Rate the last film you watched out of 100 Page 3486

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  • kentmonkey 10 May 2017 16:38:04 22,153 posts
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    @Dougs It really was disappointing.

    It's almost impossible to make it as terrible as it is. Even the directing and camera work leaves a lot to be desired. It makes me wonder how badly they conducted the interviews if they genuinely felt that footage about someone's bad back and getting OD'd on Valium was worthy of including in the footage. You've got a potential gold mine of stuff there - get it and use it. And at least try to interview one absolute nut jub to give it some comedy value, rather than 6-8 of the most bland, self-absorbed arseholes on the set (Prowse withstanding).

    (To be fair, having just looked it up, it's getting a 'mixed reception' on sites like IMDB, so some are obviously getting mileage out of it (it's averaging around 5/10 on most sites, so there are obviously some giving it near 10s at least).
  • mal 10 May 2017 17:04:27 27,901 posts
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    But even The Phantom Menace gets an average of 6/10 between IMDB and RT. So it's not quite as good as TPM then.

    Star Wars films aren't subject to the same out-of-ten ratings as normal films.
  • kentmonkey 10 May 2017 18:45:22 22,153 posts
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    When you put it like that, there's no defending it.
  • VanillaLake 10 May 2017 20:12:24 288 posts
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    I watched the three new Star Wars films and Ioved them. I haven't watched the old three films yet! I'll probably get them all on BD if the old ones are remastered.
  • evild_edd 10 May 2017 22:35:37 3,807 posts
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    Dougs wrote:
    @kentmonkey That is very disappointing. I spied it too and was quite looking forward to that. Especially as I grew up a stone's throw from the studios, SW, Superman et al was such a big thing for the village (well, town now). How frustrating.

    Edit: Although the title irritated me a tad. The studios were in Borehamwood, not Elstree...that's the posh part of town a mile or two away!
    I also lived in Borehamwood (or 'Da Wood' as I once heard someone refer to it) for a few years (2002-2008, give or take). Always thought it was odd that Elstree film studios were in Borehamwood and not actually Elstree...

    Think it was just a way of sounding posher.
  • mal 10 May 2017 23:12:26 27,901 posts
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    So this evenings entertainment has been The Handmaiden (the shorter 144 minute version). I hadn't noticed this wasn't your usual 15 rated film that gets released these days, and it certainly makes use of that X rating. And at the same time it's quite smart in its use of the unreliable narrator at almost every level. It's like Verhoven times three or four at least.

    It's also slyly funny throughout. If I had to score it I'd give it 94%.
  • Tonka 11 May 2017 06:55:14 25,555 posts
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    Sword Master
    Classic Wuxia fodder (well, classic as in checks all the boxes but the film is from 2016). Modern over the top CGI looks for the scenery but most of the fighting was straight up wire-fu. Does that thing that I tend to find all eastern films/comics/animes does where the plot kind of skip hops around the western story arc model.

    Good entertainment and some cool fights. I'm not exactly blown away but it's definitely

    For fans of the genre
  • JoelStinty 11 May 2017 18:38:13 5,483 posts
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    The Nice Guys.

    Typical Shane black. A decent fun watch in a superficial and light hearted way. Probably won't hold up on a second viewing as i find with all of his films, but you can't really argue against it as it is just ..well good no brains fun.

    3/5
  • Dougs 11 May 2017 21:13:34 82,332 posts
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    evild_edd wrote:I also lived in Borehamwood (or 'Da Wood' as I once heard someone refer to it) for a few years (2002-2008, give or take). Always thought it was odd that Elstree film studios were in Borehamwood and not actually Elstree...

    Think it was just a way of sounding posher.
    I think we've had this conversation before. It was always The Wood when I was there... But I guess things have moved on since I left in 1988...

    (or The Vill, as the town centre was known)
  • captbirdseye 11 May 2017 23:38:32 7,976 posts
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    Alien: Covenant

    If you like imagery then your in for a treat, but everything else is so painfully mediocre and is basically Prometheus 1.5.

