3william56 Comments

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  • Nintendo's new online service looks like it could be every bit as bad as you feared

  • 3william56 21/07/2017

    So.. 2 hands for the game - how do I hold the phone?



    Maybe Ninty thinks that Splatoon players really are squid.

    Curious - what are the required permissions for the app? Usually a blatantly stupid move to shoehorn folks (esp. kids) towards a phone app is a sneaky way to access and sell their data as a subsidy to the company.

    @LelandPalmer
    You're a squid
    You're a kid
    You're a squid
    You're a kid
    You're a squid
    You're a c**t?
    Reply +2
  • Atari is making a hat with speakers in it

  • 3william56 21/07/2017

    Atari Stereo Speaker Hat...
    What could I possibly shorten that to to describe anyone who would buy it..?
    Reply +67
  • Xbox One X promises a strong and stable line-up

  • 3william56 12/06/2017

    Xbox
    Xbox 1
    XBox One X (XB.O.X.)

    Did Microsoft run out of budget before selecting a name and had to recycle old console name stickers? Bought too many Xs, Bs and Os for the Xbones they didn't sell? Are they allergic to "2"?

    "Yo dawg, I heard you like Xs in your box. So here's an X on your box in your Xbox box."
    Reply +2
  • No Man's Sky community deciphers cryptic Hello Games cassette message

  • 3william56 08/06/2017

    Bloody hell. Still b*tthurt w*nkers whining about this?
    People still not getting that features get dropped and changed in development because of time/cost/feasibility?
    Precious snowflakes still upset that their own projected wants weren't fully provided for?
    Sad.

    NMS is a great if occasionally flawed game for those who actually paid attention to what it was, and a shameful episode of ongoing treatment of a talented and dedicated team.
    Reply -1
  • G2A rep roasted by developers during live Q&A

  • 3william56 21/04/2017

    @SupremeAC Because it's actually about ethics in game key reselling, natch. Reply -1
  • WipEout Omega Collection speeds onto PS4 in June

  • 3william56 31/03/2017

    I remember the day when I found out that the game disk for 2097/XL was also a CD which played all the soundtracks. Mind => Blown.

    Anyway - you're all wrong about the best music track.
    Underworld, Tin There. Just builds and builds along with your speed.
    A musical version of Zone.

    Reply +1
  • My word game rage shame

  • 3william56 28/03/2017

    @carmagainagain So... someone who is paid to write content that gets people to click on the site and article has got you to click on the site and article at least 7 times. And you don't even *like* the article. And you've fallen for it many times before by your own admission.

    Sounds like (a) she did and does a excellent job, (b) and you are a sucker.

    Carry on.
    Reply +1
  • No Man's Sky patch 1.23 resolves PS4 Pro 4K frame-rate issues

  • 3william56 22/03/2017

    Damn, I love this game. Pretty sure the only game I've ever played more of was the O.G. Elite on a steam-driven BBC Model B (which had even less to do, and also almost no missions or end game - suck it haters).

    Flawed, and marmite for sure, and never going to be liked by the hypercaffeinated objective-junkie CoD majority, but if it gets it's gentle hooks into you, it's a relaxing time sink like no other. Never seen another game that actually gets what "explore" means.

    Also worth stating that it's probably the prettiest game in recent times, and an incredible technical achievement, especially by a small team. Can't wait to see their world-generating tech used again.

    So happy HG are sticking with it despite the shameful treatment they received.
    Reply +1
  • Universe simulator Everything's trailer is an astounding short film in its own right

  • 3william56 15/03/2017

    To quote someone in Pink Floyd: "it's either drugs, or a dodgy meat pie".

    Can't decide whether it's Flower-level genius, or peak hipster Pseud's Corner tosh. But I am damn glad the Playstation continues it's fine tradition of being a home for utterly unconventional games and experiences like this.
    Reply +3
  • Nintendo's precarious reveal runs risk of Switching off fans

  • 3william56 16/01/2017

    Reply 0
  • No Man's Sky changed the video game hype train forever

  • 3william56 28/12/2016

    "What's clear is some players felt misled"
    Felt. There it is, right there.

