SomaticSense Comments

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  • Bungie insists Destiny remains on track despite composer exit

  • SomaticSense 18/04/2014


    If money was really an issue, then why the nonsensical decision to hire McCartney? No way would he have come cheap as a former Beatle and knight of the realm . And it's debatable what an overated, semi-retired songwriter/boyband member could possibly add to O'Donnell's team, seeing as he has little to zero experience in soundtracking any visual entertainment product of any form, let alone a colossal budget sci-fi/fantasy videogame.

    Sacking O'Donnell over moneyin light of that, would be a ridiculously schizophrenic business decision. If that is what happened, then either Acti or Bungie are in a mess.
    Reply +2
  • Suda 51's Killer is Dead hits PC in May

  • SomaticSense 19/02/2014

    I love Suda's work. Even Lollipop Chainsaw. I've also had a minor obsession with Japanese-style action hack'n'slashers since DMC1. So I'd love this, right?

    No. For a Japano-slasher it got wrong just about every nuance important to the specific genre it's a part of. No enemy attack audio cues, Some truly awful level and boss design (the first dream level in particular was a complete car crash), the combat has no flow, and the controls aren't quite responsive enough for this kind of game. It felt rushed in every aspect. Even the occasionally sublime art style fell apart in places, with some really ugly contrasting. It was also wasn't remotely as entertaining in theme or cutscenes as any of Suda's previous games.

    And there's no way Bayonetta's combat has less depth. Easier to get into definitely, but not less deep. The mere thought of that should be crazy to anyone who has put hours into both.
    Reply 0
  • New Gran Turismo 6 patch introduces more seasonals, increased payout

  • SomaticSense 20/12/2013


    The lack of qualifying is indeed an issue. But recommending Forza over GT because of it is bizarre, as no Forza game (unless) Forza 5 has had a change of tack) has had it either! It has always been my biggest gripe in a series that overwise I love.
    Reply 0
  • Tomb Raider Definitive Edition is more than a facelift, dev insists

  • SomaticSense 18/12/2013

    "It's definitely not just a facelift". What is it then?

    /goes on to describe the exact definition of a videogame facelift.

    And as for the whole new audience thing to justify the stunning 50 quid price tag. Honestly? If they wanted to play it so much, they go and buy it RIGHT NOW on current gen for around £10-20. And if they didn't want to pay full whack on PS3/360/PC launch, then why would they suddenly do it now? For hair physics? No.

    Square Enix seem to not have a clue. And good luck on meeting those ludicrous sales targets this time with such an insanely stupid business plan.
    Reply +9
  • Don't expect a new Project Gotham Racing game any time soon

  • SomaticSense 01/11/2013

    No room for for a third racing franchise, which is both gameplaywise and thematically different to any of the others? But you have room for a million identikit FPS games? Not cool MS.

    The racing genre, with the decline it's been in saleswise over the last few years, desperately needs a PGR refresh to give it a shot in the arm. Criterion's handling of the NFS franchise has been a great boon, but we need something else, that isn't car combat and isn't a sim. We need PGR.

    And Forza Horizon, while a great game, was not the answer. And on current evidence, neither is Drive Club.
    Reply +3
  • F1 2013 review

  • SomaticSense 03/10/2013

    @eviroboy Yeah, don't bother reading any reviews at all and just buy the game blind. Great idea! Maybe Gearbox would have sold a few more copies of Colonial Marines if more people adopted that strategy.

    An ability to form your own opinion, now only £39.99!
    Reply +4
  • Xbox 360 update that kills Microsoft Points now available

  • SomaticSense 27/08/2013

    @fushimi Because it is more expensive now. They've slyly bumped up the prices a small amount on everything.

    For example, 800 points items used to be £6.80 (iirc), now since the change they seem to be priced at £6.99.

    Still, much cheaper than PSN, but a bit cheeky nonetheless.
    Reply +1
  • Farming Simulator is coming to PS3 and Xbox 360, and this is the trailer

  • SomaticSense 05/07/2013

    I love 'em, but the Yogscast have lot to answer for. Having a ton of laughs watching others playing a hilariously terrible game is one thing, buying it and playing it yourself is another.

