Log of The Apocalypse, 21.12.12. Page 5

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  • localnotail 21 Dec 2012 12:00:06 23,093 posts
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    @sport - Go spank your own monkey.

    A strange game. The only winning move is not to play.

  • Whizzo 21 Dec 2012 12:00:33 43,124 posts
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    neilka wrote:
    DOES ANYONE KNOW THE ANTIDOTE FOR DRAIN CLEANER
    Having access to Toxbase I had a look... Yeah if someone did drink any it's quite involved!

    This is a fun part:

    Do NOT give neutralising chemicals as heat produced during neutralisation reactions may increase injury.

    This space left intentionally blank.

  • Gl3n Moderator 21 Dec 2012 12:08:08 5,581 posts
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    I'm in Sweden seeing family for christmas. Last night I went on a snowy walk with my dad and we smoked a cuban cigar each. Dizziness, puking and an irrational appetite for gerkins, all were my bed fellows.


    Today I have a monster headache. It might be the end of the world.. WE DIDN'T LISTEN!
  • Tryhard 21 Dec 2012 12:10:49 3,973 posts
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    THFourteen wrote:
    wtf. i hid under my desk for nothign
    You got it easy,I punched my boss and bank manager,and stood in Morrisons glass fridge cabinet naked, while drinking Dr Peppers.
  • nickthegun 21 Dec 2012 12:24:31 59,908 posts
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    LeoliansBro wrote:
    Or what if the Mayans were talking a lot of crap?
    I think the thing is that they werent talking crap as much as they thought 'You know what? 5000 years is enough for a calendar. Im going to go and sacrifice a bitch'

    ---------------------------------------------------------
    someone say something funny

  • neilka 21 Dec 2012 12:26:12 15,914 posts
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    A tradition I intend to uphold this evening

    A map is like comparing velocity and speed.

  • Deckard1 21 Dec 2012 12:28:27 27,981 posts
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    I've just been to the fridge and the salad cream has went out of date today.

    Turns out I'd only picked up the bloody mayannaise by accident.


    [img]http://www.tmcentertainment.co.uk/images/speaker-index/SpeakOutTomOConner.jpg
    [/img]

    Edited by Deckard1 at 14:55:29 21-12-2012
  • FogHeart 21 Dec 2012 12:36:09 946 posts
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    The Sun will come out tomorrow
  • skuzzbag 21 Dec 2012 12:39:56 5,638 posts
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  • FogHeart 21 Dec 2012 12:44:17 946 posts
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    Yeah, but my one doesn't scare the crap out of me.
  • Deleted user 21 December 2012 13:04:32
    Somewhere in a parallel universe the world is ending. I'm sitting miserably in my underpants sobbing whilst i decided to to spend my last 5 pounds on the telvision X channel whilst the world around me is crumbling to dust.
  • SClaw 21 Dec 2012 13:18:32 826 posts
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    joelstinton wrote:
    Somewhere in a parallel universe the world is ending. I'm sitting miserably in my underpants sobbing whilst i decided to to spend my last 5 pounds on the telvision X channel whilst the world around me is crumbling to dust.
    Huh. That sounds like my usual Friday evening.
  • oceanmotion 21 Dec 2012 13:22:07 15,938 posts
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    Pay for porn, must be a parallel universe.
  • neilka 21 Dec 2012 13:22:32 15,914 posts
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    Does anyone know a good plastic surgeon? I've got through so much wanking in the last month that my cock looks like a tinned plum tomato.

    A map is like comparing velocity and speed.

  • ZuluHero 21 Dec 2012 13:47:20 4,145 posts
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    nickthegun wrote:
    LeoliansBro wrote:
    Or what if the Mayans were talking a lot of crap?
    I think the thing is that they werent talking crap as much as they thought 'You know what? 5000 years is enough for a calendar. Im going to go and sacrifice a bitch'
    That was mostly the Aztec you know? And the Mayans get such a bad rep it :)
  • senso-ji 21 Dec 2012 14:54:03 5,909 posts
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  • Deleted user 21 December 2012 15:00:20
    Deckard1 wrote:
    the salad cream has went out of date today
    UNPOSSIBLE
  • Bremenacht 21 Dec 2012 15:10:25 18,242 posts
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    I left my tea brewing far too long because I was munching on a mince-pie-of-the-apocalypse while looking at Steam sale stuff for too long. Now it's luke-warm. :-(
  • Spong 21 Dec 2012 17:10:15 525 posts
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    So did I miss the apocalypse then? It was supposed to happen at 11:11am GMT, but I was in bed asleep.
  • MrTomFTW Moderator 21 Dec 2012 17:19:59 38,144 posts
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    My daughter fell out of bed and fractured her collar bone last night. From the way she's crying it feels like the end of the world.

    Follow me on Twitter: @MrTom
    Voted by the community "Best mod" 2011, 2012 and 2013.

  • oceanmotion 21 Dec 2012 17:24:43 15,938 posts
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    One of those horrible falling out of bed scares but you actually do fall and hurt something. Merry Christmas.

    Still living the dream fall and yet to fall for real. Roll on next sleep.

    Edited by oceanmotion at 17:26:06 21-12-2012
  • MrTomFTW Moderator 21 Dec 2012 17:28:49 38,144 posts
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    I think the idea is to NOT roll during sleep actually.

    Follow me on Twitter: @MrTom
    Voted by the community "Best mod" 2011, 2012 and 2013.

  • neilka 21 Dec 2012 17:39:19 15,914 posts
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    Spong wrote:
    So did I miss the apocalypse then? It was supposed to happen at 11:11am GMT, but I was in bed asleep.
    Then how do you know you're not...

    DEAD ALL ALONG!!!

    A map is like comparing velocity and speed.

  • BartonFink 21 Dec 2012 17:39:30 34,912 posts
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    We all dead yet?
  • JoeBlade 21 Dec 2012 17:43:42 2,545 posts
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    With all the end times predictions in recent times it almost feels like a yearly event now.

    MERRY APOCALYPSE EVERYONE!
  • DaM 21 Dec 2012 17:44:00 13,157 posts
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    Eh remember the Nostradamus quatrain supposedly tying in Gangnam thingy with today, referring to the amount of zeros if the view counter hit a billion?

    Gagnam views pass 1 billion.

    I also just won an ace hamper in a raffle - there's definitely a disturbance in the force.

    I'm going back under the table.
  • Tryhard 21 Dec 2012 18:17:07 3,973 posts
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    You mean I still have to go Friday food shopping in the afterlife?
  • jonsaan 21 Dec 2012 18:31:06 25,352 posts
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    Have we had the, 'oh no we interpreted it wrong and the date is actually going to be xxxx' statement yet?

    Or are we going with the 'actually it's the start of a new era' one?

    FCUTA!

  • RedSparrows 21 Dec 2012 20:45:33 22,655 posts
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    How about we go with 'meh' and ignore the cuckoo industry.
  • senso-ji 21 Dec 2012 20:49:49 5,909 posts
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    Worst Armageddon ever.
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