MoFo Comments

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  • Minecraft, architecture and the trouble with children

  • MoFo 15/09/2014

    I kinda did the opposite to one of my daughter's homes in minecraft. A lovely tree house she'd built spread across multiple trees but I figured you'd need to keep warm at night in it right? So I added a fireplace. And then just for added effect wouldn't my daughter be so chuffed with me if the fireplace actually worked? See where this is going?

    She wasn't really gone all that long but it's amazing how quickly the fire spread and I don't think there was anything in the tree house that wasn't made of wood.
    Reply +2
  • Steam and Early Access: To curate or not curate?

  • MoFo 06/08/2014

    I think Steam needs a smarter method to allow you to discover the kind of games you like. I like strategy games but that doesn't mean I want to wade through every game that's classified as strategy. Let me narrow it down (WWII, Sci-fi, etc) Then let me filter out games with a user review less than <70%. Then let me filter out games I've already searched for and previously dismissed. Then allow me to prioritise games with those of people that have similar tastes to me. Then let me search for keywords. Then let me look specifically for turn-based games. OH and games that are rated high graphically as well prioritising games that people have downloaded and played for more than five minutes.

    There's a wealth of potential search options that'd help me get to the kind of games I'd like to play but instead all I get is to search a broad category and wade through page after page of titles.

    Not to mention that when I open a game's page and then return to the category page, it takes me back to the first page of results so I have to wade through all the pages again to get to where I had previously browsed to. WTF!
    Reply +5
  • Yogventures studio reveals troubled development, how Yogscast "lost faith" early on

  • MoFo 21/07/2014

    Wait, who in their right mind agrees to pay someone $35k up front? Why would anyone do that? Why would anyone even think this was a good idea in the first place? There's such a thing called a "salary". It's pretty common and tends to work really well. Guess this guy never heard of that term before and opted for the less commonly used, "give someone loads of money with no strings attached" approach. Reply +9
  • Peculiar Skullgirls message confuses, catches those who pirate the game

  • MoFo 10/07/2014

    Some people wish to counter this by saying, "Yeah but sometimes I will pirate a game just to trial it and I'll buy it if it's good."

    I used to say that too. Then I realised I'd finished quite a few pirated games and NEVER bought them. I was just saying it to convince myself that what I was doing was justified and that it was the dev's fault for not making a demo or that I'd been burned too many times before by games I'd paid for that turned out to be crap.

    The reality: I just didn't want to pay for them.

    It's all good now though, cos: Steam!!!
    Reply +12
  • EA responds to fan outcry over The Sims 4 missing features

  • MoFo 08/07/2014


    With you on that. I've not bought an EA or Ubisoft game in over five years. Between DLC, "always online" and insanely crippling anti-piracy measures, I just can't be bothered. Besides, I find Indie games always offer fresher more original gaming anyway.
    Reply +3
  • MoFo 08/07/2014

    Hilarious. I can't decide if they genuinely think we're fooled by this nonsense knowing full well this'll be a DLC purchase, or if they've just entered a new phase of uber-trolling us and they just don't give a shit.

    "Hey guys, ah yeah we found that getting Sims to eat in-game was just way beyond the technical capabilities of modern technology, so we...uh....just dropped that aspect from the game. So all ya Sims are gonna drop dead after a couple of days. Nah the game won't suck because of this....well at least for the first 10 minutes of gameplay."


    "Oh hey guys, we're happy to announce the all new "I'm hungry" food eating DLC out NOW! Did we say that wasn't possible? Really? I've no idea what you're talking about. Now where's your MONEY? GIMME GIMME GIMME!!"
    Reply +8
  • How No Man's Sky stole the show at E3

  • MoFo 26/06/2014


    I believe what he's saying is Minecraft wasn't "designed" for the ~Youtube generation, it was just a game that happened to be picked up by Youtubers. Whilst this game is being intentionaly designed with Youtube in mind.
    Reply 0
  • MSI Nightblade review

  • MoFo 22/06/2014

    I would love a small form factor PC but I hate the fact that the design always has to look testosterone injected. I'm a guy but that doesn't mean I want something that looks like a school boy's hard-on inducing vision of the future. Just give me a subtle device that I can discretely tuck away somewhere please.