    What NMS has maybe changed is that it is sinking in how overentitled and toxic a large segment of the gaming community has become when they don't get what they promise themselves. The bile spewed at a small team who achieved an incredible technical achievement (when others with gazillions of kickstarter dollars only manage to send out demos and sell overpriced virtual spaceships f'rinstance) was gamergate-level embarrasing to witness, and even more inexplicable. I was keeping a reasonably keen eye on the NMS (hell, it was on my Xmas list last year), and apart from the ability to see other players, I didn't see anything significant missing.

    Yep, it had (and still has) some clunky systems and the inventory was a pain, and the quest ends were a bit of a non event, but my personal theory is that a lot of that was caused by the incessant "what do you do?" coverage - it always felt that Hello tacked on a bunch of stuff to keep the reviewers happy.

    Another theory of mine is that a tonne of the backlash was caused by the game pushing deep set psychological buttons on modern gamers. We've bred an over-caffinated, short attention span, hand holding generation. NMS is slow, quiet, doesn't tell you what to do, doesn't show you where everything is, and >shock< denies you access to lots of stuff. You are not the centre of the universe. Which some of us f**king love, but seems to really push the wrong buttons on many. So much of the froth and fury seemed to be spoilt brats not getting what they wanted in-game.

    In truth, the game delivered >95% of what was shown and promised (no worse than most other games in recent times, and way better than many), it worked, and was, at the very worse, OK, and had no shitty DLC ripoffs or server fails. The reaction was no way justified by the actual game

    I remain mightily pissed at EG (and other game sites) for articles like this that validate the angry mob treatment of the HG team as if it was somehow reasonable - it was disgusting - they are real people who poured immense effort into a original passion project for f**ks sake. Quit complaining about the lack of risk taking and originality if you get on board a hatewagon like this.

    For older gamers like me, NMS was the game in my head when I played hundreds of hours of the original Elite decades back. I love the silence, the emptiness, the feeling of being small and lost, and the lens flare 70's prog-rock colourful space style. Which I suspect is exactly what HG were aiming at.

    I for one got exactly the game I wanted and expected, and I love it. And I hope the awful NMS experience hasn't put off too many small devs shooting for the moon instead of cashing in with Call of PokeCraft 7.

    @Hello Games - loads of us love you and adore the universe you made. Happy New Year.
    Reply -8
  • Stephen's Sausage Roll review

  • 3william56 25/12/2016

    Deck the halls with boughs of holly,
    TROLL LOL LOL LOL LOL
    LOL LOL LOL LOL
    Reply -10
  • No Man's Sky has been delayed three days on PC

  • 3william56 26/07/2016

    No Man's Sky - now with 18 quintillion and one planets. Reply +1
  • What would you uninvent about modern games?

  • 3william56 04/04/2016

    Health packs and bullet sponge characters.

    I remember when I finished Medal of Honor (the first PS1 one), and got the stat that my "realistic" WWII soldier had been shot 1300 times (damn Nazis). Which he walked off by chugging water flasks. Er, OK.

    Health packs have led to the escalating arms race of ever stupider numbers of enemies and firepower on one hand, and (ugh) auto-regenerating health on the other to compensate for getting shot to hell at every encounter without dying. Which kills player caution, tension and any stakes in playing realistically or intelligently.

    Excusable in a mech suit, tank or spaceship game. Stupid for a Nathan Drake or Lara Croft to shrug off a machine gun burst at point blank range.
    Reply -1
  • Quantic Dream reveals sci-fi game Detroit

  • 3william56 28/10/2015

    So effectively a straight continuation of Ex Machina (the recent film) - without the obvious problem that Ava would have run out of batteries after a day wandering around Tokyo?

