Kami Comments

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  • How I ruined Sega's financial results

  • Kami 14/10/2017

    I invented a game called Chinese Takeaway Lottery, where everyone picks a couple of numbers at random, and you have to eat whatever those numbers correspond to on the menu.
    I thought my mates invented that in the mid-90s! It's a fun game. Well, unless you happen to randomly order something eye-wateringly spicy. Or didn't for weeks intently study the menus in question so you could pull off a bunch of numbers for an order you know you can handle.

    I also sometimes miss arcades.

    In short, I miss the mid-90's for some reason.
    Reply +11
  • Shadow of War players are using tricks and cheats to combat loot boxes

  • Kami 13/10/2017

    Sorry Monolith and WB Interactive, but the camels back bears one too many straws and we're flipping you the bird.

    I'm not even surprised about the Denuvo thing. I suspect that plenty of crackers probably teamed up to break it as fast as possible. Just as another middle finger.

    I do hope they see all these erect middle fingers. It's a wonderful sight.
    Reply +3
  • Dead Rising 4 update will bring back original, proper Frank West

  • Kami 09/10/2017

    @moosegrinder - Indeed, I remember my first dalliances with Capcom back in the late 80's with Duck Tales and Ghouls n' Ghosts. They've been with me for the vast bulk of my gaming life.

    Seeing modern Capcom is like seeing a person you thought was awesome thirty years later all washed up and wrinkled and probably with seriously botched plastic surgery. You've known them... so how the hell did it escape your attention that they were self-destructing?

    Not that I'm one to talk on those matters but still... as I said, Dead Rising 4 was mediocre. A few costumes isn't really going to fix it.
    Reply +1
  • Kami 09/10/2017

    @moosegrinder - To be fair though, a dog poo with candy sprinkles does not a dessert make.

    Capcom can dress it up and throw in additional extras, but when the game underneath is so woefully bloody average at best - the term for that is, "Throwing good money after bad", and I'd say it's why Capcom is reportedly once again in the financial shitter.

    It's not like Capcom couldn't use the money they've spent trying to salvage some of their more recent games to... and I'm just spitballing here... make a game people are in genuine danger of giving a toss about.

    ... like Dino Crisis, maybe...
    Reply +1
  • Arms is getting a tie-in graphic novel

  • Kami 05/10/2017

    @Plumbus - I think the official line from in-game is that their arms change due to super-hero masks or some such nonsense. Reply +1
  • In Pokémon Ultra Sun and Moon you can go through a wormhole

  • Kami 05/10/2017

    @carrotcake - Indeed, this rinsing of the 3DS in its sunset is starting to get annoying. They're re-releasing Harvest Moon: Tale of Two Towns (with a + at the end of the new one)... but it's not DLC. Those like me who have the original ToTT on the 3DS seem to have no option to "update" our original version.

    Not liking this angle at all...
    Reply 0
  • Splatoon 2's next Splatfest asks if the toilet paper flap should hang at the front or back

  • Kami 03/10/2017

    I'm so glad to see others who insist on the loo roll dispensing from the front! Reply +1
  • Street Fighter 5 Arcade Edition spotted

  • Kami 20/09/2017

    @Samael_Blackwing - In fairness I'd love to see that happen. Not that I'd buy it (again) or anything but just the sheer balls to try and pull that kind of stunt would be glorious to behold. Reply +3
  • PlayStation TGS 2017 conference live report

  • Kami 19/09/2017

    "Please pre-order, you will pre-order won't you, YOU'RE GOING TO PRE-ORDER OR YOUR DOG GETS IT!" Reply 0
  • Kami 19/09/2017

    pre-order bonuses? Uuuuuuuuuuurgggggggh.... Reply 0
  • Kami 19/09/2017

    okay, that puffball-necked bat is bloody ADORABLE! Reply 0
  • Kami 19/09/2017

    Monster Hunter World Reply 0
  • Kami 19/09/2017

    Wow, all these Vita games Martin. I sure hope no-one is playing that drinking game... Reply 0
  • Kami 19/09/2017

    It's just missing shoulder pads and a big royal wedding doomed to disaster. Reply 0
  • Kami 19/09/2017

