Random Musings Page 63

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  • DrStrangelove 15 May 2013 03:27:32 2,568 posts
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  • DrStrangelove 15 May 2013 03:44:35 2,568 posts
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    Actually, on (true) German toilets, there is no splashback.



    The "Flachspüler" (flat flusher) was invented for being able to inspect your droppings, so that you could tell if something was wrong with your innards. The real advantage is: no splashback.

    No matter how hard you try, and no matter the nature of your droppings, it won't spray in your [insert what you like here].

    You could argue there was more bog brushing this way, and to some extent there is, but with foreign loos you need to do that too if you didn't aim well enough. And if you sat a little bit too far back, you'll have to do the same sort of cleaning.

    it's increasingly replaced by splashback toilets even in Germany, but I'm convinced it's the superior concept.

    And if only for being able to marvel at your creations.
  • OptimusPube 15 May 2013 04:45:08 2,426 posts
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    This American spy that has been caught is no James Bond is he, his wigs are hilarious and the looks on his face are priceless, he's making the American secret service look like a right Mickey Mouse operation.

    Is it supposed to be like this?

  • King_Edward 15 May 2013 07:37:51 11,454 posts
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    @DrStrangelove

    Why not just shit in a sandwich bag? Marvel at your handiwork all you want, then straight in the bin. No cleaning at all.
  • Alastair 15 May 2013 08:11:09 14,981 posts
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    Nexus_6 wrote:
    Got my first ever raised bed up and running in the garden last month. Plenty nice vegetated planted and the satisfaction of those first shoots sprouting up was immense.

    Looked out the window lunchtime and TNT favourite row of leaves has been decimated - some bastard cat has dug it all up. On closer inspection it was so the prick could bury a massive, stinking, orange shit amongst my radish, the cunt.
    Cats are cunts in this regard!
    You need to get some netting up. Once the plants are more established you can remove the netting and the cats won't be a problem. Then you'll just have to worry about slugs and snails!

    Not as nice as I used to be

  • Deleted user 15 May 2013 08:17:52
    Cats are just cunts.
  • Alastair 15 May 2013 08:18:29 14,981 posts
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    Well, there is that too.

    Not as nice as I used to be

  • Nexus_6 15 May 2013 08:59:23 3,836 posts
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    Thanks Alistair - I had just removed the netting there at the weekend as we had put lion or tiger poo or whatever is meant to keep them away :-(

    Netting now back up!
  • localnotail 15 May 2013 12:52:58 23,093 posts
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    neilka wrote:
    I'm confused, is local annoyed about mrpon's slippery poo?
    Sorry, no, I was thinking about woodchip. If we'd just painted over it last week, we'd be back sitting in a white woodchipped front room, watching GoT by now. Instead we are stuck in DIY hell, working late every night discovering terrible plaster flaws and leaks in bay window flat roofs. Haven't even started painting yet. *sigh*


    Meanwhile, I'm quite confused by this. I guess even vegans get objectified.

    Edited by localnotail at 12:53:16 15-05-2013

    A strange game. The only winning move is not to play.

  • DrStrangelove 15 May 2013 12:53:15 2,568 posts
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    @King_Edward

    Hard to hit though, but in my experience a handy option if you're on the bus or something.
  • Mr_Sleep 15 May 2013 12:56:36 16,280 posts
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    localnotail wrote:
    Meanwhile, I'm quite confused by this. I guess even vegans get objectified.
    There is a woman on there called empathy and she looks like her name has nothing in common with her. I'm intrigued to know how the photos were chosen as some of them are just plain odd.

    You are a factory of sadness.

  • Bremenacht 15 May 2013 13:03:36 15,819 posts
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    DrStrangelove wrote:
    Actually, on (true) German toilets, there is no splashback.



    The "Flachspüler" (flat flusher) was invented for being able to inspect your droppings, so that you could tell if something was wrong with your innards. The real advantage is: no splashback.

    No matter how hard you try, and no matter the nature of your droppings, it won't spray in your [insert what you like here].

    You could argue there was more bog brushing this way, and to some extent there is, but with foreign loos you need to do that too if you didn't aim well enough. And if you sat a little bit too far back, you'll have to do the same sort of cleaning.

    it's increasingly replaced by splashback toilets even in Germany, but I'm convinced it's the superior concept.

    And if only for being able to marvel at your creations.
    PIssing would be messy.

    Once an eagle taught me courage. And I will never forget that day

  • localnotail 15 May 2013 13:57:35 23,093 posts
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    Mr_Sleep wrote:
    localnotail wrote:
    Meanwhile, I'm quite confused by this. I guess even vegans get objectified.
    There is a woman on there called empathy and she looks like her name has nothing in common with her. I'm intrigued to know how the photos were chosen as some of them are just plain odd.
    She looks a lot more like a "Discipline" to me. I like how most of the lads haven't really bothered.

    I do like Amy though. She seems nice.

    A strange game. The only winning move is not to play.

  • billythekid 15 May 2013 14:02:36 10,815 posts
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    localnotail wrote:
    Mr_Sleep wrote:
    localnotail wrote:
    Meanwhile, I'm quite confused by this. I guess even vegans get objectified.
    There is a woman on there called empathy and she looks like her name has nothing in common with her. I'm intrigued to know how the photos were chosen as some of them are just plain odd.
    She looks a lot more like a "Discipline" to me. I like how most of the lads haven't really bothered.

