Rate the last film you watched out of 100 Page 2605

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  • Short-Round 25 Apr 2014 20:18:22 1,181 posts
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    Enemy - 7/10

    Interesting enough little mystery film. Jake Gyllenhaal plays a teacher, who one day sees a guy in a film who looks exactly like him, so he sets out to meet him. Won't spoil anything, but it's pretty much a 90 minute Twilight Zone episode. Jake is also pretty good in it.

    My only two complaints are I didn't find the ending very satisfying, and the film is quite often very dark, making it hard to actually see what's going on.
  • Recon64 26 Apr 2014 12:50:19 46 posts
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    Chronicle.

    3 teens find a hole in the ground with a large thing.....
    All of them feint.

    Over the course of days, they change...

    3 flying boys, need i say more?
    It is not as simple as i typed, nor lacking a stoty, it is fucking excellent.
    This film has no hollywoodness to it, it gives you a realistic look.

    8/10
  • PES_Fanboy 26 Apr 2014 16:11:28 17,081 posts
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    Divergent

    So this was a story about a post-apocalyptic world where, in order to not repeat mistakes of the past, society is split (unnecessarily) into different factions. What's the worst that could happen?

    Anyway, we start off with a couple of siblings who you never really get to care much about, and they're having to choose which faction to join. The factions are:

    Aspergers - this faction can only tell the truth, specifically if it is quite rude to do so, which is apparently useful for something.
    Nerds - the nerds do something useful, I guess with computers and shit
    Pussies - they are the useless leaders, of course, because if history tells us anything, the selfless make the best leaders, and are unoverthrowable
    Parkour - they like jumping off buildings and stuff, for, y'know, Reasons. They're the coolest, because all the guys are gay.
    Shitjobs - ain't no motherfucker wants to join these, because they do things like work the fields (manually, because technology has only moved on for weapons and computers, not agriculture)

    Both of our kids are born into The Pussies, but decide to change at their Sweet Sixteen party, the boy going to The Nerds whilst the girl chooses Parkour along with Lenny Kravitz's daughter, who looks just happy to be here and not listening to her dad's terrible music. Anyway, forget about the Aspergers and Shitjobs, they don't get a look in.

    There follows a meaningless, hour-long montage of how hard it is to get into Parkour, where the only thing that's cherished is fare dodging on the C-Train (oh, it's set in Chicago, forgot to say). But the guy who snorted a shitty tenner in the Inbetweeners is into Parkour and takes his shirt off to reveal: Callum Best. Callum likes the new Parkour recruit, and eventually puts his winkie woo in her doo-dah (I imagine).

    Finally we find out that the girl who you don't care about, is a Divergent which we never really find out why, but the Nerds are using the Parkour via brainwashing to wipe them and the Pussies out, via Kate Winslet, who looks throughout as if she knows this is the sort of thing she's already reaching for the IMDB Tipp-ex. There's a fight at the end, and most people die, including me inside, as I have realized too late that this is total fucking dogshit and I've just wasted my life typing it up, but in the hope nobody else has to see this utter cuntsnot.

    98/100
  • takosuke 26 Apr 2014 16:46:06 320 posts
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    Faust (2011)

    ‘A despairing scholar sells his soul to the devil in exchange for one night with a beautiful young woman.’ - IMDb

    German language, by Russian director Aleksandr Sokurov, and yes, it has sub titles. I watched the Bluray, and given the smudgy look of the film, my guess is, the Dvd probably looks almost as good. At least the sub titles looked HD.

    The first thing that catches the viewers attention is the square picture framing, with rounded off corners - why is this? As for the story, well, there’s no real sense of it attempting to really grab the viewer in any real way. The story follows two characters looking for meaning, they drift from one scene to the next, meeting various characters. I liked the dreamy quality the film possesses, and the acting’s pretty good. I went into Faust expecting more.

    7/10

    Bluray Extras: There aren’t any.
  • Tom_Servo 26 Apr 2014 17:29:10 18,004 posts
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    Please review all the films, PES.
  • Bremenacht 26 Apr 2014 17:34:07 18,719 posts
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    PES_Fanboy wrote:
    Divergent

    utter cuntsnot.

    98/100
    So... is this the very best of the cuntsnot genre 98/100, or a case of 'this is cuntsnot 2/100, avoid'.
  • PES_Fanboy 26 Apr 2014 17:40:49 17,081 posts
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    No, I was quite clear. Cuntsnot, 98%. My worst score I've ever given.
  • kentmonkey 26 Apr 2014 18:14:49 20,760 posts
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    Citizen Kane
    Finally got to watch it. Can see why it's loved by so many, and thought it was fantastically well directed and shot, especially considering it's age. Perhaps didn't 'wow' me like I had hoped it would, but then I think I went in with expectations unfairly high. It was certainly memorable though. 7/10

    Wreck-It Ralph
    Far better than I expected. Not up there with the greatest animated films of all time, but enjoyed it nonetheless and found it quite amusing at times. Good voiceover work as well. 7/10

    Monsters University
    Bland, nowhere near as good as the first and very few laughs. 5/10

    Superman Man of Steel
    Dislike pretty much everything about it, and on second viewing (I wanted to give it another go) I couldn't even pay it my full attention for the duration. Just an awful film. Far too much carnage, didn't really feel 'Superman' at all and the acting was fucking terrible by many. Arguably Smallville had better acting, and that's saying something. Even worse than the first viewing. 2/10
  • Kostabi 26 Apr 2014 18:24:29 4,976 posts
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    Anchorman 2 - 1/10

    Even the 1 feels generous. I think I only laughed at the Tina Fey cameo which was 30 seconds of entertainment from a 2 hour running time. Everyone involved in this abomination needs punching squarely in the cock.
  • darkmorgado 26 Apr 2014 18:25:24 15,566 posts
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    It's a shame you didn't get your reviews out earlier. Disney would surely have loved to get "as good as citizen Kane" on the wreck it Ralph poster!