    That's some serious 80's clothing and hair! Reply 0
  • Kami 19/09/2017

    And here's that new Fist of the North Star game Reply 0
  • Kami 19/09/2017

    ZOne of the Enders?! Reply 0
  • Kami 19/09/2017

    Also, if you were playing that drinking game, the idolM@aster thing means you can now get liver toxicity. Congratulations! Reply 0
  • Kami 19/09/2017

    will we ever get a new Go My Way or Relations? Not... not that I know anything about this game or anything or god forbid any of the songs... hahaha... hah... ahem. Reply 0
  • Kami 19/09/2017

    idolM@aster! Reply 0
  • Kami 19/09/2017

    Doesn't look like a new Dream Daddy... Reply 0
  • Kami 19/09/2017

    ... fuck I realised I still remember the lyrics to Melodies of Life. Reply 0
  • Kami 19/09/2017

    Forever and beyond... Reply 0
  • Kami 19/09/2017

    I still Reply 0
  • Kami 19/09/2017

    The really sad part is every year I hope for a new Vagrant Story... Reply 0
  • Kami 19/09/2017

    Shadow of the Colossus? Reply 0
  • Kami 19/09/2017

    this is that new Dissidia, is it not? Reply 0
  • Kami 19/09/2017

    Red Dead 2 Reply 0
  • Kami 19/09/2017

    And new colours of PS4's as well Reply 0
  • Kami 19/09/2017

    Seriously Square-Enix, stop pushing Lightning. It's over. FFXIII is over. Let. It. Die. Reply 0
  • Kami 19/09/2017

    Is COD that big in Japan? Reply 0
  • Kami 19/09/2017

    This is just how Japan is though, I remember the hyped Nintendo Switch reveal back in January. Everyone was so damn polite. "No, please finish, we'll save any applause for the end..." Reply 0
  • Kami 19/09/2017

    Urrgh... should have stayed in bed... need coffee... Reply 0
  • Kami 18/09/2017

    I know that's like saying chocolate pudding or strawberry blancmange but I'm just curious which people would prefer... Reply 0
  • Kami 18/09/2017

    The question is then... Demon's Souls 2 or Bloodborne 2? Reply 0
  • Kami 18/09/2017

    Woo oh wait I'm 12 hours early, crap. Reply +2
  • PlayStation 4 and Xbox One cross-platform play switched on in Fortnite, players report

  • Kami 18/09/2017

    Well, that "configuration issue" pretty much opened up a can of worms Sony is gonna find very hard to get back in the tin. That no-one really noticed on their end suggests any impact on PSN is negligible to non-existent, which more or less really screws with any claims of trying to "protect" users their end.

    I still maintain this should be a thing third-parties decide for themselves. If they're paying for the servers, they should get to decide how players end up playing together.
    Reply +8
  • Kami 18/09/2017

    @SYS64738 - I bet you're one of those people who last week was all, "Why would anyone play Doom on the Switch, it'll only be 720p!"

    ... but hey, you pause your game when you need to take a dump. Meanwhile, I'll be at the hospital, waiting for an MRI, and ripping demon heads off whilst I wait for my turn to be put in the magnetic tube.

    And as a sort of "by the by", the PS4 runs at 1080/30, and the Pro and OneX are both going to run at 4K/30 - that's going by what Epic themselves have said. You know, since we both clearly have an appreciation for numbers I thought you might like a little help clarifying yours...

    (edit; as for cross-play, I think it should be a third-party choice. Leave it to manufacturers to decide and the market leader will pretty much always say no - so what's the point relying on them? If you pay for your own servers, should be your choice in the end...)
    Reply +16
  • Jelly Deals: Super Mario Odyssey available to pre-order for Ł37

  • Kami 15/09/2017

    I can only say that when I saw Beach Mario, my first thought was, "Martin is going to be so delighted that Mario has nipples..."

    ...

    I have a problem.
    Reply +1
  • Doom on Switch won't have SnapMap level editor

  • Kami 15/09/2017

    @vert1go - to be fair, that didn't read off as an official statement (id Software wouldn't dare). And as such I think I read that bit as dryly sarcastic.

    However, technically, I must say Switch is going to be interesting on this front. Resi Revelations hid a multitude of sins on that small screen on 3DS; when they blew it up for the console versions, it was... well... *whispers* a bit rough. A bit simplistic. You sort of could tell it was an upscaled 3DS port done on the cheap and quick. Heck, I spotted dozens of graphical glitches in the Wii U and PS3 versions that I couldn't ever have spotted on the 3DS. Because you know. Screen size.

