ExplodingClown Comments

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  • The modern day Thief reboot that never was

  • ExplodingClown 01/09/2015


    Granted, though we're none of us as young as we were :) An older Garrett voiced by Russell could have been good as a cameo character to guide and advise the younger player protagonist (that Squenix obviously insisted on for Thief 2014 as a misguided appeal to da kidz), but his story was completed in Deadly Shadows when he takes on the mentor role for the street child like the one he once was, and by implication embodies a new beginning for the Keepers after the destruction of the old order, and the completion of the Pagan-Hammerite-Keeper trinity of schism, chaos and renewal.

    It's fun to theorise :)
    Reply 0
  • ExplodingClown 31/08/2015


    I think I'd probably have bothered with Thief-reboot if they hadn't, well, framed it as a reboot. Steven Russell *is* Garrett, so losing him as a voice actor was a big red flag - all they had to do was come up with a new character who simply WASN'T Garrett, and they'd have encountered much less fanbase hostility. The City is practically a character itself, with such an obscure and twisted history and structure, complex social relations and factions, so they already had a rich setting to work with, but from what I read it was just used as a cosmetic backdrop for nothing much of interest. :(
    Reply 0
  • ExplodingClown 31/08/2015

    The Dark Mod is the closest you can get to the original Thief games. As much as another Thief game would have been welcome, this modern day setting with Garrett in a hoodie does sound like a bad misstep, and with publisher interference pushing the shooter aspect, I think this would have been a big letdown. Dishonored has made up for it in spades.

    Say what one will about Deadly Shadows - rarely is the complaint about 'consolification' justified, but in that case the soul of Thief was pretty damaged by those tiny pocket-sized areas jammed into what a console of that generation could handle. The plot worked fine though, it closed Garrett's story circle very nicely, and the hag was genuinely more unpleasant than most of the boo-scare gore-heavy enemies in many supposed horror games. Plus: Shalebridge Cradle.
    Reply +11
  • Borderlands movie in the works

  • ExplodingClown 28/08/2015

    we'll make the movie with the same in-your-face attitude that has made the series a blockbuster mega-franchise
    Toes curled.
    Reply +5
  • Proteus dev reveals Russian fairytale adventure Forest of Sleep

  • ExplodingClown 27/08/2015

    I love the aesthetic, and the basic idea sounds intriguing. Hell, I'll buy it just for the bear with the balalaika. Reply +2
  • Angry Birds developer Rovio to lay off 260 staff

  • ExplodingClown 26/08/2015

    Angry Staff. Reply 0
  • Funcom unveils The Park, a single-player horror set in an abandoned theme park

  • ExplodingClown 26/08/2015

    The art and sound in Age of Conan were beautiful, and the landscapes interesting and full of potential. It was such a shame they made it an MMO, it would have been a fantastic single player RPG. Never played Secret World, but the concept sounded great - again, the MMO thing just put up a big 'no' flag. Hope this helps them financially. Reply +3
  • Our first look at Batman: Arkham Knight's 1989 Batmobile in action

  • ExplodingClown 14/08/2015

    Fuck me, the presenter of that video was like human tinnitus. Also too old for the schtick, coming across like a creepy neckbeard Timmy Mallett. Reply 0
  • Grip, the spiritual successor to Rollcage, takes to Kickstarter

  • ExplodingClown 12/08/2015

    I miss Extreme-G... :cry: Reply 0
  • Pixels: the Eurogamer review

  • ExplodingClown 10/08/2015


    U mad, bro?


    A part of me died when I saw they'd used all that expensive CGI to... make Q*bert piss.
    Reply 0
  • The Soulful machinery of Armored Core

  • ExplodingClown 09/08/2015


    Agreed. Kuon and Echo Night Beyond are nothing like the Souls games, and excellent in their own right (as well as being creepy as fuck).
    Reply +1
  • ExplodingClown 09/08/2015


    "The mech game I really want is a new, singleplayer focused Mechwarrior-style game. Slower, more tactical and with a real sense of weight to it".

    Absurdly-100% agree. Only likely to pop up on kickstarter though
    Also agree. And coupled with a VR headset to really give you the sense you're sitting in a massive machine, it's a no-brainer.

    If only Hawken had a single-player campaign.... :(
    Reply +4
  • Yager has lost Dead Island 2, but it still has Dreadnought

  • ExplodingClown 07/08/2015

    Wesley, they've also mentioned a story-driven single player campaign. As one of the Yager team posted on the forum,

    It will be episodic - you already knew that.

