Stop! Vasectomy time! Page 3

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  • Scurrminator 16 Nov 2012 20:35:58 8,460 posts
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    Stealth 'I'm gay; chicks don't do it for me so I fake it' post!

    Edited by Scurrminator at 13:59:28 19-11-2012

    You dare to strike Scurrcules!?

  • Pinky_Floyd 16 Nov 2012 20:37:38 8,268 posts
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    Scurrminator wrote:
    Stealth I'm gay chicks don't do it for me so I fake it post!
    :D
  • Jono62 16 Nov 2012 20:37:51 14,274 posts
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    Nice way to come out of the closet, Scurrminator.
  • Wesbish 19 Nov 2012 11:19:24 23 posts
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    Good Luck Pinky Floyd
  • Jono62 19 Nov 2012 11:23:34 14,274 posts
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    If your story didn't put him that is!
  • mrpon 19 Nov 2012 12:13:03 29,432 posts
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    Purple Floyd

    Give yourself £5 or ½ gig, you're worth it.

  • Salaman 19 Nov 2012 13:36:36 19,493 posts
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    Scurrminator wrote:
    Stealth 'I'm gay chicks don't do it for me so I fake it' post!
    Thanks for sharing!
  • Wesbish 19 Nov 2012 13:37:02 23 posts
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    @jono62 Yep, still feel bad over the timing of that - did apologize a few posts back.
  • Salaman 19 Nov 2012 13:37:53 19,493 posts
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    Wesbish wrote:
    I never post on these forum although I read them most days, however given the subject in hand, I shall regale you all with my story (caution, wall of text follows).

    I went in for a vasectomy nearly three years ago now, all went well on the day and for the first two days after. However on the third day I picked up my youngest and somehow damaged one the clips they had used to seal the cuts.

    My scrotum (on the left side) promptly filled with blood (think around the size of an orange), prompting a trip to doctors.

    Doctor informed me that this was known as a scrotal hematoma and that although they could split the scrotum and drain it the risk of infection was very high the preferred option was to leave it as the blood would be absorbed back into the body and all would be well.

    So plenty of painkillers and 4 weeks off work, unable to do much as after the blood had solidified it was like my left nut was in a vice constantly.

    And then as if to add insult to injury, I picked an infection somewhere along the way and at the end of the fourth week, I woke up and walked into the toilet (as you do), and discovered yet more swelling.

    I called the wife in just in time for her to witness an explosion of yellow pus and what looked like raspberry jam shoot from the incision they made for the operation.

    Ambulance was duly called and three hours in luton a+e and I felt much better, went back to work the following day.

    My wife however will never forget cleaning the bathroom that day, I feel rather proud that I had managed to get the toilet, the bath and three of the four walls.......
    Best story to de-lurk for ever!
  • BillyBoozze 19 Nov 2012 14:10:46 7 posts
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    Feel so happy today:)

    Edited by BillyBoozze at 14:11:23 19-11-2012
  • S.J.Rogers 19 Nov 2012 15:12:44 3,557 posts
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    I have my vasectomy booked for the 12th December…

    Never had kids and defiantly don’t want them (Really don’t like kids at all) and the GF feels the same.

    I had to wait till I was 35 for the doctor to give the OK.

    Looking forward to it as afterwards it will take my mind of the whole fear of the unwanted situation. I will probably still use condoms as well, just to make sure..!

    Really DONT want kids...!!!
  • Pinky_Floyd 19 Nov 2012 20:07:41 8,268 posts
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    I'm counting down the seconds till SIZE OF A GRAPEFRUIT

    If I'm lucky.......
  • Pinky_Floyd 19 Nov 2012 20:08:04 8,268 posts
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    Maybe I could do a live youtube stream?
  • mrpon 19 Nov 2012 20:10:17 29,432 posts
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    thatwasmytube.com

    Give yourself £5 or ½ gig, you're worth it.

  • joeymoto108 19 Nov 2012 20:51:22 656 posts
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    I just fainted thanks to this thread.