    Switch has to straddle both lines; sure, you can hide much of these things on the handheld. But docked? No-where to hide now! Which means engines have to scale up and down at a whim with as little loss of quality and detail as is possible to achieve.

    I'd certainly like to see the differences between docked and undocked with Doom as a result...

    *edited for typos*
    Reply +1
  • Kami 15/09/2017

    @DoctorOak - It is also the case as I recall that they had this exact same issue with storage space and the like back when Capcom dropped a little thing called Resident Evil: Revelations. And that was pretty damned early in the 3DS' lifespan.

    Storage solutions for portables always seem to work themselves out in the end - but early on, there's always a bit of give and take as developers often accustomed to throwing all their shit at the wall suddenly realise that shrinking stuff down to portable means adhering to the boundaries and limitations of said portable hardware.

    ... never ever changes, the same dance over and over again. How short a memory people seem to have these days...
    Reply +1
  • Doom and Wolfenstein 2: The New Colossus are coming to Switch

  • Kami 14/09/2017

    @rykars - That's where you're wrong. It's only the companion if it is treated as the companion. This isn't a natural thing that is built in. Potential for a console is only ever truly realised when people treat it differently; with care, passion and respect.

    It's where the Wii U failed in real-terms. Compromise without a valid trade-off is bad. If your hardware is still a bit lacking, then you have to have something about your machine that makes it worth the extra effort.

    The Switch... it's a hybrid. On mobile hardware. What you lose on resolution, you gain in the portability. That may be a big trade-off to some people. To others, it may be a more than valid exchange.

    Point is, options. And if the Switch can handle said ports... hey, it's another option. And I'm all for options. It's like people forgot in one strange and distant past, we actually had to look at three versions of a game (edit; which often didn't look that wildly different in the first place) and work out which one was best for us...
    Reply +4
  • Kami 14/09/2017

    @FuzzyDucky - the Direct said multiplayer would be in the Switch version. Reply +5
  • Kami 14/09/2017

    I didn't ever think the Switch would get a big new Triple-A port. I thought it'd always be treated as that companion console; a thing we do fun stuff with, but nothing serious.

    The New Colossus just dropped trousers and did a big steaming dump over that. And they did it so... casually. It's like, no wait a moment Nintendo, stop. Please, hold on, that is kind of a big thing you're just tossing out there!

    I get the impression that all bets are off the table for 2018.
    Reply +6
  • Shadow of War developer who died of cancer immortalised as an in-game orc slayer

  • Kami 02/09/2017

    What strikes me about this whole debacle is how valuable an asset long-term Forthog Orc-Slayer could have been (could still be, in fact). He's interesting. And kind of cool. Spin-offs, story content, backstory, novels, comic books, figurines, posters and so on and so on. Long-term, at any rate, Forthog Orc-Slayer could be an incredible and quite beloved entry into the "movie-canon", a tribute to a beloved father, husband, colleague and friend which grows into a real, true slice of immortality - becoming a valued and storied part of the very universe he loved and worked so hard to bring to life.

    ... but if WB Interactive don't really try to douse this little firestorm, they will devalue the whole thing and disrespect the likeness and goodwill of many people on many sides of the fences.

    Please don't do that, WB Interactive. Because Michael Forgey - and Forthog Orc-Slayer - both deserve so very, very much better than to be teabagged by your short-sighted business acumen...
    Reply +2
  • The developer of Dead Rising is making a mobile Puzzle Fighter

  • Kami 02/09/2017

    @DerekTrousers - first picture, I see a diamond wiping out all gems of a single colour.

    I apologise for pointing that out.
    Reply 0
  • Kami 31/08/2017

    Well, I foresee a new Pocket Fighter in the future.

    (I also see they're still trying to push RE5 Jill... the new art style might grow on me but that version of Ms. Valentine still annoys me for some reason...)
    Reply +2
  • Blizzard gamescom 2017 show live report

  • Kami 23/08/2017

    Aww, but at least Snowball is okay. Phew. Wouldn't have been able to do anything otherwise. Reply 0
  • Kami 23/08/2017

    I'm now a Snowball fan. Reply 0
  • Kami 23/08/2017

    Yay Snowball is okay! Reply 0