VibratingDonkey Comments

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  • Nintendo's precarious reveal runs risk of Switching off fans

  • VibratingDonkey 13/01/2017

    There's a bunch of valid questions and complaints, but looking at how I'd use the thing (play exclusive single player games on TV) many of them are kind of irrelevant. I might still be interested, but not until Holiday 2017.

    It costing more than a PS4 or Xbox One is kind of an issue to me. The same issue I had/have with the Wii U. I don't really care at all about the portable aspect, making that the opposite of a value add to me, as it's why the system has to be so energy efficient/kinda weak, and only has 32GB of storage. I.e. stuff I care more about.

    I'm hoping for eventual bundles to make up for it.
    Reply +2
  • VibratingDonkey 13/01/2017

    The launch offering seems particularly paltry and makes me think they might as well have postponed until Q4. Zelda is the game. And you can get that on Wii U.

    To me the presentation was more effective at selling me on the Wii U. Would've already owned one if the pricing wasn't weird and never dropped, instead going up. Now if you want one you'll have to find one used. And those prices will probably also start going up. The Wii U's pricing is so god damned annoying. I'll probably never get one.
    Reply -3
  • VibratingDonkey 13/01/2017

    At least you UK people know the price.

    Apparently retailers in Sweden have been told it will launch March 3rd here as well, but they have not yet been given an MSRP. The Switch supposedly launching here in seven weeks, and Nintendo not knowing the price, is pretty bizarre.

    I assume it'll be the usual conversion rate of add a decimal to whatever the US price is, but who knows.
    Reply 0
  • New year's resolution: Let's stop screaming

  • VibratingDonkey 08/01/2017

    People sometimes conflate angry accusations, insults and threats with criticism. Would indeed be nice if this were to stop happening.

    When there is a legit grievance at the core, there is justification to be some amount of emotional about it. But those emotions should be directed towards the thing, not the people who did the thing. That's where the righteous justification starts diminishing.

    How to stifle the abusive, overly hostile behavior though? Guess you'll have to try to talk to people. I feel like the argument that being shitty to developers provides the opposite of motivation for them to fix the games, and for developers at large to want to keep creating them, ought to be the most compelling overall. I don't know how you would argue against that. Guess it's possible if you're a shitty enough person to reckon fear makes for a good motivator.

    (Remembered one half of Vlambeer wrote a thing related to this.)

    It is not difficult to avoid a No Man's Sky situation as a consumer. Don't pre-order or buy games day one. Don't trust marketing. Wait for more, reliable information. Or be aware of and accept the risk of essentially blindly buying a thing.

    It is difficult to change consumer habits however. People will continue getting angry because they pre-ordered a thing for the foreseeable future. Publishers blatantly and greatly push for things to be this way, and have done so for a long time. They're far from blameless, but ultimately it's our decision to buy games based on their marketing.
    Reply +3
  • Square Enix Twitter recovers followers after hack

  • VibratingDonkey 06/01/2017

    I was disappointed by how boring it was to watch this unfold. Taking over an official account, and not using it for anything fun, dumb, clever, witty or interesting, is just...why even bother? Reply +6
  • Nintendo Switch CPU and GPU clock speeds revealed

  • VibratingDonkey 19/12/2016

    Hope it'll be competitive in regards to price then.

    I don't understand the logic of the GPU still being underclocked when docked. Is it just because they want some semblance of consistency? Seems dumb.
    Reply +1
  • Super Mario Run only playable with an internet connection

  • VibratingDonkey 09/12/2016

    "...we want to make sure that we're able to offer it to them in a way that they're able to play it in a stable environment."

    Well that's blatantly not true at all. Always online games are inherently less stable and reliable, and seems especially bad for a mobile game, where on top of connection issues on Nintendo's end, you'll be dependent on reception in order to play it. It's also especially bad for a game that costs $10, way up there for a mobile game. Paying more, and effectively getting less of a game, is just...bad.
    Reply +9
  • "She can't understand how someone she's never met would be so kind"

  • VibratingDonkey 06/12/2016

    I won both lottery-ish things I entered, the Christmas lights that were semi-broken started working again, that Adult Swim neo-Nazi show got canned, and now people on the internet are being nice. Today was a good day. Thumbs up, Jesus. Reply +1
  • Russian MPs call for FIFA 17 ban over "gay propaganda"