    Should devs really be financially rewarded for being shit, when other, stellar devs, are forced to shut down due to lack of sales?
    Reply -10
  • How Hotline Miami is like BDSM

  • SomaticSense 01/07/2013


    - It's only £6.49.

    - There's still at least 5 months until the PS4's release, and your PS3 isn't going to spontaeneously combust on launch day.

    - And the game is only a few hours long, so you'll be done with it even if your PS3 does explode the moment the first PS4 is sold.

    There. Just buy it if you want it!
    Reply +2
  • SomaticSense 01/07/2013


    The ridiculous waffle in this article! Some of the claims are a stretch to say the least.

    I love Hotline Miami too. But Christ. It's fantastically fun game, which controls beautifully, and has awesome music. Nothing more.

    What next? A philosophical debate on how Serious Sam speaks about humanity's nature to consume and destroy all around it while not heeding the lessons of history past? How about Smash TV's social comment on why a bacon double cheeseburger tastes so amazing?
    Reply +2
  • Désilets: the future is digital, Microsoft just fluffed Xbox One message

  • SomaticSense 01/07/2013

    @ubergine Exactly.

    I keep hearing the term 'entitled' used to beat disgruntled consumers with.

    The ones that I see that are acting like entitled spoilt brats, are the companies, like Ubi, who seem to occasionally forget that appealing to the consumers is how they make their money. In a capitalist society, you are trying to encourage a trading agreement with someone's hard-earned. They don't owe your company by default.
    Reply +5
  • SomaticSense 01/07/2013

    @Acrid 100% agree.

    The bloke comes across as a massive arse.
    Reply +4
  • SomaticSense 01/07/2013

    Again, an important industry figurehead completely misses the point.

    People weren't whining about an exclusively digital future (Full price X1 games were all going to be released on disc, remember. So even pre-180 it wasn't a digi-only platform anyway, at least initially). Everyone with an ounce of common sense would have known for at least the last 10 years that was where we are heading, so was not the problem people had with MS's muddled announcments. In fact, although I may be wrong, I can't remember MS even mentioning an eventual death of physical media.

    No. People's complaints were based on the DRM based removal of basic consumer rights (or draconian enforcement of already existing 'rental agreements', should you have read the EULAof any game from the last few years) that we have been entitled to for millenia.

    Once again, a big company suggests contempt for the people who work hard for the privelege of giving them money.
    Reply +8
  • Open-world Mirror's Edge isn't a shooter, but it's "very different" compared to the original, EA says

  • SomaticSense 13/06/2013

    Is this similar to the "changes for the better" that Fuse (neé Overstrike) was subjected to? Reply +1
  • In Theory: Can the Xbox One cloud transform next-gen gaming?

  • SomaticSense 28/05/2013

    My immediate thought gameplaywise when first hearing about the 'cloud processor' idea was this:

    Shoot soldier.

    Wait ten seconds.

    Cue ragdoll physics effect of soldier being shot
    How exactly is cloud processing better than just having a hardware processor?
    Reply +11
  • Microsoft patents awarding achievements for watching TV

  • SomaticSense 27/05/2013

    Everyone should watch Charlie Brooker's Black Mirror.

    The man is a prophet.
    Reply +1
  • Microsoft won't let indies self-publish on Xbox One

  • SomaticSense 22/05/2013


    So their strategy seems to be: suck off the publishers, piss off the devs.

    How the fuck will that work?
    Reply +22
  • Aliens: Colonial Marines managed 1.31 million sales

  • SomaticSense 12/05/2013

    @metroid455 I hate to see people made redundant (been there...), but Timegate still made the pile of crap, AND the misleading E3 footage. And Sega pushed for the review embargos.

    No one in this sorry mess should be absolved of blame. They are all guilty. So please quit with the ' Timegate was an innocent victim' angle.
    Reply +1
  • SomaticSense 12/05/2013

    @Yautja_Warrior That was one of the major problems: the fucking retconning of the films.

    Keep Hicks dead!
    Reply 0
  • "It was just there: dolphin, dolphin, dolphin"

  • SomaticSense 06/05/2013

    So this is the man responsible for the City of Forever level?