    I do like Amy though. She seems nice.
    Some of them even look almost healthy!
  • LeoliansBro 15 May 2013 14:40:42 41,905 posts
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    Thought provoking.

    LB, you really are a massive geek.

  • Salaman 15 May 2013 14:42:16 18,265 posts
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    Bremenacht wrote:
    DrStrangelove wrote:
    Actually, on (true) German toilets, there is no splashback.



    The "Flachspüler" (flat flusher) was invented for being able to inspect your droppings, so that you could tell if something was wrong with your innards. The real advantage is: no splashback.

    No matter how hard you try, and no matter the nature of your droppings, it won't spray in your [insert what you like here].

    You could argue there was more bog brushing this way, and to some extent there is, but with foreign loos you need to do that too if you didn't aim well enough. And if you sat a little bit too far back, you'll have to do the same sort of cleaning.

    it's increasingly replaced by splashback toilets even in Germany, but I'm convinced it's the superior concept.

    And if only for being able to marvel at your creations.
    PIssing would be messy.
    They all sit down for that.
  • cubbymoore 15 May 2013 14:47:18 36,443 posts
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    I bet those flat flusher loos really stink out the place. Christ. You may as well curl one onto a plate.
  • Deckard1 15 May 2013 14:48:10 25,499 posts
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    LeoliansBro wrote:
    Thought provoking.
    Theres a whole lot of bollocks in there.

    Called it

  • Bremenacht 15 May 2013 14:53:13 15,819 posts
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    Charles Stross does do some cracking stories though. Otto recommended a couple as an Iain M Banks alternative.

    Once an eagle taught me courage. And I will never forget that day

  • 4gate 15 May 2013 15:05:31 362 posts
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    When Economist articles are mentioning the ideas of Charles Stross, it is either time to celebrate or panic, not sure which.
  • Mr_Sleep 15 May 2013 15:12:41 16,280 posts
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    Bremenacht wrote:
    Charles Stross does do some cracking stories though. Otto recommended a couple as an Iain M Banks alternative.
    A god Iain M Banks alternative is Ken McLoed.

    You are a factory of sadness.

  • Vortex808 15 May 2013 15:13:05 6,573 posts
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    localnotail wrote:

    Sorry, no, I was thinking about woodchip. If we'd just painted over it last week, we'd be back sitting in a white woodchipped front room, watching GoT by now. Instead we are stuck in DIY hell, working late every night discovering terrible plaster flaws and leaks in bay window flat roofs. Haven't even started painting yet. *sigh*
    :)

    I can certainly relate to this. We are removing woodchip from a ceiling just now prior to getting the room re-plastered. Then only one more room upsatirs will have woodchip remaining. Along with the large living room ceiling and a small hall section downstairs.

    Best to take it a little at a time though, so they can wait for another time. It has taken us 9 years to have the motivation for the struggle to de-woodchip two bedrooms and the main hallways/stairwell ceilings. Albeit, with a 5+ year hiatus due to sprog arrival mind.

    If a time machine is ever invented, I aim to go back and tell the inventor of the bloody stuff *exactly* what I think of them.

    Edited by Vortex808 at 15:13:53 15-05-2013
  • mikeck 15 May 2013 15:18:04 1,838 posts
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    @cubbymoore Not only do they stink, but you lose that sense of satisfaction when you have a really weighty shit that is accompanied by a really deep sounding "bloop" as it hits the water.

    Edited by mikeck at 15:19:28 15-05-2013
  • Deckard1 15 May 2013 15:23:15 25,499 posts
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    I imagine the skid marks are something to behold

    Called it

  • Nexus_6 15 May 2013 15:55:53 3,836 posts
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    Deckard1 wrote:
    I imagine the skid marks are something to behold
    That's why Germany is the world leader in power hose technology. All that Karcher pish is just so they can blast caked-on shit from their silly socialist toilets.
  • mal 15 May 2013 16:32:20 22,013 posts
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    I've used one of those flatflushers. The jet of water it creates when you flush it is really quite impressive, and almost always gets all the crud off the plateau in one flush, so there's nothing left around to stink. To piss in one I need to stand a little closer so my aim can reach the water, but it's perfectly doable.

    Cubby didn't know how to turn off sigs!

  • DrStrangelove 15 May 2013 17:24:00 2,568 posts
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    @Bremenacht

    Pissing is always messy. There's always fine spray going everywhere beside the loo. The flat flusher produces no more splashback than a foreign loo though.
  • DrStrangelove 15 May 2013 17:24:48 2,568 posts
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    cubbymoore wrote:
    I bet those flat flusher loos really stink out the place. Christ. You may as well curl one onto a plate.
    They do if you don't flush. Don't know your habits.
  • DrStrangelove 15 May 2013 17:26:07 2,568 posts
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    And I have the feeling you're making fun of this.

    This is a serious matter, just like anything else.
  • Bremenacht 15 May 2013 17:29:24 15,819 posts
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    Mr_Sleep wrote:
    Bremenacht wrote:
    Charles Stross does do some cracking stories though. Otto recommended a couple as an Iain M Banks alternative.
    A god Iain M Banks alternative is Ken McLoed.
    Name the best to start with please. I like to start with the best, and see how much else I can tolerate. :)

    Once an eagle taught me courage. And I will never forget that day

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