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mcmonkeyplc wrote:I've never had to get it out, no. If I'm close to the phone, cock out is my default position.
Anyone get their knob out and have a wank while they are waiting for the person to finish their spiel?
Not that I do. Just wondering. You are afterall a bunch of sexual deviants.
Kirby is the man! Even if he wasn't, he'd just ingest and become one.
If you can see this, you're an idiot.
DFawkes wrote:Or ask them for a game of Lucky Hit.
I would've thought by your username you'd just ask them if they knew where you could find sailors.
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AGP.SRPT
w00t wrote:I do enjoy when they knock on my door, it's one of the few times I can get away with claiming to be a 'man of science'. Oh organised religion! How silly you are. I've also adopted the 'Men Who Stare at Goats' method recently that works wonders. Not managed to stop one's heart yet, there's always next time.
I managed to bore a Jehova's Witness into making her excuses and leaving.
Well, she did ask what I believed in if it wasn't God.
I went into a very quickly-spoken decription of transhumanism and various reasons why the Bible was not absolute truth, but a book with a few decent ideas and crazy stories. I wouldn't have bothered but she was pretty.
The world is going mad. Me? I'm doing fine.
nickthegun wrote:Like it nick - if they say OK then..?DFawkes wrote:Or ask them for a game of Lucky Hit.
I would've thought by your username you'd just ask them if they knew where you could find sailors.
Hi, this is dave from wanker windows
How about a game of lucky hit?
Er, no thanks. We just called to say we have people in your area giving free...
How about a game of lucky hit?
No thanks.... giving free quotes for doors and windows. Would you be interested in a call?
How about a game of lucky hit?
Fuck off
I've turned off all the avatars and crap, so don't expect me to be impressed by yours.
London open taekwondo champion
Rusty_M wrote:I say "Sorry, in a rush"
It's very hard to walk along streets around my work without being bothered by someone with a clipboard. I just pretend I'm on the phone and they leave me alone
Smuggo wrote:I've only ever been approached by one once, and I actually did that. I had just broke up with my gf and had to go to work so I was in a pretty bad frame of mind and the last thing I needed was one of those guys coming over to me. I had my earphones in so I thought he'd ignore me but I think because I was wearing smartish attire that attracted his attention. He came over to me and said something, didn't really hear what he said, but I just told him to eff off with a scowl on my face. I think he called me a wanker as I walked off, which I guess was fair enough. I actually regretted it later because it was pretty out of character for me.johnlenham wrote:Just telling them to fuck off generally works better and is much quicker.
Might not be relevant to most on here but the young folks can use the "under 18" against clipboard goons.
My brother got stoppe dby one and he said about how the guy gave a massive speech and my brother nodded along until the end
"So how old are you sir!"
"17! " with an added grin
The guys face was priceless.
It the most effective way and ive used it myself a few times but mostly just avoid them.
A wise man told me don't argue with fools
Cause people from a distance can't tell who is who
Thedni wrote:Similar story here, back when I was a student I managed to pwn some poor Jehovah botherer who tried to cite the Greek New Testament at me. I went upstairs, grabbed a copy of the Greek NT, came back down, asked him to read it to me. He couldn't, I could, I pwned him, he left. Pretty pathetic in hindsight, these days I'd give him a polite not today thank you and shut the door on him. Having yelling small children running around your ankles is always a useful prop to demonstrate why you don't have time to debate angels on the heads of pins.w00t wrote:I do enjoy when they knock on my door, it's one of the few times I can get away with claiming to be a 'man of science'. Oh organised religion! How silly you are. I've also adopted the 'Men Who Stare at Goats' method recently that works wonders. Not managed to stop one's heart yet, there's always next time.
I managed to bore a Jehova's Witness into making her excuses and leaving.
Well, she did ask what I believed in if it wasn't God.
I went into a very quickly-spoken decription of transhumanism and various reasons why the Bible was not absolute truth, but a book with a few decent ideas and crazy stories. I wouldn't have bothered but she was pretty.
I get very few via phone these days which is good, get more wrong numbers after the local chinease... and people looking to adopt dogs [That's always a blast].
say no to Eurogamer sigs
mwtb wrote:Don't feel bad. They get paid to hassle you and they just change charity t-shirts/jackets between jobs, they're not really attached to the charities they're chugging for.
