Real Life: The Game

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  • mcmothercruncher 1 Feb 2013 14:01:10 6,447 posts
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    Because I'm not nearly O.C.D. enough, I need some more real life game-y habits I can pick up that'll slowly cripple me and turn my world into dysfunctional poop.

    Currently, I'm "playing" the Motorway Lane Changing game each week when I visit my folks.
    On the M5, I have to move from one lane to another without any of my tyres touching the cat's eyes and going "whump". Quite hard and oh, so very satisfying.

    Any more you just can't help playing away from the joypad?
  • Murbal 1 Feb 2013 14:02:51 21,922 posts
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    Teabag must be thrown into the mug from a distance of at least one metre.
  • LeoliansBro 1 Feb 2013 14:03:37 43,227 posts
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    Morning alarm must be snoozed within three sets of beeps.

    LB, you really are a massive geek.

  • Lexx87 1 Feb 2013 14:03:52 20,869 posts
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    Haha I like the sound of that!

    I sometimes play the Look At This Particular Point In The Distance Without Averting Your Eyes At All Until You Reach It game.

    Keeping that focus on the street is uch more difficult than you think.

    Speak the truth hussy!

  • MrTomFTW Moderator 1 Feb 2013 14:08:09 37,339 posts
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    How far can you get from the toilet bowl without getting any piss on the rim?

    One to play at work.

    Follow me on Twitter: @MrTom
    Voted by the community "Best mod" 2011, 2012 and 2013.

  • neilka 1 Feb 2013 14:08:47 15,653 posts
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    Use Public Transport Without Stabbing Everyone Else To Death
  • Lexx87 1 Feb 2013 14:10:31 20,869 posts
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    the problem with that one is you always do end up with piss on the rim.

    Speak the truth hussy!

  • quadfather 1 Feb 2013 14:11:22 11,826 posts
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    When filling up my glass with water at work, I have to throw it from my left hand and catch it in my right hand (which is underneath the water spout) before pressing the water button

    I'm turning into Rimmer

    psn quaddy456, Dark Souls tips

  • MetalDog 1 Feb 2013 14:11:58 23,708 posts
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    Trying to match a tube travellers to the stereotypical or fantasy medieval profession they look like they'd suit the most.

    Bar wench
    Squire
    Lady in waiting
    Monk
    Soothsayer
    Warrior princess
    etc.

    Never bothered developing a scoring system, but that and pretending I'm living in some blade runner type future and trying to 'spot the replicant' has got me through some teeth-grindingly annoying journeys.

    -- boobs do nothing for me, I want moustaches and chest hair.

  • Alastair 1 Feb 2013 14:19:37 15,441 posts
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    I play a sort of imaginary Pokemon Snap game in my head, but instead of pokemon, I am trying to snap as many pairs of boobies as possible.

    Surely all blokes play this game.

    Not as nice as I used to be

  • neilka 1 Feb 2013 14:23:01 15,653 posts
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    Do you try to catch them in your Pokeball?
  • Lexx87 1 Feb 2013 14:25:31 20,869 posts
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    ecosse plays that but where Pokeball = Basement Dungeon

    Speak the truth hussy!

  • Murbal 1 Feb 2013 14:25:47 21,922 posts
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    @MetalDog I require photographic evidence of all warrior princess types please.
  • mrpon 1 Feb 2013 14:29:46 28,437 posts
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    Petrol pump has to be stopped on a whole figure.

    Give yourself 5 or gig, you're worth it.

  • Murbal 1 Feb 2013 14:31:20 21,922 posts
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    mrpon wrote:
    Petrol pump has to be stopped on a whole figure.
    Much harder given todays pump prices.
  • MrTomFTW Moderator 1 Feb 2013 14:33:24 37,339 posts
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    mrpon wrote:
    Petrol pump has to be stopped on a whole figure.
    That's getting more and more difficult. Although some you can actually set a figure before you start.

    Follow me on Twitter: @MrTom
    Voted by the community "Best mod" 2011, 2012 and 2013.

  • graysonavich 1 Feb 2013 14:33:56 7,309 posts
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    Isn't this a bit insulting to people who deal with this kind of stuff on an all too regular basis?
  • Murbal 1 Feb 2013 14:35:30 21,922 posts
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    graysonavich wrote:
    Isn't this a bit insulting to people who deal with this kind of stuff on an all too regular basis?
    Filling up with petrol? Making tea? Classifying warrior princesses?
  • Lexx87 1 Feb 2013 14:35:47 20,869 posts
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    Well I think we're learning that we all do it one way or another because all our lives are crushingly unfulfilling.