    The characters are boring, stupid (Alien included) and given barely any meaningful back story to care about. The dialogue is woeful and it's usually during emtional moments when you just end up - lol. The tone of film is a mess where it goes from pompus scifi to horror to Marvel esc action that the film just ends up not knowing what it wants to be.

    The film messes around with the lore in a really hamfisted and dissapointing way that gets really frustrating, and some scenes are hilariously bad the first Alien fight and when ObiFassbender turns up.

    It's a really frustrating film that just seems slightly pointless. At least Fassbender was good :s.

    Summary - 2 hours of stupid people doing stupid stuff.

    3/10

    Edited by captbirdseye at 23:41:42 11-05-2017
  • CosmicFuzz 12 May 2017 00:09:15 31,893 posts
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    I keep reading folk saying the characters are rubbish in the new Alien, no backstory etc, but I honestly can't remember any backstory to the characters in the original Alien either.
  • Dougs 12 May 2017 05:29:13 82,332 posts
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    @captbirdseye how very disappointing. But not entirely surprising...
  • Dougs 12 May 2017 05:36:59 82,332 posts
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    CosmicFuzz wrote:
    I keep reading folk saying the characters are rubbish in the new Alien, no backstory etc, but I honestly can't remember any backstory to the characters in the original Alien either.
    Indeed. Back story was unimportant...in fact, not knowing any of that helped, made for a more focused film. And character development was good due to a decent script.
  • Load_2.0 12 May 2017 05:44:50 25,202 posts
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    The trailer did nothing for me. I wanted more alien vistas but it looked liked most of it was running in spaceship corridors and slamming doors/hatches closed at the last second. Zzzzz
  • captbirdseye 12 May 2017 06:47:24 7,976 posts
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    CosmicFuzz wrote:
    I keep reading folk saying the characters are rubbish in the new Alien, no backstory etc, but I honestly can't remember any backstory to the characters in the original Alien either.
    Maybe backstory was the wrong word. But they all have 0 chemistry and you just don't care whether they live or die.
  • JiveHound 12 May 2017 07:01:35 7,998 posts
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    captbirdseye wrote:
    CosmicFuzz wrote:
    I keep reading folk saying the characters are rubbish in the new Alien, no backstory etc, but I honestly can't remember any backstory to the characters in the original Alien either.
    Maybe backstory was the wrong word. But they all have 0 chemistry and you just don't care whether they live or die.
    Considering they released a prologue to try and address the criticism of the first (prom) regarding poor characters to make for more empathy towards the new cast that does sounds troubling.

    I'm going to see it tomorrow, I'm not expecting much but I hope it's at least better than Prom.
  • CosmicFuzz 12 May 2017 08:14:52 31,893 posts
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    captbirdseye wrote:
    CosmicFuzz wrote:
    I keep reading folk saying the characters are rubbish in the new Alien, no backstory etc, but I honestly can't remember any backstory to the characters in the original Alien either.
    Maybe backstory was the wrong word. But they all have 0 chemistry and you just don't care whether they live or die.
    Yeah fair enough - that is definitely important in a horror!
  • Dougs 12 May 2017 09:25:56 82,332 posts
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    Mindhorn definitely up on US Netflix. Trouble is, the last server on my VPN has been blocked, bah.
  • simpleexplodingmaybe 12 May 2017 18:42:26 3,720 posts
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    Can someone edit those Alien Covenant posts for being quite spoilery?
  • simpleexplodingmaybe 12 May 2017 18:45:53 3,720 posts
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    Alien Covenant

    I enjoyed it but can see why you'd hate it too

    It felt a lot like two films trying to coexist in the same space. Both independently interesting and well made but not quite managing to hold together as a single entity.

    I do appreciate the novelty of it being so different from what was trailed that some surprises are still allowed to exist in modern big budget cinema.