    Hate is a word not strong enough...
    Reply 0
  • Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon review

  • SomaticSense 01/05/2013

    @ShiroBen Wished they'd played it straight? They did.

    It's called Far Cry 3.
    Reply +2
  • Ropey Duke Nukem Forever turned into a Duke Nukem 3D mod

  • SomaticSense 01/05/2013

    @Sicho Between the shit attempt at 'ironic' sexism, the shit controls, shit level design, shit graphics, shit loading times, shit and poorly thought out game mechanics (health regen and 2 gun inventory system), the shit way the game threw endless turret sections at you, and the shit jokes, I seriously think the critical and commercial panning was not because of the inclusion of a few tits.

    There was not one single redeeming feature about the game, so I'd be curious to find out the quality standards of anyone who genuinely found DNF good. Because I suspect those standards are pretty low.
    Reply +2
  • What happens when Spark, Team Ninja and Keiji Inafune collide?

  • SomaticSense 26/04/2013

    @DurzoBlint I think the majority of those who actually played those games would disagree. Reply 0
  • SomaticSense 24/04/2013

    @DurzoBlint You mean except Lords of Shadow, Dead Rising 2, and DMC of course... Reply 0
  • SomaticSense 24/04/2013

    Jesus. What hell has Spark done to get so many reputable Japanese devs interested in them?

    I've nothing against them as people, but how can the devs of Legendary and Turning Point get all this attention, when other devs of some amazing games are getting shut down worldwide?

    WTF is going on?
    Reply 0
  • Is this XBLA's worst game?

  • SomaticSense 24/04/2013

    @Uncompetative Odyssey 3011 is an amazingly well-developed and faithful recreation of one of the greatest games of all time: Elite.

    It is in fact widely regarded as one of the BEST XBL Indie games. So the fact you feel it's appropriate to bring up in this comments thread is both insulting and massively damning of your taste in games.
    Reply +3
  • Nintendo apologises about lack of Monster Hunter 3 Ultimate stock

  • SomaticSense 19/04/2013

    I swear they do this on purpose. They did the same thing with Xenoblade, and rubbed their grubby hands with glee when demand skyrocketed as a result.

    It is a canny retail strategy and not a fuck up. They have done this too many times for it to not be intentional.
    Reply +1
  • The War Z producer says fans would be outraged if they couldn't lose micro-transaction items

  • SomaticSense 29/03/2013

    @Murton So why don't they release the game once it's in a fit and playable state, and not charge people solid cash for a husk of an unfinished game based on promises of what it 'may' be like in a few months time. Why didn't they just release it in few months time then once the promises can be realised?

    There's no debate needed on the issue.
    Reply +3
  • Crytek-authorised TimeSplitters Rewind in development for PC

  • SomaticSense 15/03/2013

    Considering where the success lied for the original trilogy, this really should wind up on consoles too or it'll be a travesty. Reply +7
  • Wii U external hard drive required to download Lego City Undercover, Nintendo says

  • SomaticSense 15/03/2013

    For any WiiU owners moaning about not being able to d/l this, you had plenty of warning regarding the pitiful and impractical HDD size before throwing your money down for the console.

    anyone even half-knowledgeable called this months ago.
    Reply +29
  • Maxis looking into fixing SimCity traffic problems as complaints grow about pathfinding

  • SomaticSense 13/03/2013

    So the issue is that the traffic is taking the shortest route no matter how unsuited that road is?

    I'm staggered at the realism frankly. That is exactly how the traffic works in every city I've ever been to. Especially here in Leicester.
    Reply +7
  • Several staffers on Aliens: Colonial Marines spill the beans on what went wrong - report

  • SomaticSense 26/02/2013

    @Steve2911 So you missed the bit where Gearbox had redo a lot of Timegates work, as their PS3 port didn't actually work.

    The only victims here were those who went out and bought this piece of turd. Not Timegate, not Gearbox, and not Sega.

    They all played their part in this mess.
    Reply +2
  • Capcom: "there is a possibility" of Resident Evil series reboot

  • SomaticSense 01/02/2013

    @.Wolfie-kun. You'd think NT were a hack dev house alongside Tango Gameworks or Spark, who only ever churn out shit the way some of you have been talking.