    Any case recommendations that'd fit that billing are greatly appreciated.
    Reply +19
  • Editor's blog: I am sexist

  • MoFo 20/06/2014


    You say, "However it's incredibly frustrating to see men flip their shit about some really, really basic feminist critique that's neither radical nor aggressive .... If you can't deal with this tame stuff, how would you react if you read some radical feminism that's not calling for toning it down, but for a complete dismantling and rebuilding of society?"

    I don't see many people here flipping their shit here but rather questioning whether Tom's points equate to sexism at all. Should we just accept what Tom says? IF someone claims my actions are sexist should I just say, "yes you're right. My bad."

    From the tone of Tom's article I come away with the feeling that he is going to spend the rest of his days questioning every one of his actions....should I step on to the zebra crossing now or wait until a car drives up with a male driver in case I'm considered sexist for causing a female driver to stop for me? I won't join that queue in the checkout because if I'm standing behind a woman she might fill ill at ease with me behind her.

    Yes these examples are sexist in themselves but that's exactly how this article comes across to me.

    If men need to pussy foot around every thought and process going through our minds to rid ourselves of any potential sexist actions, isn't that sexist against women? Sounds to me like we'd be assuming women are so incapable of being able to deal with the slightest non-equal thought that we have to change everything we do in order to protect them. Because what....they're too weak a species to handle it?

    That is what this article boils down to to me. Tom thinks women are too weak to handle differences between men and women so he's decided to change his ways in order to protect them.

    Poor weak women.

    P.S. I have a daughter. She's strong minded, strong willed and is going to be a force to be reckoned with when she's older. Do I feel I need to analyse the smallest details in the world for fear that it may negatively depict women and so be unfair on my daugther? Nope. I'm confident she'll be able to handle things just fine.

    Oh and yes of course we need to ensure men and women have equal opportunities where appropriate. I'm not arguing against that. But I do hope my daughter will grow up in a sane world where we're all able to freely express our creativity and continue to create games that'll appeal to just men or just women or a mixture of both.
    Reply +15
  • MoFo 19/06/2014

    Any female perspectives here? Should we ban this hog-tie scenarios? Or ensure you can hog-tie a man or a women? Even if it's based on replicating a famous movie scene, should we ignore that aspect? Reply 0
  • Assassin's Creed Unity is a backward step for progressive games

  • MoFo 12/06/2014

    "rather than doing the astonishingly obvious thing they should do instead, which is fix it."

    Yeah sure, let's just fix it up. Should only take a few minutes to pop some female avatars back in the game. Piece of cake right? I mean hell Tom, it's probably just as simple a fix as switching the bMakeSexistGame bool back to FALSE?

    Seriously someone with your experience in gaming should know these things aren't easy, even if they are "astonishingly obvious"

    My God, this is the first time in my life I've taken the side of Ubisoft. Someone crucify me please.
    Reply +4
  • Destiny time-lapse: world in motion

  • MoFo 11/06/2014

    Also, adding to the cloud comments, in the shot from 2:38 there's ground level mist(?) drifting across the city in opposite directions. Surely something like that must be simple to get right. Reply 0
  • Forget E3 press conferences, sometimes Cliffhorse is all you need

  • MoFo 10/06/2014

    I've nothing to say.

    And yet I just did.

    Reply +3
  • FIFA World Cup game reckons Germany will win the World Cup

  • MoFo 05/06/2014


    Sorry what was that? Too busy watching the 1966 reruns.

    Edit: for the record I lived in Scotland for 10 years. Love the Scots but by god do they have a chip on their shoulder over 1966.
    Reply 0
  • MoFo 05/06/2014


    Nah, England will win having scored 1966 goals. The players will do 1966 laps of honour around the stadium. They'll then fly to Scotland and spend the next 1966 years rubbing in the Scot's faces.