  • VibratingDonkey 06/12/2016

    Hopefully the giant space squids will invade before the beef nukes start flying.
    Reply +6
  • VibratingDonkey 06/12/2016

    Too late, Russia. FIFA's gay propaganda has already turned your children gay. Reply +1
  • Here's your first look at the Crash Bandicoot remaster

  • VibratingDonkey 04/12/2016

    I liked the second one in particular, and this looks like it'll probably be a good remaster of them, but I don't know that I particularly want to play them again? If I did, I think they're on PSN. Remaking/modernizing old games does revitalize to some extent, but I find the concept primarily dull. I'd rather they spend these resources on a new thing that's not restricted by 90's game design and technology.

    Who's making this anyway? I guess various Activision-ish joints have been trying to make something new on numerous occasions, so if it'd be that again, maybe this is for the better still/the only way a new Crash game would exist at all. I don't know.
    Reply 0
  • Huge Hitman update makes unlocks work offline

  • VibratingDonkey 28/11/2016

    Single player progression (i.e. the actual unlocking of unlocks, and the challenge system) are still unavailable offline. So this doesn't solve all the issues we have with the absolute stupid bullshit that is this single player game requiring a constant internet connection.

    Making online unlocks accessible to the offline profile is just a step in the right direction, which means the game is now no longer completely useless whenever the game is unable to contact authentication servers. Which is almost always due to problems on their end.
    Reply +6
  • Burnout Paradise is gaming perfection

  • VibratingDonkey 27/11/2016

    Hey hey you you. I don't like this game as much as others did.
    The whole game just looks real dull, wish it looked closer to the boxart. Felt more like open world mechanics than arcade driving fun to me. It's like the Mirror's Edge Catalyst of Burnout. 2 and 3 were the peak of the series to me.
    Reply 0
  • So, about that Assassin's Creed Ezio Collection glitch video

  • VibratingDonkey 23/11/2016

    It was an error to claim these bugs indicated the remaster was worse than the original. But if you came upon these bugs for the first time in the remaster, who wouldn't make that assumption? Easy mistake to make. Reply +5
  • I'm still searching for the SSX in Steep, but there's one thing it absolutely nails

  • VibratingDonkey 21/11/2016

    The concept of a Horizon Paradise for extreme winter sports is something I'm theoretically on board with. But what I played of the beta feels like it's lacking something. Like it hasn't found the right balance between realism and arcadey goof. It's not extreme enough in either direction.

    The real-time sports change is good, but it makes me wonder how much more good it would be if you could sports change mid-air.

    As someone who's just barely played snowboardish games before, I'd say it feels ok, but not exciting, or much of anything, until you start picking up some proper speed. That, bailing and air tricks is what I think works for this game. And the stupid running in the wingsuit. And failing to deploy it. And the open mountain. And the seamless multiplayer thing.

    The worst thing it's got going is the parasailing. It's just...anti-fun. It's slow and boaty, and hard to grasp how to do well at. I'm just awkwardly drifting around vaguely towards checkpoints that I'll hopefully hit instead of trees or rocks or whatnot. Feel like even if I would eventually learn how to suck less at it, it's still not going to be fun. I kind of don't ever want to do that again?
    Reply +3
  • Let's raise a glass to Ubisoft's other open world game set in San Francisco

  • VibratingDonkey 18/11/2016

    I'm glad Ubisoft did it once, but wish Ubisoft would give Reflections the reigns of another larger budget project. Or more smaller ones. Using the creative talent responsible for this and Grow Up, in support roles for games thought up by others, seems like a waste. Reply +2
  • Sharing Watch Dogs 2 genitalia got someone banned from PSN

  • VibratingDonkey 17/11/2016

    This whole thing is dumb. Unless these were unintended genitals, this shouldn't be Ubisoft's problem, but Sony's and their lack of a content filter, and stupidly harsh punishment for people who quite sensibly assume that it's fine to share imagery from a game on the platform on the platform.

    Another thing I don't get is the implication that genitals are fine unless they cross some sort of line where they become too detailed? Apparently this makes Sony ok with the sharing of images of the dude's dong and the hoola hoop nudist?