    There will definitely be lore and a story. We don't hire our talented writers (Dan Abnett among them) just to hang out with them =D

    In the first interviews we often talk about Sid Meier's Pirates as a strong source of inspiration. Maybe some of you know this game. It's a bit older - but good none the less, worth to check it out!
    Maybe that hint will excite your imagination a bit ;)

    Unfortunately there is not much more we can share with you - yet. One day, in a not so far future, you'll get all the details.
    But it is not this day.
    Any info on that?
    Reply +3
  • Fallout 4 won't have a level cap

  • ExplodingClown 07/08/2015


    'Most people'

    Hard to believe bearing in mind its loyal following. I found it made me replay the game, giving more careful thought to what I did, and added a real sense of growing anxiety: everything that cost me time was a moral choice balancing possible loot against the lives of my friends in Vault 13, and in a more organic way than the forced 'crisis moments' in something like Mass Effect (which I still enjoyed, even if it was hokey and vaguely fascistic).

    If you can't fail, where's the drama in the story? It all just becomes pandering to the adolescent messiah complex, like the worst of BioWare's output.
    Reply +2
  • ExplodingClown 06/08/2015

    It'd be nice if at some point, an RPG would contain both New Game +, and genuinely time-critical plotlines. That way you wouldn't get the old "We must act now or all will be lost! But we'll just hang around until you've finished farting about turning in those quests and looking in obscure corners of the map" syndrome. You'd have to balance gaining a few more XP with something going seriously bad. Much as I love Witcher 3, there's still that 'we'll hold off on the epic confrontation til you've won a few horse races and found that last blueprint' feel from time to time. Reply -1
  • Motörhead is getting its own Victor Vran expansion

  • ExplodingClown 06/08/2015

    Is venereal disease going to be a buff or a debuff?

    Hawkwind DLC or gtfo.
    Reply +5
  • Submerged review

  • ExplodingClown 06/08/2015

    Ah well. Just hope this doesn't discourage other developers from using this kind of setting. The world needs a game of J.G.Ballard's 'The Drowned World'. Reply +9
  • In Mafia 3 you play a Vietnam veteran in 1968 New Orleans

  • ExplodingClown 05/08/2015


    Oh mother, tell your children
    Not to do as I have done
    Don't put in a preorder
    Don't buy it on day one.
    Reply +5
  • Ex-BioWare devs launch Kickstarter for action-RPG Mooncrest

  • ExplodingClown 05/08/2015

    Everything about the game sounds painfully derivative. Even the concept art painting seems to have nicked the bridge from Shadow Of The Colossus.

    That KS video felt like the world's most embarrassing porn setup.
    Reply +9
  • Mafia 3 reveal set for Gamescom

  • ExplodingClown 28/07/2015

    If it's the 1970's, fantastic. If they keep a serious tone, even better. Mafia 2 was ruined by trying to be GTA 1950 - the stupid dialogue from the pedestrians that was obviously supposed to be funny, the shitty 'humorous' radio announcer (why not just use archive radio news broadcasts for fuck's sake?) and the idiocies like Jimmy going 'yeahhh' when he skidded his car, plus the abrupt stop to the plot, made it half the game Mafia was. Shame, because the gameworld was beautiful. Reply +2
  • The Witcher 3 is getting a New Game Plus mode

  • ExplodingClown 28/07/2015

    100+ hours, best ending, didn't play Gwent more than once, and Roach's "special" behaviour made the horse races too frustrating to do more than a couple. But what an achievement by CDPR. That being said, I revisited Assassins of Kings and found the control scheme, inventory and crafting to be horrible - that 'medallion sonar pulse' thing was definitely best gotten rid of.

    Wild Hunt will be the last Witcher game with Geralt for sure. If they return to the Witcher world, it'd probably be somewhere other than the Northern Kingdoms, and with a different hero. The lore continuity problems would otherwise be overwhelming.

    Unless they go prequel, of course.
    Reply 0
  • An hour with Randy Pitchford

  • ExplodingClown 24/07/2015

    It's a great shame Steam hadn't introduced their refunds policy before A:CM was released. Then you'd have seen it get the crucifixion it deserved.

    Pitchford says he loves 'Aliens', but he comes across as the kind of person who claims to love 'Fight Club', but fastforwards through the dialogue because he doesn't understand the bits where people aren't hitting each other.

    Anyone who wasn't repelled by Duke Nukem Forever should be put on the Sex Offenders Register as a precaution.
    Reply -2
  • Former BioWare devs preparing new RPG Mooncrest for Kickstarter

  • ExplodingClown 24/07/2015

    Sounds painfully familiar.