    Oh and not forgetting the Yes vote will lose by 1966 votes and Scotland will then submit to having every house on every street renumbered to 1966, starting with yours!!!

    Oh and the commentators in the world cup will mention the 1966 world cup 1966 times. I think we can both agree on that.
    Reply -2
  • Ultra Street Fighter 4 review

  • MoFo 03/06/2014


    I don't really like Street Fighter.

    Edit: Ha ha bring the downvotes! I'm trolling you fools!
    Reply -31
  • How Firaxis is building its Civilization: Beyond Earth

  • MoFo 20/05/2014

    Having played the civ franchise to death, whenever I try and start a new game and look at that settler and warriors waiting there for my orders, I just feel utterly deflated and unenthusiastic. I think I'm just worn out with the whole mechanics of the game. Sadly I get the feeling this new game isn't really going to stray too far from the tried and tested mechanics of old. Sure, a few new bells and whistles; the odd tweak here and there and some fancy new terms for what essentially amounts to the same underlying system.

    Maybe I just feel jaded. I just wish some other developer would present us with an alternative civilization like game with an entirely fresh approach.
    Reply +1
  • Google eyes $1bn YouTube buy-out of Twitch

  • MoFo 19/05/2014

    I don't even know what Twitch is. Sounds like you just watch gaming videos or something? Am I missing something? I prefer to play games personally. Reply -1
  • The fall of Towns

  • MoFo 09/05/2014

    They needed a good accountant if a $2 mill revenue translated to "there wasn't enough to live off". Reply +17
  • Watch Dogs season pass includes new playable character

  • MoFo 09/04/2014

    Wow I remember when you could buy a full game for that price. Ooo....sorry I would go on but the nurse needs to change my nappy again. Reply +3
  • MSI GT70 2PE Dominator Pro with GTX 880M review

  • MoFo 06/04/2014

    It's great to see this kind of achievement but

    1) It's excruciatingly expensive
    2) It weighs a ton and is huge. I often wonder why bother buying a "laptop" over a desktop when it's so impractical to lug about. I can't imagine someone whipping this out at the airport to play some BF4 while they wait for their plane.
    3) I know I'm a whore to looks and I make no apologies but this thing looks particularly f'ugly.
    4) Play a game with this on your lap and not only will you cut off the blood circulation in your legs but you'll get third degree burns in the process.

    Still in a year we'll see cooler/smaller/better looking laptops with this kind of power and for a much lower price tag.
    Reply +31
  • Get Even gets virtual reality

  • MoFo 03/04/2014

    What's this Occulus Rift thing? I hear it's some Facebook add-on device that'll suck your soul and bleed your brain of all your thoughts? Reply 0
  • Chris Roberts: Star Citizen won't sell to a bigger company

  • MoFo 01/04/2014

    Sorry everyone. I've just sold out to Mr Patel's newsagent down the road. From now on all my comments will be interrupted by ***BUY YOUR LOCAL PAPER FROM PATEL'S NEWSAGENT. A PACKET OF ROLOS IS ONLY 50P MORE THAN YOUR LOCAL SUPERMARKET. SUPPORT YOUR LOCAL STORE AND NOT THE BIG BRAND SUPERMARKET CHAINS TODAY*** Reply 0
  • In pictures: the Watch Dogs floor

  • MoFo 07/03/2014


    From passed experience, Ubisoft thrive on analysing gameplay elements to death. What I often found was that if a certain design feature couldn't be found to fit in with the rest of the game or if it wasn't easy enough to understand for the dumbest of the dumb, they'd can it. That might sound sensible but the problem was how they came to that conclusion. It was all too analytical. They'd end up drawing ridiculous charts, stating such-and-such design element doesn't fit in so-and-so's box. So many charts. So many weird analytical approaches. No one would ever stand up and say, "But hey, that really kinda sounds like it'd be fun in the game."