    Could be good.
    Reply +1
  • DriveClub PlayStation Plus Edition launches with "caution" tomorrow

  • 3william56 25/06/2015

    So... which is the bigger E3 surprise?
    Shenmue on kickstarter,
    Last Guardian playable
    or Driveclub finally coming out on PS+

    Personally, I'd thought DC was going to be beaten to release by HalfLife 3.
    Reply +1
  • Destiny: The Taken King director defends 40 expansion price tag

  • 3william56 23/06/2015

    Destiny : The Taken Piss

    Ftfy
    Reply +6
  • The Mad Max game takes a different path to Fury Road

  • 3william56 27/05/2015

    If these guys aren't going hammer and tongs on a Furiosa DLC, they haven't been paying attention. Reply +2
  • H1Z1 bans 24,837 players for cheating

  • 3william56 20/05/2015

    Obligatory

    NSFW... jh114, you might want to look away.
    Reply +3
  • Mirror's Edge 2 due in Q1 2016

  • 3william56 06/05/2015

    1st Quarter 2016?
    Then why does the graphic have "Q4"?
    Reply 0
  • P.T. no longer available for re-download in the US

  • 3william56 06/05/2015

    One positive is that this finally reminded me to give PT a go (probably a lot of others too). Damn - that is some seriously ****ed up and incredibly relentless and intense stuff.

    Not my cup of entrails, but incredibly impressive stuff. I can see why folks are upset about Silent Hill being chopped up and hung from the ceiling screaming in a fridge.
    Reply +34
  • GTA 5's weird endgame

  • 3william56 15/04/2015

    @Guy.J. And when you realise that a game about robbing banks lets you submarine dive anywhere, to see a fully realised seabed with realistic wildlife (I make dive videos IRL, and even the seaweed is as spot-on as the rest of GTA V), that wow gets even wowwer. Ahem.

    I stumbled across the beautiful remains of what looked like a sunken paddle steamer yesterday. Something that has absolutely no value in the game itself.

    Apart from the awesome programming, the economics of having someone sit down and build this sort of detail in literally every square inch of the map blows my mind. Unbelievable achievement.
    Reply +82
  • Procedurally-generated high seas adventure Windward sets sails for May release

  • 3william56 13/04/2015

    I know this is one dude's amazing work, but I has hoping to see something with the mechanics of sailing combined with ship combat, not a re-skin of tank combat. Sailing ships don't manoeuver in circles and shrug off collisions like go-karts, and can't constantly shoot in any direction. Chuck those in and you'd have a tonne more strategic combat. Reply 0
  • Has Rockstar really downgraded GTA 5?

  • 3william56 31/03/2015

    @DF - Please take a look at texture pop-in. Until recently, it was rare and hardly noticable. Now. especially when flying, it's become very distracting. Flying near water at the distance where a flat texture is exchanged for the dynamic water surface results in a complete colour change. And building detail (like flags and balconies) erupting out of nowhere when driving is pretty distracting.

    I didn't have any problem with the performance in the last version. Hope this is something that can be unpatched.
    Reply 0
  • Digital Foundry: Hands-on with Sony's near-final Project Morpheus

  • 3william56 04/03/2015

    Some folk above forget that Move already has a stick controller



    It just means less accurate (accelerometer) tracking for one hand. Would be nice to have a combined version, but the capability is already there.

    Really though, asking for sticks is old school thinking and game design. Joypad sticks are not VR controls - you don't use one to walk to the shops. Look-direction controls from the helmet, and a "walk" button would be better for FPS or adventures, and flying using a dildo move controller to "grab" a virtual joystick is far more immersive than pressing an invisible joypad. Driving can be taken care of by virtual grabs, a wheel attachments if you are so inclined.



    The whole point of VR is to lose the buttons/sticks for the most part. and just grab like you do IRL.
    Reply +15
  • 3william56 04/03/2015

    The Kinect comparison only goes so far - it just didn't have (a) the "killer app", and (b) the level of popular momentum that VR has now.

    (b) has nicely been taken care of by Oculus, Samsung, Microsoft and HTC - it is everywhere now. The question, as always, is the killer app(s). That might actually be the easy part - CoD or similar in VR would sell these by the bucketload, and most games would be amazing in VR even if the graphic detail had to be pared back to get the framerate.