    /Squeamish as hell

    'Look at you, hacker: a pathetic creature of meat and bone, panting and sweating as you run through my corridors. How can you challenge a perfect, immortal machine?'

  • Pinky_Floyd 19 Nov 2012 20:56:56 8,268 posts
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    mrpon wrote:
    thatwasmytube.com
    Lawl
  • ZuluHero 19 Nov 2012 21:14:22 4,246 posts
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    Pinky_Floyd wrote:
    I'm counting down the seconds till SIZE OF A GRAPEFRUIT

    If I'm lucky.......
    And if you're unlucky you'll might end up with two grapefruits ;)

    I'm seeing the doctor about mine next week. How long is the waiting list?
  • Load_2.0 19 Nov 2012 21:37:40 19,526 posts
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    Salaman wrote:
    Wesbish wrote:
    Icky story
    Best story to de-lurk for ever!
    Agreed. I wish all new posters arrived with such style!

    Edited by Load_2.0 at 21:38:07 19-11-2012
  • danathjo 19 Nov 2012 21:43:16 7,478 posts
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    I feel sick
  • oceanmotion 19 Nov 2012 21:47:27 16,098 posts
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    Do you still shoot your load but there is no swimmers or does nothing come out ?
  • mrpon 19 Nov 2012 21:53:31 29,432 posts
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    oceanmotion wrote:
    Do you still shoot your load but there is no swimmers or does nothing come out ?
    You just have this face permanently.

    Give yourself £5 or ½ gig, you're worth it.

  • jonsaan 19 Nov 2012 22:16:03 25,439 posts
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    Chemo therapy often renders one sterile. I am still fully functional even flying on one engine, but I have no idea if I am now sterile. I should really get it checked out I suppose.

    FCUTA!

  • Pinky_Floyd 19 Nov 2012 22:20:14 8,268 posts
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    ZuluHero wrote:
    Pinky_Floyd wrote:
    I'm counting down the seconds till SIZE OF A GRAPEFRUIT

    If I'm lucky.......
    And if you're unlucky you'll might end up with two grapefruits ;)

    I'm seeing the doctor about mine next week. How long is the waiting list?
    Here in Belfast? Ooooh I've been waiting since I first saw the consultant in February. In fact, last week I got a letter from the Hospital saying they were so far behind they were referring me to a private clinic. Within 2 days I got a phone call and they made an appointment for me within 2 weeks.
  • jonsaan 19 Nov 2012 22:22:47 25,439 posts
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    I reckon you'll be absolutely fine.

    FCUTA!

  • Load_2.0 19 Nov 2012 22:32:14 19,526 posts
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    Yeah what is the worst that could happen?





    Engorged and exploding blood and puss bollocks.
  • CosmicFuzz 19 Nov 2012 22:32:14 25,320 posts
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    Vasectomy AND condoms?!

    How patches are ruining the future of gaming My thoughts.

  • jonsaan 19 Nov 2012 22:35:12 25,439 posts
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    And when it's all over he'll be able to FHUTA with no worries of unwanted pregnancies......

    FCUTA!

  • CosmicFuzz 19 Nov 2012 22:47:41 25,320 posts
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    :-)

    How patches are ruining the future of gaming My thoughts.

  • Pinky_Floyd 19 Nov 2012 23:59:49 8,268 posts
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    A week from today I will be shaving my nuts so my wee fella is presentable.  If he is going to get his head chopped off, he will bloody well look good on the day.

    The first cut is the deepest.
  • Deleted user 20 November 2012 08:45:34
    CosmicFuzz wrote:
    Vasectomy AND condoms?!
    Was near enough 4 months before I was "clear" after my vasectomy so, yeah, vasectomy and condoms for a while.

    The worst bit about the snip aside from the discomfort at EG Expo (had mine done the day before the Leeds one a couple of years back) was the constant sperm tests. The hospital I went to didn't have a test room so I had to donate into a sample jar at home, tuck it under my armpit (needs to be kept close to body temperature) then drive like a maniac to get to the hospital within an hour. It was like a spunky episode of 24 that went on for four fucking months.
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