwoky 21/03/2015

    "As it stands, the action is extremely fast-paced and relies on players dashing and warping around the battlefield."

    This will always appeal to some people but I highly doubt many of them will be final fantasy fans.
    Reply +21
  • See which retro game consoles can survive a 15 foot drop

  • jabberwoky 21/03/2015

    That little console coming off the production line never thought it would end its days like this. Its given decades of good service, does it deserve such treatment? Reply +11
  • Rich Stanton on: Other worlds and the inner eye

  • jabberwoky 21/03/2015

    Very good article that goes to the heart of videogames today. I have just finished uncharted 1 having finally got round to getting a PS3. There is a section where you go uprivier on a jetski through a deserted city. Now if you compare that with the venice level in tomb raider 2, there is some similarity. But in TR2 you get a bit of shooting, but a lot of the time you meander round taking in the view at your own pace, and visit in any order you wish, various interesting locales each of which has a mechanic. When you have visited all of them you can put the whole lot together and solve the level. You are invested in discovering and using all those mechanics.

    In uncharted, you just go up the river shooting barrels and bad guys all the way. You don't even notice the scenery. Then you land and shoot a whole load more bad guys, rinse and repeat. Its only when I went all the way back, having shot everyone, that I realized how beautiful the environment was and how wasted it had been.

    I am definitely spending less on videogames now, and only buying the ones that still have real gameplay in them. Fortunately some modern games do that, like dishonoured.
    Reply 0
  • New PS4 patch boosts Resi Revelations 2 performance

  • jabberwoky 20/03/2015

    Why bother releasing finished games when you can abuse the internet. Reply +1
  • Resident Evil Revelations 2 review

  • jabberwoky 20/03/2015

    @flippet

    Short of a brain lobotomy I don't really think I will forget it. I was being flippant. So all the way through the game I will be thinking, wonder when that mansion is going to show up. The one thats supposed to be a big surprise. And, the mine section is probably next. Apparently this sewer is going to be huge according to the EG review. I would like to have thought, wow that was spectacularly long after I beat it. Not before.
    Reply -1
  • jabberwoky 20/03/2015

    "The small island setting isn't enormously coherent, containing as it does a prison, various residential camps, a sewer system worthy of New York, a mine, a small mansion, and of course a huge underground lab."

    Thanks for all the spoilers in the review. I now know exactly where I will be playing when I play. And thanks for telling me that when I go to the mock mansion, (which itself was probably supposed to have been a surprise) that it only lasts a short time. I would like to have found that out for myself.

    I will now try my best to forget all that.
    Reply -1
  • Final Fantasy Type-0 HD review

  • jabberwoky 20/03/2015

    @apoc_reg

    "In all seriousness this no score thing... while admirable, just isnt working."

    The fact it doesn't have a score is still a measure. Its not reccommended, or essential, or to avoid. So it must be.......a game that isn't one of those. I think that gives as good an indication as any score, and being in 4 categories is clearer and more decisive. Whats the difference between 7 and 8 out of 10, let alone 77 and 83. The difference is simply arcane.
    Reply +2
  • Car Mechanic Simulator 2015 out in April

  • jabberwoky 19/03/2015

    Can't wait for plumber simulator to hit. Reply +2
  • Nintendo NX is "new hardware with a brand new concept"

  • jabberwoky 19/03/2015

    @A-bob-omb

    I think you underestimate 3rd party appeal. You should know that you and your brother do not equate to everyone in the world. I for example am interested in the range of product on a console before I buy, and so are many others.
    Reply 0
  • jabberwoky 17/03/2015

    @A-bob-omb

    I am the same as you, in continually going back to older games, so graphics are not everything. But every none nintendo game would have been released on the ps3 as well, with a far bigger catalogue on it, so why buy a wii u? Its nintendo games are not sufficient in quantity. A PS4 lite wii u would have gotten unique 3rd party games, while still being cheap to produce.

    I don't tend to do nintendo much myself, but I like the fact they are a dedicated games company, and hope they do well. And I would have been more likely to get a wii u if they had followed the line above. There is just not enough on there if you are not into mario, zelda or that kart thing.
    Reply -2
  • jabberwoky 17/03/2015

    @electrolite

    "When did they release a machine with similar power to the PS3 ten years after the PS3? The PS3 isn't ten years old yet".

    Oh well, thats my entire point utterly destroyed then. Congratulations on exposing this monumental mistake to the world.
    Reply -2
  • jabberwoky 17/03/2015

    @A-bob-omb

    I agree graphics are not everything and don't mind them not majoring on that. But releasing a machine that was similar in power to a ps3 10 years after the ps3 was released really is extracting the michael.
    Reply +1
  • jabberwoky 17/03/2015

    The brand new concept is probably to use graphics technology that is not 10 years old.

    Might work for them I guess, who knows.
    Reply 0
  • World Bank exec discovers son spent $4500 on FIFA packs

  • jabberwoky 18/03/2015

    He should not blame his own stupidity and his sons proclivity for stealing money from his parents on an industrial scale, on microsoft.

    And how did someone that dumb get a senior position in the world bank?
    Reply +13
  • PlayStation Now closed beta begins this spring in UK

  • jabberwoky 17/03/2015

    Wouldn't it be rather annoying if your broadband has hiccups? And wouldn't it be even more annoying if it stopped every so often, like mine does? Reply +1
  • PlayStation just brought in £3bn for Sony

  • jabberwoky 17/03/2015

    Sony deserve their success for excluding online authentication and keeping used games in their console. And microsoft deserved a damned good hiding which has been duly handed out. Reply +3
  • Xbox Live and PS Plus subs now used to calculate UK inflation

  • jabberwoky 17/03/2015

    Well if thats what people spend their money on why not? But why are housing costs excluded? Because, last I heard, people spend rather more on that.