    You end up with a design document that looks beautiful and when you read it, it sounds so logical and right. It's just there's no soul in it. Is a box the perfect shape for a house because it maximises all the available space? Maybe. But would you live in it?
    Reply +7
  • Naughty Dog bosses deny Uncharted director Amy Hennig was "forced out"

  • MoFo 07/03/2014

    Maybe she was forced out. Maybe they were responsible. Maybe she was crap at her job and deserved it. Maybe it was a giant underhand coup d'etat. Maybe 'maybe' means we haven't a clue. Reply +3
  • This is what Tropico 5 looks like

  • MoFo 06/03/2014

    Since Tropcio 3, I've not really felt the newer ones bring enough novelty and fresh gameplay to the table for me to enjoy it again. Played T3 to death though.

    Bringing in different time periods may help but if that's all they've done, I doubt I'll be picking it up.
    Reply +3
  • Banished review

  • MoFo 28/02/2014

    I've been following this game for the last year and was really looking forward to its release.

    Having now bought it and played it for a week, I'd have to say I mostly agree with the reviewer, although I'd probably give it a score starting at 9/10 and dropping to 7/10 over the next couple of weeks of play.

    It was nice to have a city building game in this style and I've enjoyed beating the challenge that is simply surviving. Yet once you've figured out how to maintain and slowly grow a city, there isn't really any more to it.

    Some kind of goal would be nice. "Build a boat to get away from this shit hole."

    Or some campaign set in America where you're slowly expanding your civilization westward, where each map presented a different challenge.

    There is the prospect of mods, tools for which are in development, so if you're not sure about this game now, I'd say check back in a few months to see if mods have diversified the game.
    Reply +5
  • GameStop selling Xbox One Titanfall bundle for £370

  • MoFo 25/02/2014

    I was briefly interested in getting an X1 after seeing Project Spark. Making your own games within a game and using Kinect to record your own animations for characters in your game. Sounded ace. Then I got in on the beta. Then I saw that Project Spark is all about micro transactions. Then I lost interest in X1 again. Reply +12
  • CandySwipe dev: King "taking the food out of my family's mouth"

  • MoFo 13/02/2014

    I just downloaded the full version purely so I could leave bad feedback for King, then uninstalled. Not sure how else to express my support for the original creator but it's the best I could think of doing. Reply +7
  • Watch Oculus Rift let people virtually swap bodies, genders

  • MoFo 23/01/2014

    Erm...this would make live video streaming porn amazing. I'll put a fiver on this being a thing within a few years. Reply +2
  • Eye-catching city-building strategy game Banished out next month

  • MoFo 10/01/2014

    If it's half as good as I hope then I'll be happy. Been waiting for something like this since my ancestors were but mere dinosaur embryos. Reply +5
  • Wintry survival sim Midwinter is getting a remake in 2015

  • MoFo 09/01/2014

    Oh wow. I always assumed I was the only person that ever heard of this game. No one I ever spoke to about it knew what I was blathering on about. I wonder if they'll retain the whole concept of jumping between characters and replaying the same two hour time period over and over from different perspectives. It was obviously a bit of a clumsy time-travel paradox but fun nonetheless. Reply 0
  • Eurogamer's Game of the Year 2013

  • MoFo 30/12/2013

    Congrats Mario.

    Personally though, I wish someone would cement his legs in concrete and chuck him in to the sea just over the Mariana trench. Mario and his pals just grate every nerve in my body. Oh those high-pitched squeaky excitable voices. Vomit.

    Now if they made a video game where Mario goes bankrupt, develops an alcohol problem, then goes on a crazed shooting frenzy, taking out all his old that's a Mario game I could enjoy. Or I could just play GTA or Max Payne I guess.

    Still, congrats Mario.

    P.S. Nearly forgot to add the obligatory:

    God, Eurogamer have really gone down in my estimation. How could they possibly vote this GOTY. I swear I'll never come back to Eurogamer ever again. etc.

    P.P.S Please do carry on down-voting me if you feel the need, but just so you know, this post is what is deemed "A joke". So for those not getting it, chill out guys, I'm not really going to kill Mario.
    Reply -19
  • Care for a next-gen medieval RPG with no fantasy?