Still, fuck them. Fuck them for making me feel bad about just wanting to be left in peace.
-- boobs do nothing for me, I want moustaches and chest hair.
A wise man told me don't argue with fools
Cause people from a distance can't tell who is who
otto wrote:I bet he's posted on a JW forum about the madman who ran off and returned waving a Greek NT at him!Thedni wrote:Similar story here, back when I was a student I managed to pwn some poor Jehovah botherer who tried to cite the Greek New Testament at me. I went upstairs, grabbed a copy of the Greek NT, came back down, asked him to read it to me. He couldn't, I could, I pwned him, he left. Pretty pathetic in hindsight, these days I'd give him a polite not today thank you and shut the door on him. Having yelling small children running around your ankles is always a useful prop to demonstrate why you don't have time to debate angels on the heads of pins.w00t wrote:I do enjoy when they knock on my door, it's one of the few times I can get away with claiming to be a 'man of science'. Oh organised religion! How silly you are. I've also adopted the 'Men Who Stare at Goats' method recently that works wonders. Not managed to stop one's heart yet, there's always next time.
I managed to bore a Jehova's Witness into making her excuses and leaving.
Well, she did ask what I believed in if it wasn't God.
I went into a very quickly-spoken decription of transhumanism and various reasons why the Bible was not absolute truth, but a book with a few decent ideas and crazy stories. I wouldn't have bothered but she was pretty.
I get very few via phone these days which is good, get more wrong numbers after the local chinease... and people looking to adopt dogs [That's always a blast].
.gif)
Act like a dumbshit and they will treat you as an equal
wayneh wrote:You realise that will just encourage them? That's right up their street.
My favourite with Jehovahs witnesses is to ask them if that at the end of the world will I be guaranteed a seat in heaven as there are more Jehovahs witnesses than there are seats as it is a finite number. And if I am not guaranteed a seat what will happen to me have I just wasted my time and should have chose a different religion?
say no to Eurogamer sigs
Smuggo wrote:Get an old fashioned answer machine.
My house number seems to get endless calls from annoying machine-based message systems and people asking for the previous occupant (who is dead). I'm on TPS but it hasn't made a difference. Any tips on stopping it (particularly the machine one as screaming abuse at it isn't an option)?
Shikasama wrote:/Stewie
As someone who used to do door-to-door charity sign ups (and a made a packet off it) I'd like to inform you all that you're witty retorts actually mean nothing. They don't affect the people doing it in the slightest and they just move on to the next one.
As for the 'I'd rather be pennyless than do this sort of job' comment, of course you would son. Being homeless and hungry is the much better solution.
and every £25 raised £10 you kept.
retty girls) could easily raise £180-200 pitching 9.30 - 5.30), at the end of the day your bucket would be opened by the staff and your pay would come DIRECTLY from the bucket.
heyyo! wrote:I always assumed people with buckets were volunteers. 40% cut is shocking! How much else will come off for admin of the charity?
Until a few months back I was doing a charity fundraising job (you know, bucket, high street/inside supermarket doors, "give me money I NEED"
-- boobs do nothing for me, I want moustaches and chest hair.
heyyo! wrote:Why would anybody waste their time doing that? And it's pretty obvious that they're working for money, hardly anybody thinks that those people do that stuff out of the kindness of their hearts. They should sympathise with you because I bet they wouldn't like being accosted in the street by some desperate idiot with a clipboard or a bucket. Given the choice of quietly going about my business and stacking shelves or annoying people on the streets and getting abuse for it, I'd take shelf stacking anyday. Criminals and pretty girls? I've seen quite a few of these charity clipboard people while out and about and none of them seemed to fit that mould to me. Which is a shame as I wouldn't mind a pretty girl approaching me, seeing as they never do
But anyway, the best way to get rid of charity fundraisers isn't telling them to "fuck off" you either a) upset a pretty girl b) get punched by criminals - i've seen both. You have to sympathise, telling them how hard it must be to stand around all day/confident to approach people/good cause etc basically act as though you think they're volunteering for free - then swiftly move on.
.
A wise man told me don't argue with fools
Cause people from a distance can't tell who is who
) thought it was strictly volunteers, shamefully it was only when I found out money was involved I signed up.Page
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