What to expect when dealing with solicitors?

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  • pacrifice 19 Feb 2014 18:04:27 1,039 posts
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    Witnessed a car accident, nothing major.

    So I'm off to the park to run and I heard a smash. Looked into the direction and it was a taxi driving away whilst the debris of the side view mirror of the car it touched, was flying through the air behind the taxi.

    I didn't see the driver, but quickly memorised the license plate. Knocked on the property that was facing the victim car and gave dude my name, number, and the license plate of the evil taxi.

    Well it's now two month's later and the victim car dude's left a voice message, that the evil taxi firm are denying it and his solicitors want to get in touch with me.

    What can I expect from them?

    I realise that there's the potential that it could go to court and I'd have to testify etc but in all likelihood, will they just take a written statement from me and that's it?
  • smoothpete 19 Feb 2014 18:05:44 31,331 posts
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    You're going down, sunshine. 25 to life, no parole.
  • kalel 19 Feb 2014 18:07:02 86,329 posts
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    Narc!
  • magicpanda 19 Feb 2014 18:07:18 13,262 posts
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    Bummed to death in a small pool of your own tears.
  • markytonline83 19 Feb 2014 18:40:53 131 posts
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    Maybe it's the taxi driver pretending to be the victim driver and as soon as he has your details and address he is going to come and bum you into next week

    PSN - markytonline83
    Vita, PS3 and PS4

  • CosmicFuzz 19 Feb 2014 18:43:16 23,177 posts
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    You'll give a statement over the phone, nothing stressful to worry about at all. It's super unlikely it'll ever go to court, the taxi firm will pay up for the damage long before it reaches that stage.

    Looking for a new gaming podcast to listen to? LOOK NO FURTHER!

  • DaM 19 Feb 2014 18:55:28 12,897 posts
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    You'll be fine, as long as you've never posted anything online about any issues with your eyes. If so they'll probably demand you get done for comtempt of court with your wonky eyes, and led out of the court in handcuffs.
  • senso-ji 19 Feb 2014 22:58:21 5,790 posts
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    magicpanda wrote:
    Bummed to death in a small pool of your own tears.
    I'll say; those solicitor charges are horrendous.
  • CosmicFuzz 19 Feb 2014 23:04:14 23,177 posts
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    senso-ji wrote:
    magicpanda wrote:
    Bummed to death in a small pool of your own tears.
    I'll say; those solicitor charges are horrendous.
    He won't be charged though. It'll be insurers who are foot the bill in the end anyway.

    Looking for a new gaming podcast to listen to? LOOK NO FURTHER!

  • Moot_Point 19 Feb 2014 23:09:48 3,912 posts
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    CosmicFuzz wrote:
    senso-ji wrote:
    magicpanda wrote:
    Bummed to death in a small pool of your own tears.
    I'll say; those solicitor charges are horrendous.
    He won't be charged though. It'll be insurers who are foot the bill in the end anyway.

    ================================================================================

    mowgli wrote: I thought the 1 married the .2 and founded Islam?

  • CosmicFuzz 19 Feb 2014 23:38:08 23,177 posts
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    Moot_Point wrote:
    CosmicFuzz wrote:
    senso-ji wrote:
    magicpanda wrote:
    Bummed to death in a small pool of your own tears.
    I'll say; those solicitor charges are horrendous.
    He won't be charged though. It'll be insurers who are foot the bill in the end anyway.
    Animal Cruelty!!!! WHO IS MY MSP I NEED TO COMPLAIN IMMEDIATELY!

    Edited by CosmicFuzz at 23:38:49 19-02-2014

    Looking for a new gaming podcast to listen to? LOOK NO FURTHER!

  • Wunty_Phyve 19 Feb 2014 23:52:18 969 posts
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    If it's anything like my experience with solicitors over the past 18 months you can expect them to ask you politely to accompany you into a small room. They will then request you unfasten your belt and pull down your underpants before bending over and splaying your arse cheeks. You will then feel the rather uncomfortable sensation of a throbbing hard penis coated in razorblades and tipped with ice being shoved up into your duodenum. That's right, all the way up there.

    Apologies if there are any solicitors present.
  • pacrifice 20 Feb 2014 11:54:12 1,039 posts
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    @DaM hmmmmm _
  • Load_2.0 20 Feb 2014 12:02:29 18,879 posts
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    Never let the solicitor get the upper hand. They are like dog's and can smell fear. When asked a question turn the tables on them.

    Solicitor: "Could you please state your name." You. "No but I could name a few states!"

    Solicitor. "Where were you on the night of the 15th?" You "I definitely wasn't banging your wife!" *Pause for effect.

    At points during the conversation scream that you are "Taking the 5th" and cite famous court cases. Yelling "objection!" repeatedly will also earn their respect.
  • Zizoo 20 Feb 2014 12:05:17 8,108 posts
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    Also throw in a "YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!"
  • Salaman 20 Feb 2014 12:06:46 18,861 posts
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    Wunty_Phyve wrote:
    your duodenum
    Your what?
    /googles
  • smoothpete 20 Feb 2014 12:08:07 31,331 posts
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    I would definitely hire Load to represent me in court

    I am the law, bitches!

    Edited by smoothpete at 12:08:37 20-02-2014
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