    At least this guy eventually got the planned one month suspension lifted after this all blew up.
    Reply 0
  • Tacoma is like Gone Home, in space, with time-travel powers

  • VibratingDonkey 11/11/2016

    Taco Ma is my favorite fast food restaurant chain.
    Reply +1
  • VibratingDonkey 11/11/2016

    Essentially making the narrative the gameplay requires the player to feel like they're actively taking part in it in some manner. That's what makes these kinds of games interesting. Because even if the writing is good, effectively watching cutscenes play out, is not very engaging from a gameplay perspective. So it's good to hear that there's time/story puzzling going on.

    Following Gone Home I have some amount of faith in that these people are capable of designing good narrative games, but I wonder how many pushups Steve Gaynor can do?
    Reply 0
  • Mass Effect Andromeda $199 Collector's Edition includes remote control Mako

  • VibratingDonkey 07/11/2016

    If you want to buy an RC car/display piece and a steelbook for $200, this is the edition for you, I guess. I'm more interested in the edition that comes with the game and is $60.

    The Mako controlled fine as I recall it (might recall wrong.) But it had the dumbest design where you were asked to drive over the bumpiest terrain while shooting things, and the turret couldn't aim downwards.

    Mass Effect has had frequent issues related to resource gathering. But I dunno if that's ever particularly fun in games really. ME3 was fine in that regard. Probing planets isn't the most engaging thing ever, but the ME3 iteration of it was ok.

    Exploring around to find stuffs is a good concept in theory, but it needs to be more than the kind of traipsing around barren areas of ME1, or whatever the hell Dragon Age Origins was. So I hope they've figured that out. I'm tentatively happy about the return of the Mako though.
    Reply +2
  • Now we know exactly when Mass Effect Andromeda is set

  • VibratingDonkey 07/11/2016

    A long time to go, in a galaxy far, far away...Mass Effect 3 might as well not have happened.

    Anyway, this has probably been pointed out a lot before, but this must be intentional, no? Come on, they're even from the same city.
    Reply -1
  • VibratingDonkey 07/11/2016

    The Shepard era being over with means I no longer feel beholden to maintain the DudeShep I made like a fecking decade ago. People kept going on so hard about FemShep, I felt a little bit sad.

    Dunno if Jennifer Hale's still on board or how everything fits into the SAG-AFTRA strike, but after a decade of dude I'm looking forward to FemRy.

    Also looking forward to the Red Dwarf jokes that surely must be present. If there was ever a time for Mass Effect to lean at least a little bit towards Guardians of the Galaxy, this would be it.
    Reply +5
  • Sony PlayStation 4 Pro review

  • VibratingDonkey 07/11/2016

    With all of our content mirrored across onto the new PlayStation, we decided to begin our tests by looking at the presentation and performance of existing PS4 titles. Rather famously, Xbox One S features a GPU overclock compared to the standard model, resulting in a small bump to performance that while not essential, is clearly nice to have. When I spoke to Mark Cerny about improved base PS4 performance on Pro, he ruled it out completely pretty quickly and this is borne out by final hardware.

    The new Pro GPU shuts down half of its compute units and the rest are downclocked from 911MHz to the standard PS4's 800MHz. We used a Project Cars replay running on both systems to judge performance in like-for-like gaming conditions in a title that stresses both CPU and GPU, and saw totally identical results. Maintaining compatibility is Sony's key aim here, though we would have liked to have seen an option to unlock full Pro performance (or at least the additional clocks) on older PS4 games. There is some precedent here: PS2 introduced additional texture filtering for running PS1 titles via backward compatibility - it was an option, and it was signposted that using the feature was done at the user's risk.
    Yeah this is a somewhat significant bummer.

    Performance gains are automatic across the board with PC hardware upgrades. And with the Xbox One S. It not being possible for all games on the PS4 Pro to benefit from that bump, sucks. I honestly don't understand what Sony is worried about. Surely AMD drivers don't suck that hard? And as pointed out in the quote above, Sony could allow users to enable this boost mode by slapping a disclaimer on there saying stability is not guaranteed.

    Hope they'll change their minds about this with a firmware update.
    Reply +7
  • VibratingDonkey 07/11/2016

    @mecha-B Fivehundredandninetynine youess dollars? Reply 0
  • VibratingDonkey 07/11/2016

    When I do get a PS4 it's 94% going to be a Pro, for the reasons mentioned above, but looking at games currently available and games coming up, that'll be somewhere in 2017. Since I've spoiled Until Dawn for myself, Uncharted 4 is pretty much the only PS4 exclusive out there that I'm properly into. Some Tearaway Unfolded and a little bit Driveclub.