  • MoFo 19/12/2013

    @Paul_cz Agree. Whenever I see a medieval game my thought process normally goes along the lines of:

    Thought 1: YES! Medieval game. Love it! Can't wait.

    Thought 2: (Reads more of preview) Oh it has magic. So it's just another fantasy game then. Sigh.

    Thought 3: Maybe I'll dig out my old Mount & Blade copy and give that another bash.

    Thought 4: (30 mins later) God this looks dated. Why won't someone make a modern medieval game?
    Reply +3
  • MoFo 19/12/2013

    Or show the shot of the chap on the hill first, then pan back out to show the carnage around him. Reply +1
  • MoFo 19/12/2013

    Gameplay trailer looks promising.

    The teaser trailer made me want to skewer myself and lie across an open fire until I'm nicely roasted. Way too over the top on the musical front. Overbearing with the big beating drums, trumpets and what not for a simple shot of a chap on a horse on a hill. If, on the other hand, we were witnessing a shot of a ferocious battle in full swing, or two armies charging towards each other with the footage ending just as they clash, now that would've been more epic in my opinion.
    Reply 0
  • The Chinese Room on its PS4-exclusive Everybody's Gone to the Rapture

  • MoFo 10/12/2013

    2 minute video. 25 seconds of actual "footage". The PR dogs have been let loose on this one. Reply -5
  • Hello Games debuts first-person action adventure No Man's Sky

  • MoFo 09/12/2013

    Wait what the...? Where did this come from? I've been dreaming of this kind of game for years. Fingers crossed it lives up to a even a morsel of my hopes. Reply +2
  • Retina iPad mini review

  • MoFo 04/12/2013

    I don't take issue with people saying, "I don't see a need for a laptop as I can do everything I need on my tablet". This is simply one person's opinion and it's perfectly true and valid for that individual.

    The issue I have is people who say, "Nobody needs laptops any more. Anyone who does still have a laptop only has one because they don't own a tablet and as soon as they get a tablet they'll see the error of their ways." Whilst this is still technically an opinion it's also someone stating something as a universal fact. It doesn't make it true and it makes someone look like they have a self-centred and limited view of the world.

    A lot of people have laptops and are perfectly happy with them. A lot of people have tablets and are perfectly happy with them. I can't personally see a situation where either one can totally trump the other, so long as either one has any kind of advantage over the other.
    Reply +1
  • MoFo 04/12/2013


    Thanks. Someone with common sense. I have a tablet and a laptop. I rarely use my tablet at home. The laptop screen is bigger/nicer. It's faster/more powerful. The resolution is better. I can't do programming on my tablet. Even something simple like sending an email is easier/faster on a laptop. I find I'll get cramp using a tablet for an extended duration. The variety and depth of PC games are far better than anything you'll get on a tablet.

    Seriously, some people can't see beyond their own restrictive view of the world. Laptops aren't dead in the water, so long as there's a need to do anything faster,easier,better...etc.
    Reply +1
  • Now watch Sony's expensive-looking PS4 ad

  • MoFo 14/11/2013


    (I'm not a XBONE fanboy. That's just how I feel)
    Reply -8
  • Xbox One Snap lets you play video games and watch TV at the same time

  • MoFo 12/11/2013

    Not a big fan of all these XBone gimmicks but I can see this being useful if, like me, you enjoy watching football for the goals but the in between ball-bouncing-about stuff you find dull. So now I can play my games and any time I hear the commentator getting excited I can whip over to the footy.

    Alas the BBC doesn't really have any live footy and I'll never pay for Sky Sports, so ultimately it's not a feature I'll go for.
    Reply +3
  • 12 minute video shows us what it's like to use Xbox One

  • MoFo 08/11/2013

    I was watching this thinking it's kinda neat. But then I realised I'm not bothered by or don't like:
    1) Talking to my computer
    2) Having my dad Skyping me whilst I'm in the middle of something
    3) having a TV option that isn't even available in my country
    4) knowing what my friends are up to or them knowing what I'm up to
    5) recording footage from the game's I'm playing.

    I do, however, like the fact that I can pause a game and restart it instantly.