    Speak the truth hussy!

  • Ultrasoundwave 1 Feb 2013 15:09:54 3,264 posts
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    Whilst peeing at a urinal, award yourself 5 points everytime you wash someone elses stray pube down the plughole.

    Deduct 5 points if you get one stuck on the urinal cake.

    "The worst part is, I'll have to have the break-up sex with myself!"

  • Lexx87 1 Feb 2013 15:18:53 20,869 posts
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    Urgh

    Speak the truth hussy!

  • Bremenacht 1 Feb 2013 15:31:56 17,613 posts
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    mcmothercruncher wrote:
    Currently, I'm "playing" the Motorway Lane Changing game each week when I visit my folks.
    On the M5, I have to move from one lane to another without any of my tyres touching the cat's eyes and going "whump". Quite hard and oh, so very satisfying.

    Any more you just can't help playing away from the joypad?
    Oh, I've played that! Any less than 70 is cheating though.

    Recognising headlights in your mirror at night is another good round in the greater game of staying awake on long, boring journeys.

    Moving away from the urinal as far as you can without spilling before the pressure drops and you have to move back in.

    Smiling at people as you walk to work (or on the tube) and guessing who'll smile back. Answer: no-one, unless they're drunk or it's hometime on Friday.
  • mcmothercruncher 1 Feb 2013 15:32:35 6,447 posts
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    Murbal wrote:
    mrpon wrote:
    Petrol pump has to be stopped on a whole figure.
    Much harder given todays pump prices.
    It's like the pumps have levelled up over the years.
  • imamazed 1 Feb 2013 15:34:22 5,520 posts
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    Bremenacht wrote:

    Smiling at people as you walk to work (or on the tube) and guessing who'll smile back. Answer: no-one, unless they're drunk or it's hometime on Friday.
    Utterly unforgiveable that. Breaks the most important rule of underground travel: no eye contact. Next thing you'll be saying you've talked to someone on there...

    Edited by imamazed at 15:34:50 01-02-2013

    Edited by imamazed at 15:35:12 01-02-2013
  • monkman76 1 Feb 2013 15:39:26 3,969 posts
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    Murbal wrote:
    Teabag must be thrown into the mug from a distance of at least one metre.
    No way, you too! Do you also have to take a step back every time you miss?
  • boo 1 Feb 2013 15:40:06 11,703 posts
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    If you walk along the pavement, you usually have to dodge round people.
    However (and I've tried this, and it works), for people coming towards you, if you make eye contact with them and don't break it, you can carry on walking in a straight line and they will always get out of your way.

    Obviously doesn't work for people walking with their head down looking at their phone, but I'm pretty sure it's legal to just push them into oncoming traffic.

    So set yourself a target (end of the road, set of traffic lights etc) and see how far you can get walking in a straight line, like the guy in the Bittersweet Symphony video.

    You divert from your path, or hit someone, you lose.

    Edited by boo at 15:40:48 01-02-2013

    Just Another Lego Blog

  • Murbal 1 Feb 2013 15:44:01 21,922 posts
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    monkman76 wrote:
    Murbal wrote:
    Teabag must be thrown into the mug from a distance of at least one metre.
    No way, you too! Do you also have to take a step back every time you miss?
    Don't be so f***ing ridiculous ;-)
  • Deleted user 1 February 2013 15:47:23
    I fucking hate gamification, especially given it's the current corporate strategy fad. Shitty office types think changing "performance reviews" into "leveling up" and giving employees achievements foster productivity, when it really just makes everyone with an ounce of sense wish middle-management dead.

    Edited by meme at 15:48:23 01-02-2013
  • monkman76 1 Feb 2013 15:58:36 3,969 posts
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    Murbal wrote:
    monkman76 wrote:
    Murbal wrote:
    Teabag must be thrown into the mug from a distance of at least one metre.
    No way, you too! Do you also have to take a step back every time you miss?
    Don't be so f***ing ridiculous ;-)
    N00b
  • monkman76 1 Feb 2013 15:59:28 3,969 posts
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    meme wrote:
    I fucking hate gamification, especially given it's the current corporate strategy fad. Shitty office types think changing "performance reviews" into "leveling up" and giving employees achievements foster productivity, when it really just makes everyone with an ounce of sense wish middle-management dead.
    Is this a genuine thing? Like, woah.
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