    7.5
  • MrFlay 13 May 2017 17:24:37 3,199 posts
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    Alien: Covenant - 5/10

    Not a good movie. Boring, poorly paced, edited and shot. A couple of decent performances but pretty much an all round shit show of a sequel that has no real reason to exist. Ridley Scott seems determined to flush the Alien franchise down the toilet after he wrings every last penny he can from it. It's not quite as bad as Prometheus but it has all of the same failings especially characters doing various stupid things to push the plot forward.

    The only good thing about the movie is that James Franco is killed before he gets a single line. It's also a sequel to Prometheus if you didn't know that.
  • Jmek 13 May 2017 17:41:02 1,511 posts
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    Alien Covenant - 90%

    Ridley Scott returns with a vengence, washing the dissapointment of Prometheus away with a tense, gory and utterly bonkers tale of Alien terror. Highly recommended.
  • CrispyXUKTurbo 13 May 2017 17:46:22 986 posts
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    Alien Covenant - 8/10

    Nothing new, but well done and tense as fuck.
  • Daddy-Doom-Bar 13 May 2017 18:19:37 2,800 posts
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    Is Alien Covenant the new Taken? Seems to be dividing people...
  • simpleexplodingmaybe 14 May 2017 01:24:59 3,720 posts
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    AVP: Alien vs Predator

    This is a stupid movie with loads of dumb things happening it in. It's very dated too. Lots of scenes that were obviously conceived as "totally badass" rather than keeping faith to the tone of either franchise. The number of Easter eggs suggests the makers know the originals well but just couldn't help making a daft gimmicky early 00s action film.

    It's not unenjoyable but it's not good either

    5/10
  • vDoll 14 May 2017 02:40:29 2,372 posts
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    A Cure for Wellness.

    Take two parts Shutter Island to one part Dracula and you get a movie that is painfully less than the sum of its parts. It's far too long, too flabby, too clumsy, too Gore Verbinski. A mind-bender for the Saturday night crowd, its final whistle tilt into pure gothic tragedy makes wish remixes were a thing in cinema; 'Another Director's Cut', so to speak.

    I gift thee... 68%
  • mal 14 May 2017 03:52:06 27,901 posts
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    I also watched AVP on C4 earlier tonight. I'd be tempted to put it into the 60-70% range even, because its story is more coherent than Prometheus' bloated mess. I consider whizz bang effects to be a bonus that I try not to score, so I can't mark it down for looking of it's time especially, and I'd say the main thing wrong with it as an action film is there's not enough alien versus predator stuff, with far too long spent on telling the story of puny humans getting to the site - which actually looking at the plot are entirely surplus to requirements - the preds were coming anyway, which would have kicked the whole thing off just fine.
  • JoelStinty 14 May 2017 06:42:19 5,483 posts
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    Warrior.

    Been meaning to watch this for years but never got round to it. Glad i did. Shed a few man tears. Completely contrived plot but works because the film takes the time to spend times around each character. Action is pretty brutal too. Good.

    4.5/5

    The lobster

    Enjoyed it. It actually surprised me that this wasn't a british/irish film because the emotional/sexual constipation delivered in the first half of this film in such a off hand way felt uniquely british. Obviously it isn't because it written and directed by someone who's is greek. Good to know that it is not just brits who are extremely retarded when it comes to such things... felt the first half was better than the first, the second taking a much darker and sinister look at religious control over sexuality. Film is perhaps uneven at times, but i found myself throughly engrossed by it and it didn't annoy me as much it thought it would.

    3.5/5

    Edited by JoelStinty at 06:50:22 14-05-2017
  • Jono62 14 May 2017 06:46:06 17,800 posts
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    @Dougs I've managed to get it working on Android:

    Install ExpressVPN and use Toronto. There is a 7 day trial.

    Don't know how long it'll stay working, mind.

    This was for Mindhorn, BTW!

    Edited by Jono62 at 06:48:34 14-05-2017
  • b0rk 14 May 2017 06:52:18 7,229 posts
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    @CrispyXUKTurbo

    I've felt more tension trying to decide what colour nail polish to use. Covenant is completely lacking any tension whatsoever.
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