    What I do wish the Xbox could do:
    1) order me pizza
    2) order me hookers
    3) order me drugs

    Guess I'll hold out until the next next gen.
    Reply +39
  • Eurogamer's Games of the Generation: The top 50

  • MoFo 04/11/2013

    Not convinced by that number one spot. Only played it for a couple of hours and just had no enthusiasm to carry on. Surely the number one game should be so epic that it appeals to almost everyone.

    But hey, I don't really care ultimately.
    Reply +1
  • Ex-Valve engineers explain the CastAR's benefits over its competition

  • MoFo 31/10/2013

    So could I, in theory, loop a bunch of this reflective material around my head in order to create a 360 degree FOV? Say at 50cm distance around my head?

    I've tried Rift but sadly I suffer badly from dizziness and queeziness, but if I could do the above I reckon I'd be able to handle that.
    Reply +2
  • UK chart: Pokémon, Beyond fail to dislodge GTA 5

  • MoFo 14/10/2013


    "this is wrong everywhere I went people were buying the new pokemon games"

    Yo U totes right. I waz at a sex party last nite an all da boyz their wanted woz da bitch Pokemom game, insted of da pussy.

    Then I woz in da bushes in da park an all dem kiddies wanted from the ice cream man was pokemom again.

    Reply -6
  • Is the most disturbing scene in GTA 5 justified?

  • MoFo 17/09/2013

    This just in: It's shocking that this game can let you torture people.

    Now back to the game...where was I? Oh yes I was running down and murdering innocent civilians without repercussion, killing animals, killing hundreds of gang members (they're people too you know), etc etc.

    Seriously, if you're going to start wearing this moralistic hat then surely GTA as a whole must sicken you?

    Let's not forget, murder and torture have been in movies for years. Do we come out of a movie saying, "This is disgusting! How can they justify showing that in a movie?"

    I've recently read on several sources that Eurogamer and this Tom chap have a bit of a thing against Rockstar since GTA IV. I sincerely hope that's not the case as it'd be a sad day for independent and unbiased reporting, which I've always held Eurogamer in high regard for.

    Either that or maybe Tom's a dad now(?) and his morals have shifted. As an older gamer and father myself, I know things I previously enjoyed no longer appeal. But disapproving of torture? Don't care in the least, because I don't see any underlying evil in its inclusion in the game. If I did, I'd be the first to subscribe to the Daily Mail.
    Reply -2
  • Grand Theft Auto 5 achievements leak

  • MoFo 19/08/2013

    @CaptainKid No you're not. I just don't get people's obsessions with achievements. I buy a game to enjoy the game for what it is. I couldn't care less for whatever achievement pops up. Now if achievements meant you got discounts on future games or had some other real-life benefit then I might feel differently. But as things are I pity all the people commenting on here getting so het up about it. It's like getting these achievements means more to them than enjoying the game. Reply +1
  • Zynga lost $15.8 million in the last three months

  • MoFo 26/07/2013

    Dear Zynga, looks like parents have figured out how to stop their kids from throwing away limitless amounts of cash on mobile apps. Here are some other ideas you could use that would fit your business model:

    1) Give away mobile phones to residents of old people's homes. Then every 10 minutes the phone will ring showing a caller ID of, "Son" or "Grandson". As soon as the phone is answered you'll connect them to a premium rate number.

    2) Create an app, "Keep my kids safe". Claim that the app will track your kids and inform the parent if anything out-of-ordinary has happened to them. Then repeatedly trigger an alarm on the parent's phone saying, "There's a pedophile in your neighborhood and we're having trouble locating you son. He might be getting molested as we speak. upgrade to the premium version now for £599/month which has a more powerful detection range and we'll be able to pinpoint where your son is."

    3) Start a dating site. Money for old rope.
    Reply +9
  • Steam introduces virtual trading card system

  • MoFo 24/06/2013

    I never got aboard the achievements bandwagon. This one looks pretty similar to the last one. I'll stick to my plodding donkey that just enjoys games and couldn't give a monkeys about all this reward nonsense. Reply +1