    By the end of 2017 there will (certainly, probably and/or hopefully) be Horizon, Days Gone, Gravity Rush 2, God of War, Detroit, Dreams, The Last Guardian, Valkyria, Spider-Man, WiLD and Yakuza 6. And friends. Perhaps also a bundle including one of them.

    I really, really want Yakuza 6. That game looks like the best game ever. It's some kind of miracle that it gets to exist with a budget properly accommodating for its overindulgent brand of nonsense. Thanks Japan. Hope it'll make its way out of there ASAP.
    Reply 0
  • Zoe Quinn's next game is a far cry from Depression Quest

  • VibratingDonkey 30/10/2016

    Haven't seen a burn like that since I rolled over that sausage in Stephen's Sausage Roll.

    If it wasn't clear, I'm fine with suppressing disruptive Gamergate garbage. I would say unless you're on a government operated forum, but libel, threats and harassment isn't protected speech; is about half of Gamergate's speech.

    Wondered how these self-proclaimed free speech supporters would respond to the pro-free speech argument you quoted, within the context of my previous post. Would they stand by their supposed ideology, or would they betray it.

    The outcome isn't terribly surprising.
    Basically, my point is that it's easy to cut through the veil and see where Gamergate's priorities lie. Has been for years. For instance, "Gamergate is about ethics in games journalism!", Gamergate argued and argues, while Zoe Quinn wasn't and isn't a games journalist. Yet to this day Gamergate says and encourages things like:
    The only reason we know her name is because she slept around a lot.
    Miss Quinn's propensity to give out hand-jobs for coverage.
    a Crowd-funding campaign with more than whiff of fraud about it.
    This whole endeavor was kind of pointless though due to the aforementioned blatantness. And you're probably the only one who will read this, assuming you have notifications on. Butt oh well.
    Reply -3
  • VibratingDonkey 28/10/2016

    Downvoting is another issue Eurogamer needs to deal with, as its sole purpose is to suppress and silence speech. Reply -9
  • VibratingDonkey 28/10/2016

    And here's Fallo to prove MrTom right.

    That's just what happens when you attract a gamergate infestation and the registration process is designed to be convenient. Make alt account, or get banned > create new account, rinse and repeat.

    Eurogamer really should just disable comments on articles about certain topics where you can see the shitstorm coming from a mile away. But I don't know if that's a thing they can do with this ancient software.

    In lieu of that, ignoring accounts is proper super effective. I highly recommend it.
    Reply -5
  • VibratingDonkey 27/10/2016

    That hat swivel is honestly a reason why I believe in this game. It's beautiful.

    I haven't read anything Tingle, just seen a couple of covers, but on a surface level I like the goofy sexy rebellion of it. It seems borderline too memey, but I'll give this game a shot why not. At the very least I'll appreciate that this thing is a thing that will exist. More things, good. Especially FMV things. There's just something about FMV.
    Reply -6
  • VibratingDonkey 27/10/2016

    I searched "sexy Goldblum"

    Reply +15
  • Deadly Premonition director Swery65 has the most amazing tattoo

  • VibratingDonkey 28/10/2016

    How can one get angry at an article about Swery, game butts and giant monkey tattoos? I do not understand.

    Also, why not both serious and goofy articles? Don't understand that either.
    Reply +1
  • My Summer Car is the most hardcore driving game yet

  • VibratingDonkey 27/10/2016

    Those people are fine with women making games, as long as they're not perceived to have stepped out of line. By for instance indicating that the aforementioned is a shitty situation.

    Argue against the status quo, sexism, inequality etc. or be a woman working on a game perceived to contain such messages, and the angry nerds may start flocking out of the woodworks.

    Anyway, the message of this game is to always carry a case of beer with you. And that's a message anyone can get behind.
    Reply +5
  • VibratingDonkey 27/10/2016

    Not sure about the current state of this game, but in general for early access games, it's kind of weird that people are ok with paying for buggy, possibly broken games with features and content missing, because they're told they are like that before paying for them.
    "This game's unfinished and busted."

