Tresspassing child carol singers

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  • thelzdking 17 Dec 2012 18:09:03 4,367 posts
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    Just now I was upstairs when I heard a noise. I head down the stairs to see a child bedecked in a shabby, tinsel-lined star costume stood in my hallway who, upon seeing me, proceeds to break into a below average rendition of We Wish You a Merry Christmas whilst waving a bucket at me. I was so amazed that I didn't know what to say for a few seconds. Then I overcame my shock and told him that I was very busy and asked him to please leave my house, which he did only after I had repeated my request several times.

    Now call me old fashioned if you like, but I believe that carol singers should knock and wait for an invitation before entering a person's house.

    /perplexed rant over

    Edited by thelzdking at 18:09:36 17-12-2012

    Edited by thelzdking at 18:10:06 17-12-2012
  • Deleted user 17 December 2012 18:11:45
    I'm sorry but the police are never going to believe this when they come to arrest you for kidnapping that child.

    Edited by Aargh. at 18:11:55 17-12-2012

    Edited by Aargh. at 18:12:00 17-12-2012

    Edited by Aargh. at 18:12:08 17-12-2012

    Edited by Aargh. at 18:12:15 17-12-2012
  • smoothpete 17 Dec 2012 18:14:27 31,520 posts
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    "thank you, Santa!"
  • neilka 17 Dec 2012 18:14:35 15,992 posts
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    WWJSD

    A map is like comparing velocity and speed.

  • Kostabi 17 Dec 2012 18:17:08 4,932 posts
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    You were being burgled.

    If you're in "oh sorry sir, let me sing a Christmas carol for you" or "hey lads, this cunt ain't home fill ya bags up".
  • kinky_mong 17 Dec 2012 18:20:36 10,302 posts
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    What Kostabi said.

    All the eurogamers who actually play with each other on xbl rather than just post pseudointellectual pc handwringing bollocks on the forums, love the shit out of biggy.

  • thelzdking 17 Dec 2012 18:22:54 4,367 posts
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    It would've been Jimmy Savile's Christmas dream come true: an unaccompanied child entering of their own accord would probably constitute consent in his eyes.
  • Psychotext 17 Dec 2012 18:24:18 54,242 posts
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    Aargh. wrote:
    Edited by Aargh. at 18:11:55 17-12-2012

    Edited by Aargh. at 18:12:00 17-12-2012

    Edited by Aargh. at 18:12:08 17-12-2012

    Edited by Aargh. at 18:12:15 17-12-2012
    How did you get four edits into such a simple sentence?
  • ZuluHero 17 Dec 2012 18:24:48 4,172 posts
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    Its a dickensian christmas!

    How old?
  • shitfuckcunt 17 Dec 2012 18:27:38 7,359 posts
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    Should of kicked the little cunt in the face.
  • thelzdking 17 Dec 2012 18:31:52 4,367 posts
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    It say a lot about my cynical nature that I think that Kostabi may be right.

    In which case I would've been legally entitled to shoot the child, yeah?
  • neilka 17 Dec 2012 18:33:08 15,992 posts
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    Shoot him full of goose fat

    A map is like comparing velocity and speed.

  • Kostabi 17 Dec 2012 18:36:32 4,932 posts
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    I don't want to be right as people trespassing in your home is a pretty wretched thought but unless your door was wide open there's no other explanation that would fit.
  • danathjo 17 Dec 2012 18:39:15 7,390 posts
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    neilka wrote:
    Shoot him full of man fat
  • Popzeus 17 Dec 2012 18:39:48 8,330 posts
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    Even if the door was open, why else would it come in?

    Currently playing: Standing In A Car Park Simulator 2013

  • senso-ji 17 Dec 2012 18:41:37 5,917 posts
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    You left your front door unlocked and yet were shocked that someone let themselves in?
  • Kostabi 17 Dec 2012 18:43:20 4,932 posts
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    Popzeus wrote:
    Even if the door was open, why else would it come in?
    Might have knocked then stuck his head in to belt out some awesome chrimbo tunes. A bit like a singing bailiff.
  • mrpon 17 Dec 2012 18:51:27 28,947 posts
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    Should've gone all T'Pau on his ass.

    Give yourself 5 or gig, you're worth it.

  • Vortex808 17 Dec 2012 19:21:48 7,162 posts
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    mrpon wrote:
    Should've gone all T'Pau on his ass.
    Did he have some china in his hands?
  • skuzzbag 17 Dec 2012 19:48:20 5,647 posts
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    "Boy, come here so I can beat you soundly!"

  • Load_2.0 17 Dec 2012 19:55:36 19,303 posts
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    Ahahaha of course he was on the rob, that's almost as bad as "I am just looking for my dog"

    For future reference carol singers are like vampires they won't come in unless you invite them!

    Edited by Load_2.0 at 19:59:22 17-12-2012
  • Load_2.0 17 Dec 2012 19:58:51 19,303 posts
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    Here is a flow chart.

    There is an uninvited stranger in my house, are they robbing me?
    ll
    \/
    Yes.
  • 1Dgaf 17 Dec 2012 20:16:10 3,837 posts
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    I'd call the non essential police line. I suspect you were being burgled too.

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  • jonsaan 17 Dec 2012 20:26:30 25,349 posts
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    It would have been better if he'd come up the stairs and disturbed you knocking one out.

    FCUTA!

  • Lukus 17 Dec 2012 20:41:27 19,119 posts
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    Definitely on the rob. There's probably at least two of them too. I'd check behind your sofa.

    Paintings & Photographs

  • Kostabi 17 Dec 2012 20:57:47 4,932 posts
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    jonsaan wrote:
    It would have been better if he'd come up the stairs and disturbed you knocking one out.
    What's the etiquette of that? Being your own house I suppose the robber should allow you to finish, or is it a case of being the host that you politely excuse yourself and stop - much like when the hotel maid ignores the do not disturb sign.
  • neilka 17 Dec 2012 21:25:06 15,992 posts
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    You're meant to stop when the maid walks in?

    A map is like comparing velocity and speed.

  • Kostabi 17 Dec 2012 21:26:08 4,932 posts
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    I do, but only so she can't prove the stains on the curtains are mine.
  • thelzdking 17 Dec 2012 22:32:58 4,367 posts
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    I've been thinking he probably had something to do with the Mayans. Next time I'll know to kill him on sight.
  • SuperCoolEskimo 17 Dec 2012 22:57:05 9,853 posts
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    Seriously, how did he get in? Even if our front door is unlocked, you can't open it from outside without a key.
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