    There's been a LOT of heroic fantasy games made since the LOTR movies proved there was big money in fantasy, and after the epic of Witcher 3 maybe the genre just needs time to breathe. Even the Souls games are risking overfamiliarity - Bloodborne would be a far more welcome source of inspiration to cite. Can't we have a few more decent sci-fi/steampunk RPGs?
    Reply 0
  • Dishonored: Definitive Edition is half-off if you own the original

  • ExplodingClown 23/07/2015

    I do hope they release this as a HD texture patch for the PC. Playing through again, it's still a thing of exquisite beauty but some of the textures like the notices and posters could really do with sharpening up. Can't get enough of the Dishonored world, it takes so many disparate elements that shouldn't work and through some miracle brings them together seamlessly and convincingly.

    Also, Dishonored 2 looks like it's paying pretty strong homage to Thief 2: The Metal Age. And that is a very, very good thing. If they announce Steven Russell is voicing a character, I may well wet myself with excitement.
    Reply 0
  • Dead Island 2 is no longer being made by Yager

  • ExplodingClown 15/07/2015

    Yager are currently working on Dreadnought. Which looks really pretty damn impressive.... Reply +2
  • Video: Games with awful product tie-ins

  • ExplodingClown 02/07/2015

    To be fair Johnny, you still look like a 12 year old, just one with a stick-on beard.

    In-game real ads are probably worse than cross-promotions (except in stuff like FIFA of course). Nothing ruins escapism like product placement :(
    Reply +3
  • To the Batmobile? The trouble with Arkham Knight's biggest addition

  • ExplodingClown 02/07/2015

    It seems like Rocksteady anticipated this reaction. If you take the time to listen to the assorted thugs across the city chatting to each other (before you swoop down and knock out their teeth), there's an exchange about the Batmobile where one talks about the previous (Arkham Asylum) one and how he prefers the classic, sports car look. I can't remember the exact words, but anyone playing is bound to hear them sooner or later.

    In fairness I'd love to have the beautiful Arkham Asylum batmobile (described perfectly in this article: a mixture of Keaton and Animated batmobiles) as at least an option - maybe as endgame content, to drive around the city when it's completely unlocked and no more tank fights - but I can see why they went down the direction they did.

    As far as the rear aspect goes, it does still reference the Asylum batmobile's tail quite heavily. If you unlocked the character trophy for it in Asylum, take a look. Yes the rounded 'passenger pod' lacks the racy feel, but function trumps form this time.

    Personally I'm more irked that they made Catwoman look like Bjork. Where's the black eyeshadow?
    Reply +1
  • Battlezone 1998 is getting remastered for PC

  • ExplodingClown 30/06/2015


    We're going to have to disagree on this one. Anyway, won't be buying this as far too many promising new games to get through in the near future - Dreadnought, for example. Nostalgia just clogs the pipes. Also, I lost faith with Rebellion after their horrible Aliens Vs Predator remake from a couple of years ago (we won't mention Rogue Warrior either).
    Reply -5
  • ExplodingClown 30/06/2015

    Battlezone (1998) was a cracking game, let down by an overly-serious tone. It would have been a solid gold classic had its approach veered more towards parody - say, a little more like Iron Brigade or Dr. Strangelove, maybe with R. Lee Ermey doing his stuff, instead of a po-faced generic gravelly voice trying to inject angst into a game about Cold War hovertanks on the moon. But then the 90s also gave us Nu-Metal and Mullet Superman, so Battlezone's failings pale in comparison. Reply -6
  • Batman: Arkham Knight PC fixes are "significant" and "will take some time"

  • ExplodingClown 30/06/2015

    If this isn't a bomb, nothing is.

    (still, I did just pick up the Season Pass for £10, so there's a silver lining somewhere...)
    Reply 0
  • Video: Arkham Knight, Mass Effect Andromeda and a mystery thing - The Eurogamer Show

  • ExplodingClown 28/06/2015

    Not sure where to mention this, but as there's an Arkham Knight section in this vid: it looks like a Steam patch has put the originally-missing-yet-seen-in-the-NVidia-trailer rainy surfaces into the PC version. Damage control at its most urgent.... Reply 0
  • Rise of the Tomb Raider brings back Lara's sense of adventure

  • ExplodingClown 27/06/2015


    Not sure you quite grasp the nature of differential power bases. But hey, I bet your online dating profile's a blast :)
    Reply +4
  • ExplodingClown 26/06/2015

    Does it still have the vomit-inducing camera? When nu-Lara ran in the 2013 game it felt like she was being followed around by a drunk film crew with Parkinsons Disease.