    Regardless of your opinion on DmC's creative direction, which you are fully entitled to and which I sympathise with, if you really believe it's a genuinely bad game then perhaps it's time for you to find a new hobby.
    Reply +2
  • closing retail business in March

  • SomaticSense 10/01/2013

    No sympathy from me due to a consistently abysmal record of service whenever I've used them.

    Also, blaming the government for the loss of jobs via the dropping of the stupid VAT loophole stinks. As people have already said, there were plenty of companies trading on these shores which still made a healthy profit while price-beating WITH added VAT charges, and with better service too. They have proven you can run a legit law abiding VAT charging online retail business without sacking thousands of staff.

    Good luck competing with ebay...
    Reply +2
  • Amazon replacing missing Nintendo Land games with download codes

  • SomaticSense 04/12/2012

    A lot of people are missing the point here, which is Amazon are flouting their responsiblities by not like-for-like replacing a missing item without the customer having to ring up and complain.

    You shouldn't have to ring up. They should be replacing the disc straight up. The very fact the 'default' option is the download code is the issue here.
    Reply +1
  • Ex-LucasArts source: claim that Star Wars: Battlefront 3 was 99 per cent complete is "just bulls***"

  • SomaticSense 04/12/2012

    Those who have suggested that we only know about 1% of the real story and that there was a lot more going on behind the scenes are exactly right.

    Based on the two solid statements we've had so far; either Lucasarts canned a very near complete game which was guaranteed to rake in millions despite the quality of the end product, or Lucasarts were concerned by the poor quality of Haze and decided to eventually shift development to Spark Unlimited, who made such 'steller' games as Legendary and Turning Point (neither of which don't deserve to lick the boot of even a game like Haze. They were properly abysmal).

    Neither statement makes any sense at all, so there it is definitely an intense and lengthy story of truth that we aren't being told.
    Reply +2
  • Bethesda struggling with Dawnguard on PS3: "This is not a problem we're positive we can solve"

  • SomaticSense 31/08/2012

    To be honest PS3 Skyrim owners aren't missing a whole lot.

    It's without doubt the most shoddily designed DLC Bethesda has ever put out. Overpriced by double it's worth content-wise as well.
    Reply +6
  • Dark Souls: Prepare to Die Edition gets a new Gamescom trailer

  • SomaticSense 15/08/2012

    One of the greatest games ever made. Anyone who initially missed the boat but are planning on getting this will be in for a treat. Ignoring the difficulty (which is usually the first thing everyone mentions), it's masterfully designed and fantastic to play.

    And don't be put off by the difficulty either, I'm genuinely shit at games and yet I finished both NG and NG+. The difficulty is there not to frustate, but to teach you how to play and to use patience and method, which is something that every other developer can learn from. I imagine that's easier said than done though.

    Some of my best gaming memories of this generation, and probably of all time, when I look back in the years to come will have come from this one game. It reminds me a lot of the effect Super Metroid had on me back in the day.
    Reply +11
  • Mass Effect 3 Extended Cut adds fourth ending

  • SomaticSense 27/06/2012

    @Ironic_War_Criminal "
    Imagine if this amount of nerd bitching was directed at Christopher Nolan for the Inception ending. He'd tell them to go fuck themselves.

    The difference is, the Inception ending wasn't bullshit, full of massive in your face neon coloured plot holes, and wasn't counter to the narrative themes that have been pressed hard into our faces for the previous 100 hours of the series as a whole.

    The Inception ending forced the audience to think and left a lot open. That was a good thing. ME3 tried to do the same, but failed miserably due to a sudden narrative incompetence.
    Reply +5
  • Author drops Assassin's Creed copyright lawsuit

  • SomaticSense 30/05/2012

    @LLJaf BUt that would then be Ubi's fault, not his.

    If Ubi did breach copyright, then he had a right to file a lawsuit. If it means your favourite game gets delayed, then tough shit. Blame Ubi for that.
    Reply +2
  • Microsoft to phase out Microsoft Points by end of the year - report

  • SomaticSense 24/01/2012

    @Ferral "Good idea, only downside will be if they decide to say charge $25 for something on the American store then go charging £25 on the UK store for example. So we could end up paying more for the same thing."