    Support the Mowgli Dirty Protest!

  • iancognito 26 Apr 2014 18:30:10 1,400 posts
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    Probably don't want to watch the original King Kong. The ape climbing the Empire State Building looks crap. ;)
  • Bremenacht 26 Apr 2014 19:00:03 18,719 posts
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    DiddlerDo wrote:
    Lone Ranger 8/10
    I took a punt and saw it on release. Thought it was good fun. Much better than reviews suggested.
  • Ziz0u 26 Apr 2014 19:02:34 8,490 posts
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    Recon64 wrote:
    Chronicle.

    3 teens find a hole in the ground with a large thing.....
    All of them feint.

    Over the course of days, they change...

    3 flying boys, need i say more?
    It is not as simple as i typed, nor lacking a stoty, it is fucking excellent.
    This film has no hollywoodness to it, it gives you a realistic look.

    8/10
    Nope. You had me at flying boys.
  • Deleted user 26 April 2014 20:03:55
    Fozzie_bear wrote:
    It's a shame you didn't get your reviews out earlier. Disney would surely have loved to get "as good as citizen Kane" on the wreck it Ralph poster!
    Thanks Fozzie :) Made me laugh as I was thinking similar
  • kentmonkey 26 Apr 2014 20:28:04 20,760 posts
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    And in some respects it even shits all over it.

    Like animation. And colour.
  • mrpon 26 Apr 2014 20:42:07 29,184 posts
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    Ha ha

    Give yourself £5 or ½ gig, you're worth it.

  • OptimusPube 26 Apr 2014 21:06:00 3,137 posts
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    Keep going Poohcorner, priceless.

    Danny MacAskill gives me a boner

  • CosmicFuzz 26 Apr 2014 21:06:55 24,834 posts
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    Haha! :D very good

    Looking for a new video game podcast? Try ours! (And give us a rating on iTunes!) :)

  • iancognito 26 Apr 2014 21:07:48 1,400 posts
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    He was rich and could afford a new sledge. It makes no sense.
  • Deleted user 26 April 2014 21:42:27
    poohcorner wrote:


    Okay, I'm done now.

    Thanks mate, those were funny. :D
  • kentmonkey 26 Apr 2014 21:50:32 20,760 posts
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    Loving the posters
  • Deleted user 26 April 2014 21:54:03
    DiddlerDo wrote:
    Lone Ranger 8/10

    Went in expecting it to be shit. Looked rubbish from the trailers and heard reviews tore it apart but I thought it was fucking brilliant. Just a really good, genuine family adventure film in the same vain as the various classics from the 80s and 90s. Really wasn't expecting it to be that good. When the music came on near the end it was jump up on your seat awesome.

    On the Netherlands Netflix btw.
    Spot on I was one of the few who liked this on release got an unfair rap although it was astronomically expensive >$300M
  • Maturin 26 Apr 2014 23:20:52 3,098 posts
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    I've just watched The Lone Ranger on NowTV and I echo the other comments on this page of the thread. It was really good fun.

    I think most of the money must have gone into SFX - there were a ton of them - and mostly very good. The train chase at the end must have cost a fortune - even though most of it was CG.

    Edited by Maturin at 23:33:30 26-04-2014
  • DUFFMAN5 27 Apr 2014 06:57:33 14,963 posts
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    Hunger Games: Catching Fire.
    Really enjoyed it. The Roman Empire. The Nazi party, The Ghetto, Genocide...we get it, we get it!

    Cat-nip as good as ever as were the support. Strange time to end the film, is the last part out this year ?
    I enjoyed both films, this one was probably slightly more serious, just as camp mind you.

    80%

    O Brother, Where Art Thou?
    Excellent, first time viewing, Clooney and his Dapper Dan pomade and hairnet being a fav. It has not dislodged No Country for old men and Burn After reading as my fave Coen films, but it is defo up there. Soundtrack is ace, but I already knew that being a Bluegrass fan.

    80%


    My afore mentioned " Gangster Brit-Flix" viewing has been ongoing this week:

    Dead Man Running, actually one of the better ones, I think I only counted one "Cunt" more "comedy" in this one. 50%
    Bonded By Blood. just about ok. 40%
    Gangster, not too sure of the title it was filmed "mockumentry" style, about a Northern Gangster just out of prison. No score, it was shite I turned it off 30 mins in.

    "Duffman the grey is thrusting in the direction of the problem! Oh, yeah!"

  • khaz 27 Apr 2014 07:13:48 2,815 posts
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    takosuke wrote:
    Faust (2011)

    ‘A despairing scholar sells his soul to the devil in exchange for one night with a beautiful young woman.’ - IMDb

    German language, by Russian director Aleksandr Sokurov, and yes, it has sub titles. I watched the Bluray, and given the smudgy look of the film, my guess is, the Dvd probably looks almost as good. At least the sub titles looked HD.
    I dont understand. Subtitles are the only acceptable form of watching films in a foreign language.
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