    I'm hoping that No Man's Sky provides an accessible VR Elite Dangerous for consoles.
    Good times!
    Reply +3
  • Velocity 2X is coming to Xbox One, PC, Mac and Linux

  • 3william56 26/02/2015

    Stunning game. Presumably it's done pretty well on PS4, so hope it does equally well on the other formats, so that we can get more next gen retro arcade stuff from FL. Reply +1
  • Q*Bert Rebooted review

  • 3william56 25/02/2015

    @terminaljeremy
    HA HA HA SPACE CAA-DET

    Gorf was the first time a computer pulled the p*ss and needed a good slap.
    Reply 0
  • Untangling Evolve's convoluted DLC plan

  • 3william56 16/01/2015

    For all the b*gger ups on Driveclub, at least they didn't charge $25 for the rain. Reply +3
  • Monster Hunter 4 Ultimate is the series at its approachable best

  • 3william56 16/01/2015

    Digital Foundry: "Excessive Jaggis, should have used MSAA, 5/10"

    EG: As this game hasn't got much visibility in the West, please make sure that you don't review it just for folk familiar with the last 3. Write it for the majority like me who've heard the game name, but wouldn't know WTF a Jaggi is or what the game is. Start by describing what the actual game is about and does, and you stand a better chance of attracting new players.
    Reply +5
  • Here's what DriveClub's upcoming Japanese track looks like

  • 3william56 16/01/2015

    @Retro-Fit The camera droplets are to balance against folk using the in-car view. If one had their view obscured by rain, and one didn't, it would be an unfair advantage.

    Back to the vid: damn, that is unbelievable. My resistance to wait for the PS+ version crumbles with every vid I see.

    6/10 my arse.
    Reply -3
  • Survival racer Distance boosts to PS4 in 2015

  • 3william56 03/12/2014

    Interesting and pretty, though (maybe because of the clips shown) it looks a little like a car themed Temple Run. More bends please.

    @Thefirstdoor - care to describe the gameplay? Is it actually a racer with freedom to drive over the track, or is it more like a lane runner / avoid-em-up?
    Reply 0
  • Digital Foundry: Hands-on with Evolve

  • 3william56 10/11/2014

    Message to devs:

    Please only put in the water physics and weather effects and hair fluttering in the wind and all the other visual trinkets after you have 1080 and 60fps running. And as soon as either one of those numbers starts to drop, quit adding glossy crap or have a "switch off" option.

    Ta.
    Reply +5
  • Lords of the Fallen review

  • 3william56 28/10/2014

    @penhalion Technical slips and attention to details are lacks if ethics now? No wonder the Gamergate idiots are so riled up. Reply +4
  • What's new in PlayStation 4's firmware update 2.0?

  • 3william56 28/10/2014

    Got to admit, although DLNA was a killer feature on the PS3 and was previously my top want, it's becoming less important, as most newish "smart" tellies will do it out of the box. Or a Chromecast/Roku/Slingbox, media PC, blu-ray player, Apple tv. Hell, even a phone/Tablet with a HDMI cable.

    There's so many options for getting a media file up on the telly, I can understand that it's not a big priority any more. Ditto iPlayer etc. and other media functions. Happier they are concentrating on game features which can't be done elsewhere.

    Remote play will save me a walk downstairs when the wife hits another racing section on Lego Marvel. :P
    Reply +4
  • Microsoft shipped 2.4m Xbox consoles last quarter

  • 3william56 24/10/2014

    In other news, winter to have 102% more Christmas than autumn. Reply +6
  • InnerSpace could be the prettiest aerial exploration game on the horizon

  • 3william56 23/10/2014

    Do we have a name for this pastelly flat Google nexus art style yet?
    It's the new pixelart / cel shading etc. About 3 months from being done to death.

    I was getting interested, despite the horrible music in the vid.
    And then I saw "Kickstarter".
    Reply +1
  • Spec Analysis: Alienware Alpha

  • 3william56 23/10/2014

    $800 and *still* no usual 1080p/60? Reply -1
  • Civilian massacring game Hatred courts controversy, gets it

  • 3william56 17/10/2014

    No-one who has ever got laid would want this.
    Angry Virgin Teenage Inadequacy - The Video Game.
    Reply +4
  • Anita Sarkeesian cancels university speech following school shooting threat

  • 3william56 15/10/2014

    Are YOU An Asshole?

