HOW DARE YOU.
The Life of PI – 67/100
To start off, the film is perfectly watch-able - much like you might have mistakenly chatted with a Jehovah's witness at your front door for two hours because they were wearing a BT uniform and carrying a toolbox. If that seems a little harsh, then its because of one single line in the film that PI says to the struggling author. “Now it's your story to tell”, a blatant “go spread the word of God” instruction to the audience imo.
For anyone less concerned about religious indoctrination, there is still a small matter of it aiming to tell a story in the style of the excellent Big Fish (staring Ewan McGregor) and not quite getting there. It has a decent start, a decent middle, but the end doesn't quite match or feel appropriate imo; despite largely copying the Disney Jungle Book structure. It is a film worth a watch for most people and I suspect most will enjoy it more than I did.
Life of Pi will ALWAYS be 'that film that everyone wanked on and fucking on about when it came out, "ooooh look at the tiger" and "ooooh look at the water" and "ooooh, aren't the effects amazing" and "oooooh its so spiritual and meaningful and film of the year yah" and that I as a result developed a pathological avoidance for and have absolutely no interest in and no I haven't seen it yet and no I really don't think I'm missing out and look please will you stop banging on about it because I just don't give a fuck', and no amount of whining about how it's about God will change that.
Any Netflix library in the world for a couple of quid a month? Gimme!