    It's just strange that unfinishedness isn't thought of as an absolute problem. I'll find it annoying if a game crashes regardless of what stage of development it's in. That's not something I can switch off, and I don't understand how some people apparently can.

    I don't have a problem with it, kind of the opposite. Everyone knows what they're buying into, and early access has led to the existence and further development of a lot of games. I just find it strange. Strange but good.

    I've been on board with this game's vision ever since that dev diary, am glad to see it's in public beta and moving towards completion, and I'll be buying it when the journey's done. Hopefully by summer.

    Reply 0
  • Infamous video game movie director Uwe Boll retires from filmmaking

  • VibratingDonkey 27/10/2016

    I won't pretend to know the business realities of lower budget movies as streaming is becoming more popular, but there's probably other factors that led Boll to here.

    It sounds like he realizes that though from how he refers to the streak of garbage video game movies he shoveled out. He made money from them, but they completely assed up his reputation. Something he's evidently been royally frustrated by over the years. I don't think it's unfair that those are what most people know him by, but it's also fair to say that he is capable of doing, and has done, better than that. He suffers a wee bit of hubris though, I think. He's not always that bad, but he's never that good.
    Reply 0
  • Rick and Morty co-creator Dan Harmon is making a show about esports

  • VibratingDonkey 19/10/2016

    Dan Harmon is an executive producer. One of seven. Don't know how involved he is exactly, but I expect not particularly, wouldn't assume more than giving his production company the greenlight to fund this or some such.

    The gaming angle always makes me groan, but maybe the people involved have what it takes to make something funny still. I know that Dan and Arin have good comedic instincts and chemistry, less sure about their acting, but that also may not actually matter too much as I doubt this will be taking itself particularly seriously.

    Tubers should never be in anything aspiring to be taken seriously. They generally aren't actors, except for that one role they play.
    Another planned Youtube Red show, Impulse, is a sci-fi thriller written and produced by Jeff Lieber, co-creator of Lost, that will "feature top YouTubers", which is just an absolutely repelling notion.
    Reply +3
  • Watch Dogs 2 delayed two weeks on PC

  • VibratingDonkey 18/10/2016

    One could suspect this is a reaction to the response Mafia 3 received, but it's just Ubisoft honoring the tradition of pretending their games will be released on PC and console simultaneously.

    As always, don't pre-order.

    Unless the game's 50% off on Origin like this was some weeks ago.
    New games have ridiculous prices on Origin in my region, so it was more like 30% off. Still, those savings are worth the risk I reckon.
    Reply 0
  • Introducing Multibowl!: QWOP creator Bennet Foddy's private game that will never be released

  • VibratingDonkey 17/10/2016

    It's sad that something like this can't exist in a more real way, because it's kind of brilliant.

    I guess you could make it fall off a truck onto the internet, but that would only work if there's nothing identifying. Certainly way beyond risky at this point.
    Reply 0
  • Unionists want Mafia 3 banned for "sick glamorisation of terrorism"

  • VibratingDonkey 13/10/2016

    When you finish all of Burke's missions he reveals that he was actually selling the cars in the US to raise enough money to get his daughter out of the city, and the IRA thing was a cover story so she didn't find out. Not that there's much chance that anyone mentioned in this article has actually played the game of course.
    Oh... And that too, then. Which would render this whole episode not just inaccurate, but actively embarrassing.
    Reply +5
  • VibratingDonkey 13/10/2016

    This doesn't seem like it's glamorizing anything. Burke makes it sound like something they're forcing him to do rather than something he necessarily wants to do. Also Burke's life is the opposite of glamorous. Reply +4
  • Mafia 3 review

  • VibratingDonkey 12/10/2016

    Despite of its flaws, I feel like it is and will continue to be worthwhile as I quite appreciate the setting, atmosphere, music, characters, writing and the sociopolitical topics it touches on. Some six hours in, I still find the mechanics engaging enough to tolerate the repetition. The animations are good, bullets lethal, and Lincoln is pretty spry for a dead guy. It does the thing where you're presented with a hostile area and you do what comes natural with whatever options are provided, which is something I find inherently engaging.

    There's been one serious bug, where a tutorial prompt would fuck up the XB1 controls so it failed to register certain inputs. Had to use mouse and keyboard to get past the section where you're running away from the cops.

    Oh and this fuckery.