    Find out with this simple test:

    1) Fighting for Social Justice is
    (a) A good thing
    (b) A bad thing

    2) #Gamergate is about ethics in videogame reporting
    (a) No
    (b) Yes

    3) Does your post contain an 1 line acknowledgement that harassment is bad, followed by "but" and >10 lines about videogame reviews or feminism?
    (a) No
    (b) Yes

    4) Do you believe that silencing offensive opinions on a private internet forum is an attack on freedom of speech?
    (a) No
    (b) Yes

    5) Do you think this story is anything to do with the veracity of Anna Sarkeesian's arguments, skill as a "journalist" or personality?
    (a) No
    (b) Yes

    Score 0 for each answer (a), and 1 for each answer (b)

    Your Score:
    0 - Congratulations - you are not an asshole
    >0 - Guess what?
    Reply +27
  • Bayonetta 2 review

  • 3william56 13/10/2014

    Second climax?
    Come again?
    Reply +21
  • Destiny player finds way to access future DLC area

  • 3william56 08/10/2014

    Genuine question. How much effort does dropping in the enemies require, compared with designing the level? I'd presume the level design should already have decided this. If so, it's a shoddy move. Reply +7
  • PlayStation Plus' October offerings include DriveClub, Spelunky and Dust: An Elysian Tail

  • 3william56 02/10/2014

    Arkham whatnow? Are they trying to get me back from my PS4?

    Shame EG didn't review Velocity 2X. It's a corker of a nu-skool "arcade" game schmup, and well worth the low low price of free. Surprisingly not as insanely hard as the vids make it out to be - the teledash is a classic new platformer move.

    Here's hoping DC lives up to the hype.
    Reply +3
  • S.W.A.P., an FPS without guns, is out now for free

  • 3william56 26/09/2014

    @ItsLatch But by sniping them you move, and lose your vantage point, no?

    This could be fascinating. Worth a try.
    Reply -2
  • Ex-Team Ico devs reveal trailer for exploratory adventure Vane

  • 3william56 26/09/2014

    Journey + Ico + Flower + Shadow. Ah yeah.

    Though I really think it would be improved if the eagle were to merge with another animal. Like, oh, I dunno, say, a giant cat maybe?

    I just hope that we won't be waiting in vane for this one too...
    /coat
    Reply +7
  • Thomas Was Alone outed for Wii U and Xbox One on German ratings board

  • 3william56 17/09/2014

    Sweet, fun and thought provoking game. Glad to see it has been a success. Reply 0
  • Pac-Man Championship Edition DX is coming to iOS

  • 3william56 17/09/2014

    So, like Sonic and Mario before him, Pac gets tarted up in lipstick and high heels and sent out on the streets to turn cheap tricks for pennies.

    Depressing.
    Reply -2
  • Microsoft to buy Mojang for $2 billion - report

  • 3william56 10/09/2014

    Mojang makes $100 million/yr in profits.
    Microsoft buys Mojang for $2 billion.
    So... Microsoft will have to sustain peak Minecraft for 20 years to see a dime profit? Plus interest, so say 25...
    Even Ninty couldn't pimp Mario and co that hard.

    Take cover! Dot bomb 3.0 incoming!

    Serious question: how much has WoW made in it's entire life?
    Reply +5
  • PS4 Remote Play is coming to Sony's Xperia Z3 mobile devices

  • 3william56 05/09/2014

    As folks on other forums have pointed out - approximately 0.3 seconds after this hits a Z3, some darkroom genius over at XDA will have a general issue version ready for any decently specced Android phone or tablet even if Sony don't. Looking forward to it. Reply 0
  • Gearbox explains why it should be dropped from Aliens lawsuit

  • 3william56 01/08/2014

    So... in summary, trying to rip people off is OK as long as you do it so badly you don't actually make any money. And lying to a vast number of people is OK because some of them might not have heard you. Oh. OK then. Case dismissed.
    :champo2:
    Reply +2