    Hell yes, more character desperately needed. More incipient psychosis, the kind that prompts near-suicidal risk taking and guilt-free homicide/wolficide/bearicide.

    And ideally a new voice actress. A mildly depressed porn actress could have given a more involving dialogue reading than Camilla Luddington, voice of the reboot.

    Oh yes, and 'Rise of...' should be banned from game and film titles for at least 5 years. Rise of the Godslayer, Rise of the Lich King, Rise of Nations, rise rise rise etc. Pretty much the only game that could get away with using 'Rise of' in its title would be a prequel to I Am Bread.
    Reply +1
  • Tale of Tales is sunsetting its studio following Sunset

  • ExplodingClown 24/06/2015

    a grizzly coming-of-age parable
    Do you by any chance mean 'grisly'? Because there weren't any bears in The Path that I recall.

    Literacy lies bleeding.
    Reply +2
  • Devolver Digital brings Norse mythology to PS4 and PC in Eitr

  • ExplodingClown 20/06/2015


    Fair points all. I'm ancient enough to have started with a 'TV Sports' console - (Tennis! Squash! Football! All in glorious monochrome!) so I'm no stranger to pixel art, which for me reached its heights on the Amiga. I can appreciate it's now just one more option in the artist's palette when going for a desired look and feel: it's just often unclear whether the choice *is* aesthetic, or just some kind of LOL OLD STUFF/SO QUIRKY decision someone pulled out of their arse :-/
    Reply 0
  • ExplodingClown 19/06/2015

    I can see Ginryu's point while holding exactly no opinion on its validity. If you're old enough to remember when pixel art was the bleeding edge of graphics technology, and then you watched the medium's evolution up to the billion-polycount visuals of today, you tend to start seeing pixel art when used by a new game as a kind of deliberately obtuse affectation (much as when you see some 20something in a Hoxton cafe typing on an old ribbon-and-arms typewriter). The little of the game on display here doesn't really allow for a balanced judgment, though that small screenshot does look uncomfortably muddy and indistinct. Reply 0
  • Zeno Clash dev announces The Deadly Tower of Monsters

  • ExplodingClown 13/06/2015

    ACE Team always manage to come out with something refreshing and unique. Sold. Reply 0
  • Ready at Dawn doesn't own The Order but would "love" to be a part of its future

  • ExplodingClown 08/06/2015

    A lot of talk about "the future" for a game that has none. Reply -15
  • We Happy Few launches on Kickstarter

  • ExplodingClown 05/06/2015

    Bioshock meets No One Lives Forever? Sold. Reply 0
  • Far Cry, Deus Ex devs unite for racing FPS Bios

  • ExplodingClown 04/06/2015

    For all the frenetic pace, this looks massively dull. Is it specifically going to be marketed to those with ADHD? Reply 0
  • Hatred review

  • ExplodingClown 04/06/2015

    So basically it's the Katie Hopkins of gaming. Desperately spewing bile in an attempt to court controversy and seek attention, but just meriting weary shrugs.

    Though at least you can uninstall Hatred.

    Edit: thinking about it, the most disturbingly violent game I've ever played is still Soldier of Fortune 2. Seeing enemies with bloody shards of glass sticking out of their flesh because they were the other side of a window when a grenade went off nearby, or watching them vomit when shot in the stomach, or hearing their horrified howls of agony as they waved the stump of an arm that had just been abruptly amputated with a shotgun blast, managed to make even my more angrily sadistic younger self feel a twinge of disquiet. That game is now 13 years old....
    Reply +2
  • XCOM 2 announced for PC this November

  • ExplodingClown 01/06/2015

    What? No 'Terror From The Deep'? :(

    The feeling I get from this is very Half-Life 2. I'm guessing the new alien administration is much like the Combine, all outward-benevolence-hiding-sinister-motives and that the destruction of the enemy mothership in Xcom 1 somehow allowed an even worse extraterrestrial threat to waltz in and set up shop. That being said, it'd be a nice twist if for once the alien overlords turned out to be genuinely benevolent, and the human resistance were just a load of bigoted pricks.