    Was driving along until I noticed, where the hell are the poles that are supposed to hold these magically suspended wires? Where the hell is anything? Two minutes later, oh there it is.

    But so far I've been most bothered by the empty chore of collecting fuses. A needlessly drawn out process which, unlike other collectibles, the game basically tells you to continually go through.
    Reply +3
  • Mafia 3's in-game statement on its depiction of racism

  • VibratingDonkey 08/10/2016

    Good lord you're so sensitive. It's just a statement of intent. Context for what the game contains and why. A foreword by the author. A description.

    But nope. Can't handle it.

    Thin-skinned, self-righteous, precious flowers whining about SJWs.

    I can't handle that.
    Reply +2
  • Beyond Good & Evil 2 is almost definitely in development

  • VibratingDonkey 06/10/2016

    Ubisoft is trying its darndest to keep this in the news. Fair enough.

    I'm sad that I can't be happy about this announcement.
    It's announced out of some behind the doors business necessity, not because it's ready to be announced or Ancel and friends necessarily want it to be.

    Thing's in pre-production and won't be out for another X years, and that's if Vivendi doesn't take over and cancel it. And if it avoids stumbling down some development hell hole again.

    I was looking forward to some certainty. That's what's been lacking, not the knowledge that the game's being worked on. That feels like it's been the case on and off, to some extent, for the past eight years. It feels like nothing has changed.

    Oh I've already said some of this. Oh well.
    Reply +3
  • VibratingDonkey 05/10/2016

    This is the worst reveal of a game.

    What this means is another X years of uncertain waiting, as some manner of development hell may continue as Ancel splits his time between this and Wild, and Ubisoft tries to fend off Vivendi by waving BG&E2 around as an example of the creative heart Ubi claims is on the line, which may very well be the case as there's a chance Vivendi would pull the plug on this project if they could, which they might at some point.

    The worst.
    Reply +14
  • Gambling commission is cracking down on Valve over third-party skin gambling sites

  • VibratingDonkey 06/10/2016

    I don't know how legally culpable Valve really is, but it's good to see Valve being pressured and that things are happening.

    Hopefully next year we won't have to worry about Tom Cassell attending EGX, due to him being busy defending himself in court. Until then though, I don't see a problem with continuing to remind people, in relevant comment sections, that EGX/Gamer Network is supporting this scambag.
    Reply +4
  • No Man's Sky subreddit shut down, community erupts

  • VibratingDonkey 05/10/2016

    Yeah. Can't even call a community toxic without someone getting all upset about it.
    Reply +1
  • VibratingDonkey 05/10/2016

    The head moderator of the subreddit is who temporarily shut it down, not Reddit or anyone affiliated with the company.

    Even if that was the case, Reddit is not operated by the state and so has the freedom to do whatever it wants with its privately owned site.

    Death threats and the like is not protected speech anywhere.

    The hell is a delitt?
    Reply +6
  • Battleborn will be free to play soon - report

  • VibratingDonkey 30/09/2016

    Randy Pitchford seems so keen on what he's doing being considered special, even when it's rote. Reply +4
  • What do you actually do in games?

  • VibratingDonkey 30/09/2016

    Reply +2
  • VibratingDonkey 30/09/2016

    I think whether these qualify as games or not should be a pointless discussion as it doesn't change what they are. It's solely about how they're perceived. Whether someone wants to perceive them as games or not wouldn't matter if it wasn't for some wanting to use the declassification of them as games, as a way to dismiss them, make them less legitimate, gatekeep. It's cool to not like these for whatever reason, but that is not. This egocentric, insular attitude that's hostile towards different experiences or ones not targeted towards them, is one in favor of stagnating games and stifling the creative freedom of developers.

    So that's basically why I'd like to refer to them as games.

    The possible reasons for appreciating a game, why you find a game engaging, should encompass as much as possible (up to some manner of moral boundary.)
    Reply +2
  • Michel Ancel is getting Beyond Good & Evil fans excited again

  • VibratingDonkey 29/09/2016

    The visual style is a lot more Blacksad than the cutesy cartoon one of the original.

    Concept art doesn't particularly inspire great confidence in me that this is anywhere close to being done. Ancel posting this would imply they're actively working on it to some extent, which has been the case on and off for almost a decade.

    Besides, Vivendi is just going to take over and cancel it anyway.
    Reply 0