    Its odd isn't it. Doesn't really do much for the accuracy of inflation does it.
    Reply +1
  • Bloodborne's combat convinced me I don't need a sword and shield any more

  • jabberwoky 16/03/2015

    @Mar27w

    Well you had more fortitude than me, I got fed up by the second boss, I could see that would be the pattern.
    Reply +1
  • jabberwoky 16/03/2015

    I didn't mind dying a lot in dark souls, and the combat was great. What I did not like was having the nearest save point miles from the boss, with all the enemies in between reset. Thats why I gave up on it. If the save had been closer to the boss I would have probably finished it.

    This looks to be the same.
    Reply +5
  • Shards, side-quests and DLC: a mini-Inquisition with the boss of Dragon Age

  • jabberwoky 14/03/2015

    @roughsleeper

    "I think it's a valid point mate. Not sure whether creative barriers or financial marketing caused Ubisoft to go in this direction"

    I have given this some thought, and I actually believe that ubisoft saw how successful GTA was with all those little icons on the map and little minigames, and decided to copy it.....in pretty much all of their games. It was a blatant rippoff. There are so many similarities. Of course what works in a semi jokey open world messaboutathon does not work in say far cry. The original far cry was immersive and realistic, a totally innapropriate vehicle for that. It comes down to copying stuff that seems to work in other games, ie creative dead end.
    Reply +4
  • jabberwoky 13/03/2015

    @janishewski

    I judge his creativity by the game which he is responsible for and which I bought and then sold because it was cack, costing me money. Regarding your assertion that I am petty, feel good about dumping on people, that I have no clue about games development and have no skill and am not an adult. You have no idea of my background, experience or qualities as a person. These are simply gratuitous insults with no evidence to back them up, other than you don't care for my views. So what does that say about you?

    As for my "magnus opus", with decades of gaming, both computer, wargaming, fantasy roleplaying, I do believe I could put something together which would involve more than kill X, one of X over and over and over and over again.
    Reply +2
  • jabberwoky 13/03/2015

    "Dragon Age's creative director Mike Laidlaw"

    What is creative about making a game that is 90 per cent fetch/kill X of 200?

    Seriously, how the hell can he call himself a creative director? The average 7 year old at school could come up with more imagination than that. Creative developer. Haw Haw Haw.

    Pull the other one, its got bells on.
    Reply -3
  • jabberwoky 13/03/2015

    @roughsleeper

    Considering how long your post is I am quite surprised that I agreed wholeheartedly with every point you make. Its patently obvious the bioware poodles under their EA masters threw in ubisofts collectothon icon infested maps with their mass shallow immersion breaking miniquests to try to get more sales from casuals.

    Now we know why the game is 100 hours long, automate the first map with icons and copy it for every subsequent map.

    There are two basic facts. No 1 most of the game is killing or collecting weasels backsides. No 2 the rest, the main quest is 10% of the game. In the original DA one, there was story everywhere, and you got to talk to people in game, not just cut scenes, who gave you lots of background info. The sidequests were light filler.

    And I love the way he says, don't do them then. What the hell else are you supposed to do when they are 90% of the game?

    The game is a joke. The fact it got some gongs shows how shallow the games industry has got.
    Reply +2
  • Here's the first image of Halo 3: ODST on Xbox One

  • jabberwoky 13/03/2015

    I think the best halo was one, but ODST was very very good, and I wish bungie had gone with the template for halo reach.

    It was so spooky going through those streets not quite sure what would come up. And its the only halo where two hunters followed me upstairs where I had gone to snipe them from afar. I looked through the scope and they had gone. Seconds later one of them came crashing through the door. I came second.
    Reply +12
  • Phil Spencer's new vision for the Xbox One

  • jabberwoky 13/03/2015

    When he says its great that the PS4 is selling so well, I can't help feeling that, deep down inside, he rather wishes they weren't. Reply +8
  • PS4 update 2.50 to add Suspend/Resume feature

  • jabberwoky 12/03/2015

    @eozgonul

    Yes, that looks right. How was I supposed to get that. Bet you had to look it up.
    Reply +1
  • jabberwoky 12/03/2015

    So, who is going to be the guinney....guiney....ginny....however the hell you spell it, pig to find out if it screws the console around?

    Still some great features there.
    Reply +1
  • Play Dragon Age: Inquisition free for six hours on Xbox One this week

  • jabberwoky 11/03/2015

    "Still, that's hardly a crime, and one more than made up for by the many high points that I can't name directly for fear of spoilers, the hours and hours both adventuring in Thedas as it was always meant to be, and sitting at the highest levels of its politics."

    What high points were those? Finding your 30th squirrels arse out of 40? And as for the highest levels of politics, would that be the bit in the game where you send one of 3 people on a timed mission that auto succeeds over and over again?

    In all honesty that is the second dragon age review that fooled me from EG and I am not impressed. Its just a ubisoft collectothon of a game with lousy characters.

    Anyone playing this for the 6 hours, get used to the repetitiveness of the first maps, the main questline is 10% of the game. And good luck with Sera.
    Reply -1