    Think I might buy Satellite Reign instead.
    Reply 0
  • Batman: Arkham Knight is another step away from the intimacy of Arkham Asylum

  • ExplodingClown 30/05/2015


    I suspect it's less Rocksteady to blame for the direction things are moving than the iron corporate grip of WB/DC on the backs of their necks. Bearing in mind how fanatical they reputedly are about creative control of their IP (especially with Marvel currently trouncing them in the bankability stakes), it must be a nightmare to try to put a project together with them having final approval on every little thing you do....
    Reply 0
  • ExplodingClown 28/05/2015

    Still not put off, though I dislike the movement of the art style away from the more fantastic Asylum/City look to the kind of tiresome COD-lite fake realism of Origins. No doubt it's to show off the new engine and all, but what appears in the screenshots so far is harsh and ugly and misses that Gothic-grotesque sweet spot the other games hit so well.

    Apparently the DLC (so says the Season Pass blurb anyway) will include "classic" Batmobiles and outfits. I'm kind of hoping that'll include the Asylum ones; will be stoked if it includes the Tim Burton ones; and will feel quiet sorrow if it just settles for the Nolan ones, though I liked the Dark Knight trilogy on its own merits. Any appearance of the Adam West gear will not be appreciated if the sound effects don't match. Boosters to 'Speed'!
    Reply +2
  • Carmageddon: Reincarnation review

  • ExplodingClown 30/05/2015

    Just Cause, Far Cry and Grand Theft Auto all come with advanced vehicular manslaughter fitted as standard
    ...whether you agree with that questionable statement or not, they also came with gigantic budgets from very wealthy publishers, and were made by very large teams. Stainless had to first buy back the rights to Carmageddon, and raise funding through Kickstarter. Bearing in mind how many KS projects stall, it's pleasant to see it made it to any kind of release.

    Plus, the cars look damn gorgeous now. And it was always about the cars. Maybe Carmageddon was the bootleg 'Death Race 2000' with a little dash of 'The Cars That Ate Paris', but it always skewed more heavily towards 'Wacky Races with psychopaths'.

    Only problem I've had with it is the severely tiresome levels of puerile scatology in much of the in-game text, which often tries so hard to fit in some sub-Viz adolescent sniggering it loses all meaning (I still can't figure out what 'After Touching Cloth' powerup actually does). But a quick internet search found some tools provided by the modding community, so that was easy enough to change.
    Reply +5
  • Double Fine regains Iron Brigade publishing rights, PC version now 80% off

  • ExplodingClown 28/05/2015

    Oh thank FUCK. I uninstalled this because pissing GFWL kept interrupting, but had been really enjoying it til that point. Re-installing right now! Reply 0
  • Where is GTA5's single-player story DLC?

  • ExplodingClown 21/05/2015

    If they'd just spend some of their squillions on decent writers, they'd probably have released this by now. All the pretty graphics and huge gameworld can't disguise how fucking tired the GTA 'schtick' feels. Reply -2
  • Homophobic and transphobic game removed from Steam Greenlight

  • ExplodingClown 06/05/2015

    Ah. So "I'm trolling" is just the new Irony Defence, eh? Though it seems that posturing as a martyr to speech repression when you get called out for being a prick never gets old. It's about 90% of Fox News content, for a start.

    Also it's really confusing when people start the old 'PC' verbiage on a videogame website. Quite a lot of cognitive dissonance for a while as I tried to work out what your gaming platform of choice had to do with a distaste for bigotry.

    Yeah, but this just looks really idiotic. If you're trying to make a point about people being overly sensitive, hijacking causes, white knighting, whatever you want to call it, you've got to do it with more wit and subtlety than this. You can run up to an elderly nun and shout "CUNT!" but you can't claim by doing it you're making some kind of incisive critique about the Catholic church's ingrained revulsion for human sexuality. In a suitable context, this as a mini-game could have been a really strong moment in a bigger game - maybe a character is playing something and really getting off on it, you can't see what it is, then they offer you a go without telling you anything, and Whoa Nelly! Now it will only be remembered - if at all - as a big sticky skid mark on Mr. Herman's CV.
    Reply +2
  • New Batman: Arkham Knight trailer shows off Robin, Nightwing and Catwoman

  • ExplodingClown 28/04/2015

    Hope you get to play as the other characters outside of challenge maps or using them as power ups. The Catwoman sections of AC were a joy because of the speed and agility of the character, the fighting felt fast and light, and navigating the city took a bit of thought. Going back to being Batman felt almost cumbersome afterward. Reply 0
  • Footage released of canned Alan Wake 2 prototype

  • ExplodingClown 21/04/2015

    Barry was a character you'd never get tired of punching, and Alan's writing wasn't so much "stuffy" as flat-out dreadful, like Dan Brown with a head injury. The game was fun, but dumb as fuck. Reply 0