    They do this anyway as it stands now.

    Set up a US account, and you'll see it costs less for them to buy, say 1000 points, than it does for us to buy them based on the current exchange rate. Then if you look at the US Video Marketplace, a lot of films cost less MS Points to rent/buy in the US than over here.

    This means they are shafting us in two ways. The points cost more over here, and sometimes you need more points to buy stuff. I set up a US account for to get access to some demos earlier, and I was appalled to find that out, as the difference in the cost of buying Points can be attributed to the exchange rate and cost of living. But after that the points should be the same worldwide.

    It not all the time, but quite often the Points system covers up exactly how much more they are charging some regions compared to others. At least with an actual monetary system the differences in costs will be more transparent.
    Reply +2
  • Skyrim debuts at four on Japan chart

  • SomaticSense 14/12/2011

    Considering the level of competition regarding the three entries above it, that's quite impressive.

    If it wasn't for those big hitters this would've been number one, which surely marks a huge turnaround in fortunes for the Western RPG in Japan.
    Reply 0
  • Fallout: New Vegas dev hopes digital distribution "stabs used game market in the heart"

  • SomaticSense 13/12/2011

    Is there another industry, anywhere, that so wantonly disregards it's relative second-hand industry?

    The way the way devs keep going on about it, you'd think games are the only products anywhere in the world which you can buy second hand.

    QUIT FUCKING WHINING! No used game industry = less disposable income = less new game sales.
    Reply +2
  • Kojima explains Metal Gear Rising switch to Platinum

  • SomaticSense 12/12/2011

    Platinum on development duties? I'm now actually interested in this game!

    Shit title though. "Revengeance"? Really? It's almost as bad as the two year old which came up RR: Unboundededed.
    Reply 0
  • Crytek's Ryse now a next-gen release - report

  • SomaticSense 09/12/2011

    Have MS sent out dev kits for the new Xbox then? How else could they be developing this as a next-gen title?

    Reply -1
  • Skyrim update 1.3 available now on Steam

  • SomaticSense 08/12/2011


    Of course they always surface eventually. You know, the "you're all a bunch of liars because I've not had any glitches or bugs".

    In other news, I've never had a car accident. So all those figures released by the government are clearly wrong.
    Reply 0
  • OnLive would "love" to talk with MS and Sony about getting its tech into the next Xbox and PS4

  • SomaticSense 08/12/2011

    Doesn't Onlive exist for those who don't have the hardware to match the games?

    In that case, why would MS or Sony want it on their next-gen console? What exactly would be the point when for the same money consumers could either have a solid holdable retail copy or d/l straight to their HDD without any worry about lag or connections issues?

    Most pointless and laughable idea I've heard all year.
    Reply +13
  • Ultimate Marvel vs Capcom 3 DLC schedule

  • SomaticSense 18/11/2011

    I mourn the days when you used to get extensive extra stuff on the disc.

    Oh, and what was that excuse again for the existence of UMvC3? The tsunami you say? That was the reason why the extra characters and the rebalancing wasn't DLC for the original, yeah?

    Forget the fact that excuse made no sense at all, we have DLC now for this 'budget' release. So Capcom can now offically fuck off with the utterly crass exploitation of the deaths of thousands as apparent just cause for ripping off millions.
    Reply +3
  • Texture problems hit Xbox 360 Skyrim

  • SomaticSense 14/11/2011

    I'm sorry, Bethesda's reasoning over it being the deleting of the cache by playing other games is utter twaddle. How many people since getting this game over the last fews days have been playing other games?

    I hope that genuinely isn't what they think is the cause, as when the patch arrives it'll surely end up doing fuck all. They'll end up patching nothing.
    Reply 0
  • Angry Birds boxed for PC, costs £10

  • SomaticSense 10/11/2011


    If I wanted to be raped, I'd walk the streets of my estate at 2am on a Saturday morning dressed in a short skirt and a blonde wig, tyvm.
    Reply +16