The many ways porn has lied to us Page 5

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  • Rodney 27 Apr 2013 08:16:58 1,930 posts
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    morriss wrote:
    I've met women like that, and I've absolutely wanted to do the things you inexplicably say you wouldn't.

    I've also had a girl masturbate and lick her own nipples during intercourse. It didn't last much longer after that.

    .
    the intercourse or the relationship?
  • elstoof 27 Apr 2013 08:17:47 8,332 posts
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    All we need now is Michael J Fox to tell us Thats One To Grow On and this educational segue will be complete.
  • mrpon 27 Apr 2013 08:35:30 29,596 posts
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    Pepsipop wrote:
    Men can't last for ages before cuming
    We can, it just depends how much we respect the woman.

    Give yourself 5 or gig, you're worth it.

  • dominalien 27 Apr 2013 08:40:14 7,072 posts
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    mrpon wrote:
    Pepsipop wrote:
    Men can't last for ages before cuming
    We can, it just depends how much we respect the woman.
    Respect? I have to try that.

    So far, it's only been down to the amount of alcohol I had in my blood.

    PSN: DonOsito

  • dominalien 27 Apr 2013 08:41:17 7,072 posts
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    Rodney wrote:
    morriss wrote:
    I've met women like that, and I've absolutely wanted to do the things you inexplicably say you wouldn't.

    I've also had a girl masturbate and lick her own nipples during intercourse. It didn't last much longer after that.

    .
    the intercourse or the relationship?
    I was wondering the same thing. I'm guessing he meant the intercourse, possibly followed by the relationship, depending on how the girl took it.

    PSN: DonOsito

  • ZuluHero 27 Apr 2013 08:48:21 4,350 posts
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    mrpon wrote:
    Pepsipop wrote:
    Men can't last for ages before cuming
    We can, it just depends how much we respect the woman.
    Or how much we don't care... Besides most men can regulate, and its easier the more often we do it. If you have weeks in between then most guys will get over excited...

    Pow, right in the kisser. Or something.

    I don't know if porn lies to us perse, its more like a compounded example of all the stuff that people might get up to or fantasise about.
  • Big-Swiss 27 Apr 2013 08:55:40 8,257 posts
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    but honestly, does someone know how they can get anal and squeeze the cum out without squeezing any shit out?

    That has always amazed me
  • dominalien 27 Apr 2013 08:57:18 7,072 posts
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    Enema 5 minutes before the shooting.

    PSN: DonOsito

  • jonsaan 27 Apr 2013 09:06:41 25,450 posts
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    Real sex doesn't just let you have a bit of a boob fondle before asking for credit card details.

    FCUTA!

  • Nades 27 Apr 2013 10:25:15 1,689 posts
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    I heard they aren't aloud to eat for 12 hours or something.

    Liverpool FC
    _______

    XbL: Nades x
    PSN: EU-Nades

  • RyanDS 27 Apr 2013 10:32:31 9,863 posts
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    Pepsipop wrote:
    Very amusing thread.

    Men don't have foot long penises.

    Men can't last for ages before cuming.

    Men actually sweat a lot.

    They are not all muscular.
    Stop talking about yourself for fucks sake, not all men are as useless as you in bed.
  • RyanDS 27 Apr 2013 10:33:51 9,863 posts
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    Shikasama wrote:
    RyanDS wrote:
    Pepsipop wrote:
    Very amusing thread.

    Men don't have foot long penises.

    Men can't last for ages before cuming.

    Men actually sweat a lot.

    They are not all muscular.
    Stop talking about yourself for fucks sake, not all men are as useless as you in bed.
    You realise he's a she?
    Yeah right! And I am a 18 year old busty blonde cheerleader.
  • dominalien 27 Apr 2013 10:35:55 7,072 posts
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    Haven't we had this conversation before?

    PSN: DonOsito

  • Deleted user 27 April 2013 10:36:07
    RyanDS wrote:
    Yeah right! And I am a 18 year old busty blonde cheerleader.
    One of those that likes having sex in front of all of her mates, right?
  • dominalien 27 Apr 2013 10:38:14 7,072 posts
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    Shikasama wrote:
    RyanDS wrote:
    Yeah right! And I am a 18 year old busty blonde cheerleader.
    You should get a website, could make some money
    You mean you're not subscribed to her redtube channel? Everybody else on here is.

    Edited by dominalien at 10:38:40 27-04-2013

    PSN: DonOsito

  • ZuluHero 27 Apr 2013 10:56:26 4,350 posts
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    One thing I have learned is that some women are like porn stars in the first few years of a relationship but not as much after 12 years and children.
  • Nades 27 Apr 2013 11:16:06 1,689 posts
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    Yeah cos by then, they have everything out of you they wanted, not to mention all your money as well.

    Liverpool FC
    _______

    XbL: Nades x
    PSN: EU-Nades

  • dominalien 27 Apr 2013 11:19:22 7,072 posts
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    So cynical.

    PSN: DonOsito

  • Ginger 27 Apr 2013 11:23:30 6,922 posts
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    dominalien wrote:
    So cynical.
    so true

    London open taekwondo champion

  • ZuluHero 27 Apr 2013 11:43:47 4,350 posts
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    I think its partly to do with that women grow up while men don't. We want to young and promiscuous forever.
  • convercide 27 Apr 2013 12:03:46 6,210 posts
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    DUFFMAN5 wrote:
    Salaman wrote:
    In porn movies, if a dude is ironing naked, his mrs will come home and jump his bones.

    In real life, a dude ironing naked will accidentally touch his knob with the iron, burning himself and pass out on the floor where his mum will then find him.
    Excellent, I doff my cap Sir :-)
    Just reading through this thread and yes, this is hilarious. On this note, I wonder how many male pornstars snap their banjo strings?

    EDIT: I mean, some of them really do go ten to the dozen while in the marmite highway, surely there'll be a significantly larger quotient in the porn population?

    Edited by convercide at 12:08:51 27-04-2013

    If you can read this, you don't need glasses.

  • ZuluHero 27 Apr 2013 12:20:16 4,350 posts
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    Female contraceptives are very good...I've never had protected sex with my partner (of 12 years) and we only have one child and she was totally planned.
  • morriss 27 Apr 2013 15:51:24 71,287 posts
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    Rodney wrote:
    morriss wrote:
    I've met women like that, and I've absolutely wanted to do the things you inexplicably say you wouldn't.

    I've also had a girl masturbate and lick her own nipples during intercourse. It didn't last much longer after that.

    .
    the intercourse or the relationship?
    :)

    The intercourse. I splurged. :)
  • Deleted user 27 April 2013 16:06:52
    ZuluHero wrote:
    I think its partly to do with that women grow up while men don't. We want to young and promiscuous forever.
    Growing up doesn't mean you have to stop enjoying sex and not bother making an effort anymore. Far too many people get married and then stop giving a shit.
  • morriss 27 Apr 2013 17:04:27 71,287 posts
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    Sex with my wife is better now than it ever was. The ether you get to know each other, the more comfortable you feel, the more you can perhaps push the boundaries slightly.

    I dunno, in my limited experience, it seems that women enjoy "the moment". If the moment is right, almost anything goes. It's just getting right that's the killer.
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